##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== Control Centre Update - 6 September 1996 ----------------------------------------------- Hi there, folks, and welcome to Friday's IIWF Control Centre Update! I'm Tim Dross, and in today's report, I'll be: - running down the events of Wednesday night's Midweek Mayhem - looking forward to tomorrow night's action - giving you an update on the progress of the IIWF Cruiserweight Championship Tournament - hearing from more newcomers to the IIWF - running down the latest rankings and in my Dross Report, I'll be taking a look at an interesting situation that is developing between Hakiro Matsuoko and the "Enigma" Takezo Musashi. All that and more coming up here today! So let's get straight to it... IIWF Midweek Mayhem - 4 September 1996 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With the Outlaw out on the prairies once more, Wednesday night's card was free of his brutal and evil doings. However, that doesn't mean that we were short of action! Let's run down the results: 1. The ACES OF THE DEEP defeated the ROTUNDOS in their first appearance. Sam "Shark" Summers and Peter "Piranha" Pouls were impressive in their debut, and go on to face the High Plains Drifters tomorrow night. 2. SABIN FIGARO wrestled his first IIWF singles match against MAJESTIC MAURICE McARTHUR, and soon put him away with the Bum Rush. Sab had these comments: -- Triple M? Royalty? Oh, this is SWEET. You're about as royal as a nun. I am now on my own, and ya know what? I don't back down, I don't back out, I don't go from 2nd to 1st, only press the gas pedal harder and you, little man, now know to respect the Royalty of the Streets, take that to the bank! LET'S DANCE. Regards: S. R. Figaro -- 3. CASEY "BLACKHEART" JAMES defeated "PAINBRINGER" BILLY SEXTON with his Black Death spinebuster, thanks to the interference of IIWF Intercontinental Champion Tiger Claw. Claw held Sexton on the outside, allowing Casey to hit his Blackheart Punch, a paralysing move which sent Sexton crashing to only his third defeat. He is adamant that he won't be robbed again: [Camera fades into Billy Sexton standing infront of the IIWF logo. He looks at the camera and speaks:] "OH YEAH! A long time ago a wise man told me never mess with the best 'cause you'll only get burned. Well, Tiger Claw, baby, you messed with the best. You stuck your nose into my business and baby I don't like that. You see, Tiger Claw I am the man, the legend, the Painbringer Billy Sexton, and no man makes the best look foolish. When I step into the ring against you, I want you to bring all your friends along 'cause baby, when I am finished with your lifeless body I will have the pleasure of slapping every single one of your friends. Tiger Claw I don't need any friends, managers, or valets. You're looking at the best submission wrestler in the world today. When we meet for the gold that is currently around your waist I am not going to bring pain to town -- I'm just going to break your neck. OH YEAH!" [Fade] 4. VINNY CAPPICOLA defeated MR. DAMAGE, pinning him after the Eradicator. Otto Verhoeven made his presence known during the match, however, and he will meet Cappicola in the ring tomorrow night. 5. Undefeated tag team HEAVY METAL continued their rise with a victory over former IIWF Tag Champs STEAMROLLER, despite a strong start from Taylor and Brassow. In the end, Taylor was on the wrong end of the Olympic Slam, and was pinned. [SCENE: Robo Stone and Heavy Metal are standing in front of a camera backstage after their match.] RS: STEAMROLLER. HA! HA! HA! You were GREAT tag-team champions. But the KEY word is WERE. Atlas: You were at some point the IIWF tag champs; that means that you were GOOD. Now we were still trainin' then, but losin' the gold meant that you have a weakness. And tonight, baby, we exploited that weakness. WE CRUSHED YOU!!! Apollo: COLD!!! HARD!!! INTENSE!!! THAT'S what HEAVY METAL beatin' on ya' feels like!!! If you thought that you were injured before.... how'd ya feel now, LOSERS?! [Heavy Metal pose as Robo Stone laughs. Fade] 6. PRISONER #109 and "BADBOY" RANDY ACORN fought to a double countout in a match that had far more brawling than wrestling. Although the match is over, there's still bad blood between these two: [SCENE: Randy Acorn standing outside the gates of a federal prison. There are guards stationed in two towers on each side of the gate. There's a guard walking towards the fence.] Guard: May I help you sir?? RA: Yes, I'm Randy Acorn with Channel 7 news [shows ID] and I'm writing a documentary on prison life. I was wondering if I could use your prisoners as my main focus. Guard:[thinking quietly]...Umm, I think it will be okay but I better call the Warden and make sure. [The guard gets on his walkie talkie and begins talking to some man. After a minute or so, he stops talking.] Guard: The Warden will allow it, but only today. Randy Acorn: [smiling arrogantly] No problem, no problem at all. [The guard opens the gate and lets Randy in. Randy walks to the main building, signs in and proceeds. He goes into the main area as there are hundreds of jail cells. Randy, seemingly guessing, stops and talks to a man resting in his cell.] Randy Acorn: Hey, hey you. Man: [Looking up]Huh?? What do you want? Randy Acorn: Just want to ask you a few questions. Man:[frowning] Sure, why not? Randy Acorn: First and foremost, do you know a man that goes by the name of Prisoner #109?? Man: Hell, yeah I know him. He used to go around here and kick....... [Camera pans on Randy giving the man a carton of cigarettes and the man smiles] Man: ...kick people over in the shower so he could do that weird $#!t. You know, ba.... Randy Acorn: Yes I know, you don't need to go into detail. Is there anything else that you can tell me about him?? Man: Yeah, nobody liked him but of course most of them had their @$$e$ kick..... [Randy hands the man some money as the camera pans down] Man: I mean that most of them had their @$$e$ banged by him. Yeah he was a real loser. Anybody in this jail could take him. Hell, I even pounded him a couple of times. Randy Acorn: [smiling] You're telling the truth, aren't you?? Man: Of course. WAIT! Is he going to see this?? Randy Acorn: Of course. Man: I take everything....... [The man tries to finish what he's saying but Randy pushes the cameraman away.Randy walks out of the jail and back outside the gate. From here you get a good look at the prison and Randy's arrogant smile] Acorn: Man, what an interview. After hearing what that guy had to say about you, maybe I had better worry more than I thought. I sure wouldn't want my beautiful butt to be hurt. Listen prisonboy, I don't care what you've done in matches because you haven't done them to me. Everyone's saying that I'd better be focused, well I am focused, always. Prisoner #109, suck my [BLEEP]. [Screen fades to black as ten guards run towards the gate and Randy takes off in his Mercedes.] 7. LAW & DISORDER went down to defeat as they faced the HIGH PLAINS DRIFTERS, who have refocused themselves and are now chasing the gold with a passion. The Armed Forces came down to watch the match, but as Pale and Easy hit the "Hang 'em High" clothesline for the win, NavCom and DefCon left ringside. No doubt they will attempt to dodge the challenge of the team from whom they wrested the belts a few weeks ago, but the Drifters will not be denied their shot forever. 8. THE PUNSTER defeated the PRINCE OF DARKNESS when Archangel interfered. This is the second time we've seen the Dark Prince costed a match at the hands of the mysterious Archangel, and tomorrow night they will meet one on one in the ring. The Dark Knights are adamant that we won't see another repeat performance: 9. The "ENIGMA" TAKEZO MUSASHI defeated CRIMSON STORM, pinning him after the stunning Starsault Press. Hakiro Matsuoko had been watching the match from the head of the aisle, and when Musashi hit this move, he ran to the ring and a heated altercation between the two took place. The dispute seemed to have been broken up by the Family, the IIWF's self-appointed enforcers, but then Tiger Claw and Joe Latta arrived on the scene, and the situation could have exploded. Thankfully the flashpoint passed without real confrontation, but we'll be talking a whole lot more about this situation later on. 10. We saw the first two semi-finals in the IIWF Cruiserweight Championship Tournament: in the first, HAKIRO MATSUOKO defeated DAN KAUFFMAN -- with the assistance of Joe Latta, I should add -- to progress to the finals. It was another angry, uncharacteristic performance from Kauffman, and after the match, he attacked Latta before storming up the aisle. I can only assume that Latta is certainly pushing the right buttons with Kauffman: [SCENE: Backstage at the Coliseum. The hotline room, where Tim Dross is updating his current information...] TD: And in other