##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== M + I + D + W + E + E + K M + A + Y + H + E + M ----------------------------------------------- LIVE * IIWF Coliseum * 28 August 1996 [Opening graphics fade through to interior shots of the capacity crowd packing the IIWF Coliseum. Fireworks explode in the rafters as the shot pans down past screaming fans, who almost fall over one another to get on camera, to the broadcast table, at which stand Larry Morton, Tim Dross and Becky LaRue.] LM: Welcome everybody to another dose of IIWF Midweek Mayhem! We are _live_ here in the IIWF Coliseum, and what a show we have for you tonight! I'm Larry Morton, and with me as always is the lovely Becky LaRue. The gentleman on my right is, of course, Tim Dross. Good to have you here, Tim. TD: Thanks, Larry. I'm here to get words with some of the IIWF superstars tonight. Later on, I'll be interviewing both Fisto Flash and the newcomer, "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley. BL: Kauffman mark two, more like. LM: Now now, Becky. And we've got all kinds of action coming your way in the ring here tonight! We'll see the people's champion, the Subway Psycho, in action in tonight's main event as he takes on "Painbringer" Billy Sexton. Sexton's really been climbing the rankings here in the IIWF recently, Becky. BL: He's a talented guy who knows how to get what he wants. And from what I hear, he wants gold. LM: A victory over the Psycho would certainly take him several steps nearer to a shot at the Intercontinental Championship, currently held by Tiger Claw, who'll be in action going after a second title here tonight. Brian Lau's main man will be facing Crimson Storm in first round Cruiserweight Championship Tournament action, and in the other of tonight's tournament matches, Pale Rider and the Man Of Steel will go at it. Neither of those two guys had a particularly good weekend, Tim. TD: Emphatically not, Larry, but you can bet that both men are chasing that new Cruiserweight title for all they're worth. What an honour to be the first name engraved on that belt. BL: I don't know what all the fuss is about. I mean, I can see why you should give all the runts a toy to play with, but a whole tournament just for the little guys?! We need to see more of the IIWF's real men in action. LM: Well, if it's real men you're looking for, Becky, we'll be seeing Joe Latta and the Crippler square off later on tonight. TD: The Crippler's been kind of quiet recently, Larry. I hope that nasty psychological disorder he was suffering from a few weeks back isn't affecting him again. LM: One of the IIWF's most promising newcomers, the "Enigma" Takezo Musashi, will face one of its most highly-regarded established stars as he battles "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare in what promises to be a high-flying, high-speed encounter. BL: [mocking] Wowee, I can hardly wait. At least we'll see some beef in the ring when the Steele twins, Heavy Metal, take on the Final Truth. And the truth of it is, this could well be the final time we have to put up with this paranoid nonsense. LM: I believe the term is revisionist history, Becky. BL: I believe you're a snivelling little worm, Larry. LM: Well, gee, I love you too. Sadly, folks, we won't be seeing Robski in action tonight, due to the terrible injury that appears to have ended his wrestling career. However, in order to fulfill his contractual obligations, he must appear in the arena tonight to concede his match to scheduled opponent "Nuclear" John Bomber. TD: Much as I dislike Robski, Larry, it's always a tragedy when a promising career is ended by injury. Following so closely on the heels of Tony Starks' awful accident, this is a real blow. BL: And unlike Starks, Robski had style. LM: Er... you _could_ say that, Becky. Anyhow, all that great action is coming up later tonight! But first, let's run down the matches we've already seen before we came on air: - BRAD "BODYBAG" KINDER put the PUNSTER away in a hard-fought match. Clearly, Mr. Kinder isn't feeling too happy with the way his performances have been going recently. Kinder wasn't in the mood to enjoy the Punster's good-humoured antics, and he put the trickster away with his Dead Man's Honor piledriver after around twelve minutes. - SIMON LEBEC scored a surprising victory over THE SANDMAN... although the interference of Joe Latta may have been a deciding factor. Lebec will be just as unhappy with the way things turned out as the Sandman, since he appeared to have bounced back well from his narrow defeat at the hands of Hakiro Matsuoko last Saturday, and was holding his own against the powerful and technically-gifted Sandman. However, when Latta arrived on the scene, the Sandman appeared to be distracted, and when the Sandman tumbled from the ring, Latta took advantage and hit his Shotgun Suplex on the floor outside before rolling the Sandman back into the ring where Lebec applied his Antagonist submission hold. The Sandman had to submit, and you can bet he'll be steamed going into his match this Saturday night with the Syndicate's wonder boy. - Newcomer "BADBOY" RANDY ACORN really upset the crowd here tonight as he made his debut. Not only did he grab the microphone and verbally abuse the great fans here in the Coliseum, but he even pushed one kid back into his seat on his way to the ring. He finished off his display by forcing the MASKED MARAUDER to submit to his Newark Knife, a modified Texas Cloverleaf. I don't like this "Badboy" at all, Becky. BL: You wouldn't, Larry. This guy is a great grappler, and he knows it. What's the matter with that? TD: He's arrogant, and somewhere in the not too distant future, somebody's going to take him down a peg or two. I guarantee it. LM: In other action: - Two more newcomers, OTTO "THE BUTCHER" VERHOEVEN and MARTY WARNETT, squared off, and it was the dangerous Butcher who came out on top. Verhoeven dominated Warnett, stopping Marty's high-speed attacks in their tracks and slowing the match to his own methodical pace. He removed the speed advantage by knocking the wind out of Warnett with some vicious body blows. Verhoeven eventually scored the win with his Meat Hook chokeslam from the second rope. Verhoeven's a very dangerous competitor, Tim. TD: You're right there, Larry. Not only is he very dominating in the ring, and very hard to take out of his rhythm, but bringing his fiancee, Nurse Heidi, to the ring undeniably creates another... er... shall we say, distraction? BL: Humph. She bleaches her hair. And that spray-on dress she wears ought to be outlawed. LM: Moving on: - THE HANGMAN scored a victory over the PHANTOM, sending out a clear message to Fisto Flash. Phantom put up a strong defence, but in the end, the Hangman's high-powered assault was too much for the Knight, and the Hangman finished the job with the Scaffold belly-to-belly superplex for the pinfall. Fisto Flash came to ringside after the match, but he stayed in the aisle. Perhaps he was intimidated by the huge Hangman, Tim? TD: If he was, you could certainly see why, Larry; the Hangman's a very big, intimidating opponent. However, Fisto Flash isn't afraid of any man here in the IIWF. I think his plan was simply to be seen, so that the Hangman doesn't forget about him... LM: And, as promised, the Senator was indeed at ringside tonight. What do you think about the situation in the Senate right now? TD: Well, I'm not going to speculate any further, after the threats made by the Hangman yesterday. Fisto Flash may not be afraid of the Hangman, but I certainly am. BL: Aww, poor widdle Timmy. The Hangman and Fisto Flash aren't safe to have around right now. Both men just go nuts whenever they're in the same arena. Didn't you say that you're interviewing Fisto Flash out here later on tonight, Timmy? TD: Er... yes. BL: Good luck. [giggles] TD: Right... I'm going backstage. [Dross leaves the announcers' table.] LM: Let's go up to the ring for tonight's first live match. =============================== The Final Truth vs. Heavy Metal =============================== [Sparkplug Lee steps into the ring while a small group of fans at ringside pop hugely, chanting "Spark - plug! Spark - plug!" Sparkplug notices them, and quickly flexes his arms, which makes the small group go nuts.] