##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== Midweek Mayhem ----------------------------------------------- LIVE * IIWF Coliseum * 12 June 1996 [Opening graphics part to show hordes of fans packing the IIWF Coliseum. Fireworks explode in the rafters, and lights whizz around, casting colours over the ring and crowd. Above this spectacle and noise, cut to the broadcasters' table, where Larry Morton and Becky LaRue sit.] LM: Hello everybody! We're coming at you LIVE from the IIWF Coliseum with another dose of Midweek Mayhem! I'm Larry Morton, and this is Becky LaRue... BL: ...and once again, the pleasure's all yours. You know, Larry, I think we're going to see quite a few surprises here tonight. We've got Deathbringer going up against the newest Horseman, Jack Haley, and I think the not-so-jolly giant is going to pull off a victory. LM: Plus, of course, Joe Latta faces the debutant Prince Of Darkness. What a match that's going to be! Robski also makes his debut as he faces "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare... BL: ...and we will have the privilege of being joined here in the booth by none other than [inhales] Moondust! LM: [hesitates] What did you do that for? [Becky doesn't answer] In a special manager match, "Outlaw" Josey Wales, manager of the High Plains Drifters, battles the Senator, manager of High Velocity. BL: That's going to be a very... interesting... match. But we're going to get things underway with two individuals who seem to have forgotten which order they get dressed in: Casey "Whitebread" James and the Man Of Underpants On Over His Trousers. LM: Becky, will you please give it a rest?! Casey "Whitebread" James and Man of Steel vs. High Plains Drifters ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: You just knew it was a matter of time before these two teamed up. BL: Great. The Yankee Doodle Dimwit and the Man in Tights. What do you suppose M.O.S. on his chest stands for: Moldy Old Strategys? Mighty Odd Situation? My Outfit Stinks? LM: [Ignoring her] I think Casey and MOS will make a great team. We could see an upset here tonight. BL: Those two? Beat The Drifters? Larry, you should quit broadcasting and go into comedy. On second thought, just quit broadcasting. [There is a loud, adolescent, face pop and much waving of the American flag as "Whitebread" James and the Man of Steel enter side by side. They wave to the crowd. James delivers a smart salute to a serviceman in the audience. Man of Steel holds the ropes open for Casey to enter, but Casey does the same. They each motion to eachother, then do it again. Both enter at once.] BL: Well, I'm glad they finally figured out the easiest thing about wrestling. LM: C'mon now, they're gentlemen... BL: Compared to you... perhaps. [Hugo Montenegro's theme to "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly" whistles from the speakers. The Drifters slowly walk down the aisle, still seething from their earlier encounter. Pale Rider steps into the ring against Casey James. He tosses away his serape and spits at Casey. The timekeeper starts the match.] BL: The riders are beginning with Pale Rider to wear their opponent out, then the powerful Easy will tag in for the kill and cover. LM: A one-two punch of speed and power! BL: Don't pretend you know what you're talking about - you'll only confuse yourself. [There is little contact as Pale Rider keeps bouncing off the ring ropes ducking Casey James who spins wildly in the center of the ring swinging at air. Finally, Pale Rider connects with a cross-body block, the two roll to their feet. Casey goes down again to a leg-sweep. Laughing, Pale steps on his head.] LM: Casey James isn't a man to be toyed with, they shouldn't antagonize him that way. BL: Or he'll..? LM: He'll do something they don't like. BL: Like what, learn to wrestle? [James complains to the Ref about the head stomp as Pale relaxes in his corner. Easy Rider unlaces the padding from the turnbuckle. Casey rushes Pale who avoids. James catches himself on the ropes before hitting the bare buckle, and the crowd pops. He reprimands Pale with a wagging finger. Easy blindsides Casey with a forearm from the outside. Pale goes for the lateral press but is thrown off before the count can begin. Easy tags in.] BL: Whitebread makes good toast. [Suddenly Flare begins charging down the aisle, surrounded by officials and referees. He is clearly agitated, and points