news, many wrestlers are eagerly anticipating the Golden Grapple Awards Show on the 12th of September, and a few have speeches made up and ready to go should they win. Of course, the offic... WAIT A MINUTE!!!... [What looks to be a cup full of coffee sails through the air, just missing Dross!] TD: Hey! You've really lost it, you know that???... [A familiar voice screams "SHUT IT, DROSS!!!", then Dan Kauffman appears real close to the camera, furious as he speaks...] DK: LATTA!!! Now you've gone and made it personal. Costing me a normal match would have been bad enough, but no, you go and get me screwed out of the Cruiserweight competition. No big loss; I may be a cruiserweight by stature, but in reality, you're messing with a HEAVYWEIGHT who's OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE!!! Latta, you just don't know where to draw the line, do you? Well pal, I'm going to put so many bruises, scrapes and burns on your body that Brian Lau will be able to feel your pain! It won't be pretty... In fact, the TV guys will probably have to censor most of the match! Latta, I hope you've updated your damned insurance, cause you're going to need every PENNY of the coverage to recover! TD: Settle down, Dan! Geez, I've never seen you like this... DK: That's the point. Blame Latta for it, not me. I'm merely doing what I have to do. The fans don't have to like it, you don't have to like it, noone has to like it, but this is the way it's going to be! Got it? GOOD! Latta, no more games, you're walking headlong into a real nasty surprise. [Kauffman gives a menacing glare to Dross, then walks out of the room as quickly as he entered, shouting one last thing... "Oh, and be sure that Lau gets a personal copy of this, will you? I don't want him feeling left out...". Fade] 11. In the second semi-final, the MAN OF STEEL upset TIGER CLAW to advance to the finals. Steel knocked Claw off-balance as he went for the Golden Tiger Strike, allowing him to go for his Doomsday finisher. Casey James tried to make the save, but was intercepted by Bibbo Bibowski, and Steel got the hard-fought victory. Let's hear from the Syndicate now: [SCENE: The courtyard of the Dojo. All of the Syndicate except Hakiro Matsuoko are present.] KT: Hello, everyone. This is Kenny Tanaka reporting to you from the Dojo. Some major events took place at this past Wednesday's card, and here with comments is Brian Lau. Brian? BL: Thank you, Kenny. Well, first, I'd like to address the Cruiserweight tournament. Unfortunately, Tiger Claw was eliminated by some shady dealings thanks to the Man of Steel. We'll talk about that in a moment. Hakiro, on the other hand, is still in the tournament after beating Dan Kauffman. Dan, your new attitude is somewhat refreshing, but it's going to take more than a little adjustment to put us out. JL: The pecker hit me again for no reason. Dan, I've had it. For years I lived in your shadow, and when I finally take the initiative and go out on my own to greener pastures, you have to come along and try and ruin it for me. Hakiro beat you in the middle of that ring fair and square. So who do you take it out on? Me. That's it. You and me in the ring. That's how it's got to be settled. You think you're some tough guy with the chair shots and the bending of the rules? I'm going to teach you a lesson in how it's done. That's right. Me teaching you a lesson. How about that for poetic justice? KT: I'd like to ask you about Hakiro, Brian. Where is he? BL: He is in meditation right now. KT: What is going on between him and Takezo Musashi? BL: Kenny, I would really like to tell you, but it isn't exactly my tale to tell. I'm sure that Larry Morton will use this as a basis to spread rumors of trouble in the Syndicate, but those rumors would be false. It is best that you go to Hakiro yourself and get it straight from him. KT: Okay, then, I will do so. Do you think he'll mind? BL: I don't think so. But first, let's get back to the business with Man of Steel. He really gave a shining performance on Wednesday. He beat the Intercontinental champion. Too bad for him that it was a non-title match. Well, Man of Steel, you've proven you are worthy, so I guess you are entitled to a shot. Of course, I don't think it's Tiger Claw you should be focusing on. [Casey James steps out from the background.] CJ: Man of Steel, you bother me. Your little friend BeeBop Bru-ha-ha bothers me too. He feels that he can put his hands on me and get away with it, but he's dead wrong. I am making it my perogative to take the two of you out for a very long time. MOS, you and I go back pretty far. But a parting of the ways was inevitable. You think you're superhuman, but I know you're just a man. If I break your knees, you'll crumple to the mat just like any other man. Take a look at me. I'm in better shape than ever, and there's no better place to train in the United States than the Dojo. I want you back in the ring where I can pummel you some more. And I'll do the same to your juice-bag friend after I'm done with you. BL: You see, Man of Steel doesn't seem to realize that he won't be able to make it to any title match. Casey is going to see to that. Speaking of title matches, Don Antonio seems to think that he's the carrier of justice in the IIWF with that little courtroom scene of his. Chicago justice, maybe. You see, Don? I know quite a bit about you and your culture, yet you know almost nothing of ours. Tiger Claw and I can study your ways through motion pictures and books and newsreels. What can you do? The only exposure you have to our culture is so watered down that it can do you no good. We already have an advantage over you, Don, and we're going to use it to the fullest. The only court that holds any water in the IIWF is in that ring, where two men battle it out to see who wins. Tiger Claw will be the winner, and in more ways than one. Tiger Claw is going to hurt you. Tiger Claw is going to embarrass you. Tiger Claw is going to bury you. Case closed. KT: Thank you for your time, Brian. I'm going to see if Hakiro wants to shed some light on his situation. BL: Good luck, Kenny. KT: Well, folks, that's all we have here for now. I'll be back with some comments from Hakiro Matsuoko later on. [Fade] 12. CHRIS QUIGLEY defeated BRAD "BODYBAG" KINDER despite the attempted interference of Otto Verhoeven. The Butcher's appearance marred a competitive match, as the Teutonic terror came down to the ring and snatched the shades with which Quigley had presented a young fan before the match. Quigley went after Verhoeven, and a brawl ensued in the aisle. However, despite the beating that "Quickstrike" took, he was able to pull out the victory by pinfall after a superkick. Brad Kinder's future in the IIWF remains uncertain, however -- rumours persist that he is on the brink of retiring, at least temporarily. We'll keep you updated. 13. DEATHBRINGER defeated FISTO FLASH in a successful defence of his IIWF World title, but not without the Senate coming to ringside to interfere in the match. After the referee took a bump, the Hangman attacked Fisto, placing the noose around his neck and attempting to choke him. The interference allowed Deathbringer to pin Fisto following the Scythe at the climax of a hard-fought and exciting match. Let's hear from the champion: [SCENE: Deathbringer stands in the mortuary where the IIWF championship belt lies in an open casket] DB: Man Of Steel, I heard your words and I appreciate them. Of course I will be on the side to stop the evil, but I cannot see how to be on the side of light. Afterall I am what I am and you would not suspect the reaper to have a quarter in heaven, do you? So do not consider me as a partner, just consider me as an ally in this war. However this shows me that there are mortals who are willing to risk their lives to stop the evil on this world. At least I can see a glint of hope lying in the future of earth... [A flash that strikes down on the outside of the mortuary and lightens the scene up for the fraction of a second before it falls back into the known darkness] DB: Sandman, you are coming. And it is just what I could foresee. The darkness you bring with you cannot scare me, for nothing scares the reaper. You are right, darkness will always prevail. However, as fire can be fought with fire, darkness can be fought with darkness and the darkness I spread is pitch black. Sandman, you are coming. But beware to not cross the line for it would turn out to be a one way trip to hell. [Another flash strikes down] DB: The signs of war cannot not be overseen anymore. Soon it will break out, and leave death and destruction all around. It is a battle no one shall win, not until the leaders end up in the reaper`s hand... Yes, it is you, Outlaw, who has to end up on the darkside. And it is you, Outlaw, who _will_ end up on the darkside. You once said that this war is not about titles, but