[Fade up on characteristic scenes of London; red buses, underground train stations, the Tower of London, scenes of the river Thames, Buckingham Palace.] VO: London, England. The heart of a nation known around the world as being civilised, genteel, and steeped in tradition. The historic landmarks of its capital city are associated by people all over the world with the image of England, an image which has been shattered by two of the IIWF's superstars. [Lord Byron's image fades onto the screen, as he screws up his handsome features in a snarl, applying the Aristoclutch on a hapless preliminary opponent.] Firstly, Lord Byron, the arrogant blue-blood. While he is civil and polite outside the ring, when this man steps between the ropes, he is all business, and he's not afraid to break the rules in a most impolite manner. [Marty Warnett appears on the screen, being mobbed by the fans.] The young athlete, Marty Warnett, espouses the work hard, play hard ethic of aspiring hopefuls everywhere. In a few short months, Warnett has taken beaten after beating, but he has scored famous victories, and he's looking for another over long-time nemesis Byron tonight -- in a quintessentially English "Pure Science" match. No closed fists, no shots below the belt -- and the loser must acknowledge to the hometown crowd that the winner is the better athlete. The stakes are high in London town tonight as we bring you _LIVE_... [The opening graphics explode onto the screen:] ##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== S + A + T + U + R + D + A + Y N + I + G + H + T ----------------------------------------------- + LiVE + Royal Albert Hall, London, England + = Saturday 7 December 1996 = [The opening graphics fade through to interior shots of the majestic Royal Albert Hall. The ringside enclosure is cordoned off in the centre of the floor of the Hall, while the crowd is seated around it and up the sides of the building in the three tiers of seating. The camera pans up to the very top of the arena, where fans crowd around the railings waving, and waving banners which they hang down from the balcony. A large frame is suspended above the ring, and as the crowd cheers, the letters "IIWF" explode in sparks as fireworks on the flame are ignited. Pan down past the ring to the broadcast table, at which stand Tim Dross and "Soundbite" Steve Roberts.] TD: Welcome everybody to London, England! Welcome to the Royal Albert Hall! Welcome, everybody, to another live and loud edition of IIWF Saturday Night! I'm Tim Dross, and beside me as always is my broadcast colleague, "Soundbite" Steve Roberts. What a night of action we have in store tonight, Steve. SR: You're right, Dross. We may be on the wrong side of the pond, but the IIWF has hit little ol' England in a big way, and tonight, Lord Byron is going to show his ignorant countrymen exactly how to wrestle a scientific match. Warty Walnut is going to be humiliated on home turf right here tonight, Dross. TD: We'll see about that, Steve. But you heard about that match at the top of the hour -- Marty Warnett will battle Lord Byron in a Pure Science Match, and we're still waiting to find out exactly what Warnett's special announcement is concerning that match. SR: He's probably going to announce that he's too chicken to get into the ring with Byron, Dross. TD: I doubt that very much, Steve. Another huge match tonight pits the undefeated IIWF World Tag Team Champions, Rising Sun Revolution, against the High Plains Drifters, who earned the shot by defeating the Armed Forces in Mexico last Saturday. What a match that's going to be. SR: Finally, the Demon and the Donkey will be dethroned by a team of true greatness -- the whiskey-swilling High Plains Drifters are going to show us what they're made of. TD: I hope they've stayed away from the Keller's in the past week, Steve, because the Drifters are going to need every last ounce of skill at their disposal to oust Ryudu and Hiroshi tonight. Our third headline match pits the Dark Disciples against "Enigma" Takezo Musashi and the White Phoenix, as the two Oriental athletes battle not only for their lives against the Disciples, but for the Enigma's career. If Musashi and Chow lose tonight, the Enigma is out of the IIWF for good. SR: Time to bid a fond farewell to the Enema, Dross. TD: In other action, the "Painbringer" Billy Sexton, who is still on his ridiculous crusade against the IIWF establishment, will face the impressive Steve "the Fury" Kowalski. Those two are extremely angry individuals, Steve. It'll be quite a match. SR: I don't know who to root for in that one, Dross, although I must say that Kowalski has more "get up and go" than Sexton -- he won't complain about conspiracies, he'll just kick ass. TD: How delicately put, as