furiously at Casey. Casey turns on the apron and sees Flare.] LM: I guess Flare wants to turn up the heat! We haven't heard whether Casey and the Man Of Steel have accepted Flare's tag team challenge yet... although I'm sure they will. BL: You're sure, are you Larry? I don't think the Men In Tights are so stupid to deliberately sign for a match which they're bound to lose. On the other hand... [The officials force Flare away from the ring. Casey turns his attentions back to his beleaguered partner. He waves to the crowd and there is a pop. A chant of "U..S..A." begins, but fails. Easy moves in, delivering cominations of forearms and uppercuts. "Whitebread" retaliates with a headbutt which staggers them both. Man of Steel waves desperatly for the tag] LM: Man of Steel wants in, but Jones can't tag him. BL: Can't? You mean won't. Casey doesn't want to lose. [Jones takes the offensive with a series of suplexes, then tags in Man of Steel. The Man winds up his hand and the fans count the revolutions 2...3...4...Man of Steel connects with a devestating roundhouse right. Easy is staggered but gets the tag. Both Drifters throw Man of Steel to the ropes, he ducks their double clothesline attempt, and puts Pale in a headlock. He bulldogs the Drifter into the corner and tags in James. Whitebread delivers a double ax-handle to Pale who drops to his knee, groaning and grabbing his neck.] LM: Pale Rider is injured! Casy Jones doesn't know what to do! [Jones gestures questioningly at Pale Rider who writhes on the mat.] LM: Justice and fair play; he can't kick a man who's down. [Jones turns to the crowd, hands held up in confusion. There are screams and suggestions from the crowd. "Whitebread" turns to consult with Man of Steel. Forgotten, Pale Rider quickly wraps up the small package on Casey James. Referee counts 1...2...James kicks out.] LM: Her wasn't injured at all. That low life was just making a fool of James! BL: Which wasn't too hard. LM: He was playing just playing upon Casey's sympathies. BL: It's worked a million times for me. LM: You condone that type of wrestling? BL: Who was talking about wrestling? All's fair in love and war. [Man of Steel tags in and squares off against Pale Rider. Before they can lockup, High Velocity strides to the ring] LM: Looks like High Velocity wants satisfaction from the Drifters. BL: I wouldn't mind getting a little satisfaction from... LM: [Quickly interupting] Look what's happening in the ring! [J.R. Metro climbs slowly into the ring. Pale ignores Man of Steel and faces Metro. Easy and T.R. Rowe both enter. The Referee warns High Velocity away, but Easy Rider pushes him out of the way. The bell rings for the disqualification] LM: They're giving the DQ victory to the Drifters, that isn't right. BL: Why not? It is obvious to everyone else that Casey and the Man asked for their help. [After a momentary staredown the four lock up. Man of Steel and Casey James throw themselves into the fray, pulling the two teams apart. The Drifters, still shouting insults, back their way up the aisle.] LM: Thank goodness, More rational heads have prevailed and restored order. BL: Excuse me, waitress, I'd like to change that order... Deathbringer vs. Blackjack Haley ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ BL: Hmm, a walk through the Valley of the shadow of the Jolly Green Giant. LM: Not any more, Becky. He's now to be known as Blackjack Haley, and he handed me a note just before we came on air tonight. I'll read it out for everyone to hear: "As always, I keep my comments short and sweet. Deathbringer, I'm learning what it takes to win from the best mentors in the business. I don't care about all your mumbo jumbo coffin tricks. Back on the farm, I sliced the heads off cows twice the size of you. So bring it on, Death. You're no stranger here. Sign me, Blackjack Haley, Killer Giant." So there you have it... [Haley walks slowly to the ring, frowning and ignoring the fans. A small boy holds out a 8x10 of Green Giant for a signature, but Haley blows by unnoticing. The boy begins to cry] LM: What a transformation has come over this mountain of a man. He used to be such a gentle giant. BL: Good guys finish last Larry, you're proof of that. LM: How can he turn his back on his fans like this? BL: Fans don't win you belts, The Horsemen do. [On cue Flare and "Bodybag" Kinder walk out of the arch. As Haley climbs into the ring, the Horsemen take seats