##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== Control Centre Update - 27 September 1996 ----------------------------------------------- [Tim Dross swivels round to face the camera as the opening graphics fade, turning away from the bank of video monitors behind him, which show various recent events from IIWF shows.] Hello there, folks, and welcome once again to my home away from home, the IIWF's humble little mobile Control Centre for this week's Friday update. We're here in Phoenix, Arizona, in preparation for tomorrow night's live event, and the weather isn't looking too great -- but you're not interested in meteorology; you're interested in action! And we've got a whole lot of that to talk about here today, particularly the latest astonishing twist in the saga between Deathbringer and the Outlaw J.W. Hardin... Plus, also in today's report: - a complete run-down of all Wednesday night's action - a look ahead to tomorrow night's fantastic Saturday Night showdowns - hearing from all the IIWF superstars - a look at the latest rankings - an update on the card for Ring Wars II and in my Dross Report, I'll be taking a closer look at the Outlaw's "secret weapon". All that to come today, so let's get straight to it! IIWF Midweek Mayhem - 25 September 1996 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Originating live from the Spectrum, Philadelphia, Wednesday night's action has people all over the world buzzing. Let's run down the results: 1. The HIGH PLAINS DRIFTERS scored a victory over the ACES OF THE DEEP, Sam "Shark" Summers going down to the double-team "Hang 'em High" clothesline. 2. The ZODIAC CONNECTIOn defeated the BILL COLLECTORS with the Zodiac Splash rocket launcher. In the wake of another dismal performance, the Bill Collectors have been fired by the IIWF front office, and will make no further appearances. 3. FISTO FLASH destroyed "NUCLEAR" JOHN BOMBER, and was clearly in a very bad mood as he battered Bomber all over the ring, putting him out of his misery with the Knucklebomb. 4. JOE LATTA defeated RON FIRE, one half of Stunt Team USA, with the Shotgun Suplex, and after the match, the ring was mysteriously illuminated by a red cross, the symbol associated with the Archangel. It seems that Archangel wants to play a few mind games with Latta. Stunt Team USA's manager, the Wizard, is also still playing his mind games with his team: [SCENE: Belgarath is in the training gym with Ron and Steve. The football is still hanging high above the ring] RF: "Yo, Wizard, now what was this match with Latta all about? Ya wanted to get me beaten, or what?" BM: "No, noble knight, it seems as if you overreact a little bit. I just wanted to show you that you can't exist without the help of your comrade, Sir Forget." SF: "Ya think Ron's weak or what?" BM: "No, but he's born to be a dragonslayer, and those few who drive fear into the wild beasts' hearts... however they don't walk alone, they always have friends on their side. The main fact I wanted to show to you is that you're a team, not single competitors!" RF: "Guess I learned that now... What about this football task?" BM: "You haven't solved it yet..." SF: "I don't quite understand ya, Wizard, on the one hand you say we're a team, on the other hand you say we're not allowed to work together on this task..." BM: "That's why it's a hard task, the ultimate quest... Think about it..." [With these words he leaves the gym and leaves Ron and Steve once again alone. Fade] 5. "PAINBRINGER" BILLY SEXTON outwrestled EL SUPER GECKO and forced him to submit to his armbar submission hold. More interesting than the match was the arrival in the aisle of the manager of the Arabian Knights, the Grand Vizier, who appeared to be scouting Sexton. 6. DEATHBRINGER defeated LOUIE THE NINJA in what was not such a one-sided contest as you might imagine. The Ninja hit a few offensive moves in the course of this one, but nothing that really rocked the champion, who downed Louie with the Burial. 7. MR. DAMAGE scored a countout victory over MARTY WARNETT when SIMON LEBEC came down to the ring with the spoils of last Saturday Night's haircutting exercise, enraging Marty so much that he charged down the aisle to confront his enemy. However, Lebec was more than prepared for the attack, and KO'd Marty with brass knuckles before cutting a little more hair from the prone Welshman, allowing Mr. Damage to merely sit back in the ring and wait for victory to be handed to him on a silver platter. 8. Despite threatening the Prisoner Execution throughout the match, PRISONER #109 couldn't quite match up to nemesis "BADBOY" RANDY ACORN in what was their final showdown. In the end, Acorn hit the Newark Knife cloverleaf for the win. 9. VINNY CAPPICOLA's match with THE HANGMAN ended in a no-contest when Fisto Flash attacked the big Texan with his own noose, clocking him with the cowbell and ensnaring him in the deadly rope before dragging him around the ring. It was a horrible display, but thankfully, the Hangman is not seriously injured, and will be on hand tomorrow night. He will have the all-clear to wrestle again by midweek. 10. In a wild Texas Tornado match, PAIN INC. doubleteamed their way to victory over the ARABIAN KNIGHTS, finally finishing their opponents off with their Simply Pain spike powerbomb. Although during the course of the match, Mr. Mic had nailed the Grand Vizier with a roll of quarters, after the bell, the Grand Vizier blew some strange blue powder into the eyes of Mr. Mic, temporarily blinding. However, no lasting damage has been done, and Mr. Mic will be at ringside for his men's next match. In fact, I went to visit Mr. Mic, and found him in good health: [SCENE: Outside Mr. Mic's mansion. Tim Dross is with a cameraman, Dross knocks at the front door. A 6'8" butler answers the door sneering at Dross and the cameraman.] Butler: YES!!! TD [after gulping]: Hello, Tim Dross from the IIWF here to interview Mr.Mic... Butler: Just a moment. [He pulls out a walkie-talkie] Butler: [into the walkie-talkie] Sir, a Mr.Dross is here for an interview [Mr.Mic's voice come out from the walkie-talkie] Mr.Mic: Thank you Damien, please show the moron to poolside..... [The Butler laughs] Butler: Follow me [Dross and the cameraman follow Damien out to poolside where Mr.Mic is seated with Pain Inc. they are sitting on chaise lounges. Hellraiser and Morningstar are wearing jeans, t-shirts and sunglasses. Mr.Mic is in an Armani suit] Mr.Mic: Sit down, Dross, you're lucky I even do this interview for you. TD: Listen here Mr.Mic..... [Hellraiser and Morningstar jump