always. Deathbringer will also be in action as he goes up against the arrogant "Superstar" Stud Stetson, and two newcomers will make their IIWF debuts, as Creed takes on Cheshire. What a couple of bizarre individuals these two are, Steve. SR: No stranger than seeing you and Larry Morton sniggering in the corner at an IIWF staff party. TD: *ahem* Former Intercontinental Champion Tiger Claw will go up against the high-flying Onslaught in light heavyweight action later on tonight, and in tag team action, the Arabian Knights will face the Players' Club. Plus the lovely Becky LaRue will be here later on with her guests for this week's "LaRue's Lair", G.W.R. We'll also have some very big news on IIWF Snow Brawl, which is now only two weeks away, straight from the horse's mouth, so to speak. SR: Hehe... you said it, Dross. TD: I mean, the mouth of the IIWF President. Don't snigger, Steve. Let's get up to the ring for tonight's opening match, as the Venusian Death Cell takes on the Sandman. SR: VDC is going to kill him. He's chaotic, uncontrollable, and vicious. TD: Usually... SR: Speaking of which... What are you putting in his drinks? TD: What are you talking about? SR: Oh, come on... =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Venusian Death Cell vs. The Sandman =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= [Sparkplug Lee steps into the glare of the spotlight in the ring. He bows.] RA: Your Royal Highness, my lords, ladies and gentlemen, this next contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, weighing in at 332 lbs, The Venusian Death Cell! [The piercing notes of the "Psycho" theme blare out of the PA speakers, and the VDC walks out into the aisle. He's got a grim look on his face, and spits the familiar green fluid onto the floor.] TD: I don't envy the Sandman in this contest. SR: Of course, you'd probably just poison the VDC, right? TD: What are you talking about? [The video wall flickers into life.] TD: Hang on -- look at the video wall. It's Bishop Right! SR: Not that holier-than-thou moron! What's he doing back here?! [As Bishop Right speaks, two figures dressed like monks carry a body out into the aisle, and place it underneath the video wall. The crowd are confused, and fall silent as Bishop Right speaks:] BR: This is your Legion who claims to be the Archangel! Sandman, how could you have been duped by such a thing? Soon all will be revealed. [Bishop Right disappears from the video wall as the Sandman comes out into the aisle. He looks with some interest at the carcass in the aisle, but shakes his head and beckons to the monks that he wants no part in any of this before making his way to the ring. The monks pick up the carcass and remove it from the aisle.] SR: What the hell was that all about, Dross?! TD: I don't know. Was that really Legion? Was he dead? SR: This place is too weird for me. Come back Utah, all is forgiven. TD: We've never been to Utah, Steve. SR: Exactly. RA: His opponent, about to enter the ring, weighing in at 275 lbs, The Sandman! [The Sandman enters the ring and walks straight towards VDC, ready to hit him with a double axehandle. VDC is ready, though, and gives Sandman a forearm to the gut. The bell rings as the Sandman doubles over, and VDC hits a hard powerbomb. VDC goes for the pin... 1 - Kickout by Sandman. VDC picks up Sandman and throws him into the ropes, hitting a clothesline on the rebound. Sandman hits the mat, and the VDC drops an elbow. Vdc gets up, bringing Sandman with him, and sets him up for a backbreaker. The crowd gives a heel pop as VDC drops Sandman across his knee.] TD: The Sandman is just getting obliterated out there! SR: Maybe we'll hear the end of his whining... [The VDC looks to the crowd and wipes his mouth of some green fluid, then turns back to the Sandman. VDC sets Sandman up for a piledriver, but the Sandman blocks. Again, VDC tries to lift Sandman up, but again, it is blocked. Sandman throws VDC with a backdrop, then falls to his knees. The VDC quickly gets up and closes in on Sandman, who quickly dodges and locks on a sleeper hold. The crowd pops as VDC staggers around with Sandman hanging off him. Sandman's feet are completely off the ground due to the difference in size between the two wrestlers. VDC uses this opportunity to ram Sandman into the corner. Sandman leans on the turnbuckles, and VDC charges in for an avalanche. Sandman gets out of the way, and VDC hits the buckles hard. VDC falls to the mat, and the crowd pops.] TD: I think VDC might have hit his head there... SR: Sandman just got lucky... Of course, he'll probably screw it up... [Sandman gathers up his strength and begins an assault on the VDC. Sandman lays the boots to VDC, and drops a few elbows. Sandman drags VDC up and throws him into the ropes, hitting with a clothesline on the rebound. The VDC falls to the mat, and Sandman showboats to the crowd, getting a good pop. Sandman picks VDC up for the Nightmare, but VDC kicks him in the gut, then grabs him by the throat, executing a chokeslam. VDC covers... 