ringside. The lights go black and there is a huge pop from the fans. Two red eyes appear in the ring, the lights go up, and Deathbringer stands no more than two feet from Haley.] LM: That's just plain unsettling. BL: You get used to it. LM: Deathbringer's entrance? BL: No, men showing up unexpectedly in the dark. LM: Did you hear what you just said!? BL: Of course, you don't think that I was listening to you, did you? [Blackjack clubs down with a forearm. Deathbringer grabs Haley by the throat.] LM: A chokeslam...already...Deathbringer wants to end this early. BL: He can't lift Haley. That man is seven feet tall. [Deathbringer walks his way up the ring ropes, readies for the slam, but Haley hooks his legs and cradles into a suplex. Haley laughs. Blackjack pulls Deathbringer to his feet and sends him for the ride. Haley connects with a boot so solidly that the crowd goes silent. 'Bringer hits the canvas] LM: Deathbringer seems to have other things on his mind. BL: Like Haley's boot? LM: No, like Kaufmann and Latta. [Deathbringer sits up] LM: Did...you...see..that! BL: Oh, I see Cadaver do it all the time. LM: You mean Deathbringer. BL: Only an idiot confuses Deathbringer with Cadaver. [Haley is more than a little suprised. He looks to Flare, but Flare shrugs and looks away.] LM: What do you think about Haley's allies now? BL: It's a perfect example of "Tough Love". You gotta earn the right to be a Horseman. [The two lock up and Haley rams the man from the dark into the corner. The Referee call for a clean break, but Haley delivers a hard right as 'Bringer rakes his eyes. Deathbringer whips Haley to the opposite buckle, and attacks, only to have Blackjack dodge. 'Bringer slams into the post, wobbles and drops. Haley steps up a rope, then splashes down on Deathbringer. Haley stands, proudly pointing a finger to the Horsemen then to himself. The crowd boos, but that turns to cheers as Deathbringer snaps up.] LM: This Jack Haley is a powerhouse, but can nothing keep Deathbringer down? BL: Maybe Cadaver, or Kaufmann, or Latta, or... [Haley is in a rage. He throws Deathbringer against the ropes attempting a running forearm. 'Bringer turns the momentum into a slam as Haley rebounds hard across the ring ropes and back into the ring. Deathbringer throws himself against the ropes: Flying clothesline, and Haley goes down hard.] LM: Whatta maneuver! It was am arm-across-the-throat kind of blow. BL: [Hostile] That. Was. The. Sythe. LM: Yes it was! [Deathbringer attempts a lift into a tombstone but can't get the giant man up, instead he executes a sloppy DDT. 'Bringer kneels across Haley's shoulders 1...2...3! Haley jumps up, but the lights go out. When they return, the Giant is alone in the ring He storms backstage.] BL: As if by magic... LM: Well, a great victory for the Deathbringer there. But not the most successful Horseman debut for Blackjack Haley. Our next match features another debut - as Prince of Darkness takes on the rookie Joe Latta. Let's go backstage and see Latta's final preparations: [Cut to the locker-room. Joe Latta, Dan Kauffman and Brandon Bennett talk to each other, as Carla Daughtery stands by.] KAUFFMAN: All right, Latta. You ready to go full-force? LATTA: YES!!! KAUFFMAN: Who are you facing? LATTA: Prince of Darkness. KAUFFMAN: Who are you taking him as? LATTA: DEATHBRINGER!! KAUFFMAN: Are you ready and focused for this match? LATTA: HELL YES!! KAUFFMAN: Then let's do it! [Latta bursts out of the lockerroom door, with Dan and Brandon following. Cut back to the arena.] LM: Well, Latta _seems_ focused enough. We'll have to see how he puts it together in the ring. Prince of Darkness vs. Joe Latta ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ [There is a blast of dark smoke and Dr. Faustus emerges from the archway.] BL: Now there is a man who knows how to dress. [There is a slow build and Prince of Darkness steps out to a huge heel pop.] LM: They say this man will do anything for a victory. It is said that he gave up his soul for a chance at success. BL: I've had that offer made to me before. RA: Ladies and Gentlemen: Joe Latta! ["You Oughta Know" begins to play, but can barely be heard above the cheer from the crowd. It becomes deafening as Carla Daughtery skips down the aisle.] BL: That cheerleader again? Oh no...that must mean...it's Mr. Coffee! [Joe Latta jogs in confidently. He acknowledges the crowd with a nod, but it is obvious he is about