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this following match is a teg team bout scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, at a combined weight of 565 pounds, here are Sabin Rene Figaro, Bob "Illuminiti" Hansen: The Fiiiiinallll Truuuuuuuth! [The two members of Final Truth walk down to the ring to a moderate pop.] LM: Well, this is our first chance to see Figaro's new partner in tag action after the mysterious disbanding of the Returners. BL: Any chance of these guys disbanding any time soon? LM: Come on, Becky... BL: Shut up, Larry. Heavy Metal's coming. I'm interested to see these guys. RA: Their opponents, at a combined weight of 660 pounds, accompanied by their manager, Robo Stone, here are Apollo and Atlas Steele: Heaaaaaavyyyy Meeeeeetallllll! ["Smells Like Teen Spirit" begins to blare from the speakers as Robo leads his men down to the ring. Both Atlas and Apollo strike poses for the crowd, displaying the merits of spending too much time in the gym.] LM: Look at these monsters... BL: Monsters? They're just misunderstood, Larry. [The smaller men of each team decide to start as the bell rings. Bob and Atlas measure each other up with a few collar and elbows, each time resulting in Bob getting thrown to the mat. Each time, Atlas poses to the fans. When Atlas turns his back on Bob for the third time, Bob drop kicks Atlas in the back of the head. Bob then sets Atlas up for an Irish Whip that is reversed, and Atlas hits with a knee to the gut. Atlas tags in Apollo, who drops a knee onto the prone Hansen. He picks Hansen up and slams him to the mat with authority. Apollo then drags Hansen over to his corner and forces him to tag in Figaro.] LM: Heavy Metal are sure dominating this match, Becky. BL: Speaking of dominating... LM: [interrupting] Wow! Look at that! [Figaro springs over the top rope feet first, catching Apollo with one foot which staggers the big man. Figaro rattles Apollo with a series of punches and then tries to pick him up. Figaro fails, giving Apollo the chance to retaliate. Apollo rains crushing forearm blows on Figaro's back. Figaro goes down, but the big man just keeps pounding. Once Figaro stops moving, Apollo rushes Bob Hansen with a clothesline that sends Hansen off the Apron. Apollo goes and tags in Atlas. They both pick Figaro up and hoist him onto their shoulders.] LM: What are they up to? BL: They call it the "Olympic Slam," Larry. Isn't research of the IIWF's talent part of your job description? [Apollo and Atlas simultaneously jump forward, powerslamming Figaro to the mat as Robo Stone stands near Bob Hansen laughing and pointing. Atlas goes for the cover... 1 - 2 - Hansen makes a futile attempt to make the save - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] LM: Oh, my! Can you imagine two big guys like that taking you down and landing on you like that? BL: Actually, Larry, now that you mention it... RA: Here are your winners, as a result of a pinfall: Heavy Metal! LM: What an impressive debut by Robo Stone's new talent, Heavy Metal. BL: There's a lot better competition than these two paranoics in the IIWF, Larry... LM: But these guys won with a clean pin. That's a lot more than many other teams can say... BL: Yeah, just think about what they could accomplish if they cheated! LM: [sighs] Let's move on. Robski was originally scheduled to face "Nuclear" John Bomber up next, but due to his apparently career- ending neck injury, he's not going to be in the match. However, the IIWF President ruled that in order to be released from his contract, Robski has to come to the Coliseum tonight and publicly concede the match to Bomber, thus honouring his commitments. BL: I suppose ol' Dictator Dan thinks that's some kind of revenge. We know it's eating him up that he couldn't get Robski out of the IIWF over that illegal arms scandal, so now that misfortune has struck Robski down, he's going to try and embarrass him. LM: You're way off the mark there, Becky. President Dan wouldn't want to embarrass somebody who's suffered such a serious injury. BL: Wouldn't he! LM: Well, let's go up to the ring. ================================ Robski vs. "Nuclear" John Bomber ================================ [Tim Dross enters the ring.] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, would you please welcome at this time, from Birmingham, England, the injured English Sensation: Robski! [Robski walks down to the ring on his own, his neck in a brace, unusually calm and quiet. He gingerly enters the ring and stands in a corner.] LM: This is definately a calmer Robski than we're used to seeing, Becky. BL: Maybe Haley beat him so hard his personality changed... he does look kind of sick with that brace on. TD: As we all know, Robski has been ordered to publicly forfeit this match to his opponent in order to fulfill his contractual obligations. Would you please welcome his opponent now: from Three Mile Island, here is the one and only: "Nuclear" John Bomber! [A siren sounds, and then an explosion. "Juke Joint Jezebel" begins to play, but there's no John Bomber. The fans begin to wonder what has happened to the wrestler. The music stops, and Tim Dross looks over to Robski. Robski just shrugs his shoulders and continues to contemplate his manicure. Dross gets the official over to figure out what to do.] BL: Hmpf... John Bomber didn't feel like showing up? LM: I don't know. I find it hard to believe that any IIWF star would pull a no-show... I... Hold on, we're getting a word from the ring. TD: Well, this is a turn-around, folks. The official has informed me that if John Bomber doesn't come to the ring immediately, then _he_ will forfeit the match by default. [The crowd murmurs as John Bomber suddenly continues to not show up. The official walks over to Robski, asking what's going on. Robski looks innocently and shakes his head, claiming to know nothing about it.] LM: This is strange. I've never... Wait a minute, there's a camera crew in the locker room area that has something important to show us... Let's take a look. [Shot switches to a camera crew running down a hallway to John Bomber's locker room. Inside, a commotion can be heard from a locker, sealed shut with a large padlock. A janitor enters the scene with a large pair of bolt cutters, and cuts open the lock. Someone opens the door to see a battered and bruised Bomber tied up with an American flag shoved down his throat. One of the camera crew's men unties Bomber and removes the flag, at which point, Bomber exclaims, "That bastard jumped me from behind!" Bomber runs out of the room.] LM: Oh my god... I think it's pretty obvious who did that! BL: I'm not so sure, Larry. LM: What do you mean?! It was obviously Robski! BL: For one thing, Larry, Robski's _injured_. But even if he weren't, it couldn't be Robski. If it were, he wouldn't have shoved the flag down the guy's throat... He would have shoved it up his... LM: [interrupting] Okay! Looks like we're getting a decision here! TD: Due to the no-show of John Bomber, this match will be awarded to Robski! [Roski does a little victory dance, grabs his crotch and waves his index and middle fingers at everyone in the crowd. The crowd's jeers are loud, but somewhat disappointed due to the lack of Robski's humiliation.] BL: You've got to hand it to Robski, Larry. He was supposed to be the one who was humiliated here, but he's come out of it smelling of roses. [Suddenly, John Bomber comes out of the backstage area shouting threats at