about the prize only the two of us know... [Deathbringer closes the casket with the IIWF championship belt in it with a loud sound] So be it... [Fade] All in all, it was another exciting card, and there's more to come tomorrow night! IIWF Saturday Night - 7 September 1996 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What will be the final card in the IIWF Coliseum for the next few weeks promises to be a real stormer tomorrow night. Let's run down the action in prospect: Arabian Knights vs. Pain Inc. [D] We'll meet these two new tag teams later on in the programme, but we should see a highly competitive match between these two newcomers as each team attempts to impress on its debut. Man Of Steel vs. Magus [D] The Man Of Steel needs all the momentum he can get going into next Wednesday's Cruiserweight Tournament finals, when he will have to wrestle two matches in a night, and he'll attempt to keep up his current good form with a victory over the madman, Magus. The Punster vs. The Crippler [D] It appears that the Crippler has been unable to agree contractual terms for a renewal, and tomorrow night's match against the Punster could be his last appearance in the IIWF. The Punster, meanwhile, coming off the back of an exhausting victory over the Prince of Darknes in midweek, will be wanting to keep up his momentum. He'd better be on his guard, however, as Josey Wales is a jealous protector of his men's success, and if the High Plains Drifters are around, the Punster could be in trouble. Fisto Flash vs. Mr. Damage [D] The Senator doesn't pull any punches in his comments; he feels that Fisto Flash has made a grave mistake in signing for a match against an ally of the Senate, Mr. Damage. Let's hear from the Senator now: [SCENE: The offices of The Senator. The Hangman, Larn, Steriod, Mr. Damage and a figure sitting in the shadows.] TS: Gentlemen, you all know each other and this meeting is to settle a few details that still need to be worked out, but first I know The Hangman has a few things to say. TH: Fisto, do you really want to get into the ring with Mr. Damage? After our last encounter on Wednesday night I really can not believe you could be that stupid. Your neck has already felt the effects of the Noose. Let's just say this, it will be a COLD DAY IN HELL before you can get the best of The SENATE. TS: There have been a few rumours around the IIWF, mostly spread by a few stupid announcers. When business takes me away from my boys it is always for their benefit. Sometimes meetings can only take place in places where others cannot get to. In the past couple of months, you the fans of the IIWF have seen some strange and bewildering things. Well with the help of my friend [ The Senator points to the man in the shadows, the camera pans towards the dark figure ] the wrestling world well be in for a major surprise. Larn: Senator, I know the details required a meeting with our friend here, but can we really.....[ The Senator cuts Larn off ] TS: Now boys remember as we have always practiced, we have to wait, wait, and wait some more. However I will tell you all this: the time is closer then Mr. Lau understands. Mr. Dross, before I forget, make up what ever you want to out of this, because as always you will be wrong, no matter what you say. IIWF BEWARE!!! [The camera pans up to the dark figure and fades.] Well, whoever that mystery man is, Fisto Flash shouldn't concern himself with pondering that fact. He's going to have to go into this match tomorrow night and fight for his life against Mr. Damage and, in all probability, the rest of the Senate too. Aces of the Deep vs. High Plains Drifters [D] The Aces made a successful debut on Wednesday night, but they've now well and truly been thrown in at the deep end. They'll be facing the top ranked tag team in the IIWF, Josey Wales' High Plains Drifters, tomorrow night in what will be a real test of their drive to survive. The Sandman vs. Masked Marauder [J] [D] The Sandman is still to see significant action in the rings, but he'll make a return to the squared circle tomorrow night as he goes up against the Masked Marauder. However, I can't see the Marauder causing the leader of the dwindling Dark Knights any real problems. "Nuclear" John Bomber vs. Robski John Bomber has been a different man since the humiliation he suffered at the hands of Robski a little while ago on Midweek Mayhem. Some people even suggest that something in his head snapped after that match, and he's certainly been tearing up every place he's been since. Robski had better be worried; I would imagine that Bomber will go to any measures tomorrow night to restore his honour. Otto "the Butcher" Verhoeven vs. Vinny Cappicola Two powerhouses meet in the ring tomorrow night as Verhoeven meets Vinny. This match promises to be a real test of Verhoeven's abilities; he's made it past a couple of lower-ranked competitors so far, but he hasn't taken on a wrestler with the impressive record of the Family's "bailiff", Vinny Cappicola. Expect this match to be a real knock-down drag-out affair, with both men pulling out their big power moves. Let's hear from the dangerous Butcher: [SCENE: Tim Dross is standing in a parking lot in front of a jet-black Mercedes limousine.] TD: I am here in the parking area of the IIWF Coliseum. This [he points to the car] is the car of Otto "the Butcher" Verhoeven, who wasn't even scheduled to wrestle tonight but appeared on two occasions nonetheless and even attacked Chris Quigley. I will ... oh wait, here he comes. [Verhoeven arrives, wearing a blue track suit. Heidi is in her usual nurse outfit.] TD: Ahem, Herr Verhoeven, only a moment, please. OV: Ach, another of those reporters. TD: Could you please explain your actions tonight? Your attack on "Quickstrike" was uncalled for. NH: What do you mean, his attack? My man was only scouting the opposition when that snot-nosed punk confronted him! TD: Wait a minute, it was the Butcher who... OV: Don't talk to Heidi like that, you American weakling! I am glad that I could be of assistance to Brad Kinder, even though he could not exploit the opportunity I offered. Bad luck. But when I meet that Canadian piece of trash, when the Butcher steps into the ring with the self-proclaimed best of the best, he will learn a lesson we all had to learn in the past: There is always someone who is better. But I will not only pin him, I will humiliate him, destroy him, take away all his pride and all his petty confidence. When I am finished with that imbecile he will fear to ever step into a wrestling arena again. TD: What about Vincent Cappicola? You seem to be scared. OV [with a smile]: Ja, mein gott, I am afraid of that big, bad thug. I am afraid of looking like a fool by wasting my time with an obvious loser like that. He dared to insult me, and worse, he mocked my beloved home country. He will pay for that. It will be a dark night for the Family, no doubt about that. Look around you, Vinny, you will be alone against me. Your friend won't make the mistake to help you and risk an injury on the night he is scheduled to fight the true "People's Champion", no, the Don will go down later that night. And your weak manager... NH: I vill take care of that old idiot. After all, I am an accomplished vrestler and more than capable of preventing him to interfere when my liebling takes apart poor Capucino. You know, I think they made a mistake in his file, he did not break legs when he was 12, he breaks the legs of 12 year old boys, that coward. OV: Cut the lame jokes, Heidi, the situation is too serious. Vincent you do not stand a chance. I am bigger than you, I am stronger than you and I am smarter then you. I will exploit all your soft spots, all your weaknesses, I will dismantle you in the ring. Enforcer of the IIWF, you will be just another victim! NH: We declare open season on the IIWF. Gute nacht, Amerika. [They enter the car and drive off.] TD: Phew, at least he didn't hit me. [Fade] I also took the opportunity to speak with Vinny Cappicola here in the Control Centre earlier on today. Let's go to that interview now: [Cut to a table at which are seated Tim Dross and Vinny Cappicola. Vinny is wearing a smart suit.] TD: Vinny, what are your thoughts about your upcoming match with Otto, and what do you feel about the comments he directed at you earlier in the week? VC: Well, Tim, I wanna start off by sayin' dat dis man is a disgrace to da honorable European Community. You see, he talked about da Italians being Hitler's allies durin' da war and all I gotta say is dat's why my grandfadda left Italy an' came here to da US of A. We didn't sit through da ugly atrocities of da war chantin' Italian patriotic songs while our nation wuz murderin' innocent people and den proclaim dat we were disgusted da whole time like dat ugly German's ancestors did. We didn't like what we saw and got da heck out, like any otha