to their feet and walk over to Dross, Mr.Mic gets in their way, calms them down by whispering something to them and they head inside the mansion] Mr.Mic: Ha Ha Dross a wise man once said, "Never challenge the man who holds all the cards". TD: [catching his breath] I will say one thing for them -- they certainly are loyal. Mr.Mic: Aren't they? [he says smiling] TD: Let's start this interview... Mr.Mic how do you feel after your victory last night? Mr.Mic: Well Tim I dunno we feel kinda bad that somebody had to lo... HOW THE HELL DO YA THINK I FEEL...GREAT!!! I warned the 7-11 Knights time and time again not to cross Pain Inc. but they just wouldn't listen and they had to pay the price, as does any team AND I MEAN ANY TEAM that wants to cross Pain Inc. TD: Oh, even though you cheated???? Mr.Mic: Dross, I am two seconds away from calling back Pain Inc....trust me you don't want me to do that. Just call ESPN I'm sure they'd love to warn you!!! TD: Hey, none of that now!!! We saw you throw brass knuckles to Hellraiser!!! Mr.Mic: Hey, I dunno what you're talking about....hell you weren't even at the match, bozo! I didn't give Hellraiser anything...they won on skill, agility, and knowledge -- simple as that. TD: Now what's this. You have a message for the President? Mr.Mic: Yeah, hey President Spreadbury, I hear you ramblin' off all these "great" matches for Ring Wars II... I even heard you deny my Pain Inc. a chance at the Armed Forces, for which THEY thank you, I wanna know when we can expect to hear about Pain Inc. in a match at Ring Wars II?? I think RWII deserves to have a tag team of Pain Inc.'s status on the card, so how 'bout it?! TD: Anything up for the near future? Mr.Mic: Yeah, I'd kind of like a shot at the Aces of the Deep. These two fisheads are in need of some Simply Pain........ TD: Thank you, Mr.Mic... Mr.Mic: Yes you should!!!! [Fade] 11. DON ANTONIO was victorious by disqualification over THE SANDMAN, who had brought both Brian Lau and Miss Victoria Secret -- although now more accurately Mrs. Victoria Flare -- down to the ring with him. It was a great match, marred ultimately by Tiger Claw striking the Don in the head with his now dreaded baseball bat. Thankfully, Vinny Cappicola's timely arrival prevented any serious damage, and the Sandman seemed less than happy with Brian Lau about the loss. [SCENE: Close up of the stunning Victoria Secret. Camera pans back to reveal she is sitting in a throne beside the Sandman.] VS: Welcome to the Dark Knights' castle. As you know I am Victoria Secret, and this is the Sandman. TD: Isn't it wonderful... the combined talents of evil? Can it be so sweet? The awnser to both is yes. [Victoria looks over and smiles] I am the bringer of death to all faces, the archangel of evil and the everlasting enigma. Darkness will reign supreme at Ring Wars II and there's nothing anyone can do about it. If there is any doubt about my loyalty, I will say this, I am loyal to one side and that's how it is and that's how it's supposed to be. VS: Mmmmmm, you're so right. What about the confrontation with Brian Lau after the match and what about the things he said earlier in the week? TS: Mr. Lau I hear what you're saying and I assure you there is nothing between us. You have my respect and that goes a long way. You don't have to question my mentality, everything is as simple as black and white. At War Games, I will be at a 100 percent, but if we meet sometime in the future, it will be only business and business is never personal. I think I've made my point clear. The gesture you made to my fellow Knight is well apperciated. The Prince of Darkness is an outstanding wrestler as well as Tiger Claw, but the conclusion of that match was sketchy. You made a wise descision and someday I will return the favor. This I promise, 'cause all I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don't break em' for nobody. As for the Midweek Mayhem, we are quite a team. Hopefully we will work together again in the near future. VS: So that's that, and the air is clear. Brian, are we seeing eye to eye now? Sandman, what about those punk faces and Ring Wars II? TS: At War Games, I weep for those opposing us. The Man of Steel has no idea what he's up against. I look at my teammates and I know destruction is at hand. This War Games will go down in history as the biggest slaughter. This will be no ordinary PPV, it will simply be a struggle for the faces to survive. Not only are we the heels going to dominate War Games, the Outlaw will shock the world during the casket match. All eyes will be on this one. I wouldn't be surprised to see strange things happen here. Deathbringer, I am watching you, one slip up and you're mine! VS: Now I suppose the IIWF is wondering why I'm with the Sandman and not my man Flare. [she smiles] It's simple this, business. [her face becomes very serious] There is a lot of mystery surrounding the Sandman and the Dark Knights. Why hire me and for what? Any assoications with Flare and will he be a Knight? Where are the Dark Knights? Sandman..... TS: Let me begin with this, I know Victoria's secret [she turns to hi and grins] she's a great manager and quite honestly, she makes champions. [she nods] I hold the highest respect for Flare, but he is no Knight and never will be. As far as the Dark Knights, they are all around.....just look closely. [Victoria looks at the camera with a devious smirk and it fades out.] Meanwhile, back at the Syndicate: [SCENE: Outside the Spectrum on Wednesday night. The Syndicate is making their way to a limo.] KT: Hold on a sec, guys... Do you mind if I get an interview from you? BL: Oh, I suppose... What is it? KT: Well, we saw a bit of the Syndicate earlier tonight. Can you tell me your feelings of what happened and what is to happen? And where's Hakiro? BL: Hakiro's back at Josey Wales ranch... He went off into the countryside to meditate and beat up coyotes or something. This whole thing with Musashi really has him riled up. Anyway, Joe beat that second-rate Sabin Figaro fairly easily tonight, but then that Archangel person decided to throw his weight around. The Archangel seems to think that he's got a problem with Joe Latta and the rest of the Syndicate. Well, Archangel has a chance to get it out of his system when he faces Casey James on Saturday night. This Archangel is a big man, but he'll go down to the Blackheart punch, right, Casey? CJ: That's right, Brian. And after I put him down with that, he's going to taste the Black Death. Big man, what do you think I've been doing in the gym? Do you think I look