Robski. Security personnel hold him back, and Robski stands in the ring saying "What? What did I do?" Bomber finally bursts past the security personnel and dashes into the ring. Robski cowers in the ring, and points at his neck brace. Dross dives through the ropes back to ringside.] LM: If Bomber touches Robski, he could kill him! [Bomber eventually calms himself, and turns to get from the ring, at which point Robski attacks him from behind. The crowd gives a shocked pop as Robski tears his neck brace off and begins headbutting Bomber.] LM: Wha -- but -- the doctors... the hospital! The neck injury... BL: I love it! It was all a ruse by Robski! He was faking the injury all along! Look at him go! [Robski powerbombs Bomber in the centre of the ring before kicking him in the ribs a few times and heading back up the aisle, laughing his head off. The crowd give a huge heel pop as Robski turns back to the ring and raises both arms. He disappears back into the locker room area.] LM: What a cheap attack by Robski! BL: Well, like I said before, he's got style... LM: That was disgusting... BL: Disgusting to you is a great tactical manoeuvre to the rest of us. Deal with it. LM: I guess that means Robski's not retiring after all. BL: No kidding, Sherlock. ================================================= IIWF Cruiserweight Championship Tournament Match: Man Of Steel vs. Pale Rider ================================================= LM: This should be a good match. Both men coming off some angering losses on Saturday. BL: But Pale Rider didn't get the snot beat out of him like Man of Steel did. Casey really took it to the squealer. LM: But Pale Rider's coming off the back of a title loss. That can't be good for his concentration. BL: Well, that's the thing, Larry. You've never had a case of gold fever. Pale may just have that. [Sparkplug Lee bounds to the centre of the ring.] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this match is part of the opening round of the IIWF Cruiserweight Championship Tournament, and is scheduled for one fall with a fifteen minute time limit. Introducing first, weighing in at 227lbs, here is the Man Of Steeeeel! ["Made in Heaven" plays over the speakers and the crowd gives a big pop large as Man of Steel walks down to the ring. He has a few bruises on his face, what appears to be a split lip, and some nasty marks around his throat. One kid in the crowd holds a sign with Man of Steel and Casey James photos on it with the caption "Who would you trust?" Man of Steel walks over and shakes his hand, then bounds to the ring, hi-fiving fans on the way.] LM: Man of Steel's looking pretty rough tonight. BL: You would be too if I told Casey you called him a snot-bag... LM: What!? I did no such thing! BL: My word over yours, Larry... RA: Introducing his opponent, one half of the High Plains Drifters, accompanied by manager, Josey Wales, Paaale Riiiiiiderrrrr! [Big heel pop as he theme from "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly" begins to play as Pale Rider runs toward the ring with Josey slowly following behind. Pale hits the ring and attacks Man of Steel from behind. Man of Steel is punched down to one knee, and Pale comes off the ropes with a flying forearm. Heel pop. MOS goes down hard. Pale drops a leg across Steel's throat and locks in a side headlock. MOS gets to his feet slowly as the crowd chants "U.S.A!" He throws Pale into the ropes, setting up for a shoulderblock on the rebound. Pale slides between Steel's legs, and quickly executes a bulldog to a sizable heel pop. MOS takes the full impact on his head.] LM: Well, you were right, Becky. Pale seems to be more inspired to win this match after losing the tag belts. BL: It's simple. With a title comes more money, respect, and power. Who wouldn't want it? [Pale looks to the crowd yelling "How does your American Hero look now?" The crowd jeers him as he turns back to MOS. Steel quickly drives a shoulder into Pale's midsection, and then follows up with a series of uppercuts. He then bounds off the ropes with a beautiful flying clothesline. Pale goes down, and MOS goes for a side headlock and drags Pale to his feet. Pale throws MOS into the ropes and dodges a clothesline. Pale then executes a flying head scissors, taking MOS down with authority. Josey then gets up to the apron and begins arguing with the official. While the official is distracted, Easy Rider runs to ringside. Easy picks up Steel and holds him while Pale goes to the top rope, signalling for the Hang 'Em High clothesline. The crowd beginds yelling at the referee to turn around when Steel suddenly breaks Easy's grip and shoves him over the top rope, causing Pale to lose his balance. MOS quickly goes to the top rope where Pale tries to regain his balance, and turns the situation to the Doomsday Powerbomb. The impact of Pale hitting the canvas echoes through the arena, as does the huge pop from the crowd. The ref turns to see MOS covering Pale Rider, and begins the count. 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] RA: The winner of this matchup, by pinfall: the Man of Steel! LM: Yes! Man of Steel advances to the next round of the tournament! [Man of Steel gets his hand raised as Josey and the High Plains Drifters make naughty gestures at Steel. They walk back up the isle as The American Flag comes up on the video wall. MOS salutes it and makes his way back to his dressing room.] BL: But think about it, Larry. He gets to face the winner of the Tiger Claw/Crimson Storm match. Odds are on Tiger Claw, and we all know which of Tiger Claw's stablemates is most interested in Man of Steel... LM: Be that as it may, but I honestly think that truth, justice, and the American way will prevail! BL: You know, Larry, your optimism makes me want to barf sometimes... LM: There's nothing wrong with having a hero, Becky. BL: No, but there is something wrong with having a guy who wears his underwear on the outside of his clothes as your hero. LM: Lighten up, Becky. BL: Make me. I dare you. LM: Er... that's okay. Now would probably be a good time to go over to Tim Dross, who is awaiting the presence of one "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley, another hopeful in the Cruiserweight Tournament. [Tim Dross is standing on a platform, positioned off the aisle.] TD: Ladies and gentlemen, at this time it is my pleasure to welcome one of the IIWF's most highly-touted newcomers. He is: "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley! ["For Those About to Rock" by AC/DC starts up and the crowd responds with a huge pop as Quigley comes out wearing his black and silver wrestling attire, along with silver wire rimmed shades and a leather jacket bearing the Quickstrike symbol. Quigley hops up on the platform as lasers flash the Quickstrike symbol on the aisleway as he walks down...] QUICKSTRIKE ______ / _ _ \ / / \/ \ \ | \_/\_/ | \ /\ / |______| |||||||| ________ |______| ________ /_____ /______ ______\ _____\ /______ /__\ ______\ _____/ ____ \_____ \______\ /_______/ CHRIS QUIGLEY TD: Well, Chris, first off, I'd like to officially welcome you to the IIWF. Many of these fans no doubt recognise you from some of the other federations in which you compete. Right now you are the current SWA World Champion, the current TAEWF North American champion, and have a shot at the FWLI North American title at the next Hardcore PPV. And yet, at the request of a friend, you have entered the IIWF. What's your take on this federation? CQ: Like I said earlier on, the IIWF has really impressed me with the way it's run. From the suits in the head offices to the officials in the ring, it's a top notch organization. I look around and notice that it lacks the "big names" of wrestling these days like Todd Newkirk, Mark Bagwell, or Mark Engel, but then you see guys like Dan Kauffman or even The Outlaw, and realize that just because they aren't as