honorable man would've. This German is just like da rest of dem neo-nazi patriots in his country today. He's so quick to point out dat Germany is such a world power today, well all I gotz to say to dat is hey, tough guy, who do you tink rebuilt dat nation? You guessed it slick, the good old U S of A. You should be proud dat we Americans helped out your pathetic nation after we drilled your psycho dictator into da ground, you shouldn't mock us... and dat's where I got a problem wit you buddy. TD: Those are pretty strong words, Mr. Cappicola. VC: You bet dey are, Tim. Frankly, I'm sick and tired of every international American hater puttin' down dis great country. We coulda taken over da whole world if we wanted to but felt dat we wuz betta off instillin' dignity into each other nation and their people. Then we get clowns like dis guy comin' onto our soil tellin us dat we're all a bunch of no good Americans. I tell you what, dirtball, loser of dis match has got to sit through da otha's national anthem, how does dat sound? Although I am proud of my Italian ancestry, I am now an American-Italian, dat's America first if you can't read, so you'll be listenin' to dat star-spangled banner tomorrow, Van Heffer or whatever your name is. TD: You know that Otto Verhoeven does have connections with the Outlaw and a number of other wrestlers here in the IIWF. What do you feel about the influence of these men in your match? VC: Bring'em all on, Dross. If he tinks dat da Outlaw is gonna help him get da belt den he should open his eyes cause guess what Otter, da Outlaw and his boys ain't got no belts of their own so maybe you would be betta served joinin' wit da Family cause we'll have the IC belt tomorrow. Den again, you'd have to make some serious changes if we wuz gonna take you unda our wing so maybe you will be betta off teamin' wit dose losers and ridin all your glory on interferin' in otha peoples' matches like dey have. Mr Van Heffer, please bring out your cronies tomorrow night so dat I can bring out da good wrestlers of da league and we can rid da IIWF of your presence once and for all! Bring it on baby, BRING IT ON! [Vinny begins singing the US national anthem] TD: Thank you for your time, Vinny. Best of luck with your match tomorrow night. VC: ... land of da FREE, and da home of da brave. [Fade] "Enigma" Takezo Musashi vs. Marty Warnett Two light heavyweights clash in the ring tomorrow night as the impressive rookie, Marty Warnett, goes up against the dangerous and mysterious "Enigma" Takezo Musashi. It's still unclear what Musashi's position is concerning his manager, "Big Bucks" Don McQueen, but it will certainly be interesting to see if McQueen accompanies the Enigma to the ring in this match. Warnett defeated Simon Lebec last week, and freely admits that every match is a learning experience for him, but will he have what it takes to escape the spectacular high-impact offense of the Enigma? We'll find out for sure tomorrow night. Archangel vs. Prince of Darkness We've seen the Archangel interfere in the Dark Prince's affairs twice over the last week, but tomorrow night he must put his money where his mouth is and go up against the Dark Knight in person. He's certainly a genetic wonder, standing at 7'3" and weighing in at 400lbs, but what are his wrestling skills like? Once a big man's knocked to the mat, he's just the same size as everybody else, and the PoD is certainly capable of toppling practically any competitor. He's a damaging and powerful opponent, and I suspect we'll see a real display of his power tomorrow night. Let's hear from the PoD and the Sandman: [SCENE: The morgue. A low light casts evil shadows over tombstones. A dense fog sits across the land like a thick blanket. Two figures are slightly visible -- PoD and Sandman -- while silhouettes of others linger in the background.] PoD: When the PoD was called on by the Knights, deep within the pits of insanity, I knew what was ahead. Sandman, don't talk such loyalty with a group of rogues like us. You never know who'll cut you down for a piece of the pie. I know where I stand, and I know where I'm going. The Tiger Claw escaped my wrath at the hands of the Archangel. Now, it seems everyone wants a shot at the POD. You talk about sides?? Where were you?? Kinder?? That lousy Phantom?? Stay with me if you will, or leave if you wish. I know I can only trust a select few. Sandman: As we stand in this land of dead I am BONDED to those of the dark. PoD, I would never pull you in to leave you dry. That is why I stand here among the restless souls to tell you this. That's it, that's what it's all about....... A lot of questions are being raised and people are wondering where was I when PoD was attacked. Where was Kinder? That is a mystery that will soon solve itself. Once again, I will tell the PoD and the world this, I will not let a brother of the DARK down! That I promise. I didn't summon the Prince to cross him, he is with us for a reason. And now revenge will be so sweet. So this Archangel better watch out, 'cause the gun scopes are on you and I don't miss, especially on such a large target. Like the saying goes, the bigger they are the harder they fall. Now to the figure heads of the warring camps, MoS and Outlaw. Let's not play games, you both know where the Knights stand and you know how to cantact me. I will become the bringer of death, the psycho on the loose with a flare for battle. Use my talents. I can hang men, I can claw victims and you know I have a black heart. Just remember I'm loyal to one side. Darkness is our way of life... [Fade] ========================================= IIWF INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: ========================================= Tiger Claw vs. Don Antonio Tiger Claw isn't happy about defending the IC belt against Don Antonio, but the Sicilian's record speaks for itself. He's come up through the rankings like a rocket in the past couple of months, dragging himself up into the top ten, and now he's more than ready for his first title shot here in the IIWF. His right hand man, Vinny Cappicola, made an unsuccessful onslaught on the IC title when it was held by Brad Kinder, but the Don has always, in his opinion, been passed over for a shot. We witnessed the first session of the court of the Enforcers on Wednesday night, and the Don promised that he would pass sentence on Claw: taking the IC title away from him. This match promises a lot, folks -- we've got the wily, agile and technically skilled Tiger Claw, and we've got the Don, who is also no slouch technically, and who surely has the edge in power terms. The Don is going to fight for all he's worth in a match that is his most important yet here in the IIWF, and I, for one, can't wait. ======================================= IIWF WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: ======================================= Armed Forces vs. Stunt Team USA The Armed Forces have, so far, as champions defeated the top ranked team, albeit by default, and now they face the team ranked #2. With their manager, Aaron the Caddy, ready to accompany them to the ring once more following the attack from the Drifters last weekend, the Forces are back at full-strength, and will no doubt attempt to outsmart Ron and Steve tomorrow night. Let's hear from the champions: [SCENE: outside the Omaha Civic Auditorium. NavCom and DefCon, the Armed Forces, are getting out of the limo owned by Aaron the Caddy. They are alone, as Aaron is recovering at home. They are carrying the IIWF World Tag Team Titles across their shoulders.] NavCom: Did you hear those jobbers callin' us names? DefCon: Yeah, Heavy Lead. Big deal. Listen, boys, we pride ourselves in misnomers, not you. NavCom: Yeah, so if you wanna make up names for teams, consult us first. We're the ones that brought you "Flaw and Out of Order", and we're gonna keep coming up with the latest monikers for the tag scene. DefCon: As for your insults. Yeah, they were heard. NavCom: And ignored. You see, you low class, bottom of the heap chumps don't impress us with your big mouths. When we were workin' through the ranks, we didn't even mention the champs...or the belts until right before our title shot. We've got respect for the champs...