##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== Midweek Mayhem ----------------------------------------------- LIVE * IIWF Coliseum * 26 June 1996 [Opening graphics give way to shots of the interior of the IIWF Coliseum. Fireworks explode in the rafters, and the colourful lighting casts psychedelic shadows on the screaming fans. Cut to the announcers' table, where Larry Morton and Becky LaRue stand.] LM: Hello everybody, and welcome to IIWF Midweek Mayhem! I'm Larry Morton, and beside me, as always, is the lovely Becky LaRue. We're just three short days away from the greatest wrestling event of all time, IIWF Ring Wars, and what a card we have for you tonight! BL: The monkey's right for a change, folks. Tonight we're going to see The Returners take on High Velocity, Moondust battle Hakiro Matsuoko for the Intercontinental title, Rising Sun Revolution will face Stunt Team USA, and Dan "Flash" Kauffman will battle for his life against Flare. LM: Plus, on top of all that, we'll be hearing from Tony Starks for the first time since his injury four weeks ago, and we'll also have a special interview with the IIWF Champion, the Outlaw. But before all that, let's go to our opening match, as the Man of Steel takes on that despicable hooligan, Robski. Man of Steel vs. Robski ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ["Made in Heaven" begins to play and Man of Steel enters to a phenominal pop. He slaps hands and takes a moment to tousle the hair of a young boy. Casey James enters and escorts him to the ring where he holds MoS's hand up in victory. There is another cheer, as a Red, White and Blue firework explodes in the rafters.] LM: Truth, justice, fairplay, everything that's good. BL: Bet they're a drag at parties. [The music switches to "Keep right on 'till the end of the road" and Robski stomps out to a chorus of boos.] BL: I usually keep my opinions to myself... LM: BL: What was that? LM: Um, nothing. BL: As I was saying: I usually keep my opinions to myself, but I have to admit that I don't like this guy at all. LM: The crowd seems to agree with you. BL: The crowd, what do they know? They like Man of Steel. [Casey James exits as Roski enters. Robski doesn't wait for the bell, but immediatly locks up with Man of Steel. Kick to the midsection, forearm smash and a hiptoss.] BL: Robski and I _do_ agree on one thing, the sooner this match ends, the better. LM: Isn't it early to count out Man of Steel? BL: I never counted him in. [Robski begins a series of stomps to the lower back. Casey James shouts a comment to Robski, who turns from his opponent to the man outside.] LM: Looks like Robski is trying to get between Man of Steel and Casey James. BL: You think Robski is that devious? Do you actually think he's that smart? LM: Well, teamwork is going to mean a lot when he and Fisto Flash team against Man of Steel and Casey James. BL: Is there any chance that both teams could lose? [The Referee warns James against interrfering, and Casey apologizes. Man of Steel taps Robski on the shoulder, who turns in time to receive a solid european uppercut. Robski falls against the ropes, Man of Steel sends him to the other side, then catches him up with a Back Body Drop. Enraged, Robski retaliates, bulldoging Man of Steel and slamming him head first into the ring post. The crowd boos. Again Casey James jumps to the ring, remonstrating, but not interferring. Robski covers, Man of Steel kicks out.] BL: We've got dumb, now here comes dumber! [Fisto Flash saunters ringside. He points at the staggered Man of Steel and shouts to Robski.] LM: I can just make out what he's saying. It sounds like he's taunting Robski over not being able to put Man of Steel down for the count. [Robski drags Man of Steel to his feet. Man of Steel flips him to the mat. With a wave of surrender, Fisto Flash begins to leave the ring area.] LM: I think Fisto Flash is giving up on this match. BL: I beat him to it... ten minutes ago. LM: This match hasn't been going on for ten minutes. BL: And your point is? [Robski immediatly moves to face Fisto Flash, calling for him to watch him destroy Man of Steel. Fisto Flash reluctantly returns. Robo Stone enters ringside. MoS gets Robski into a side headlock, rubbing his knuckles in the scalp to the joy of the crowd. Fisto Flash climbs to the ring, leaning far into the ring to laugh at Robski's plight. Robski throws Man of Steel off against the ropes, and bends for the back body drop. Man of Steel slides on his stomach between Robski's legs, flips, and delivers both feet to Robski's rear. The blow sends Robski across the ring where he collides with Fisto Flash on the outside, Robski's head colliding with Fisto's steel hand where it was resting on the rope. Robski is stunned.] LM: Did you see that? I knew that steel hand would come back to haunt