well known, doesn't mean they aren't as good. But I think this is the start of something really big for the IIWF. Without sounding conceited... where I go... people tend to follow. You may see an influx of talent in the IIWF in the near future. It's a great federation, and deserves world class recognition, and once I win the Cruiserweight title, and can represent this federation proudly wherever I compete, the word will get around... the IIWF is HOT! [Crowd pop] TD: You mentioned The Outlaw... you were involved in a real scuffle with him and a few of his pals, when they attempted to injure Ned Norton. One name that comes to mind is Brad "Bodybag" Kinder. He was the first one to attack you when you showed up... from behind, no less. CQ: Yeah, Kinder, don't think for a second I didn't realize who nailed me from behind. I always know where I am and I always make sure I see what happens and how it happened. Kinder, I'm gonna kick your a$$! I don't know when...but I DO know how! And you're gonna find out that when you mess with the best...you fall like the rest! TD: The big Cruiserweight tournament is ongoing, and you meet Takezo Musashi in the first round. Any thoughts on that? CQ: Some of the most exciting and competitive matches I've had have been against grapplers from the Orient. I fought former WIWF World Champion Akira Hashimoto to a bloody end at the last WIWF card, March Madness. If not for outside interference from my former friend Zack Malone, I had Hashimoto beaten. But Hashimoto is quite possibly the BEST wrestler to ever come out of the Orient, and I handled him just fine, I think Mushashi has bitten off more than he can chew, in "Quickstrike" and he had better get ready to go down HARD! You talk about technical wrestling... mat wrestling... stamina... I'm the best there is! And I'm gonna prove it against Musashi and I'm gonna prove it against anybody else who tries to get in my face! And that includes Dan Kauffman! You're the closest thing I have to an ally, Kauffman, but you realize that the grand prize means every man for himself, and if I have to get medieval on YOU...so be it! To be the best...you gotta beat the best...NO MATTER WHO THEY ARE. I live by that, and I may die by that, but the fact remains that the whole reason I got into wrestling in the first place was to show the world that I was the best. I've done it in the TAEWF, the WIWF, the SWA, the FWLI, and countless other feds, and I'm gonna do it here, whether the rest of the IIWF likes it or NOT! [Crowd pops as "For Those About to Rock" starts back up and Quigley hops off the platform. He slaps a few hands and signs a few posters on his way back to the locker room area. Cut back to the announcers' table.] BL: [mocking] "Without wishing to sound conceited... I'm the best wrestler the world's ever seen." Quigley's sure full of himself, isn't he, Larry? But he's going to have it kicked out of him if he steps in the ring with my man Brad. LM: We'll see about that, Becky. There's no denying Quigley's credentials... although whether he has what it takes to make it in the toughest league of them all remains to be seen. Kinder would certainly be a big test, but he's got to get through the Enigma first. Anyhow, let's get back up to the ring for tonight's second tournament match. ================================================= IIWF Cruiserweight Championship Tournament Match: Tiger Claw vs. Crimson Storm ================================================= LM: I'm looking forward to this matchup, Becky. Tiger Claw has established himself as one of the most punishing wrestlers in the IIWF, but Crimson Storm was very impressive at Midsummer Madness. BL: Yeah, whatever. You think there is still time for me to get in this Cruiserweight Championship Tournament? I think I could still take some of the runts in this tournament? LM: But you'd have to be under 240 pounds and I don't think... mpppppph! That... elbow... really... hurts, Becky. BL: Speaking of runts, let's go up to Sparkplug Lee for our introductions. [Sparkplug hears the comment and shoots Becky a dirty look before raising the microphone.] SL: This is a first-round contest in the IIWF Cruiserweight Championship Tournament. Introducing first, from parts unknown, weighing 240 pounds, he is... Crimmmmmson Storrrrrm! [Good pop for Crimson Storm as fireworks pop around the arena. He hi-fives the fans as the trots to the ring and vaults over the top rop. The pyrotechnics in the ring posts erupt with showers of sparks, as the fans continue to cheer.] BL: It's a good thing Timmy Dross doesn't sit this close to the fireworks or his toupee might go up in flames. Wouldn't that be funny, Larry? LM: Elbow.... hurts.... [The spotlight again falls on Sparkplug Lee] SL: And his opponent, hailing from Thailand, weighing 220 pounds and accompanied to the ring by Brian Lau, he is the reigning IIWF Intercontinental Champion, he is... Tigerrrrrr Claw! [Big heel pop for Lau and Claw as they enter the coliseum to the Thai boxing music. They both ignore the fans as Claw gets some last-minute instructions from Lau. Claw enters the ring and disrobes, casting a steel glare on Crimson Storm. The referee calls for the opening bell: Ding! Ding!] BL: It should be interesting to see how Lau plans to handle this cruiserweight tournament because Hakiro Matsuoko, also a member of the Syndicate, is also in the tournament. Claw already has a belt, but would be lose on purpose just so he wouldn't have to meet Hakiro again? LM: Those... two. Gasp. Those two have had... some great battles in the... past. It would be interesting to see... how Hakiro and Tiger Claw would match up now. BL: Feeling better now, Larrykins? [Tiger Claw opens the match on the attack, but Crimson Storm fends off a flurry of punches and kicks. Crimson Storm gains the advantage with a mafia kick between the flurries and uses his quickness to keep Tiger Claw off balance. Storm hits a frankensteiner and power slams Claw, then goes to the top rope before Claw revives and quickly slides from the ring to consult with Lau. Storm considers leaping on the two at ringside, but the referee calls him back into the ring.] LM: Tiger Claw has been taken out of his rhythm by Crimson Storm. I've noticed that Claw seems to perform better again bigger men who are not used to his quickness. He may experience some problems in this cruiserweight tournament. BL: Whatever you say, Larry. But I still prefer the heavyweights of the IIWF... like Brad Kinder. I've always thought that bigger was better. [Tiger Claw, after consulting with Lau, seems to go on the defensive against Crimson Storm, who takes advantage by unleashing an offensive flurry of his own -- including a dropkick and a dragon suplex -- that wears down Tiger Claw. As he is weakening, Claw catches Crimson Storm with a back heel kick, but Storm is still too fresh and quickly retaliates with another dropkick that sends Claw into the ropes. As Claw leans over the top rope getting advices from Lau, Storm launches himself toward the ropes, catching Tiger Claw in a leg scissors and snapping him over the top rope and to the floor. Big pop.] LM: What a move by Crimson Storm! That could break a man's neck! Is Claw okay? BL: Hey, I'll admit that move was impressive, but he never would have gotten it on someone like Brad. Besides he's on the outside now and that's where Lau is . . . [As if on cue, Brian Lau plants a kick into Crimson Storm's ribcage outside the ring, which gives Tiger Claw time to recover. Claw slides back into the ring and draws the referee's attention as Lau kicks Storm repeatedly before backing away. The referee begins his count on Storm and reaches 7 before the masked man slowly rolls under the bottom rope and into the ring. There is a big heel pop in the coliseum as Tiger Claw begins attacking Crimson Storm with a series of punches, but it is soon evident that the