[points to the belt on his shoulder]...and baby, you should, too. DefCon: Yeah, we're gettin' a little sick of all the jobbers out there. Waaah, waaah, we're not gettin' a shot. We're not worthy. We lose every match. NavCom: Yeah, aren't there always some idiots who lose every match they have, and then wonder why they're not gettin' any title shots, or why they're stuck in dark matches jobbing for random teams? DefCon: Tell me about it. It's a lot windier at the top, we know that. But, we don't care. Because most of the wind up here is HOT AIR...COMING FROM YOU JOBBERS!!! NavCom: Okay, the business at hand. We've got another match with Stunt Team USA... let's talk turkey. DefCon: Turkey? I'll say they're a bunch of turkeys. Ok, Hunt Team. Here's what's goin' on. We're givin' you this shot as a favor. You did us a favor early in our careers, jobbin' to us. No big surprise, you guys suck, but the "Chump Committee" thought you guys were good. NavCom: They're not too bright. DefCon: Tell me about it. I hear they wanna give HPD another shot. NavCom: Figures. Anyway, STUSA, here's your match. You're supposedly worthy. I doubt it. Bring all you got, but what do you have now that is better than the team we beat a month ago? We've becomed cagier, smarter, better athletes since our last meeting. And we beat you there, too! I don't know what you can possibly do to beat us now!!! DefCon: Hey, rumor has it...they got a manager. [Tons of laughter.] NavCom: Yeah, I guess they do. The "Wizard"? You wish. It'll take a lot more than a little magic to beat us. You're gonna have to pull more than a rabbit out of a hat...you'll have to pull a miracle out of your butts. DefCon: I'm not worried. Fire and Forget are jobbers, and they'll always be jobbers. Now they've got some genius manager. We've got the best manager, we've got the best athletes, we've got the will to win. NavCom: And we've got something else. We've got the gold. [Both men show off the belts again.] DefCon: We've got 'em. Come and get 'em boys. Come and get 'em. [Fade] STUSA haven't had many title shots here in the IIWF, despite their impressive record, and they're going to be sure not to waste this one. With their new manager, the "Wizard" Belgarath McEndeavour, behind them, they're more confident than ever: [SCENE: Outside of a hut within a forest. Smoke comes out of the chimney. Steve Forget appears in the entrance, sweat dripping off his body. In the background you hear a heavy hammer pounding on metal. Steve sits down on a bench in front of the hut as the Wizard appears] BM: Greetings, noble knight! Do you advance on your way? SF: Well, let's say it's some hot job ya gave me. How long do I have to do this? BM: You'll know when you're done, my knight. Let me test thy strength now... SF: Whaddya about to do? Arm wrestling me? No offence, Wizard, but... BM: [interrupting] No, not against me, but against this worthy man I found back in town [he waves towards a figure that now enters the scene. The man is gigantic in size, about 6'9 and weighing in at approximately 380 lbs] SF: [staring at the man with wide open eyes] Erm... What... Who is that? BM: Your opponent, Sir Forget. Now get ready for the challenge. SF: Yeah, right... [Steve and the man shake hands, then get ready for their arm wrestling match. It takes the stranger about 3 seconds to score the win. The Wizard congratulates him and the man leaves the scene] BM: So what do you think, Steve, is thy work done already? SF: Well, I don't think so... I'll get back to work right now! [Steve re-enters the hut] BM: Noble, very noble... [he turns to the camera] Armed Forces, I learned that ye gave us a chance at the crown. I don't know whether my knights will be thoroughly prepared for this match, but I do know that it'll take a while to get another chance. Therefore I'll order them to throw everything on you they got. And though our training has just started I'm confident they learned a lot already. They learned their first but most important lessons, and they will treat you in another way than they treated you in the past. Don't expect them to act in a known way. I teach them to use their instincts for it is lethal to ignore your own instincts. You, Armed Forces, were trained to seek out opponents and kill them with weapons, using electronic guidance. This disqualifies you for real hand-to-hand combat, an art that my knights will train until they become masters in it. They'll seek your weaknesses and concentrate on them. And in the end the dragonslayers will rule supreme. Armed Forces, hail to the new kings... [He lifts his robe, starts turning around and disappears in a cloud of dust. Fade] ====================================================== IIWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP TOURNAMENT SEMI-FINAL: ====================================================== "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley vs. "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare This match pits two of the IIWF's brightest stars against one another. It's a pity that these two couldn't avoid meeting in the tournament until the finals, but this promises to be one of the best matches we've seen in the IIWF for some time. Quigley, the experienced journeyman, has faced opponents of all shapes and sizes in his long career, but Billy too, has one of the most impressive win-loss records in the IIWF, hardly ever dropping out of the top five ranked superstars. Let's hear from him as he prepares for this match: [Billy Shakespeare is intently reading a script backstage. He looks up, momentarily startled] BS: "Quickstrike" Quigley, it is indeed a shame that we must meet. But lo the matter remains that despite the mutual appreciation we doth have for each other's art, yea, you still stand between me and mine rightful reward: the IC belt. In my mind it's not yet time for the understudy to step to the fore. You can watch the all the films you want, but it's never the same as experiencing a live performance. And, as always, I'm "Born to perform". [Fade] What kind of a contest can we expect? Well, it'll be athletic, sportsmanlike, exciting, high-flying, high-impact, and an extremely close call. You can bet that whichever of these men makes it to this Wednesday's finals will have earned his spot. In all, tomorrow night's card will be one of the most exciting we've seen here in the IIWF for some time. Don't miss one moment of the action, as we hit your screens live tomorrow from the IIWF Coliseum! IIWF Cruiserweight Championship Tournament Update ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We're on the last stretch in the quest to crown the IIWF's first ever Cruiserweight Champion. We know that two of the finalists will be Hakiro Matsuoko and the Man Of Steel, and the final spot will be decided tomorrow night. Let's take a look at the brackets: First Round Semi-finals Finals [ Dan Kauffman ]-. |-[ Dan Kauffman ]-. [ Bob Hansen ]-' | |-[ Hakiro Matsuoko ] [ Hakiro Matsuoko ]-. | |-[ Hakiro Matsuoko ]-' [ Simon Lebec ]-' [ Man Of Steel ]-. |-[ Man Of Steel ]-. [ Pale Rider ]-' | |-[ Man Of Steel ] [ Tiger Claw ]-. | |-[ Tiger Claw ]-' [ Crimson Storm ]-' [ Chris Quigley ]-. |-[ Chris Quigley ]-. [ Takezo Musashi ]-' | | [ B. Shakespeare ]-. |-[ Finalist ] |-[ B. Shakespeare ]-' [ Randy Acorn ]-' The first ever Cruiserweight Champion will be crowned this Wednesday night as the three finalists must each wrestle two matches in a single evening for the right wear the crown. All these matches will be live on Midweek Mayhem, which will, this Wednesday, be coming from the Omni in Atlanta, Georgia, as we begin our second tour of the States. I can't wait for this Wednesday, folks; we're promised a very exciting night of action. Newcomers Update ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ New arrivals continue to pour into the IIWF. In today's update, I'll be introducing three new tag teams who have already signed contracts to compete here! First, let's introduce the team known as Pain Inc. Here's their manager, Mr. Mic: [SCENE: Mr. Mic and his two wrestlers, Morningstar and Hellraiser, stand in the IIWF interview area. Mr. Mic speaks:] "Listen up IIWF! All the rest of you loser tag-team can hit the road now and thanks for playin' because the best is here. I give you Morningstar and Hellraiser, collectively known as Pain Inc. Oh, and let me introduce myself -- I am Mr. Mic, manager extraordinaire, and don't you forget it. Wanna know why my team is called Pain Inc???? C'mon step into the ring and find out....BUT DON'T MAKE ANY PLANS FOR AT LEAST 2 WEEKS 'CAUSE YOU'LL NEED THAT TIME IN THE HOSPITAL!!! I'll let you in on a few things...see my boys aren't all there up top...some people would call them crazy....but not to their faces!!! Don't upset them. If you do then I can't be held responsible for your medical bills. Challengers??? I understand the IIWF has some....WELL STEP UP TO THE BAT PEONS!!! Nothing my boys love more than a challenge." [Fade] And let's take a look at their stats: PAIN INC. Origin: Jakarta, Indonesia Manager: Mr. Mic Theme Music: "More Human Than Human" White Zombie Orientation: Heel Wrestler: MORNINGSTAR HELLRAISER Weight: 280 lbs 305lbs Height: 6'4" 6'5" Appearance: Wears a pure black robe upon Hellraiser wears red karate entering the ring. His head pants to the ring and a red and neck are covered by a robe with the same chain chain mail mask with only 2 mail mask Morningstar wears. eyeholes. In the ring he His face has the Japanese wears black karate pants