like this because I sit chugging beers like Man of Steel? I can bench a good 450 pounds in my sleep, so it's not going to be a problem slamming you through the mat. BL: I noticed you mentioned some of Man Of Steel's spare time activities, Casey. Kenny, we have some news regarding Man Of Steels accident, and we'd like you to do an interview with us on Saturday night. KT: Really? Well, sure! I'd be honoured! BL: Great. On another note, Joe will be facing Chris Quigley on Saturday. JL: Just when I thought I did away with one big mouth, there's another to take his place. Quigley, you cost me one of the falls in my match against Dan Kauffman, and I'm not exactly happy with that. On Saturday, I'm going to beat on you like you've never been beaten on before. I know your song, Quigley. You remind me a lot of Dan Kauffman. Let's just hope you're not as lucky as that punk. When I lift you up in that Shotgun Suplex, you're going to know that you're in the ring with one of the best in the IIWF. You're also going to understand what makes those of us in the Syndicate better than everyone else in the IIWF. BL: That's correct. Quigley has been going on and on about his talents. Joe Latta is going to show him what real talent is in the IIWF. For example, there's the Intercontinental champion, Tiger Claw. We'll all get to see him in action against that mockery to our culture, Louie the Ninja. This is not exactly the most challenging opponent Tiger Claw has ever faced, but it's a chance to beat on someone. Tiger Claw has been training to face Don Antonio on October 12, so I'm sure we'll all get to see the benefits of that training. Hey, Don... How are those ribs? [Tiger Claw laughs and mocks Antonio, holding his side and limping around, muttering "Mamma Mia!"] BL: Hehehe... Well, there's one thing I still need to address, and that's the rantings of the Shinja Chow. He has been talking about my father. Chow, don't even pretend to think that you are worthy to speak of my father. My father was a great man. He had the best mind for business that I have ever known. I learned everything I know from him. He had connections all over the continent of Asia. Don't you ever try and put a mark on my father's reputation. Maybe you need someone to teach you a lesson, and I know just the men that can do it. KT: I hope the Chow fellow stops, because I just get so angry hearing him trying to make your family sound bad, Brian. [Casey and Joe make kiss-ass noises in the background, and Brian just barely manages to keep from laughing. Kenny is oblivious.] BL: Well, that's very nice, Kenny... We've really got to get going. I'm sure you understand. KT: Can I ride with you guys? BL: Ummm... Well, there's really no room here... Tell you what. Catch a cab, and we'll meet you at the hotel, okay? KT: Sure thing, guys! Okay, folks! Until next time, so long, everybody! [The shot fades as Brian Lau is heard saying to the limo driver "No, not the hotel... Take us to a good sushi bar... If such a thing exsists in this god forsaken city."] And finally, before we leave discussion of this match, let's drop in for a quick bite of Dinner With The Don: [SCENE: Dinna Wit Da Don is taking place at Diamante Ristorante in downtown Rome] DA: Welcome once again to Dinna Wit Da Don. I'm glad to say that I have fully recuperated from my match with Tiger Claw, and also from his little attack on Wedneday night. So the Sandman isn't tough enough to take the Don down on his own, huh? Although we do respect you as a technical wrestler, the fact still remains that your morals must be questioned. Prepare for Ring Wars 2 my friend. Although I am quite the powerful man, I am still nothing compared to the MOS, Vinny, Quigley, Kauffman, and the rest of the forces of good all put together. United we stand, divided we fall and evil, as we all know, can not unite. Ring Wars 2 will be a triumph for all good. Deathbringer will beat the Outlaw, I will triumph and become a 2 time IC champ, and the MOS and crew will be victorious, not to mention, Marty will keep his hair. VC: Oh yeah! Hangman, get outta my way punk. Vinny Cappicola is on a mission to kick all "bad asses" and I started wit you. If it hadn't bin for dat lousy Fistless Flash, I woulda whipped your ass all ova da ring. Sandman, you aint so tough neitha. Without all your knights behind you its gonna be a real dark night for you. IIWF, Da Family is back and in full effect! [Fade] 12. The ARMED FORCES handed HEAVY METAL their first IIWF defeat in a non-title match by smacking them round the head with their tag belts for the pinfall. You can bet that Robo Stone's men will be looking for a rematch. However, after the bell, out came the High Plains Drifters, flaunting their unsanctioned belts. Of course, they'll get the chance to take the real titles from the Forces at Ring Wars II, as they'll be challenging alongside Stunt Team USA. 13. In the main event, DAN KAUFFMAN went down to defeat at the hands of the OUTLAW J.W. HARDIN, thanks to the vicious Cattle Buster DDT. Kauffman, as always, put up a fantastic fight, and had Hardin reeling for much of the match, but when Hardin's allies -- the Senator, Brian Lau and Josey Wales -- wheeled a sealed coffin down to ringside, shortly followed by a curious Deathbringer, Kauffman's attention was diverted, allowing Hardin to regain the advantage. And Hardin may just have gained the advantage over Deathbringer in his quest to beat him at Ring Wars II, thanks to the "secret weapon" which emerged from the casket on Wednesday night: the deadly and sinister Cadaver. I'll be filling you in on just who this individual is later on, but for now, let's hear from Deathbringer, who knows all too well what Cadaver's arrival in the IIWF means: [SCENE: In the graveyard, Deathbringer stands in the entrance to the mortuary, the IIWF belt on his shoulder.] DB: "Cadaver... At last... I could foresee that you would cross my path once again... Ever since you vanished I knew that I had not seen the last of you. Now you team up with the Outlaw. And you make him think that you are on his side. I know it better and so do you. You just use that poor mortal to get your hands at me. And though I disrespect such behaviour, I have to admit that it sticks to the rules. So at some point we will once again see this epic good versus evil battle that has been going on between our two entities for eternity..." [Deathbringer starts to slowly walk across the graveyard] DB: "I can see that you told the Outlaw a thing or two already. But you know as well as I do that he will have no place in our