Flash eventually. BL: Come back to haunt him? Were you scared by visions of metal hands as a child Larry? [Robski stands face-to-face with Fisto, yelling insults and alternately pointing at the hand and at his head. Man of Steel seizes the oppotunity to grab Robski.] LM: Man of Steel has Robski for a devastating over the top cradle, flip, slam... BL: Northern Lights Suplex is a lot easier to say. [Man of Steel arches his back, while a suprised and frustrated Robski struggles to get free. Referee slides to the mat and makes the count: 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] RA: Here is your winner, by pinfall: the Man of Steel! [The crowd cheers. The Ref raises Man of Steel's hand, Casey James climbs in the ring and raises the other. Robski makes a direct line to Fisto Flash, shoving him off the apron. Robski lunges, but the ring ropes are in the way. Fisto Flash grabs a water glass from the international announcers table and breaks it with his hand, he hold up the jagged edges menacingly. Robski climbs out of the ring and looks for a weapon of his own. James and Man of Steel make a hasty retreat up the aisle. Robo Stone gets in between the two combatants. He tells Fisto Flash to drop the glass, but is refused. Instead, Flash backs slowly away up the aisle. Robo Stone bars Robski's way until Fisto has completely exited. The two leave ringside.] LM: I'm not sure what this will do for their cohesion as a team. BL: If they work together as well as we do, they're sure to lose. LM: In all sincerity, I think we do pretty well. BL: Easy for you to say, you aren't the one supporting a weak partner. LM: Ahem, we don't have to wrestle at Ring Wars. BL: Oh, but you'd like that, wouldn't you? I know you've thought about it a thousand times Larry. Admit it Larry. LM: Folks, that's IIWF Ring Wars, June 29th... BL: C'mon, admit it. You're evading the question Larry. The Returners vs. High Velocity ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: We haven't seen much of these Returners. And who knows when they'll be back? BL: Huh? LM: Be back...Returners...get it? BL: You aren't paid to be funny. Come to think of it, what are you paid to do? ["Gangsta's Paradise" begins to play as Sabin Figaro and Locke Cole stride out confidently to the ring. The crowd is unfamailiar with them, but cheers anyway.] LM: These two men weigh in at a combined 575 pounds, High Velocity weighs at 715. Combined that's a lot of muscle in the ring. BL: Larry, you can add! That must be what you're paid to do! [As Sabin Fiagro enters the ring, JR Metro and T Rowe, High Velocity, come down the aisle. There is a pop, but there are some intermittant boos which seem to confuse Metro and Rowe. They both enter the ring. Figaro indicates that he'll fight them both at once if that's what they want, but the Ref sends metro out. The match begins with Sabin throwing Rowe against the ropes, and delivering a shoulder which knocks Rowe back a few steps. Figaro locks on an armbar, twisting it until Rowe drops to his knees. Sabin plants a knee on the back of the neck. Rowe rolls out and tags in Metro.] BL: You know I held the Women's tag belts for a time. LM: We're supposed to be calling a match here. This isn't a good time to talk about yourself. BL: It's always a good time to talk about me. LM: Um, the match.. BL: Oh, if we must. Some guy no one cares about is beating on another guy who nobody likes. [Figaro throws the entering Metro against the ropes, but is suprised when the huge man hits him with a cros body block. Both men go down. Metro tags in Rowe. High Velocity lifts figaro into a double verticle suplex. Rowe pushes Figaro into the corner, drives a shoulder to the mid-section, tags in Metro. With Rowe holding, JR delivers a combination of uppercuts until the Ref warns Rowe out.] LM: Now we're looking at teamwork. Robski and Fisto Flash could do to pay attention to this. BL: Why? Have you placed a bet on them to win? [Metro sets for the piledriver, but Figaro executes a sunset flip. Metro breaks the pin but Sabin Figaro gets to his corner for the tag. Locke Cole vaults in, connecting with a flying drop kick which sends Metro to the ropes. Cole catches Metro as he rebounds with a hip toss. Locke stands center ring over the downed half of High Velocity and raises his own fist in victory. There is an isolated cheer, which Cole interprets as being for him, until The High Plains Drifters appear at ringside.] LM: This could be trouble. BL: Could be? Oh honey, this is guaranteed trouble. [Metro sweeps the leg of the gloating Cole. Metro quickly leverages Locke Cole into a kneeling backslide. Referee counts 1..2.. Easy rider reaches into the ring and pulls Coles' legs, breaking the pin. Rowe jumps Easy Rider. A little confused, Cole retreats to his corner and tags in Sabin Figaro. The