to explode with excitement. Dan Kauffman follows sedately behind, and sits himself down at ringside. Latta rolls into the ring to an even louder pop. Prince of Darkness side-steps over the top rope.] LM: It could be power against power in this match. BL: Do you have any idea what you're talking about? [Latta starts with a belly-to-back suplex] LM: See I'm right, Prince of Darkness is over 300 pounds but Latta lifted him like a rag-doll. BL: Didn't your mother ever tell you it's bad maners to gloat? [Prince of Darkness sweeps a leg sending Latta to the mat. He starts a chokehold but the Referee quickly pulls his hands away. The two square off again, this time Prince of Darkness throws Latta to the ropes. Pop for the Prince of Darkness] LM: Latta is giving up 54 pounds to this man. BL: Which is about as much as Carla Daughtery weighs. [P.O.D. flips Latta with a back body drop. Latta gets to his knees but has lost his breath. The Prince places Lattas head between his knees, signals, then lifts for the piledriver. Heel pop. Latta grabs the legs, blocking the lift. Latta tries to stand, but can't get the big man off his feet. Prince of Darkness lifts Latta for the power bomb but Latta slides out, spins, and catches the man with no soul with a standing drop kick. Huge pop for Latta. Latta follows with a shoulder to the mid-section and they both go through the ropes. Kauffman looks concerned, but doesn't move from his seat.] BL: Maybe Latta hurt himself. LM: What kind of comment was that? BL: I'm just voicing what everyone is thinking. [Referee runs to the ropes. The Prince rolls in, undercutting the ref who falls flat. Dr. Faustus strolls over and stomps on Latta's fingers. The Referee gets up and begins the countout.] LM: That Dr. Faustus, he should be banned from ringside. [Faustus walks away, Latta gives chase. Referee counts ...3... the lights flicker.] LM: What's going on with the lights? Is there a storm outside? If we lose our broadcast signal we'll stay with you as long as we can... [Light go out] BL: Larry, that better not be your hand on my knee... [The lights flicker on, and there is a loud pop as the crowd sees Deathbringer standing at the top of the aisle. Referee recontinues the count ...5...6... Latta sees 'Bringer and immediatly turns his attention from Faustus to Deathbringer.] LM: Carla is screaming for Joe to get back in the ring. She knows he's nearing a countout. BL: She's just screaming to catch Faustus's attention, Armani suits have that effect on a girl. [Latta rushes the aisle, the lights flicker again. There is a brief blast of fog and Deathbringer disappears. Smirking, Latta sheilds his eyes against the non-existant glare, humerously peering into the crowd for Deathbringer. He shrugs his shoulders and slaps hands with a few fans. The count continues ...9...10. Prince of Darkness's hands are raised in victory. Carla sprints to where Latta stands. Kauffman joins them, looking part bewildered, part frustrated. They leave together. "Boogie Man" plays through the coliseum as Faustus coldly escorts his man from the ring.] Robski vs. Billy Shakespeare ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: This should be quite a matchup as a newcomer to the IIWF, and a nasty looking individual he is, takes on a IIWF ring veteran in Billy Shakespeare. BL: Oooh, I just hate it when that Robski guys scrunches his face up and bares his teeth. Don't guys know that some women go for the demure look. Take Billy Shakespeare, for example. Why if he wasn't involved with Moondust . . . . LM: Don't even start that rumor! But speaking of Moondust, we have the original Spaceboy joining us for some commentary during this matchup. ["Hello Spaceboy" begins to play and glittery dust falls from the ceiling of the IIWF Coliseum. Pink lights flood the aisle as Moondust walks toward the broadcast table, blowing kisses to the crowd. He joins Larry and Becky at the broadcast table] LM: Ummmm, welcome Moondust . . . I guess. MD: Well, mister announcer man, as our big, burly IIWF champion man Outlaw always says, the pleasure is yours. [he giggles uncontrollably] But it is certainly a pleasure to share the broadcast with Miss LaRue. Finally, someone who knows what it's like to be chased all day -- and all night -- by the boys. BL: Yeah, but I'm a little more selective about the ones I let catch me. LM: Enough chit-chat ladies [Moondust scowls at Larry], it's time for some