crowd is not booing Claw.] LM: Hey, Blackjack Haley is making his way to the ring! What does he want in this match? BL: It obviously isn't the IIWF Runt Championship. That is... ooooh... a lotta man there. LM: Becky, please put your hormones in neutral! [Blackjack Haley stands and watches Claw pick apart Crimson Storm with punches followed by kicks. He goes to the top rope for an elbow smash, but Storm is just able to roll out of the way. Both men are battered and get to their feet at the same time, but Storm kicks Claw in the midsection. As the champion doubles over, Storm bounces to the ropes but Haley catches his legs out of the referee's sight and sends Storm to the mat. Big heel pop as Haley walks from ringside and back to the dressing room. Claw sees Storm on the mat and quickly incapacitates his opponent with an elbow smash and his punching fury. As Storm lays in the middle of the ring, Claw climbs to the top rope and delivers his Golden Tiger Strike, driving his knee into Crimson Storm's head. The cover: 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding! Tiger Claw raises his arm in victory before adding a few final kicks to Crimson Storm's ribs and leaving to celebrate with Lau.] LM: There is another example of Blackjack Haley showing his true colors! I'm sure the Syndicate has not heard the last of Crimson Storm. BL: Are we finished with the IIWF Runt Championship matches for tonight? LM: I wish you'd stop calling it that! But yes, that's tonight's last Tournament match finished. Let's go back up to the ring for our next encounter. ========================== The Crippler vs. Joe Latta ========================== LM: We've got the brawling style of Joe Latta against the mat technician The Crippler in this match, Becky. Who do you think that favors? BL: The Crippler was close to winning the world title . . . at least when that stinky Subway Psycho had the belt. And ordinarily, I would never go with Mr. Coffee, but I liked the punishment he doled out on Dan Kauffman at Midsummer Madness. He's still hindered by that fake redhead running around with him though. [Becky tosses back her own red hair] I'll call it a draw. LM: Talk about going out on a limb! Let's go up to the ring! [Sparkplug Lee blows a kiss at Lisa, the IIWF ring girl, before raising the microphone.] BL: Hey, it looks like that little tramp Lisa raised Sparkplug's microphone. LM: Becky, would you please stop! SL: This match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Hagerstown, Maryland, weighing 265 pounds and accompanied to the ring by Carla Daughtery, he is . . . Joe Latta! [Big heel pop as Latta and Carla enter the arena to Alanis Morrisette's "You Oughta Know." Halfway down the aisle, a fan tries to grab Carla, but Joe grabs him and pushes him into the next row. The two then steam down to the ring as Joe still looks upset.] LM: Joe Latta apparently doesn't like the fans trying to touch his valet. BL: That fan was just trying to touch her hair to see if the red would rub off. Humph! [The spotlight again falls on Sparkplug Lee] SL: And his opponent, hailing from parts unknown, weighing 267 pounds, he is . . . The Crippler! [Another big heel pop as Crippler enters the coliseum to "Midnight Rambler." He grabs a homemade poster that says: "Cripple This!" and tears it in two before throwing it back in the fan's face. He climbs into the ring and eyes Latta. The referee calls for the opening bell: Ding! Ding!] LM: It's unusual to see Latta out here without Lau or other members of the Syndicate. BL: Think there's trouble in the Syndicate? LM: Hey, I learned my lesson. I don't speculate any more. [The two men lock up, but Latta gains the advantage and slows the Crippler with an arm bar. He adds serveral forearm blows, dropping Crippler to one knee, then whips his opponent into the ropes and backdrops him. He again goes to the arm bar and holds it for nearly a minute. Latta finally release the hold and both men get to their feet. Crippler whips Latta into the ropes and sends him to the mat with his legsweep faceslam.] LM: Ouch! The Crippler has been know to damage ligaments with that move. BL: Yeah, but nobody pulls a groin like me. LM: Darn it, Becky. Stop that talk right now! [The Crippler goes to work on Latta with a series of punishing moves, culminating in his clawhold. Latta refuses to submit, but is clearly disoriented after Crippler breaks the hold. He hit the spinning DDT on Latta and covers: 1 - 2 - kickout! Crippler goes to the top rope and drops a knee on Latta before quickly covering again: 1 - 2 - kickout! Crippler goes back to the top rope, but Latta limps to the corner and tosses him into the middle of the ring.] LM: It looks like the Crippler went to the well once too often. BL: Wow, I was wondering how long it would take to get to your cliches. [Latta scoops up the Crippler and powerslams him. He picks him up again and hits a tilt-a-whirl powerbomb as Carla applauds from outside the ring. Latta covers: 1 - 2 - kickout! Crippler rakes Latta's eyes and gains a brief respite before Latta puts his boot to Crippler's head. Latta presses Cripper above his head and drops him across the top rope, the Cripper's neck snapping back as he hits the rope. Latta raises his arms to a big heel pop . . . which quickly changes to a face pop as Dan Kauffman races down the aisle. Latta sees him and slides from the ropes to meet his former mentor.] LM: Dan Kauffman is going to confront Joe Latta. We could have a repeat of Midsummer Madness right here! BL: When Latta kicked Kauffman's butt? Let's hope so! [Kauffman and Latta stand chest to chest yelling at each other. Kauffman points to the ring and the microphone picks up the word "unnecessary," but Latta responds with a tirade from which only one word is audible. Larry Morton quicky apologizes to the television audience for that. The referee finally gets between the men and begins pushing Kauffman away. As more security men come to help, Latta gets in a final shot with a slap to Kauffman's face. Kauffman has to be restrained as he is pushed back to the dressing room, but Latta only grins as he rolls back into the ring where the Crippler is still writhing in pain.] LM: It looks like Latta definitely got the better of that exchange. I apologize again for Latta's comment there, folks. BL: You mean you can't go on television and say . . . LM: Becky! [Latta goes back to work on the Crippler and hits a neckbreaker. Cover: 1 - 2 - kickout! He adds a swinging neckbreaker, then drops a leg across Crippler's throat. He covers: 1 - 2 - Latta pulls Crippler's up to intentionally stop the count, then smiles at the aisle where Kauffman had been. He pulls Crippler to his feet, lifts him for the shotgun suplex, and slams his opponent to the mat. Again he covers: 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] LM: Joe Latta not only got a win right there, he sent a clear message to Dan Kauffman about this intentions. It will be interesting to see what Dan has to say about this. BL: Yeah, like Kauffman needs an excuse to hear himself talk. I hope the new budget for video tapes has kicked in for the next report. LM: Now he's not that... well, I guess he is. We've got more IIWF action coming up! [Fade. Images of matches from IIWF Ring Wars flash onto the screen in monochrome: Tony Starks bashing Simon Lebec with his award; the Alphabet Boys going at it with the United Nations; Altair unmasking himself; Billy Shakespeare planting a kiss on Moondust; Rising Sun Revolution hitting their stunning finisher and raising the World Tag belts aloft; Hakiro Matsuoko missing the moonsault from the top of the cage that cost him the Intercontinental Championship; Deathbringer and Dan Kauffman battling all over the arena in their Deathmatch; the Subway Psycho pinning the Outlaw with a crucifix and raising the World title above his head. While these images flash past, a