Ref goes to the ringside where Rowe and Easy are exchanging blows. Pale Rider sneaks in on the opposite side.] LM: Pale Rider has got something in his hand! He's going to use a spur from his boot! BL: Deja vu for me. Ooops, did I say that out loud? [Metro turns as Pale Rider clobbers him with the spur, Pale rolls out of the ring. Metro stumbles to his corner.] LM: Metro wants to make the tag, but T Rowe isn't there. BL: That's because Rowe is currently getting his head beat in by the Drifters. [Sabin is unsure why there hasn't been a DQ, he looks to the ref, but the ref is still trying to seperate Rowe and the Riders. Sabin shrugs his shoulders, tags Cole, then whips the incoherent JR Metro into the ropes. Figaro catches Metro up into a suplex, and Locke Cole finishes 'The Final Return' with a cross body block from the top rope. The Ref hears the slam and turns in time to count the pin: 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] LM: The Returners get the victory, but it's a shallow one. Why can't these other teams stay out of each others matches and let the wrestlers wrestle? BL: If you want clean wrestling Larry, why don't you join one of those e-mail fantasy leagues? I hear there's openings in the IHIW. LM: Maybe I should, I might get some respect there. BL: I doubt it. [The Returners climb out of the ring. The Drifters see them coming and quickly escape up the aisle. T Rowe begins to follow, but goes to the fallen Metro instead. The Drifters stop at the archway. Easy mimics breaking something over his knee, while Pale points at High Velocity. Slowly, Rowe escorts Metro from the ring.] LM: In the past week JR Metro has gone through a table and received a spur to the head. BL: All in a day's work in the IIWF. LM: One can only speculate what this means for High Velocity leading up to Ring Wars. BL: [Obviously overacting] Ring Wars? I've never heard of that Larry, when is it? LM: Well Becky... BL: [interrupting] Geez, you just don't know when to stop, do you, Larry? Anyway, enough of your shameless plugs. Let's get comments now from a guy who'll be returning at Ring Wars from injury - Tony Starks: [SCENE: Tony Starks in the Staten Island gym where he first learned his craft. He has been working out on the machines and working with a sparring partner. With a skillful display he dismisses the sparring partner. He then helps him up and takes time to speak:] "Many of you thought you would never see me again. Well, all of your dreams are about to be shattered. When I faced the Outlaw, I was cool on the outside but, on the inside [shaking his head] it was a different story, I was in a state of hellish chaos. At the end of the Clash, I was brimming with anger. My anger consumed me, I wanted to prove something to everyone. But my anger only hurt myself. My anger took me out of my game, it was my greatest foe. I paid the price to my most challenging adversary. I was defeated and I suffered a very serious injury to my knee. "All that time in the hospital laid up, I had a lot of time to think. I learned I needed to find a new discipline. Well, I found it. I went back to the gym and polished my skills. Now, I am more focused and ready than I have ever been. This is the beginning of a new journey. The first step towards a championship match. I will not be denied again, by anyone, especailly myself." [Fade] LM: You know what, Becky, I think this time off has done Starks some good. BL: Sounds like he's gone soft to me, Larry. And he used to have such a killer instinct. LM: Well, we'll see at Ring Wars - this Saturday night! Call your cable operator now! [Becky glares at Larry.] Er... now it's time for our next matchup. ---------------------------------------- IIWF Intercontinental Championship Match ---------------------------------------- Hakiro Matsuoko vs. Moondust ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: Whether you like him or not -- and I must say that the majority of the fans here in the IIWF Coliseum do -- you've got to respect Hakiro Matsuoko for putting his IIWF Intercontinental Belt on the line tonight against Moondust with just three days to go until Ring Wars. BL: That's right, Larry. Just three more days until Tiger Claw takes the belt from Hakuna Matata, or whatever his name is. LM: That's Hakiro Matsuoko. This is _not_ The Lion King! BL: I don't know about that. Matsuoko kept promising to wrestle Tiger Claw but wouldn't. Doesn't that make him the "Lyin' King?" Bwahahahahaha. . . snort. LM: Ahem. Regardless, Hakiro Matsuoko will indeed meet Tiger Claw this weekend at Ring Wars and I'm sure Becky will be thrilled with our special guests for the next match. Ladies and gentlemen, here are Brian Lau and Tiger Claw. [Lau and Claw arrive to a big heel pop from the crowd. Cups and paper wrappers fly at them from the