wrestling action. [Big heel pop as Robski steps into the spotlight and begins making his way to the ring. The English flag is draped across his body and his face is painted with the cross of St. George. He is pelted with cups and ice as he steps into the ring.] LM: Robski has made quite an impact on these fans already and this match isn't even underway! [The boos quickly turn to cheers as Billy Shakepeare appears at the top of the aisle. He appears focused as he walks to the ring but catches a glimpse of Moondust at the broadcast table and stops. He points his index finger directly at Moondust and says something that the audio does not pick up. Fans around him begin howling with laughter and also point at Moondust] LM: Well, it looks like you have Billy Shakespeare's attention already, Moondust. MD: Wasn't that sweet of Billy? He's dedicating this match to me. I'll have to find some way to . . . ummmmmm . . . thank him later. BL: Hey Larry, would you pass me that bucket? I don't feel so well. [As soon as Shakespeare steps into the ring, he is attacked by Robski. The bell rings as Robski's right leg hits Shakespeare with a low blow. Even Moondust groans at the shot.] MD: Don't you go damaging any goods mister Robski man! LM: I think I need the bucket now, Becky. [Robski hits a vicious knee lift and Shakespeare doubles over. Backed into the corner, Shakespeare is hit repeatedly by Robski's closed fist. Robski chokes him on the ropes, runs his face across the top rope, and raises his arm as if in victory. Big heel pop. He makes an obscene gesture to the crowd and whips Shakespeare into the ropes, delivering a clothesline that flips Shakespeare. He begins to choke his opponent, but is warned by the referee. Robski shoves the ref to the mat.] LM: Whoa! I've got a feeling we're going to be seeing a fine levied by the IIWF front office for that little move. You can't touch the refs in the IIWF! BL: From the looks of the refs in the IIWF, I wouldn't _want_ to touch them. [Moondust giggles again] But Robski was just trying to set up his sleeper hold. MD: Sleeper? Oooooh, that was a Woody Allen film. Can I say Woody on the air, announcer man? LM: I think you just did. MD: Ooooooh. Woody! Woody! Woody! LM: Would you cut that out?! [Robski pulls Shakespeare to his feet and again whips him into the ropes. He attempts a dropkick, but Shakespeare holds onto the ropes and Robski hits the canvas hard. Shakespeare quickly goes to work on Robski, hitting a legdrop, a suplex, and whipping his opponent into the turnbuckle. Big face pop. Shakespeare goes to the second turnbuckle and begins delivering right hands to Robski's head as the fans count the blows. 1-2-3-4 . . . Robski slips to the second rope . . . 5-6-7-8 . . . Robski hits the mat.] LM: Shakespeare is really delivering some stiff blows now! MD: I just looooooove the way you stated that. LM: Please stop that! [Crumpled in the corner, Robski sees another opportunity and delivers another low blow. Again the referee warns him and again Robski shoves the ref into the corner. He turns and spits on Shakespeare. The ref grabs Robski and spins him around, putting his finger in the wrestler's face. As Robski begins to wind up a fist, Shakespeare turns Robski around and delivers a stunning punch of his own. Staggered, Robski drops to the canvas. Shakespeare climbs to the top turnbuckle as the fans go wild.] LM: It looks like Shakespeare is going for the curtain call. If he hits this, even Robski won't get up. MD: Won't get up? My oh my! That would be a pity, wouldn't it? BL: Ummmm Larry, I'm going to the concession stand. Do you want anything? LM: Oh no, you're not getting away that easily! [As Robski slowly gets to his feet, Shakespeare launches himself with a perfectly-timed backflip cross bodyblock. He rolls up Robski: 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] RA: Here is your winner, by pinfall, Billy Shakespeare. LM: What a comeback by Billy Shakespeare. That was certainly impressive. MD: No, _that's_ what I call impressive, announcer man! [Moondust points at Billy's backside as the victorious wrestler takes a bow. Moondust leaps from the table and reaches through the ring ropes, sneaking his hand up Shakespeare's thigh. When Shakespeare realizes what is happening, he leaps over the top rope and chases Moondust up the aisle. Robski slowly recovers and staggers up the aisle.] BL: You know, Larry, I really hate that