voice over:] VO: IIWF Ring Wars. Gone, but not forgotten. The battles fought by the IIWF superstars live on in the hearts and minds of millions of fans worldwide. In one month's time, the battle lines will be drawn again. Live, from the Hoosier Dome, Indianapolis, Indiana, on Saturday 28 September, the wars will start all over again. All four of the IIWF's titles will be defended. Feuds will be settled. But will good out over evil? [A huge IIWF Ring Wars logo smashes through the images and fills the screen.] VO: IIWF Ring Wars II. The second coming. [A Roman numeral "II" crashes down on the logo. Cut back to the announcers' table.] BL: What a cheesy promo. LM: Shush, Becky. That's right, folks -- we're only just over four weeks away from IIWF Ring Wars II. What an event that's going to be, live from the huge outdoor Hoosier Dome. BL: Bless you. LM: What?! BL: You sneezed, Larry. "Hoosier," you said. LM: [sighs] Let's go back over to Tim Dross, who is going to speak with Fisto Flash and his manager, Robo Stone. Over to you, Tim. [Dross is once again standing on the interview platform halfway down the aisle.] TD: Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time is the man who has left a mark on everybody he has faced. He is a man who rules with an iron fist -- literally! He is the Iron Destroyer - Fisto Flash! ["Eye of the Tiger" starts playing. There is a huge heel pop. Robo Stone leads Fisto Flash out of the locker room. On the way down the aisle there is a man holding a poster of The Hangman. Fisto Flash grabs it and gives it to Robo Stone. Robo spreads it out and then Fisto starts jabbing and power punching it until it becomes a bunch of scraps and pieces. Then they continue walking to the interview area.] TD: Welcome, Fisto. I've asked you to come here today to talk about your match this past Saturday with The Hangman, and your thoughts about any future competition that you might see. FF: HANGMAN! There's THREE things that you DON'T do in life!!! You DON'T play with FIRE!!! You DON'T eat POISON!!! And you DON'T DISS FISTO FLASH!!!!! I can and ALWAYS DO respect men that gimme a good fight; but you TRIED to cheat me outta winnin' our match!!! And yo' gonna regret that for the rest a' yo' life, ALL THREE DAYS OF IT!!!!!! RS: In case yo' too STUPID to understand Hangman; my boy's challengin' yo' *ss to a NO disqualification, NO countout FIGHT!!!!!! TD: Well, Mr. Stone, some might question the intelligence of that challenge. The Hangman, after all, has a reputation for ending the careers of IIWF superstars -- remember the Venusian Death Cell, and Altai... FF: [interrupting] BROTHER, do I look like Altair to you?! RS: My boy is NO jobber! He's THE most brutal force in wrestling!!!! And now after he beats The Hangman, there'll be no doubts, baby!!! TD: Well, I'm sure that this match can be arranged. I also have heard you, Fisto, have some interests in gold. What's your outlook on this subject? RS: His outlook is SIMPLE!!! He WANTS it!!! TD: Contenders face a tough challenge, though. How do you feel about the current IIWF Champion, Deathbringer? [crowd pops] FF: I feel NOTHIN'!!! He's not a champ, he's a CHUMP!!!!! And when he gets enough guts to fight me, he's gonna be left....for dead. ["Eye of the Tiger" starts up once more. Robo Stone leads Fisto Flash back to the locker room. Right before Fisto leaves through the curtain he says to a camera: "Hangman, you're goin' straight from my FIST LIST.....to the HOSPITAL LIST!" Cut back to the announcers' table.] LM: Fisto Flash certainly means business, Becky. We've already seen one knock-down, drag-out match between Fisto and the Hangman -- I can't imagine what we'd see in a no disqualification, no countout brawl. BL: What a hopeless imagination you must have, Larry. LM: Humph. Let's go back up to the ring for our next match. The Enigma is in action, taking on the one and only "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare. BL: Give me a break! ========================================================= "Enigma" Takezo Musashi vs. "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare ========================================================= LM: Whether you like it or not, Becky, we've got two more IIWF superstars who are vying for the Cruiserweight Championship in this matchup. And this isn't even a tournament matchup, although it could be a foreshadowing of a second-round matchup if both men win in the first round. BL: You talk sooooo much. Is your last name really Kauffman? LM: No it isn't. I realize you aren't very excited about the IIWF Cruiserweight Championship, but this is what many fans consider to be real wrestling. These guys have the high-flying moves and quickness to turn the tide of any match in the blink of an eye. You don't dare turn away for missing anything! BL: I'm sorry, did you say something Larry? LM: [sighs] Let's go up to the ring. [Sparkplug Lee is picking something from his teeth when the spotlight falls on him.] SL: Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Tokyo, Japan, weighing in at 211 pounds and accompanied to the ring by "Big Bucks" Don McQueen, he is . . . "The Enema"... uh... excuse me... "The Enigma" Takezo Musashi! BL: Enema? Did Sparkplug just call him The Enema? Holy jeez! When is this organization going to get some real talent to help me out? I wouldn't blame Musashi if he kicked Sparkplug's butt out of the ring. LM: Now, now. Musashi is still a newcomer. It takes Sparkplug a while to learn these guys' names. Besides, I hear Sparkplug is related to IIWF President Daniel Spreadbury. BL: Well, that explains a lot. Nepotism will get you far in life. [Heel pop as McQueen leads Musashi into the arena. The lights are dropped and a hush falls over the crowd as the pair walk slowly to the ring. Musashi is attired in his oriental garb adorned with mystic Japanese symbols and is clearly focused as the two approach the ring. Mysterious, cosmic sounding oriental music plays over the speakers. The Enigma climbs up onto the top turnbuckle. He lifts his arms up to the heavens and then unleashes a great cloud of silver blue smoke from his mouth. Suddenly he performs a triple somersault into the ring and lands in a martial arts stance as the lights flare back on. McQueen storms in and threatens to abuse Sparkplug Lee, who apologizes vehemently. Musashi stands in his corner, closing his eyes and seemingly in some sort of trance.] SL: Look, I said I was sorry! Ooops. And his opponent, weighing in at 237 pounds, he is . . . "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeeeeeare! [The Sweet's "Little Willie" shakes the coliseum as the crowd goes crazy. Billy Shakespeare raises his arm to the fans as he enters the coliseum and smiles at one homemade sign that reads: "Welcome back Billy... to be or not to be? TO BE!!!!" Two young fans have their faces painted to resemble Shakespeare's and an older fan chomps an official IIWF ice cream bar in Billy's likeness. Billy climbs into the ring and enjoys the pop.] LM: The fans certainly love Billy Shakespeare. I can't believe those rumors that he nearly retired after Midsummer Madness. BL: Wouldn't you consider it if you had an ice cream bar shaped in your image? I take it back, it would take too much ice cream to model one in _your_ image. LM: Well, I hear the IIWF merchandising office finally came out with those Becky LaRue fur-lined handcuffs. BL: Really? Are the keys enclosed? I'm not sure I ever unlocked Brad. [The referee calls for the opening bell: Ding! Ding! Shakespeare attempts a leg takedown, but Musashi avoids him and backs away. The Enigma answers with a spinning heel kick that Shakespeare narrowly avoids. The two finally lock up in the middle of the ring, but Billy gains the advantage with a hiptoss. Musashi is quickly to his feet and drop kicks Shakespeare through the ropes, then follows with a plancha dive onto