crowd, but they ignore the audience and walk slowly to the anncouncer's table. Brian Lau puts on a headset and sits down next to Becky LaRue while Tiger Claw stands beside Lau.] LM: Well, Mr. Lau, how are you and Tiger Claw tonight? LAU: Let us get one thing straight, Larry Morton. Our contract says that American announcers will not interview myself or Tiger Claw. Our personal interviewer, Kenny Tanaka, is unavailable tonight, so I will comment when I feel it is necessary. You will not address me. You will not address Tiger Claw. Is that clear? LM: Well, yeah, I guess so. [Larry looks at Becky, who looks at Lau before turning her attenton back to Larry. She shrugs her shoulders and holds up her hands. Morton appears dumbfounded.] BL: Hey Larry, you may want to get this match underway. LM: Huh? Oh. Oh yes! This should be a great matchup fans! Let's go up to the ring for our introductions. RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this match is one fall with a 20-minute time limit for the IIWF Intercontinental Championship. Introducting first, the challenger, from England and weighing in at 275 pounds, he is . . . Mooooooooondust! [Sparkly grey dust falls from the ceiling of the coliseum as Moondust enters to a big heel pop. As he walks the aisle to the ring, one male fan grabs his own crotch and makes a gesture at the wrestler, but quickly backs off when Moondust offers to help him with the gesture. The fans around the man laugh hysterically. Moondust enters the ring and circles the ring announcer, running his hands up and down the man's tuxedo.] RA: And . . . um . . . introducing . . . uh . . . the champion, from Tokyo, Japan and weighing in at 215 pounds, here is the "Angel of the Sun" . . . Hakiiiiiiiiiro Matsuoko! [Big pop as the Coliseum goes dark and the bass from the Japanese drums reverberates throughout the arena. Fireworks explode around the building as Matsuoko, dressed in his elaborate Oriental garb, enters to a single spotlight. A group of young fans extend their arms and pay homage to Matsuoko. Brian Lau and Tiger Claw are seemingly not impressed at ringside.] LM: What an entrance by the Angel of the Sun! LAU: Matsuoko should enjoy his little _show_ while he can. It will be no show Saturday at Ring Wars when Tiger Claw destroys him. BL: Aw jeez, Lau. I was gonna say that. Don't take all my good lines, okay? [Lau stares at her in disbelief.] LM: Don't sweat it, Mr. Lau, you get used to her after awhile. [As the referee calls for the opening bell, Matsuoko circles Moondust warily. Moondust seems to enjoy the attention and begins posing for his opponent. A single-leg takedown snaps Moondust back to reality, but as he gets back to his feet, Moondust saunters over to Matsuoko, the Japanese veteran seems befuddled.] LM: It never fails. Moondust's antics take his opponents out of their game plan. He is certainly one strange customer. BL: Well, he certainly warmed up to you, Larry. Why if you were built like Billy Shakespeare . . . . LM: Cut that out! [Moondust delivers a kick to the midsection and chops away at Matsuoko. A kneelift rocks Matsuoko and Moondust puts him on the mat with a running powerslam. He slaps an armbar on Matsuoko, but then begins running his hands up and down his opponent's body. Matsuoko rolls out of the ring and flashes a look at Tiger Claw, who has not taken his eyes from Matsuoko since the beginning of the match. Matsuoko climbs back to the ring apron, only to encounter another boot to the midsection from Moondust, who then suplexes Matsuoko over the top rope and into the ring. As Matsuoko slowly gets to his feet, Moondust applies a full nelson.] LM: Hakiro Matsuoko is not looking very sharp tonight. Moondust has nearly dominated this match from the opening bell and now has a painful full nelson on the Angel. LAU: Such a performance against Tiger Claw would be fatal. My man is focused on victory like he has never been before. The Intercontinental Championship is finally within his reach Saturday at Ring Wars. BL: There you go again, Lau-meister! I was gonna say that! [Moondust holds the full nelson until Matsuoko swings his leg backward between Moondust's legs. The hold is quickly broken as Morton and LaRue debate whether it was a kick to the inner thigh or something more deadly. As Moondust staggers, Matsuoko floors him with a yakuza kick. He then goes to the top rope and splashes Moondust, then goes for the cover: 1 -2 - kickout! Matsuoko then applies his octopus hold.] LM: The tide has certainly changed in this contest. It seems Moondust's antics only served as a wakeup call for Matsuoko. BL: Ewwwww. Can you imagine Moondust waking you up every morning? Well, you probably could, Larry. [Matsuoko releases the hold and goes back to the top rope, hitting a moonsault. Again he covers: 1 - 2 - kickout! He