symbols for life and death and in red paint on his face in black, one on each cheek. he has the Japanese symbols for death and life one on each cheek. Five Moves: 1. Spinning heel kick 1. Superkick 2. belly-to-belly suplex 2. Powerslam 3. Asai moonsault 3. Flying Lariat 4. Asian spike 4. Flying Leg Drop (thumb to the throat) 5. karate chop 5. Piledriver Finishing Move: Moonsault Primary Attributes: 1. Endurance 1. Teamwork 2. Aerial 2. Strength 3. Teamwork 3. Brawling Tag team finisher: Simply Pain - Morningstar jumps from the top rope onto the opponent who is up in a power bomb -- essentially a spike power bomb. Profiles: Morningstar is considered borderline psychotic, always focuses on the match and never get involved with fans. His two sole purposes in life are to beat the living crap out of his opponents and to win. He never speaks, letting his manager do the talking for him. He keeps a piece of metal in his trunks to use as a foreign object which he likes to use when the match is not going his way. His manager, Mr.Mic, is a loudmouth who loves to get involved in matches using a roll of quarters he keeps with him. When Morningstar gets mad he usually wrestles better than when he is fine, he flies into a rage always taking it out on his opponent. Hellraiser is the powerhouse of the team. He is without a doubt a very sadistic person. His greatest pleasures in life are to main opposing wrestlers and to become tag-team champions. He only listens to Mr. Mic and has a high threshold of pain... it almost seems to make him stronger. He is similar to Psycho Sid in that he almost never blinks. His greatest weakness lies in that he will sometimes get in a verbal fight with the fans, but not too often. He as well keeps a foreign object in his pants, a taped up set of brass knuckles. He will sometimes speak but usually lets Mr.Mic talk for him. [Handler: Mickey Eccles (meccles@axionet.com)] The second new team to arrive here in the IIWF is the Arabian Knights. Let's hear from them now: [Camera cuts to a darkened room, the sound of a match being struck can be heard and the room starts to brighten, three figures can be seen, a huge bald monster of a man stands in the background holding a lantern, two other figures can be seen in the foreground -- one dressed in the robes of an Arab prince the other all in black.] Prince: So this is the IIWF... what can I say? I am unimpressed, they all said, "Prince, join the IIWF -- you will get some real competition." So here we are in the land of the infidels and I have seen nothing that come anywhere near our level... noone that will be able to compete with us. For example I was watching the Tag Team Championship Match between the.... [The Prince turns to the figure dressed in black next to him and they exchange a few words.] Prince: ...between the High Plains Drifters and the Armed Forces and I was extremely disappointed with what I saw: two teams of slow, unfit overweight wrestlers with a distinct lack of wrestling acumen. Is this supposed to be the best that the IIWF has to offer? If so it will be an easy task for us to win the gold......I cannot bear to talk to these infidel pigs anymore. Vizier, you explain. [With that, the Prince walks out of shot leaving Omar and the Vizier.] Vizier: We have come here for one reason and one reason alone: to win the IIWF Tag Team belts and return with them to our homeland, to show our people how easy it is to go to the countries of the infidels and return with one of their most prized trophies. We do not care who we meet, we do not care if we break a few bones or even put other people out of wrestling for good but we will be victorious -- of that you can be guaranteed. [The Vizier pauses.] Vizier: So who is our first match against? Ah yes a team that goes under the name of Pain Inc. Well, we have never heard of you and no one is likely to hear from you again after you step into the ring with the Arabian Knights, so come this Saturday Night we will make an example of you and show the rest of the IIWF what they are up against..... SO BE PREPARED FOR THE ARABIAN KNIGHTS, BE PREPARED FOR THE JIHAD ........you have been warned.... [The Vizier turns to Omar who grins insanely and blows the lantern out, once again returning the room to darkness.] Let's take a look at their stats: THE ARABIAN KNIGHTS Origin: Ar Riyad, Saudi Arabia Manager/Valet: The Grand Vizier Theme Music: Theme from the Arabian Knights Orientation: heel PRINCE ABDUL AKBAR Height: 6'1" Weight: 225lbs Appearance: Prince Abdul Akbar comes dressed to the ring in the garb of an Arab prince, he is always immaculate and walks round with an air of arrogance. In the ring he fights wearing gold wrestling pants tied with a black sash. He will always come out to the ring first followed by Omar and The Grand Vizier. Five Favorite Moves: 1. Dropkick 2. Sunset Flip 3. Flying Forearm 4. Frankensteiner 5. Indian Deathlock Finishing Move: Ropeflip Moonsault Primary attributes: 1. Technical 2. Endurance 3. Aerial OMAR Weight: 370lbs Height: 6' 6" Appearance: Omar is a monster of a man, his head is completely shaved, his left eye is false and he has a scar that runs down the left hand side of his face comes to the ring wearing baggy black pants tied with a gold sash. Five Favorite Moves: 1. Swinging Punch 2. Bearhug 3. Chokehold 4. Belly-To-Belly Suplex 5. Powerbomb Finishing Move: Full Nelson Primary attributes: 1. Strength 2. Brawling 3. Cheating Tag team finisher: Jihad - Omar will get the opponent in a full nelson and Prince Abdul will deliver a kick to the opponent's head. Profile: The Arabian Knights were reputedly the Middle Eastern wrestling champions before coming to the IIWF... whether this is true is open to question as no record of their achievements can be found. The team consists of Prince Abdul Akbar and his former(?) bodyguard Omar, they are always occumpainied by a strange individual known only as the Grand Vizier. The Prince is very arrogant and treats everyone, with the exception of his two compatriots, with disdain, but it is obvious that the Grand Vizier is the brains behind the team. They do though appear to work well as a tag team, the Prince is the much smaller of the two and likes to use a combination of speed and high impact manuevers to humiliate and destroy his opponents while Omar is a much larger individual who likes to crush his opponents, wearing them down and squeezing every last breath out of them. Omar has never been known to utter a word and it's is doubtful that he would ever submit to a submission manuever, although he will resort to cheating to stop the Prince from being humiliated. [Handler: Neil Marshall (neil@basford.demon.co.uk)] And finally, let's meet Scorpio and Taurus, the Zodiac Connection: THE ZODIAC CONNECTION Origin: From the streets of Hollywood, CA. Manager/Valet: Dr. Insane Theme Music: Bone Thugs and Harmony's "East 1999" Orientation: face Wrestler: SCORPIO TAURUS Weight: 225lbs 350lbs Height: 6'1" 6'8" Appearance: Scorpio wears a black mask Taurus enters the arena with gold scorpions on each wearing a bull's head mask cheek. African-American. and takes it off to reveal Wears black leather pants. a silver mask with black bulls on each cheek. African-American. Wears black leather pants. Five moves: 1. Dropkick 1. Football tackle 2. Asai moonsault 2. Chokeslam 3. Flying headscissors 3. Powerbomb 4. Frankensteiner from the 4. Tombstone top rope 5. elbow smash 5. Snapmare Tag team finisher: The Zodiac Splash - Taurus throws Scorpio on top of opponent (rocket launcher) Primary attributes: 1. Endurance 1. Strength 2. Aerial 2. Brawling 3. Teamwork 3. Teamwork Profile: Scorpio does most of the talking for the group. Both do charity work at home. [Handler: Jason Wyland (jwyland@csulb.edu)] The IIWF Front Office will soon be closing the rosters, so next week should see the last new arrivals here for some time. I'll keep you updated. Departures ~~~~~~~~~~ Rumours continue to fly around the IIWF that Brad Kinder may be about to retire. I've been unable to contact "Bodybag" to ask him, but I will continue in my efforts to reach him. However, there are a couple of departures which are no longer rumours, but true: - Crimson Storm, the mysterious light heavyweight, has parted company with the IIWF as silently as he arrived. We never found out exactly what his agenda was, but I believe there is some connection between him and Blackjack Haley, who is currently missing in action. - The Posse may have ceased to exist as we know it, since the Crippler will be leaving the IIWF after this weekend. Rumours suggest that the breakdown in his contractual talks was due to his refusal to accept that Flare, the man about whom the Crippler had an obsession for which he was treated some time ago, has left the IIWF. One informer suggested that the Crippler wanted it written into his contract that he could face Flare at