Billy outside the ring. This draws a gasp from the crowd.] LM: There aren't many men in the IIWF I've seen move as quickly as Musashi. BL: Yeah, he's as fluid as an enema. Good lord, Sparkplug is such a dweeb. [Musashi pulls Shakespeare to his feet and attempts to run his head into the ring post, but Billy blocks it and instead runs the Enigma's head against the post. Billy adds a drop kick that sends Musashi flying back into the ring guard and charges his opponent, only to be back dropped into the stands. Musashi rolls back into the ring as the fans in the first row help Shakespeare back over the ring guard. As he climbs back to the ring apron, Shakespeare sunset flips Musashi and rolls him up for the cover: 1 - 2 - kickout!] LM: It's action like that which makes this cruiserweight division so popular. BL: Do you think they make those ice cream bars in the likenesses of other wrestlers? Boy, I'd really like to lick . . . LM: That will be enough of that, Becky! BL: What? It's so hot in here I'd like to lick an ice cream bar right now. [Shakespeare extends Musashi's arm and wrenches it, but the Japanese wrestler performs a back flip and pulls Billy in for a short clothesline. McQueen yells something from the outside and Musashi stomps on Shakespeare's head before jumping to the second rope and moonsaulting onto Shakespeare. Cover: 1 - 2 - kickout! Musashi lifts Shakespeare and whips him hard into the corner. He follows with a handspring into an elbow smash that floors Shakespeare.] LM: Musashi has gained the advantage in this match. I'm impressed not only with his quickness, but also his endurance. We've seen a lot of offense from his already. There don't seem to be any holes in his game plan. BL: You realize that another _opening_ for an enema pun, don't you? [Musashi whips Shakespeare into the opposite corner and follows him in for a splash, but Billy leaps up and scissors Musashi's neck before whipping him back into the middle of the ring. Musashi is quickly to his feet again, but Billy catches him with a drop kick and drops him to the canvas. Billy lifts the Enigma runs with him to the ropes and leaps over the top rope, pulling Musashi's throat tight against the rope. As Shakespeare drops to the coliseum floor, he releases his hold and Musashi flies back into the ring.] LM: Shakespeare finally found something to slow the Enigma down. Musashi may be injured after that move! BL: Hey, that was pretty impressive. You think Shakespeare found some new moves during his retirement? [Shakespeare is quickly back in the ring while McQueen beats on the ring apron for his man to rally. Shakespeare covers Musashi: 1 - 2 - kickout! He pulls Musashi to his feet, whips him into the ropes, and hits a cross body block into a quick cover: 1 - 2 - kickout! Shakespeare runs to the ropes, but encouters McQueen, who grabs his ankle. Although the referee does not see the interference, Shakespeare leaps over the top rope and lands squarely on McQueen, sending the manager to the coliseum floor. Big face pop. It quickly subsides however, as Musashi comes flying over the top rope and floors Shakespeare.] LM: These guys are flying all over the Coliseum. They have no respect for their bodies! BL: I have no respect for their bodies either. [Musashi, finally showing signs of tiring, rolls Shakespeare back into the ring. He hits a belly to belly superplex, then raises his fists in the air and yells something in Japanese.] LM: What did he say? BL: Do I look like I'm amphibious? If I had to guess, I'd say he's going for his Starsault Press finisher. It's a triple somersault into a moonsault. Now _this_ should be impressive. [Musashi nearly hits the move, but Shakespeare rolls out of the way at the last second. He uses the last of his strength to climb to the top turnbuckle, drawing cheers from the fans who know the Curtain Call is coming. As Musashi staggers to his feet, Shakespeare hits his backflip cross body block and rolls up the Enigma: 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Ding!] SL: Here is your winner by pinfall . . . "The Performer" Billy Shakepearrrre! [Big pop as Billy raises his arm and then leaps from the ring, hi-fiving fans as he walks up the aisle. Musashi eventually rolls from the ring and revives McQueen.] LM: Billy Shakespeare has gotten the win with the Curtain Call, but both men know they were in a battle here tonight. BL: Yeah, even _I_ was impressed by Takezo Musashi here tonight. Maybe the IIWF will come up with a rice cake shaped like Musashi. LM: Really, Becky! Is there anyone you won't insult? BL: Ummmmmmm . . . . LM: Well? BL: I'm thinking! LM: Well, there's another first. Ooooof... elbow.... again... hurts.... much. BL: Somebody else is going to be fighting for breath in just a few minutes -- that sewer rat, the Subway Psycho. LM: Before we get back up to the ring, let's go backstage to Tim Dross, who is with "Painbringer" Billy Sexton, the Psycho's opponent in this following match. Tim? [Cut to Tim Dross standing behind the entrance curtain with Billy Sexton.] TD: Thanks, Larry. With me now is one of the great superstars in the IIWF, "Painbringer" Billy Sexton. Billy, how do you feel about tonight's match with the Subway Psycho? BS: OH YEAH! How do I feel, baby? I haven't felt better in all of my life. Psycho, the time has come to feel the pain. You're looking at the greatest submission wrestler in the world today, and baby pain is coming your way. So when I have you in my armbar and you're screaming out for mercy, trust me....I won't let go. Now if you will excuse me I have to break some bones. OH YEAH! TD: Well, there you have it, guys. Sexton is ready for action. The Psycho better be ready tonight, because it looks like the People's Champion will have a real fight on his hands. Let's get up to the ring. [Cut back to the arena. The timekeeper's bell rings.] ============================================ Subway Psycho vs. "Painbringer" Billy Sexton ============================================ LM: Oh, boy... We're going to see the people's champion in action right here... Subway Psycho sure is electric, isn't he? BL: I'm not answering that... LM: What, you don't like him? BL: Use that little brain of yours, Larry... RA: Ladies and gentlemen, the following match is tonight's main event, and it is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, hailing from Wawa, Ontario, Canada, here is "Painbringer" Billlllyyyyy Sextonnnnn! ["TNT" blares over the PA Sexton steps into the centre of a spotlight. The spotlight follows his walk down to the ring to quite a few jeers from the crowd. Sexton laughs at them and waves them off.] LM: The crowd doesn't seem to like this guy much... BL: Of course not. These morons can't appreciate real talent. RA: His opponent, hailing from the subways of New York City, weighing in at 275lbs, accompanied by Mench, here is the Suuuuuuubwayyyyy Psyyyyyychooooooo! [The lights go out and the crowd pops large as the driving bass lines of Crazy Train thud through the Coliseum. A lone spotlight shines at the head of the isle revealing Mench, who cowers in the bright light. The spotlight shifts to the left, then the right to illuminate the People's Champion, Subway Psycho. The crowd goes crazy once again, holding up foam rubber subway trains. Psycho runs down the isle giving high fives as he makes his way to the ring, Mench following close behind.] LM: You know, Becky, I'm not one for that beatnik rock-and-roll music, but it really helps provide a good entrance... BL: That's heavy metal, you twit. LM: Ummm, isn't that the stuff that's evil when you play it backwards? BL: Shut up. You're such a dork, you know that? LM: [muttering] humph... Just because I'm not some hipster... [Psycho reaches the ring and the lights come up, causing Mench on the outside to squint. He puts on a pathetic looking pair of sunglasses, and seems more