hoists Moondust up for a slingshot suplex and follows with a legdrop. As Matsuoko bends over his opponent again, Moondust grabs his tights and whips him through the ring ropes. Matsuoko lands at Tiger Claw's feet.] LM: Hey, I don't want any violence down here! BL: Larry, this is a freakin' _wrestling match_!! LAU: There will be no violence unless Matsuoko provokes it. [Sure enough, as Matsuoko gets to his feet, he encounters a staredown with Tiger Claw. The two glare at each other until Matsuoko becomes aware of the referee's count and he jumps back to the ring apron. This time, Moondust is waiting with a shoulder to the midsection and again suplexes Matsuoko over the top rope. He follows with an atomic drop and then a backbreaker. Instead of going for the cover, Moondust strikes several bad Kung Fu poses over Matsuoko, mocking him. He finally drops to the mat and goes for the pin: 1 - 2 - kickout! LM: Moondust wasted too much time with those little karate poses. Had he covered Matsuoko, he would be the new Intercontinental Champion right now. LAU: I do not think that will happen. That spot is reserved for Tiger Claw. [Moondust hits a running powerslam. He then whips his opponent to the corner, but Matsuoko flips over the top rope and falls hard to the floor. Moondust then climbs from the ring and produces some grey dust from his tights, sprinkling it over the motionless form of Matsuoko. After rolling Matsuoko back into the ring, Moondust hits a double underhook piledriver in the center of the ring. He then begins to vogue for the crowd and blows them kisses.] LM: I think Moondust could wait all night to pin Matsuoko now. We're going to have a new Intercontinental champion! LAU: I do not think so. [Lau motions to Tiger Claw, who climbs to the top rope and brings a leg down across Matsuoko's throat. He begins to stomp mercilessly on Matsuoko. As Moondust turns around to see Tiger Claw, he quickly exits the ring as the referee calls for the bell. Tiger Claw ignores Moondust and continues to pound on Matsuoko. Finally, Casey James and Man of Steel fly down the aisle and chase Tiger Claw from the ring.]] LM: What's going on here? RA: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner by disqualification . . . Hakiro Matsuoko! LM: But Matsuoko was clearly about to lose the belt. BL: Yeah, but not to Tiger Claw. Get it Larry? This way, Tiger Claw still gets a title shot at Matsuoko and he gets in a few licks to boot. Pretty sneaky Lau-enbrau! LAU: You should learn, Miss LaRue, that women belong in the kitchen! [Lau gets up and leaves with Tiger Claw.] BL: Did that little weenie just say what I think he did? I'm gonna kick his little Japanese . . . . LM: Easy Becky, we're still on the air! [Moondust walks away shaking his head, indicating to the crowd that the belt should be around his waist. James and Man of Steel help Matsuoko from the ring and back to the dressing room.] Rising Sun Revolution vs. Stunt Team USA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: Now here is a matchup that I've been looking forward to -- two teams that are very evenly matched with great speed, excellent power, and nifty sportsmanship. BL Did you just say . . . nifty? LM: By golly, I think I did. Let's go up to the ring! RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this tag team match is one fall with a 20-minute time limit. Introducing first, from Tampa, Florida and Canyon City, Oregon, at a combined weight of 588 pounds, they are Steve Forget and Ron Fire . . . they are Stunt Team USA! [Good pop as Fire and Forget charge down the aisle and both vault over the top rope and into the ring.] RA: And their opponents, from Japan, at a combined weight of 570 pounds, they are Hiroshi Kasai and Ryudo Kenjinata . . . they are Rising Sun Revolution! [Huge pop as Hiroshi and Ryudo enter to the theme from "Bladerunner." They enjoy the fans' cheers and stroll casually to the ring.] LM: These are two very popular teams here in the IIWF, but Rising Sun Revolution has more to lose, Becky. BL: You got that right. These guys have a title shot with Steamroller at Ring Wars and they're getting in the ring with Stunt Team USA? I always heard that Hiroshi wasn't that bright, but I expected more from Roto Rooter. LM: That's _Ryudo_! BL: Whatever. [Rydudo enters the ring, but Hiroshi stops and smiles at Becky, who gives him a demure grin and a little wave. Hiroshi then enters the ring with a big smile and Ryudo looks at him with a puzzled look. Ryudo decides to open the match against Forget as the bell chimes. The two lock up and Ryudo takes down Forget with an arm drag and keeps him down with an armbar. Forget powers his way to his feet, but is whipped into the ropes and hit with a spinning leg lariat. He is whipped hard into the corner and Ryudo follows with the flying leg