least twice a week in the ring. Mad. Latest Rankings ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An omission meant that the rankings were erroneously missing from Tuesday's update, but I shall remedy that forthwith: ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Name F/H Fought W L D Win% Ranking (old) new ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Deathbringer F 15 11 2 2 80% (WC) WC Tiger Claw H 18 10 7 1 58% (IC) IC Vacant - - - - - - (-) CW ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Outlaw J.W. Hardin H 13 9 2 2 77% (2=) 1 Billy Shakespeare F 12 9 3 0 75% (4) 2 Vinny Cappicola F 6 4 1 1 75% (6) 3 Dan Kauffman F 14 9 3 2 71% (2=) 4 Billy Sexton H 10 7 3 0 70% (1) 5 Hakiro Matsuoko H 10 6 3 1 65% (5) 7 Don Antonio F 10 6 4 0 60% (8) 8 Brad "Bodybag" Kinder H 17 9 7 1 56% (9) 9 Casey James H 13 6 5 2 54% (12) 10 Man Of Steel F 16 7 7 2 50% (22) 11 Blackjack Haley H 15 6 6 3 50% (10) 12 Simon Lebec H 12 6 6 0 50% (11) 13 Joe Latta H 11 5 5 1 50% (13=) 14 Robski H 10 5 5 0 50% (16) 15 The Hangman H 7 3 3 1 50% (17) 16 The Punster F 7 3 3 1 50% (24) 17 The Sandman H 4 2 2 0 50% (18) 18= "Enigma" Takezo Musashi N 4 2 2 0 50% (27) 18= "Badboy" Randy Acorn H 3 1 1 1 50% (19=) 20= Prisoner #109 H 3 1 1 1 50% (19=) 20= Marty Warnett F 2 1 1 0 50% (19=) 22 Fisto Flash H 12 5 6 1 46% (13=) 23 Prince of Darkness H 12 4 5 3 46% (15) 24 Magus H 7 3 4 0 43% (23) 25 The Crippler H 8 3 5 0 38% (26) 26 Mr. Damage H 6 2 4 0 33% (25) 27 "Nuclear" John Bomber F 6 1 5 0 17% (28) 28 ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Chris Quigley F 3 3 0 0 100% (29=) 29 Otto Verhoeven H 2 2 0 0 100% (29=) 30 Sabin Figaro F 1 1 0 0 100% (-) 31 Pale Rider H 2 0 2 0 0% (31=) 32 Crimson Storm F 3 0 3 0 0% (31=) 33 Archangel F - - - - - (-) - ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Subway Psycho is strangely missing from that listing; I was unable to get any conclusive comments from the Front Office, but it is possible that the Psycho has terminated his IIWF contract and disappeared back into the subways of New York. More news as and when we get it. Meanwhile, let's take a look at the tag team rankings: ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Name of team F/H Fought W L D Win% Ranking (old) new ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Armed Forces H 7 6 1 0 86% (WT) WT ------------------------------------------------------------------------ High Plains Drifters H 14 10 4 0 71% (1) 1 Stunt Team USA F 13 8 5 0 62% (2) 2 Atomic Destroyers H 9 4 4 1 50% (3) 3 Steamroller F 7 2 5 0 29% (4) 4 Law & Disorder F 5 1 4 0 20% (5) 5 ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Heavy Metal H 4 4 0 0 100% (6) 6 Rising Sun Revolution F 4 4 0 0 100% (7) 7 Aces of the Deep F 1 1 0 0 100% (-) 8 The Arabian Knights H - - - - - (-) - Pain Inc. H - - - - - (-) - ------------------------------------------------------------------------ IIWF Midweek Mayhem - 11 September 1996 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This Wednesday's card will originate from Atlanta's Omni, as the IIWF begins its second national tour. We know that we'll see the finals of the Cruiserweight Tournament, and the following other matches have been signed: - Dan Kauffman vs. Casey "Blackheart" James - "Badboy" Randy Acorn vs. Vinny Cappicola More matches will be announced over the next few days, and I'll bring you the complete run down in Tuesday's report. The Dross Report ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Quite a situation seems to be brewing between the former IC champ, Hakiro Matsuoko, and one of the many newcomers to the IIWF, the "Enigma" Takezo Musashi. It seems there is quite a history between these men -- to get to the bottom of it, Kenny Tanaka, that snivelling little brown-tonguer, went to get comments from Hakiro in the depths of the Dojo: [SCENE: Kenny Tanaka stands in front of a black curtain, behind which smoke pours out.] KT: I'm in the basement of the Dojo where the men sometimes come to meditate. Apparently, Hakiro has been spending a lot of time here as of late, and I'm here to find out why. Here we go... [Kenny pushes aside the curtain to reveal a dimly lit room. There is a circle of candles on the floor, at the centre of which sits Hakiro Matsuoko in a lotus position with his back to Kenny. Incense burns from a censer in the corner.] HM: What is it you want, Kenny? KT: I was hoping to get some comments from you about what transpired at Midweek Mayhem. HM: I beat Dan Kauffman to advance to the finals of the Cruiserweight tournament. Kauffman fought with dishonour, and in the end, the balance was restored. I fought like a true warrior, and I prevailed. My friend Tiger Claw has been eliminated, so it is up to me to bring glory to this house by winning that title. KT: Actually, Hakiro, I was hoping that you would shed some light on your altercation with Takezo Musashi. HM: I guess it is time to reveal the truth. Musashi is sure to spread some filthy lies about the connection we have. KT: So there have been some past dealings between you two? HM: Listen to my tale, and decide for yourself... [Hakiro takes a deep breath and begins.] HM: Long ago, when I was a child growing up in a town just outside of Tokyo, I was alone. My parents were taken from me, and I was left to fend for myself. I would have become nothing more than a street urchin had it not been for the kindness shown to me by a man known only as the Grandmaster. This man was skilled in almost every form of martial arts known to the outside world, along with a few that were "secret." He realized that in order for his craft to continue its legacy, he would need to pass it on to someone. He chose two young boys to learn these arts. I was one of them. Takezo Musashi was the other. We grew up in the home of the Grandmaster, doing chores and learning the intricacies of what he had to offer. We grew up as his children, and Musashi and I began to look upon each other as brothers. We began with the basic katas of Shotokan Karate, then moved on to the motions of Tai Chi. The Grandmaster showed us the basics of all that he knew so that we might build upon them easily. You see, the Grandmaster had created a style of his own. Like Bruce Lee's Jeet Kune Do, this art was a form without form, a way without way. It borrowed elements from many different schools, including wrestling. It was this hybrid style that Musashi and I were learning. Once the foundation of the base arts were learned, we began building upon them. The Grandmaster would put us through a series of tests that would teach us more aspects of the art as we passed them. These tests were not only of body, but of mind and spirit as well. We learned how to manipulate our bodies so that we could use them as weapons. In time, we could hurt, injure, or even cripple a man with a single touch. We also learned how to make it so we could seem to fly through the air with ease, able to twist and turn as we saw fit. The Grandmaster had made it clear that these skills were not to be squandered, and to be used only to defend one's self. It was then that he had told us of the Starsault Press. At the time when he first told us of it, he spoke as if it were legend. Mere stories of the impossible that men dreamed of doing one day when they evolved past the shells of their existence. As time went on and we learned more, we wondered what had made the Starsault so incredible. The Grandmaster said it was not a task of the body. Any fool could learn to do the motions, but only a true master could grasp the elements that made the maneuver effective. He made it clear that only when a man's mind, spirit, and body were in perfect alignment would he be able to do such a spectacular attack. He then demonstrated it to us. You have to understand, Kenny, we had believed that this technique was fictional. We were speechless as we watched our teacher, our master, our _father_ fly through the air like a wonderous dragon. We both wanted to learn, but he had deemed us not ready. We had much to learn. In my 18th year, Takezo and I were ready. We had learned the techniques that made us masters of our bodies, minds and spirits. In the time it took us to learn these skills, our master had grown old. I had noticed some of the things he said made no sense, and I feared that his mind was growing feeble. Imagine that, Kenny. The very man who tought us this almost superhuman control was losing control of his own faculties. It was almost as if his mind were a jug filled with water that he had poured into our glasses for us to ingest, yet leaving none for himself. On the day he decided to teach the secrets of the Starsault press, he made an odd request. He told us that only one of us could learn these skills, and we would have to meet each other in combat. I did not know whether this was a test, or just further evidence that the man was losing