for Shakespeare, but at least it gets Moondust out of our hair. But what great action in that match, huh? Wow, I feel like stepping back into the ring now. What do you say? Feel like getting your butt kicked, Larry? LM: Please! I'm beginning to see why Tim Dross prefers Steve Roberts as a color commentator. We have another match ready to go right now. Senator vs. Outlaw Josey Wales ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: As you all know, there was quite a controversy at the recent "Saturday Night" when High Velocity and the High Plains Drifters went at each other. [footage of cage match rolls] Before that match was over, Senator and Outlaw Josey Wales got into the action at ringside, with Wales slapping a full nelson on Senator. Tempers flared and these two managers were in the middle of it. BL: Yeah, well tonight these old geezers are going to try to settle their problems in the ring. And there's a 20-minute time limit, so we'd better keep some oxygen handy at ringside. LM: Please, Becky. These men may be aging, but they are both skilled competitors. Our research department has learned that Senator is actually a former champion. And we all know that Josey Wales is billed as the most dangerous man alive. BL: Yeah, now that Liberace is dead. LM Oh please! BL: You can beg all you like, Larry! LM: Well, let's go backstage and get comments from the Senator as he makes his final preparations for this match: [Cut to the locker-room. The Senator, who is dressed in purple wrestling trunks and his famous red boots, is carrying one of his World Titles with him.] The Senator: As you can see my friend, I am returning to the ring tonight not only to kick some butt, I am here to carry on with my winning ways. While wearing this belt I have been undefeated in over 1200 matches. I have held this belt for over 14 years and it means a lot to me. Mr. Wales has put his nose in my business for the last time. Tonight I will take him to task. I have a few surprises in store for him and that includes The Drifters, if they show themselves at ringside. Mr. Wales - prepare for the beating of your life and remember when things look the best for you, the heat will be turned up to a burning.... [The Senator stops in midsentence, and leaves the locker-room. Cut back to the arena. Senator, looking surprisingly fit, comes out first accompanied by High Velocity to a mild face pop. JR Metro and T. Rowe help their manager into the ring and Senator begins to throw a few mock punches into the corner. Scattered boos greet the appearance of "Outlaw" Josey Wales and the High Plains Drifters. All three men have their attention focused squarely on Senator and High Velocity] LM: Say what you will Becky, but I have a feeling we're going to see some great technical maneuvers in this matchup. BL: Uh-huh. Hey Larry, look! The concession stand has hot dogs on special tonight. Can I borrow a few bucks? [As the bell rings, both men circle each other looking for an opening. Senator attempts a leg takedown, but Wales deftly avoids it. The two finally lock up in the middle of the ring and Wales powers Senator into the corner turnbuckle. Wales holds his arm up and points to his bicep. Big heel pop. The two lock up again, with the same result as Senator slams into the turnbuckle. This time, Wales holds up both arms. As he does, Senator rushes and delivers a dropkick that sends Wales flying into the opposite corner, where he hits the turnbuckle hard.] LM: What a move by Senator! He's surely been training hard with High Velocity to turn in a move like that. It looks like Wales has the strength advantage, but Senator may be the better mat technician. BL: Do you want mustard on your 'dogs, Larry? [Senator follows with a fireman's carry takedown and drops his knee across the cowboy's forehead. He drops an elbow on Wales' knee and begins to wrench his opponent's leg. After a kick to the thigh, Senator applies a spinning toe hold. Wales is able to kick Senator away and Senator flies through the ropes to the floor. High Velocity is quickly to his aid.] BL: Hey, that was a pretty good move. LM: Are you convinced now that these two men are still great competitors? BL: How about chili? Do you want chili? [As Senator climbs back to the ring apron, Wales meets him and suplexes Senator over the top rope into the center of the ring. He kneels over Senator and pounds him with several punches. Big heel pop. Senator