battle. And after all, what secrets could he know that I do not? You claim to know everything about the dark side, but just as I told you quite a while ago: I created it. But you plan to conquer it again. The Outlaw will be of no use in fulfilling this task. He was your instrument, now at what point will you drop him?" [Deathbringer stops in front of an open grave] DB: "As far as I know you, you will try to solve your task step by step, and the first step is this belt, right? [He takes the IIWF championship belt from his shoulder] DB: "Obey my call to the cemetary and get it!" [Deathbringer throws the belt into the grave. Fade] IIWF Saturday Night - 28 September 1996 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Coming at you live from the America West Arena, here in Phoenix, Arizona, tomorrow night's card promises to be unmissable. As well as an update from the IIWF President on Ring Wars II, there's all this great action coming at you: "Badboy" Randy Acorn vs. El Super Gecko [J] [D] The "Badboy" is fresh from a victory over Prisoner #109 in midweek, and he'll be wanting to follow it up with another win over ill-fated newcomer El Super Gecko, who has so far been dubbed "a defeat of style over substance", "hopeless", and "awful." Time will tell whether he is able to make a mark here in the IIWF, or whether he will go in the way of "Nifty" Ned Norton. Magus vs. The Punster [D] With the Punster "looking after" Robski's girlfriend, Jasmine, Magus has decided that he'd like to go looking for a little vengeance on behalf of his friend, the self-monikered English sensation, although whether a nutcase like Magus understands the concept of friendship is probably a more pressing question than predicting the outcome of this match. Robski vs. Majestic Maurice McArthur [J] [D] Robski has certainly been stirring up trouble here in the IIWF, alleging that the Man Of Steel is not all that he seems, and with Casey James preparing to add more sleaze to this already disgusting plot of character assassination, things can only get worse. Things look grim, too, for Triple M, but at least he'll have the support of the crowd in taking Robski down a peg or two. The White Phoenix vs. Pale Rider [D] Shinja Chow is a strange and disturbed individual, that much is for sure. He is also a fantastic athlete with some tremendous ring skills and aerial ability. Hopefully we'll see some of those skills in action as he takes on Pale Rider tomorrow night, who is no stranger to the air himself, having notched up a fair few frequent flier miles with his airborne antics in his tag encounters with partner Easy Rider. This High Plains Drifter even entered the recent Cruiserweight Tourney, so he's no stranger to singles competition, and he'll be no pushover for Chow. Pain Inc. vs. The Rotundos [J] [D] Pain Inc. are on a roll, having taken out the Arabian Knights in midweek -- for now, at least -- and are tomorrow night turning their attentions to the exemplars of obesity, the not entirely unaccurately named Rotundos. One of the biggest mysteries in the IIWF is just what the first names of the two Rotundo brothers might be. Otto "the Butcher" Verhoeven vs. "Nuclear" John Bomber [D] Otto Verhoeven has arguably made the biggest impact in the smallest time of any athlete to arrive in the IIWF -- and he hopes to add another victory to his already growing list of conquests tomorrow night with a win over the struggling "Nuclear" John Bomber. At over 300lbs, nearly seven feet tall, and possessing some of the most fearsomely deadly manoeuvres in the sport, who'd bet against him? [SCENE: Larry Morton is walking around on Josey Wales' ranch. As he strolls around a corner he sees Otto Verhoeven, chopping some wood.] LM: Hello, Herr Verhoeven. What are you doing here? OV: Is this really so difficult? [chop] LM: No, I mean, what are you doing on the ranch? After all, you are not a part of the Syndicate, the Senate or the Posse... [with a cautious look] are you? OV: Nein, nein, but Herr Wales invited me to visit him and meet my Wargames partners, work out some tactics and just relax a bit. [chop] You know, Larry, these men here are the meanest and toughest bunch of wrestlers in the world right now, and I would be stupid to decline an offer to associate with these men. Even though I do not understand all of the good versus evil mumbo jumbo, I realize that something is happening here in the IIWF, and I made sure I am on the winning side of the coming war with a group of people I can respect. The few who dare stand in our way, the self-proclaimed "sheriffs", will go down, crying in agony on the floor. You can bet on that, Larry. [chop] LM: I guess we will see it, October 12th, Ring... OV: Shut up. Do you know who my next opponent will be? LM: Yes, I called Tim and he told me that you will face "Nuclear" John Bomber. OV: Ah, ja, the mutant, or something like that. [chop] Finally another big man, I am tired of squashing those little wimps. Bomber, eh? The one who runs around screaming how he will destroy all rule rulebreakers? [He smiles] I think that the maniac deserves a good, old fashioned beating to show him that the rulebreakers rule the IIWF. And if that...that Canadian piece of trash Quigley shows his ugly face again he will receive a little taste of the Butcher-style. Now leave me alone, Morton, I have work to do! [Fade] Man Of Steel vs. Sabin Figaro We've still been unable to reach the Man Of Steel following his shocking car accident on Tuesday night, news of which reached us during Tuesday's broadcast. However, as I found out on Wednesday, he has suffered a hairline fracture of the cheekbone, a nose fracture, and a compression fracture to his right eyesocket. He has undergone surgery to repair the damage, and of the injuries, it is the damage to the eye that is of the most concern to the doctors. If reinjured, the eyesocket could fracture, with the possible upshots of either blinding the victim, or killing him by the piercing of the brain by a shard of bone. Obviously, they are very concerned about the possibility of Steel reinjuring himself, despite the heavy-duty custom-made facial application that he will be wearing in the ring, and as such have decided to keep him under observation in hospital until tomorrow morning, when he will undergo a test to determine whether he is fit to wrestle, before either being discharged and making the trip to Phoenix, or being told to remain in hospital. So this match might not even go ahead, folks, but we're hoping that Steel will be there tomorrow night, if only to answer the growing murmurs