scissors. As the two go down, Ryudo holds the leg scissors.] LM: Wow, high-flying action by the Rising Sun Revolution already! BL: You're easily impressed, aren't you? Did your parents ever want children, Larry? [Forget rolls to the ropes and the referee forces Ryudo to break the hold. Forget finally mounts some offense, whipping Ryudo into the ropes and ducking for the backdrop, but Ryudo senses the move and turns it into a swinging neckbreaker. He rushes over the make the tag to Hiroshi, but Forget recovers enough to roll to his own corner and tags in Ron Fire.] LM: This should be interesting. We saw the high fliers and now we'll see the power guys for each team. BL: That Hiroshi is a cutie, don't you think? LM: No comment. BL: I like you with no comment. Try it more often, Larry. [Fire and Hiroshi slug it out in the middle of the ring. Fire gets the best of the exchange and bulldogs Hiroshi. He turns the other way and bulldogs him again. After a whip into the ropes, Fire hits a big flying shoulderblock and goes for the cover: 1 - 2 - kickout! Fire then goes to the top rope for an elbow drop.] BL: This is a big mistake by Fire. He's not the aerial technician on this team remember. [True enough, as Fire is about to deliver the elbow drop, Hiroshi rolls out of the way. Hiroshi then whips Fire into the ropes and hits a superkick. He drops Fire to the mat again with a headbutt and then smiles at Becky LaRue, who counters with another little wave. Hiroshi picks up Fire and powerslams him near the Rising Sun Revolution corner and tags in Ryudo, who flies over the top rope and plants a boot on Fire's forehead. Quick cover: 1 - 2 - big kickout, sending Ryudo through the ropes and to the floor. Fire slowly recovers and makes it to his corner to tag Forget.] LM: That was an important tag for the Stunt Team! Forget is the fresh man and he looks ready to go! [Forget runs around the ring and plants a boot on Ryudo's head before rolling him back into the ring. Forget then goes to the top rope and waits for Ryudo to stagger to his feet before hitting a vicious flying dropkick that knocks Ryudo to the other side of the ring. Forget hits a superplex and then goes back to the top rope. He lands a moonsault and rolls up Ryudo for the cover: 1 - 2 - Hiroshi makes the save with a boot to the neck.] LM: I'm not sure there was any hope for Ryudo had Hiroshi not made that save. BL: I'm not sure there's any hope for you! [Forget tags in Fire and they whip Ryudo to the ropes and set up for the double clothesline. However, Ryudo ducks under and on the return delivers a clothesline to both men. Ryudo rolls to the corner and tags in Hiroshi, who kicks Forget from the ring and lifts Fire into a side slam. Ryudo climbs to the top rope and signals to the crowd.] LM: This is it! The Rising Sun Revolution is going for the Naggnit . . . the Nannig . . . the . . . BL: It's the Naginata Nightmare. And you're supposed to be the broadcaster? [Ryudo leaps from the top ropes and hits the legdrop on Fire as Hiroshi slams the Stunt Teamer. Hiroshi covers: 1 - 2- 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] RA: Here are your winners by pinfall . . . Rising Sun Revolution! [Big pop as Hiroshi and Ryudo allow the referee to raise their arms in victory. Fire rolls from the ring and is joined by Forget as they walk back to the dressing room. They are suddenly passed by the figures of Taylor and Brassow, who race to the ringside area and shout at Rising Sun Revolution.] LM: It looks like Steamroller is ready to take care of the title match tonight! BL: They're too smart for that. They're just playing head games. [Dave Albanese runs to join his men, bringing the IIWF Tag Team belts with him. Taylor and Brassow point to the belts and then to Ryudo and Hiroshi before backing up the aisle. Rising Sun Revolution once again relish the cheers of the crowd before finally leaving the ring.] LM: Well that match _will_ take place Saturday at Ring Wars! And I, for one, can hardly wait for it! Dan "Flash" Kauffman vs. Flare ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ LM: Here are two more key players in Ring Wars, although in Flare's case you have to quadruple the number to account for all of the Horsemen. Flare and Blackjack Haley will be involved in a strap match with the Crippler and the Venusian Death Cell. Dan Kauffman will be in the match of his life against Deathbringer. BL: Yes . . . and it . . . is all . . . available on . . . Ring Wars . . . the IIWF's greatest . . . pay-per-view. Call . . . your cable operator. . . today. Jeez, I wish you wouldn't make me read these promos! LM: But you did it so well! RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this match is one fall with a 30-minute time limit. Introducing first, from Hagerstown, Maryland, weighing in at 230 