rolls to the ropes and uses them as leverage to get to his feet. But Wales is waiting and backs Senator into the corner, where he begins to bite Senator's face. The referee breaks them up and Senator holds a hand to his eye.] LM: I'm getting the feeling these two don't really like each other. BL: Yeah, I hear Josey Wales came up with a new move especially for this political moron. It's called the "fillie-buster." It's guaranteed to cause a cow-tastrophe. LM: Oh you're real funny Becky. [Wales and Senator exchange a few more punches before Wales again gains the advantage. He whips Senator into the ropes and floors him with a western lariat. He stomps with both feet right on Senator's midsection. Pulling Senator to his feet, Wales applies a bearhug and Senator immediately howls in pain. After 30 seconds, the referee checks Senator for a submission but gets none. Finally, Senator attempts a last-ditch effort and chops Wales across the back of the neck. Wales releases the hold and the Senator falls to the corner.] LM: High Velocity are over to check on Senator and I don't think they like what they see. He's really taken a beating in there. BL: Yeah, but look at the High Plains Drifters, they're telling Wales to go for the full nelson and put the old coot away. [Wales storms toward Senator, who has spent too much time with High Velocity in the corner. As Wales gets close, Senator throws a fireball in Wales' face and the cowboy hits the mat writhing in pain. The referee calls for the bell as High Velocity and the High Plains Drifters both storm the ring and begin hammering away at each other. The Drifters clear the ring of Metro and T. Rowe, and Easy Rider has cornered Senator. He hoists the older man in a choke slam and powers him to the mat. High Velocity pull Senator through the bottom rope as the Drifters go to check on Wales.] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner by disqualification, "Outlaw" Josey Wales. LM: What the heck was that? I thought if anyone was going to resort to cheating in this match it would be Wales. BL: It looks like Senator has a few tricks up his boys' sleeves. What a shame you haven't been "fired," Larry. [The Drifters have helped Wales from the ring and he holds a towel to his face as Pale and Easy lead him up the aisle to the locker room. The crowd which booed Wales earlier looks on with concern.] Rising Sun Revolution vs. Steamroller (Non-Title Match) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: We've seen some great tag teams in the IIWF so far, but Taylor and Brassow of Steamroller are the ones wearing the championship belts. BL: Yeah, and they'll still be wearing those belts when they leave the coliseum tonight because this is a non-title matchup. You've got to hand it to Dave Alabanese and his men. They find a way to win when they have to. LM: Okay, but why is this a non-title matchup? BL: Because the belts aren't on the line, you moron. Do I have to explain everything to you? [The theme from "Bladerunner" blares over the public address system, setting off cheers from the crowd. Rising Sun Revolution appears and Hiroshi and Ryudo dash to the ring, waving at the crowd. They exchange high-fives in the center of the ring. The mood changes quickly as Elvis Presley's "Steamroller" plays. Dave Albanese steps into the spotlight and holds the IIWF tag belts high for all to see. Taylor and Brassow walk past him on the way to the ring and are soundly booed.] LM: It looks like Rising Sun Revolution will clearly have the crowd behind them in this matchup. BL: That's because these people wouldn't recognize class if they stepped in it. Except for _these_ people, of course [she points to a group of young men wearing "Becky LaRue Fan Club" t-shirts who wave and chant "Becky, Becky" as the camera pans to them.] LM: Yes, well there is no accounting for taste in some people. Let's go up to the ring for this big tag team matchup. [As the bell rings, Ryudo and Taylor open for their respective teams. Taylor attempts to get Ryudo to submit to a test of strength, but the Japanese wrestler twice backs away. As Ryudo charges, Taylor puts him on the mat with an arm drag takedown, but Ryudo is quickly to his feet and arm drags Taylor to the canvas. Both men nod at each other. Taylor whips Ryudo into the ropes but misses a clothesline as Ryudo ducks underneath. On the return, Ryudo floors Taylor with a flying elbow smash. Big face pop. He drags Taylor to his feet and delivers a swinging neckbreaker. He quickly tags in Hiroshi.] LM: Wow, listen to those cheers for Hiroshi. The fans really love this big guy. You know, guys like Brian Lau talk about the disdain Americans have for the Oriental wrestlers, but it sure isn't evident with the Rising Sun Revolution. [Hiroshi leaps over the top rope and comes down hard on Taylor's knee. After several stomps across his opponent's face, Hiroshi runs Taylor's head into the turnbuckle. He quickly scoops up Taylor and follows with a flying powerslam. He hooks Taylor's leg . . . 