of discontent in the fans of the IIWF, who are becoming increasingly disillusioned with the previously squeaky-clean Steel, amid rumours that he might be about to do a "Casey James". More on this tomorrow night, folks, when the next episode of this drama will unfold. Tiger Claw vs. Louie the Ninja [J] The IIWF Intercontinental Champion, Tiger Claw, has no shortage of challengers wanting to take his title from him, but he has decided that he would rather have a quick warmup than a really competitive match tomorrow night, opting for a non-title encounter with the gangly and clumsy Louie the Ninja. Don't expect anything out of the ordinary in this one, folks, although Don Antonio could well be in the area and looking for the man with the baseball bat... Casey "Blackheart" James vs. Archangel Casey James accepted the challenge of the new and improved Archangel without a moment's hesitation, and it could be a decision he will live to regret, as he goes up against the huge 400lbs, 7'3" monster in the ring one-on-one. From what I hear, Archangel wants to go through Casey to get to Joe Latta, although I expect if Archangel wanted Latta in the ring, all he'd have to do is ask. ========================================= IIWF WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: Armed Forces vs. The Zodiac Connection ========================================= The Zodiac Connection may not have been around the rings of the IIWF very long, but already they've built up a solid fan following, and they're going to need that support when they step into the squared circle to face the Armed Forces tomorrow night for the World Tag straps. NavCom and DefCon, possibly the most long-winded superstars in the IIWF right now, and definitely challengers for the Golden Grapple Longest Interview award which was so proudly accepted by Dan Kauffman at this year's ceremony, now proudly present the second part of the "inspirational" interview on their local Omaha TV station that we had the misfortune of viewing on Tuesday: [Cut back to the WOWT Studios, where two anchors sit, preparing to go back to Jane Phillips for the rest of the Armed Forces' interview. ) Anchor: And now, in a moment, we go to that touching interview with Omaha's finest, the Armed Forces. Anchor 2: Yes, the Armed Forces have been great to the city of Omaha, as well as people abroad, and their impacts have been worldwide. Tonight, we'll take a look at that second part of that huge, monumental interview, and we've got Jane Phillips once again... Jane! [Phillips is standing outside the IIWF Coliseum.] Jane: Yes indeed, it was right here where the Armed Forces won the IIWF Tag Team Championship, on IIWF Saturday Night back in August. And now I'm joined by the IIWF World Tag Team Champions, NavCom and DefCon... hello gentlemen. [NavCom and DefCon appear on the scene inside the Coliseum as it cuts to Phillips in the stands in the Coliseum. NavCom and DefCon are wearing T-shirts and blue jeans and have the Title Belts draped across their shoulders.] NavCom: Hello again Jane. It's nice to see your friendly face. DefCon: Jane, have you lost weight? Jane: [blushing] Oh, you're such charmers. Well, we're at your old stomping ground here in the IIWF Coliseum. First, let's talk about your IIWF debuts. NavCom: He he. That was a fun one. Beating up on the UN. Jane: Yes, your first match was against Tora Tora Tora and Jacques K. Vorkian, a team known as the United Nations...guys, tell us a little bit about that match, and about the symbolic attack at the end of the match. DefCon: Well, the match spoke for itself. We got in there and took the wood to a lame team. No big deal, 1..2..3 in the center of the ring. It's what we do. But, the attack afterwards...that was important. NavCom: We needed a quick boost to the top. By taking care of the United Nations, we were able to get some attention from the rest of the tag team ranks, maybe anger the friends of the UN. DefCon: Yeah, and we sure got the quick boost. Heh. A few weeks after that, we ended up with the titles. Jane: Good description. There it is, the Armed Forces sending the message. Well, tell us about the rest of the career...up until the Title Match. NavCom: We lost to Law and Disorder by DQ. No big deal. Marshall and Ace are jobbers anyway, and so we decided to take the irons to them. That feels much better than really winning a match. But, we soon realized that we wanted the titles, and we needed some "computer" wins to get that. DefCon: So we took on two teams in four days. We had worked for a match with Stunt Team USA forever, and we finally got it signed. But, then President Dan did something odd. He just scheduled us a match with the Guiding Lights. So, we had to forget about scouting the Bungle Boys and start worrying about the Lights. Jane: But, that didn't turn out too badly, did it? NavCom: Of course not. Aaron kept us focused on both jobs at hand, and we took it one at a time. We defeating the Guiding Lights, and moved on to our BIG match against the Stunt Team. DefCon: People claimed a tainted win there. Hardly. Another 1-2-3, fair and square. From there, we started making some noise. People started jobbing for us left and right... and we ended up in a pay-per-view, teamed with the Alphabet Boys. Jane: I don't think any of us will forget Midsummer Madness... tell us about how the idiots let you down. NavCom: Took the words right out of my mouth. They were so stupid, we had to worry about getting the jump put on us from behind. And as a result, we got DQd once, and another time somebody hooked Def's tights for a fast count pinfall. DefCon: We weren't too happy about that. So, we challenged the ABC Twins to a match...but they lacked the balls. They ran away, and it was just ANOTHER team we chased off. Jane: Okay, now take me to the title match. IIWF Saturday Night. August 21st. The whole city of Omaha behind you...tell me about the pre-match hype. DefCon: We had the Omaha World-Herald calling the offices constantly. They wanted an interview so often...but Aaron was great. He kept the attention focused on the Drifters, and not the titles. We prepared for any regular match... NavCom: Aaron has been an outstanding manager. He keeps us focused, and takes the distractions out of the picture. He's a genius. We owe so much of this to him. Jane: Okay, so take us to the match now. NavCom: We were really pumped up. We walked through those curtains... and we had ALL of our fans just screaming for us. It was a great feeling to have such support. DefCon: We got the early advantage, but we fell