pounds, he is . . . Dan "Flash" Kauffman! [A loud growl and guitar chords -- quickly followed by loud cheers -- signal the arrival of Dan Kauffman. He emerges from the smoke and immediately begins shaking hands with the fans. The pop continues as he makes his way to the ring and begins testing the ropes.] RA: And his opponent, from McLean Virginia, weighing in at 245 pounds, he is the leader of the Horsemen, he is . . . Flare! [The cheers for Kauffman quickly turn to boos for Flare as Miss Victoria Secret leads Flare, Bodybag Kinder and Blackjack Haley through the smoke. It soon becomes apparent that Flare is wearing a mask like the Crippler's.] LM: What is Flare wearing that for? BL: He's trying to psyche out the Crippler, of course, Larry. I wonder whether that's really one of the Crippler's masks. I bet it smells real bad. [Flare stops in the aisle and "whoos" to the crowd. He is met by a large boo from the fans.] LM: There's no mistaking who the crowd favorite is tonight. BL: Yeah, but nobody makes an entrance like the Horsemen LM: We saw more problems with the Horsemen after "Saturday Night" when the Outlaw and Blackjack Haley almost came to blows in the locker room. And I notice the Outlaw isn't with his colleagues again tonight. BL: He's got a big title defense at Ring Wars. That's understandable. LM: Maybe so, but I still say there's trouble among those four. BL: You've got it wrong, Larry. Those four _are_ trouble . . . for the rest of the IIWF! [Flare enters the ring and removes the mask, throwing it out into the crowd. At the opening bell, Flare and Kauffman circle each other looking for an opening. Kauffman dives for a leg, but Flare steps aside and struts to the opposite corner. Cupping his hands to his mouth, he releases another "Whoooo!" at the crowd and is greeted by a return of the same from several members of the audience. Kauffman looks out into the crowd and also releases a "Whooo!", then struts towards Flare just like the man himself. Flare is clearly upset, and pushes Kauffman into the corner, delivering three backhand chops, which seem to have no effect on Kauffman, who pushes Flare to the mat, and "Whooos!" once more, much to the delight of the crowd.] LM: It seems Kauffman is trying to play mind games with Flare. BL: You don't say, Larry. LM: You never know with Flare whether you're going to get a scientific match or a brawl. BL: You just never know anything! [Kauffman puts Flare back on the mat with a Russian legsweep and applies a chinlock. Victoria Secret begins pounding on the ring apron and screaming in support of Flare. Kauffman breaks the hold and whips Flare into the ropes, setting up for the Lights-Out Clothesline, but Flare holds onto the ropes and slides to the outside where he consults with Bodybag and Haley. Kauffman attempts to meet Flare coming back in the ring, but Flare pulls Kauffman's feet out from under him and slams his leg on the ring post.] LM: Now there was a dirty move. BL: Why do you think they call him the dirtiest player in the game? [Flare takes control of the match by stomping on Kauffman's knee and weakening it for the figure four. He hits an inverted atomic drop and then goes back to work on the knee, wrenching it in different directions before finally dropping his full weight on Kauffman's knee. Flare whips Kauffman into the ropes, but Kauffman leapfrogs him and hits Flare with a big flying foream on the return. He goes for the pin: 1 - kickout!] BL: Kauffman must be crazy to think he could pin Flare that easily! LM: I think Dan Kauffman can do anything he puts his mind to. [Kauffman follows up with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and a top rope superplex that shakes the ring. He goes for the cover again: 1 - 2 - kickout! Flare manages to kick Kauffman's weakened knee, momentarily stunning his opponent. He whips Kauffman to the ropes and hits a big backdrop and follows with a belly-to-back suplex into a bridge. 1 - 2 - kickout! Two more chops do have an effect on Kauffman. A rake of the eyes blinds Kauffman and Flare pulls him to the middle of the ring and goes "Whoooooo!" He applies the figure four leglock. Big heel pop.] LM: Flare has the figure four on Dan Kauffman in the middle of the ring! Can Dan reverse it? BL: Maybe against some people, but Flare is the master of this submission hold. This win belongs to Flare! LM: Kauffman hasn't submitted and I don't think he will. He is one tough . . . wait a minute, what's this? [The Crippler and Venusian Death Cell race down to the ring area and begin battling with Haley and Bodybag. Flare breaks the figure four and goes to the ropes, telling Victoria Secret to move to the other side. This gives Kauffman time to recover and he runs Flare into the ropes, rolling him up in a small package on the return. 