1 -2 - kickout! Hiroshi smiles at his opponent.] LM: This match was nearly over right there. Hiroshi and Ryudo work so well together, we could be watching the next IIWF tag team champs. BL: Steamroller doesn't have the belts for nothing, Larry. Albanese will get his team going. And what is that big idiot Hiroshi smiling at? [As if on cue, Taylor slides from the ring for a breather. As he whispers to Alabanese at ringside, Hiroshi tags in Ryudo who sails over the top rope toward the two. Albanese pushes Taylor out of the way, but catches the full brunt of Ryudo's blow and is knocked out. Taylor stomps Ryudo, slamming his head into the guard rail and then the ring post. He rolls Ryudo back into the ring and then tags Brassow.] LM: Steamroller has turned the tide in this one. Ryudo may have won the war with Albanese, but he's in danger of losing the war right here. BL: Especially with Brassow the fresh man in the ring. This could get ugly. It's too bad Dave Albanese is out cold and can't see this. [Brassow is punishing Ryudo in the ring. He runs Ryudo's head repeatedly into the turnbuckle. Whipping Ryudo into the ropes twice, he hits a dropkick and then a flying clothesline. Hiroshi stomps on the ring apron and shouts in Japanese as the fans begin chanting "Ri-sing Sun! Ri-sing Sun!" Brassow backs Ryudo into the corner, where both members of Steamroller begin pounding on Ryudo. Taylor tags in and whips Ryudo to the ropes, hitting a frankensteiner. Big heel pop. He hoists the Japanese wrestler onto his shoulders as Brassow climbs to the top turnbuckle.] LM: This isn't Steamroller's normal closing move, but it looks like it could still end Ryudo's career if Brassow hits it. BL: It's definitely not the Steamrollerplex. Whoa, look out! [Brassow leaps hard off the ropes going for a clothesline. At the same time, Ryudo is able to roll backwards off of Taylor's shoulders and Brassow hits his partner hard. Both members of Steamroller are down. Ryudo slowly manages his way to his corner and tags Hiroshi, who lifts Taylor high and hammers him to the mat in a powerdriver. He makes the cover and Ryudo holds Brassow's leg to keep him from making the save. 1 - 2 - 3. Ding! Ding! Ding! Big pop.] RA: Here are your winners by pinfall, Ryudo and Hiroshi, the Rising Sun Revolution. [bigger pop] LM: What teamwork in there! Rising Sun Revolution has just beaten the IIWF tag champs. BL: But the belts weren't one the line, Larry. Albanese and his boys knew they didn't have to worry about leaving without the hardware tonight. LM: Maybe not, but they'd better keep looking over their shoulders because Rising Sun Revolution have proved that they're a team to be reckoned with. They've got to be in the hunt for the straps! [Taylor and Brassow lean against the ring ropes in disbelief as Hiroshi and Ryudo celebrate with the fans at ringside. Cut to the announcers' table. Becky is, as always, showboating for the fans.] LM: Well, that's all the action we have for you tonight. But what action it's been, hey Becky? [Becky doesn't reply. She is now standing and waving at her fans.] LM: [despairingly] I give up. For Becky LaRue, this is Larry Morton saying: thanks for joining us here for IIWF Midweek Mayhem! See you next week! [Cut to a wide-angle shot of the arena. Fireworks erupt in the rafters. Fade] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | Send mail to univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk with the subject lines: | | "send faq" for the FAQ + "send singles" or "send tag" for the | | rosters + "send handlers" for a list of handlers | +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ | IIWF Home: http://users.ox.ac.uk/~univ0322/iiwf/ | +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ | Submit material for the Report to univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+