behind. Jane: Yes, it looked like big trouble after DefCon got cheap shotted off the apron. But, as we see here... [Footage of NavCom's Victory Roll pans the screen. NavCom uses his arms to get the momentum, and upon getting Rider rolled over, he hooks the legs with his arms. Rider kicks and kicks as the referee slowly counts...1...2...3!!] Jane: A move forever remembered as "The Roll", NavCom bringing the IIWF World Tag Team Titles home for the Armed Forces. NavCom? [NavCom wipes a tear from his eye and clutches his belt.] NavCom: It was an outstanding feeling. He had me up there in that clothesline thing...and I had the presence of mind to use my agility for a pinning predicament. I had good leverage and I got him. DefCon: I didn't see it. I was on the ground, trying to tend to my eye that just got poked by Wales. I just heard this massive crowd pop, and I knew that the fan favorites, the Forces, must have won. I looked up with my good eye and saw NavCom standing in the ring with his arms raised. It was great. Jane: The city of Omaha just exploded when that happened. There were 20,000 people watching on the big screens at Aksarben. People were dancing and hugging and having a ball. It was swell. NavCom: That doesn't surprise me. DefCon: Nav and I are real good citizens, and we only wanted to improve the lives of others. If winning the titles did that, then we've accomplished our mission. Jane: Well, you have been great fighting champions as of late... NavCom: We're giving everybody a shot. HPD got another one, and they lost. Stunt Team got a shot, and they didn't get these belts either. Law and Disorder got a shot and they couldn't beat us. And the other day, we took on Heavy Metal, non-title, and we whipped them in like two minutes. We're unbeatable. DefCon: And now they've scheduled us to face the Zodiac Connection. Boy. Talk about wasting our time. I can't stand facing all of this pud competition. Jane: And so they've put you in the match at Ring Wars II. NavCom: Aaron's a brilliant manager. When he heard that Spreadbury wanted us to face two at once, he was against it. We all know that any match where a DQ or Countout can cost you the title makes us just as much the challengers as the other two. It's like we've been stripped of the titles and they're making us win them back. It's pathetic. DefCon: But we got in the match anyway. We knew it was a bad match, but we didn't wanna dodge. We'd much rather wrestle each of them at the card, one match at a time, but this will be okay. We'll take care of Stunt Team and the Drifters....AGAIN. Jane: So, you're not mad at the decision. NavCom: Well, we are getting the shaft. There's no doubt. But, we've hated the Drifters and the Bunglers for a long time. And, we've beaten HPD twice and Stunt Team is winless in two tries against us. So, we've got tons of confidence going into this match. Title defenses don't scare us. We're sure shots to win anyway. DefCon: Send us your best. IIWF, we can take anything you send at us. Jane: Any closing thoughts? DefCon: Yeah, this is to those hicks...the High Plains Drifters. You've been flashing around those Golden Grapple Awards, claiming they're your "belts". Screw that. HPD, you put your "belts" on the line at Ring Wars. The winner of the match walks out with BOTH the IIWF Titles AND the melted Grapple Awards. Come on, let's put your belts where your mouths are. Jane: You're both great men. [Nav and Def shake hands with Jane Phillips.] Jane: Ladies and gentlemen, the Armed Forces. True heroes from the battlefield to the ring. Great men. For WOWT Omaha, I'm Jane Phillips saying goodnight. [Highlights of the Armed Forces show. "The Roll", the attack on the United Nations, pinning Stunt Team, and the recent win over Heavy Metal. Fade.] Thank heavens that's over. Yes, folks, you are still watching the IIWF Control Centre Update. We apologise for that extended transmission of biased guff and continue with the show. Thankfully a lot less long-winded, and straight to the point, let's hear from the challengers, the Zodiac Connection: [SCENE: Scorpio, Taurus and Dr. Insane stand in the IIWF interview area.] Scorpio: Hey Taurus we have an upcoming match against The WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS....THE ARMED FORCES!! Gee...whose Armed Forces would have let them in....maybe they were among the Iraqis that ran like cowards during the War in the Gulf! Taurus: It doesn't matter....the stars tell us that the Armed Forces are just a stepping stone towards our rise to the top! Armed Forces do not take us lightly because of where we have been. To us there is no way to go but up and as long as the people continue to believe in us that anything is possible...then that's all that matters! Scorpio: Pain, Inc. do not think for one solitary second that we are finished with you chumps! As soon as we take care of things in the next few days then my friends the Zodiac Connection will be coming to hurt you!! We are going to play things by the book because that is the only way we will feel good about any of our wins - but that doesn't mean that we have to be Pacifists. Taurus: White Pheonix....listen up! An old adversary of yours has asked us to offer our support to you! You wouldn't believe it if we told you who it was so we have decided that he should remain anonymous! He respects your battle skills very much and would like to see you rise to the top just as the Phenoix should! That man is our cousin so we will honor the wishes of our family! Anybody that interferes in any of your matches will have to contend with us as well! Dr. Insane: White Phenoix....I'll even give you a clue.....what do the letters DM mean to you???? Folks...what it all boils down to is quite simple....IT'S ALL IN THE STARS! [Fade] ============================================= IIWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: Deathbringer vs. "Painbringer" Billy Sexton ============================================= A lot of things have got to be going through Deathbringer's mind as he goes out to defend his World title against a man with a not unimpressive win/loss record here in the IIWF. He'll be looking over his shoulder for Hardin, Cadaver, and goodness knows what other minions of the "forces of darkness", as well has having to try and keep that gold strap from Sexton, who is also promising a little surprise: [Camera fades into Billy Sexton standing in the IIWF interview area. He turns to the camera and speaks:] BS: DEATHBRINGER... OH, DEATHBRINGER. The time has come, my first title shot. And I get the honor of taking