comfortable. Meanwhile, in the ring, Psycho and Sexton stare at each other from across the mat. Sexton points at Psycho, and then makes a breaking gesture with his hands. Psycho laughs and begins to circle Sexton. The bell rings to start the match, and the two lock up in a collar and elbow tie up. Psycho gets the upper hand and pushes Sexton to the mat, and then makes the same hand gesture to Sexton. The two lock up again, and again, Sexton goes down. Sexton gets up and an attempt at another lock up begins, except Sexton quickly executes a single leg takedown, then drops a leg on the leg he's holding. Psycho snarls in pain as Sexton digs his forearm into Psycho's knee. The crowd rally behind Psycho, but Sexton continues to punish his right leg.] LM: This is exactly what Sexton needs to do. He need to keep Psycho on the mat and wear him down, not allowing him to use that strength of his. BL: Who told you that? I know you didn't come up with that on your own... [Sexton wraps Psycho's leg up in a spinning toe-hold, and Psycho growls. Psycho hammers his fists on the mat and kicks with all of his strength with his left leg to force Sexton off. The crowd pops as Sexton is thrown into the ropes. Psycho remains on the floor, allowing Sexton to run over him, and on the rebound, gives him a boot to the gut. He follows it up with a textbook vertical suplex, and Sexton hits the mat hard. Psycho jumps up, but his right leg gives a little, causing the Psycho to lose some momentum. Psycho attempts a shoddy elbow drop, but Sexton uses the opportunity to turn it into an armbar hold, swinging his legs around the arm and trying to hyperextend the elbow of the Psycho. Psycho pounds the mat with his free arm in frustration and pain, and attempts to get on his feet. Sexton holds on, and the strain is too much for Psycho, and he falls back down. Mench gets the crowd going on a "Psy-cho!" chant.] LM: Psycho's leg is really getting him into trouble... Let's hope Sexton doesn't do the same thing to his arm. BL: Yeah, let's hope Sexton actually succeeds in ripping that arm out of its socket. [Psycho again gets to his feet, and the crowd begind to cheer. Psycho begins to power out of the hold, almost picking Sexton off the mat. In one burst of strength, Psycho raises Sexton into the air and drops him on his head.] LM: DID YOU SEE THAT!? What a display of strength from the Psycho! [Psycho bolts to the ropes as Sexton gets up and hits a running clotheline, but seems just as hurt by the maneuver as he grasps his damaged arm.] BL: Did you see that? What a display of stupidity from the Psycho... You don't go to using that arm like it was fresh after Sexton has focused on it. [As Psycho nurses his arm, Sexton runs in, attempting a chop block on Psycho's right leg, but Psycho dodges and drops a leg over the back of Sexton's neck. Sexton's face hits the mat, and Psycho turns to the crowd, making wild gestures to show his "losing it." Psycho begins hitting Sexton with a series of double axehandle shots to the back of the head, and then pulls Sexton to his feet. Psycho executes a fine belly to back suplex, and then straddles Sexton and begins to punch him repeatedly. The ref starts a count 1 - 2 - 3 - Psycho gets up and yells something unintelligable to the crowd. Psycho pulls Sexton up again and executes a powerbomb, but Sexton turns it into a frankensteiner, and uses the ending position to rain punches on Psycho. Sexton then locks in his patented armbar submission.] LM: Oh dear... This is Sexton's most punishing hold. I don't know how long... Wait a minute, what's this? [The crowd gives a huge heel pop as Outlaw J.W. Hardin makes his way to the ringside area.] LM: What is he doing here? I thought he was off speaking to spirits or something! BL: Look at that look in his eye, Larry... He's got something planned. [Mench stands at ringside with his back to Hardin, cheering his man on. Outlaw saunters calmly up behind Mench and taps him on the shoulder. Mench turns around and gets clocked by a haymaker from the Outlaw. The crowd goes nuts, throwing trash at the Outlaw. Mench crumples under the massive attack, and Outlaw sets him up for a Cattle Buster DDT. The crowd seems to shout "NO!" all together as Hardin drives Mench's head into the ringside floor.] LM: Oh my god! This is horrible! BL: Yeah... I wanted to do that! Oh, you nasty Outlaw! [Mench lies motionless as Outlaw laughs. Hardin picks Mench up and flings him up the isle like a sack of potatoes. Hardin follows Mench's flight and executes another brutal DDT. Blood begins to seep out from under Mench's matted hair.] LM: Mench is busted open! And the Subway Psycho doesn't even see what's going on! Sexton has his vision blocked! [Meanwhile, in the ring, Psycho breaks the armbar hold and drops Sexton with a forearm with his other arm. Psycho leaps up the the top turnbuckle, and as he signals for the De-Railer, he sees what is happening to Mench. Psycho leaps off the top rope and down to the floor as Hardin walks through the curtain to the locker room area. The referee starts a count as Psycho tends to Mench. He slaps him on the face gently to wake him, and Mench says something. The ref reaches the count of 6. Psycho gets Mench to his feet, makes sure he can stand, and then tears off after the Outlaw. The bell rings.] RA: Here is your winner, as a result of a countout, "Painbringer" Billy Sexton! [Sexton motions to the ring announcer for the microphone. He snatches it and speaks:] BS: OH YEAH! Take a good look at what I have done... The people's champion is toast. Mr. President, baby, what has transpired here has sent me straight to the top. Baby, Billy Sexton is looking for a Title shot and baby I'm going to get it. OH YEAH! [Sexton drops the microphone. The crowd jeers him. Cut to the announcers' table.] LM: I can't believe what we just saw. It looks like Mench can move, although slowly... He's making his way to the backstage area. What was the point of that, Becky? BL: Keeping the balance, Larry... Keeping the balance... Seems like those spirits told him something... LM: Well, it looks to me like J.W. Hardin learned a few tricks from the snakes in that desert... BL: Wow, Larry... Are you getting deep on me? LM: [smugly] Well, I guess so... I'm deep like... like a well-type thingy... full of.... stuff... BL: Guess not... LM: Wait a second, we're getting off track here. What the Outlaw did was inexcusable! BL: Oh, please, Larry... If the Psycho did something like that, you'd cheer him saying something stupid like "Turnabout is fair game..." LM: Would not... BL: Need I bring up Psycho's interference in a certain IC title matchup? LM: Er... No... BL: Not that I minded the outcome, mind you... LM: Come on, Becky... There's an innocent man injured here! BL: Brad really looked good with that belt... LM: [interrupting] Well, folks, the Outlaw continues to make waves here in the IIWF. That display won't have escaped the attention of Deathbringer, you can bet on that. The Psycho and the Outlaw are old enemies, and I believe we'll see them clash again in the not too distant future. Anyhow, we're out of time here tonight, but what a show we've seen! We'll be back at you next week with more IIWF Midweek Mayhem. Don't forget that there's more live IIWF action this Saturday Night! Until then, for Tim Dross and Becky LaRue, this is Larry Morton -- see you next week, folks! [Cut to Sexton standing in the ring celebrating. Fade] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | Send mail to iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk with the subject lines: | | "send faq" for the FAQ + "send singles" or "send tag" for the | | rosters + "send handlers" for a list of handlers | +------------------------------------+---------------------------------+ | URL: http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk/ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+