his mind. We obliged, and met each other in the courtyard with the old man watching. You see, Takezo and I had never met like this before. In the past, we had to practice some combat techniques on each other, but we were never competing. We were working together to reach a common goal. Now it was different. There was a prize, and what a glorious prize it was. We competed against each other for the first time. We fought for hours. We used maneuvers from every art we knew. Trust me, Kenny, if this encounter were caught on film, the theatres would be sold out every night to cater to the martial arts fans. Akido, Gung Fu, Wing Tsung, Shotokan, Savate, WuShu, Hapkido, Muay Thai, it was all there. We had learned so much that it all came out with ease. I must admit, I was dazzled by the prospect of becoming the true master of my art, which was all arts, yet none. We had fought for 2 straight days, but our conditioning allowed us to stay free of fatigue. On the night of the second day, I bested Takezo. I was going to learn the secrets that few men had the honor to keep. I was going to be a master, like the Grandmaster before me. Or so it seemed. Takezo began to cry about how I had used a maneuver on him that the Grandmaster had tought us, yet never wanted us to use. He saw it as dishonourable. It was at that point that I was sure the old man was feebleminded, because he sided with Takezo. I was banished from the Grandmaster's house the following night. I was once again left to fend for myself. Only this time, I had the tools to take care of myself. How can a master of one's own existence fail in the world? I toured Japan, but the news of my shame had actually made it's was across the island. I was forced to leave, and so I went to the United States to try my hand at one of the greatest sports in the world, professional wrestling. This is how I came to the IIWF. My actions here are already known, so I shall skip ahead to the point where I lost the IC belt to Tiger Claw. I left the IIWF for a short time, and returned to my native Japan. My shame had been mostly forgotten due to my success in the States. I toured the circuit to find a man I recognised. That man was Takezo Musashi. I felt the swell of anger grow in the pit of my stomach as I watched him display the feats he had learned from the Grandmaster in the ring. I noticed some techniques I did not know, and I assumed that they were taught to him after I was banished. Then I saw him do it. The Starsault Press. I went back to my hotel, and waiting for me was a message from Brian Lau. He got me at the best time, too, because I knew at that point I was missing something. A power I had left untapped. My warrior soul. Brian has guided me to reclaim the fire that burns in me now, and lately I have been working on the techniques taught to me by the Grandmaster. My mind, body, and soul are aligned, and I am a new man. I shall show the world this ability when I next enter the ring. I shall unveil a new technique that will equal the Starsault. Like any true master, I have become my own teacher, building on the skills the Grandmaster taught me using the warrior soul that Brian has shown me to be the answer. Musashi shall one day feel this technique, which shall be named the Butsumetsu Drop. Call this a battle between darkness and light if you will. I shall be content to think of it as a doorway to the next plane of ascension that I require to become Master. KT: What of your membership in the Syndicate? HM: I am still a member of the Syndicate if the Syndicate will have me. Brian is the reason I am able to do what must be done. I owe him my life. I shall never forget that. KT: Thank you, Hakiro. That was a very interesting story. Unfortunately, that's all the time we have for today. HM: I must get back to my studies anyway. KT: I will leave you to yourself then, Hakiro. This is Kenny Tanaka for the Syndicate saying so long, everybody! [Fade] As you might expect, the Enigma tells a slightly different story. Let's get his comments: [SCENE: The Enigma stands in his training centre.] TM: I see that the time has finally come. I see that the Gods of War have finally called for the time of battle. The stars and planets of the cosmos are in alignment, the greatest test of my life is upon me. From the first moment I entered the IIWF, I watched my old nemisis from afar. I pondered when he would choose the moment to strike, I could sense the inevitably. The last time I saw him, I watched as he left our dojo, his head hung in shame. There was a fierce storm raging that night in Tokyo, and as he dissapeared into the torrential rain, I knew we would meet again. It could have been in another life, or another dimension, but the forces of vengeance are strong, and they have determined our fate lies together on this battle ground, the battle ground of the IIWF! Hakiro Matsuoko, you know deep in your twisted soul that your words are forked, you seek to distort the truth and turn the tides against me. When we did battle those fateful days we took ourselves to the limit of our hearts and bodies. The combat could have gone either way, but your base emotions, your greed and lust for power overtook you. Your inability to defeat me gnawed deep inside and you became frustrated as the battle wore on. Forgetting the teachings of the Grandmaster, you threw aside sportsmanship, and in doing so threw aside the art of the martial spirit. You sought to injure me with forbidden moves, in your lust for victory you attempted to cripple me, instead of achieving victory cleanly. You know inside of yourself that the Grandmaster was of sound mind that day -- how can a man who is completely devoted to spirit be otherwise? When he stopped the match and awarded me the victory, you know that his decision was guided by truth. But in your tortured heart, you refuse to accept this, for it was always the way with you, Hakiro Matsuoko, always seeking the easy path instead of the path gained by discipline. Always wanting to grasp the whole World in your hands at once. I remember well how you would constantly pressure the Grandmaster to teach us the secret of the Starsault before we were ready. Hakiro Matsuoko, you will never learn the secret of the Starsault. Only those of pure spirit can attain the inner strength to use it. Your dark side has plagued you for too long now Matsuoko, you are consumed with thoughts of vengenace, and this impurity of spirit will be your downfall. Angel of the Rising Sun! When we clash once more, I will prove my dominance convincingly. I will cleanse the dishonour you have brought upon the Grandmaster. Deep inside your black heart you know that you cannot defeat me, my hands will be raised in triumph and glory! And you, Matsuoko, will bow your head in shame once more..... [Fade] Well, folks, I don't know what to say in response to all of that. However, what I do know is this: Hakiro Matsuoko is a fantastic competitor who was the first to climb the mountain and taste Intercontinental gold in the IIWF. His record speaks for itself. Although his attitude under Brian Lau has been, at times, deplorable, he remains one of the most exciting and athletic competitors in the IIWF, driven by an inner fire, the source of which we had never known -- until now. Now we know of Matsuoko's past, and we know of the jealousy that has taken him to the top. However, now his nemesis, the "Enigma" Takezo Musashi, has also come to the dance, will Hakiro be consumed by that fire, or will he be able to channel it towards the Enigma? The secret of the Starsault Press is something indeed, but the deeper issue here is one of honour, a notion which us in the West at times struggle to understand. It runs deeper than titles, deeper than wins and losses, deeper even than life itself. It is better to die with honour than to live in shame. Hakiro has lived in shame, and lived with his shame -- the Enigma has lived with honour. Who knows what is going to transpire between these two old foes? We'll find out in the weeks to come. Next Report ~~~~~~~~~~~ That just about wraps things up for today, folks, but I'll be back at you tomorrow night, live from the IIWF Coliseum, for another dose of IIWF Saturday Night action. The next report will be, as usual, on Tuesday, when I'll be bringing you all the latest news, comments and results from the superstars of the IIWF. Until then, this is Tim Dross, saying: so long, everybody! +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | Send mail to iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk with the subject lines: | | "send faq" for the FAQ + "send singles" or "send tag" for the | | rosters + "send handlers" for a list of handlers | +------------------------------------+---------------------------------+ | URL: http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk/ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+