the belt away from you. Well baby, this Saturday I'm not only going to take the belt away from you. I have another surprise waiting for you. I guess you're wondering what it is....Death baby, you'll have to wait. This surprise will turn the wrestling world upside down. Something so outrageous that you wouldn't believe it unless you've seen it. Deathbringer you are going to see it first hand. And when you do I want you to tell the world. How FOR THE FIRST TIME, A MAN, A MAN BY THE NAME OF BILLY SEXTON, PUT FEAR INTO YOUR HEART AND IN YOUR EYES. DEATHBRINGER, this Saturday your worst nightmare -- the Painbringer Billy Sexton -- is in town....PREPARE TO BE SURPRISED! OH YEAH!" [Fade] ============================================================= IIWF CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare vs. "Showstopper" Simon Lebec ============================================================= The Cruiserweight Championship has quickly become a hot commodity here in the IIWF, and tomorrow night, the man behind the bizarre "Showstopper sperm" tries to wrest that coveted title away from "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare. Let's hear from the two protagonists in this little one-act drama: [SCENE: All is black. A single spotlight splits the darkness, revealing the Cruiserweight Title Belt abandoned on an empty stage. A familiar pair of boots appear and stand over the belt. A voice speaks from the dark.] Billy Shakespeare: "O! My fortunes have corrupted honest men." While Antony's words may not be _exactly_ apt, the sentiment hold true. Since winning this belt, I've seen all sorts of plots against me. The belt lies here for the taking. But desire alone will not bring the prize. Lebec, you remain a petty annoyance, a mere buffoon who continues to dog my heels in a pitiful attempt to learn the secret of being 'Born to Perform'. Why Miss Crystal follows you as Svengali continues to baffle me. However, there is one who causes me no such confusion: Randy Acorn. I know what you're after. Do you want a piece of my act? Then join the games at Ring Wars. The others be damned, if you pin me in that ring, I'll give you the Cruiser Belt. You and me, in the eye of the storm. What's your answer? Or are you afraid? As Antony later, more correctly surmises, "In time we hate that which we often fear." And "Badboy", your hatred of me is pretty obvious. [Billy picks the belt up off the floor. The spotlight lingers momentarily, then fades. Cut to Simon Lebec in his penthouse apartment.] SL: Shakespeare... I got you this Saturday for that title. Ask Warnett how it feels to be "Showstopped"!!! HA!! [He holds up a globe] With all my merchaindising as of late, I think I need a little vacation until Saturday. By the way, you can order a Lebec catalogue of many great mail order items for only $9.95. Now, where should I go?? [He closes his eyes, spins the wheel and points. The globe lands on Newfoundland, Canada] New foundwhat???? Never heard of it. Hey!! Perhaps there are honeys there. FRANCOIS!!!! [Francois comes] Get the private jet gassed up. We're headin' north!!!! Shakespeare!! See ya in the ring on Saturday. Perhaps I'll bring you back a postcard. Warnett!! I bring you back a hat to cover that cue ball head of yours. HA!!! [Fade] Look for this one to be a high-flying, high-impact match, folks, with all kinds of thrills and spills. Both of these guys give their all when they step between the ropes, and I'm sure tomorrow night will be no exception. All in all, things are shaping up to be another unmissable IIWF event, so catch all the action _live_ tomorrow night. Hang on... let's quickly go to our outside broadcast unit and Larry Morton, who is apparently with a gathering of IIWF fans, hoping to catch a glimpse of Archangel. Over to you, Larry. [SCENE: Larry Morton standing outside the America West Arena.] LM: I have just recieved word that Archangel is in the area. The fans are going crazy. I wonder what the purpose of his business is. Fan1: He's hunting down evildoers, man! Hey, look in the sky! [A red cross burns in the sky.] LM: Amazing. I have never seen anything like this. [Scene cuts to a church where the Ark stands on the pulpit. A voice is heard.] A: Joe Latta, Outlaw, you both have demons that need to be exorcised. At Ring Wars 2 both of you will have to watch your backs. Especially you, Joe Latta. You will undergo the Last Temptation, you will feel the Judgement Day Drop. [The lights go out and a red cross appears. This message has been paid for by the Church of the IIWF.] IIWF Midweek Mayhem - 2 October 1996 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The IIWF's tour rumbles right into the Las Vegas Silver Bowl next Wednesday with another rip-roaring roller-coaster ride of a Midweek Mayhem. The following matches are already signed: - Don Antonio & Vinny Cappicola vs. Armed Forces - Dan Kauffman vs. Magus - "Enigma" Takezo Musashi vs. Prince of Darkness More matches will be announced in time for Tuesday's complete top to bottom rundown. IIWF Ring Wars II - 12 October 1996 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There's still more exciting information on this huge event to come tomorrow night from the IIWF President, but for now, let's take a look at the card as it stands: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= IIWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP CASKET MATCH: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Deathbringer vs. Outlaw J.W. Hardin ------------------------------------------------- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= WAR GAMES MATCH: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Dan Kauffman [c] vs. Casey "Blackheart" James [C] Man Of Steel Joe Latta "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley Otto "the Butcher" Verhoeven "Spotlight" Billy Shakespeare "Painbringer" Billy Sexton Vinny Cappicola The Sandman The White Phoenix "Badboy" Randy Acorn ? ? --------------------------------------------------------------------- -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= IIWF INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP CAGE BASEBALL BAT MATCH: -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Tiger Claw vs. Don Antonio ---------------------------------- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= THREE-WAY IIWF WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP ELIMINATION MATCH: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Armed Forces vs. High Plains Drifters vs. Stunt Team USA ------------------------------------------------------------- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- LOG SCAFFOLD MATCH: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- "Angel of the Sun" Hakiro Matsuoko vs. "Enigma" Takezo Musashi -------------------------------------------------------------- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= HAIR vs. HAIR MATCH: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= "Showstopper" Simon Lebec vs. Marty Warnett ------------------------------------------- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= LUMBERJACK RULES NOOSE MATCH: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= The Hangman vs. Fisto Flash (w/Atomic Destroyers) (w/Heavy Metal) ------------------------------------------- Latest Rankings ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Name F/H Fought W L D Win% Ranking (old) new ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Deathbringer F 17 13 2 2 82% (WC) WC Tiger Claw H 22 13 8 1 61% (IC) IC Billy Shakespeare F 16 13 3 0 81% (CW) CW ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Outlaw J.W. Hardin H 15 11 2 2 80% (1) 1 Dan Kauffman F 18 12 4 2 72% (2) 2 Otto Verhoeven H 7 5 2 0 71% (3) 3 Billy Sexton H 15 10 5 0 67% (8) 4 Chris Quigley F 6 4 2 0 67% (5) 5 The White Phoenix F 3 2 1 0 67% (6) 6 Vinny Cappicola F 10 5 2 3 65% (7) 7 Hakiro Matsuoko H 15 9 5 1 63% (9) 8 "Enigma" Takezo Musashi N 8 5 3 0 63% (10) 9 Don Antonio F 13 8 5 0 62% (11) 10 "Badboy" Randy Acorn H 7 3 2 2 57% (20) 11 Brad "Bodybag" Kinder H 17 9 7 1 56% (13) 12 Simon Lebec H 16 9 7 0 56% (14) 13 Robski H 13 7 6 0 54% (15) 14 Casey James H 15 7 6 2 53% (16) 15= Fisto Flash H 15 7 6 2 53% (19) 15= Man Of Steel F 21 10 9 2 52% (17) 17 Prince of Darkness H 15 6 6 3 50% (18) 18 Joe Latta H 15 7 7 1 50% (21) 19 Mr. Damage H 10 5 5 0 50% (23) 20 The Sandman H 8 4 4 0 50% (12) 21 Archangel F 4 2 2 0 50% (27) 22 The Punster F 10 4 5 1 45% (22) 23 The Hangman H 10 3 4 3 45% (24) 24 Marty Warnett F 8 3 5 0 38% (25) 25 Prisoner #109 H 7 2 4 1 36% (26) 26 Magus H 10 3 7 0 30% (28) 27 "Nuclear" John Bomber F 9 2 7 0 22% (29) 28 Sabin Figaro F 4 1 3 0 25% (30) 29 ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Name of team F/H Fought W L D Win% Ranking (old) new ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Armed Forces H 10 7 2 1 75% (WT) WT ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Heavy Metal H 6 5 1 0 83% (11) 1 High Plains Drifters H 16 12 4 0 75% (2) 2 Stunt Team USA F 15 10 5 0 67% (3) 3 Pain Inc. H 3 2 1 0 67% (6) 4 The Arabian Knights H 5 3 2 0 60% (1) 5 Atomic Destroyers H 10 5 4 1 55% (4) 6 The Zodiac Connection F 4 2 2 0 50% (8=) 7 Aces of the Deep F 5 2 3 0 40% (5) 8 Steamroller F 9 3 6 0 33% (7) 9 ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Rising Sun Revolution F 4 4 0 0 100% (12) 10 ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Dross Report ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Some people have had the misfortune of coming across this man before; others became acquainted with him for the first time on Wednesday night when the Outlaw J.W. Hardin revealed just who it is that has been revealing to him the secrets of the IIWF World Heavyweight Champion, Deathbringer. The man of whom I -- and now the whole world -- speak goes by the name of Cadaver, a former world champion in another wrestling organisation, and very familiar to the Outlaw, Deathbringer, and various other current IIWF superstars who have met him on their travels. However, for those wrestlers and fans who have not heard of Cadaver before -- and needless to say, everybody will be hearing a great deal more of him in the future here in the IIWF -- here's the lowdown. He stands at 6'7" tall, weighs in at nearly 300lbs, dresses in black, with a black mask, and long black hair. For a man of his size, he possesses tremendous agility, and he would often astound his opponents with high-flying moonsaults, as well as his traditional, stalking and punishing, methodical ring style. He had battles with the Outlaw in the past on the course to win his first world title, and came out on top, creating what many who know Hardin believed to be an everlasting grudge against the dark and mysterious Cadaver. However, that is clearly not true, as the two of them have joined forces, both to dethrone Deathbringer from the IIWF Championship, and to extinguish the light in the IIWF forever. Both Hardin and Cadaver disappeared without trace into seclusion after the events of Wednesday night, and I had to go searching through the video archives to even find any footage of Cadaver. I eventually stumbled across an interview from a long, long time ago, which I present to you now, with the closing thought: has the IIWF ever seen a more dangerous alliance than the one forged at the Wales Ranch summit, especially now with both Hardin and Cadaver at the helm? [SCENE: A dark, lonely and windy moor. Standing under the twisted and dead remains of a lifeless tree, an imposing figure stands in silhouette. His deep, rasping voice is only just audible above the whistle of the wind across the exposed heathland, but it is sinister both in its tone and its almost whispered, yet unfettered, menace:] "Throughout the ages, man has been afraid of many things. I, Cadaver, have walked abroad for all eternity, and I have seen man's fear in the eyes of the living and the eyes of the dying. When a man steps into the ring with me, his eyes belie the bravado that his body might suggest. For when you stare into the eyes of Cadaver, you stare into the eyes of death himself. I have come to the IHIW to relieve all men of that fear. It is simply a matter of time. Cadaver is patient. Ashes to ashes, and dust to dust..." [The figure lets out a hollow laugh as the scene fades.] Next Report ~~~~~~~~~~~ Well, that just about wraps it up for tonight, folks. We'll be back tomorrow night with more incredible live IIWF action from the America West Arena, here in Phoenix, and it's a show you won't want to miss. I'll be back with another Control Centre Update on Tuesday, so until then, this is Tim Dross, saying: so long, everybody! +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | Send mail to iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk with the subject lines: | | "send faq" for the FAQ + "send singles" or "send tag" for the | | rosters + "send handlers" for a list of handlers | +------------------------------------+---------------------------------+ | URL: http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk/ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+