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] LM: Kauffman gets the win! What a recovery by Dan Kauffman! BL: Recovery? Kauffman can thank the Crippler and Venusian Death Cell for this win -- although I bet he won't. [Flare rolls outside the ring and joins the battle on the Crippler and VDC, who prudently decide to evacuate the ring area. The Horsemen gather and point at the two as they retreat to the dressing room.] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner by pinfall . . . Dan "Flash" Kauffman! [big pop] LM: Now, Becky, you promise to behave yourself. I've got to go and conduct an interview with the IIWF Champion, the Outlaw. BL: Oh, Larry, I promise! [Larry Morton moves to the interview area, where he is joined by the Outlaw wearing the IIWF World Championship belt. The crowd jeer the champ, who turns and shouts abuse at them.] LM: We're just three short days away from the biggest event in the history of professional wrestling. Of course I'm talking about Ring Wars, where this man, the Outlaw, will tangle with the Subway Psycho [big pop] in the main event. And of course the world title is on the line! [Pop!] MO: Yeah, the title is on the line, Harry, but so are careers. Every time you step into that ring, you put your career in jeopardy and Saturday night at Ring Wars may be even more dangerous. Think about that when you step in the ring with me, Psycho! LM: Uh, the name is Larry. But the fans in the IIWF want to know if the Horsemen are going to interfere in this match. Is Tiger Claw going to seek revenge? What about Mistress Sasha? MO: As far as what the fans want, Gary, I don't care. I want to take care of the Psycho on my own terms -- no outside weapons and no interference. I'll hold up my end of the bargain. Let's see if that gutless Psycho is man enough to do the same. [The crowd erupts as the Subway Psycho charges down the aisle and confronts Larry Morton and the Outlaw in the interview area. The two wrestlers get face-to-face.] LM: Now, wait just a minute. I won't have any of that during this interview or we'll end it right here! MO: Yeah, Morton, maybe we ought to end it right here [rips off his vest and the championship belt and points his index finger at the Psycho]. I think Ring Wars may be too good for someone like the Subway Psycho who blindsides his friends. SP: Hold it right there..."friends?" You're not referring to yourself, are you, cowboy? You were never close to being a friend. I, unlike many of the others here in the IIWF, extended my respect to you. I demand the same! As for "blindsiding," it was you who cast the first stone. I'm just here to throw a bigger one back at you! You got on the wrong train, cowboy. MO: Demand? You're in no position to demand anything, little man! You seem to forget that you don't just ask people to respect you. You have to earn it. I haven't seen anything from you in the IIWF that deserves respect. When you're in the ring, you're in _my_ territory. Forget about casting stones. At Ring Wars, I'll bury you under a boulder. SP: Big talk, big man! This is your train of consequences, and your mouth is writing checks your body can't cash. You want to see what I got? Why wait 'till Ring Wars? Come on, TAKE A SHOT! [Larry Morton jumps out of the way as the Outlaw and Subway Psycho begin exchanging blows. They knock over a podium and destroy the interview set before IIWF security men finally separate the two wrestlers. The Outlaw can be heard shouting as he is pushed to the back.] MO: Ring Wars, Psycho! That's _our_ war! [The Psycho stands and revels in the cheers of the crowd. Cut to Becky, alone at the announcers' table.] BL: Well, Larry did a great job in keeping that under control. I'm afraid that's all we've got time for this week, fans! Don't forget that IIWF Ring Wars - with yours truly on colour commentary - is coming at you this Saturday night. If Larry were here, he'd tell you to call your local cable operator and order now, but you won't catch me making such blatant plugs. [She is rejoined by Larry Morton.] LM: Well, I'm afraid that's all we've go... BL: [interrupting] I've done that bit, Larry! Just say goodnight, will you? LM: Er... goodnight, everybody! See you on Saturday at IIWF Ring Wars! [Cut back to the Subway Psycho, still posing for the crowd. Fade] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | Send mail to iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk with the subject lines: | | "send faq" for the FAQ + "send singles" or "send tag" for the | | rosters + "send handlers" for a list of handlers | +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ | IIWF Home: http://users.ox.ac.uk/~univ0322/iiwf/ | +----------------------------------------------------------------------+ | Submit material for the Report to iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+