1 - 2 - 3! Ding! Ding! Heel pop!] SR: I told you... TD: Stop it, Steve... [VDC goes to the second rope and raises his arms, spitting green mist into the air. Sandman gets off the mat and hits the ropes in frustration. Sandman looks over to where VDC is standing, and goes into his trunks. Sandman goes over to VDC and taps him on the shoulder. VDC turns, and Sandman throaws dust into VDC's eyes. VDC falls back, and Sandman exits the ring, going to the official's table. Sandman grabs a microphone.] TS: Sometimes I play possum. It's time for action now, no longer will I rave about what I'm going to do, I'M JUST GOING TO DO IT! Beware of a Second Coming... [Sandman drops the mic, and VDC exits the ring, staggering around, unable to see. Sandman calmly walks up the aisle while VDC flails around, trying to hit whatever comes near him.] TD: I'm thinking we have to get the Venusuan Death Cell under control. SR: Well, you're the one who seems to have the knack for that, Dross... TD: What are you talking about? SR: Just quit it, okay? TD: Before we get up to the ring for our next match, let's go to some comments from a man we saw make his debut on Wednesday night in Paris, one Mad Dog Watkins: [Cut to backstage at the last arena show, directly after Mad Dog Watkins has debuted impressively by destroying Majestic Maurice McAurthur. Standing at the entrance is an IIWF intern, set to give Watkins news of his admittance in the Lethal Lottery at Snow Brawl. In comes Mad Dog, and he looks visibly upset at being stopped by the kid.] IN: Mr. Watkins... hey, I've got some news for you. MD: [In his rough and gravelly voice] News? I'll tell you what news is! Just ask Triple M, as he picks his teeth up from the ring. Ask him what he thinks news is, and he'll tell you that Mad Dog just made an example out of him. And if you ask for a Triple M editorial, I guarantee you that it'll read "Don't Get in the Ring with that SOB." IN: Uhm... They wanted me to let you know that you have been chosen to be part of the Lethal Lottery at Snow Brawl. MD: They? They who? Spreadbury and the booking committee? Of course they want a legend like me to be at the pay-per-view. But you ask the other wrestlers if they want me there, and I bet you won't get too many takers. But I'll be there, and I don't give a damn about who my partner is -- but whoever it is had better be prepared, 'cuz I don't plan on leaving the arena a loser. Speaking of which, get out of my way, chump. [Watkins pushes aside the young intern, grabs his towel, and heads off to the dressing room. Cut back to ringside.] TD: Mad Dog Watkins doesn't exactly seem thrilled to be in the Lethal Lottery -- we'll have more names announced later on tonight, folks. For now, though, we must move on. Our next match pits the Arabian Knights against the Players' Club. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Arabian Knights vs. The Players' Club =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: With all the accolades of the Players' Club, they fail to impress me. SR: Well, these guys are friends of Dan Kauffman, you see, so they're a lot of "Flash," if you know what I mean... In the ring, they don't amount to much. TD: And judging by their win/loss record, you're correct. But you can never count an IIWF superstar tag team out at any time, Steve. SR: Sure I can... The Players' Club sucks. TD: Way to be impartial... RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this next tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, at a total combined weight of 595 lbs, led to the ring by Mr. Kaseem, here are Prince Abdul Akmar and Omar, the Arabian Knights! [Omar and Prince Abdul step out inot the aisle to a sizeable heel pop. They don't seem to care much, since the Prince acts as if the crowd loves him, and Omar is his usual quiet self.] TD: There's a real contrast in styles and attitudes in that team. Abdul is a lot of flash and talk, and Omar is all business. SR: But either of them could put any given man out on any given night. RA: Their opponents, at a total combined weight of 470 lbs, here are "Desirable" Danny Dynamite, Michael "Maverick" Reyna, The Players' Club! [The Players' Club theme music begins to play, and the two athletes step out into the aisle. The crowd gives a half-hearted pop as Dynamite and Reyna slap hands with some fans. The Players' Club enters the ring, and immediately get attacked by Omar, with Abdul shouting commands.] TD: And the Player Club are getting dominated already! SR: Surprise surprise... [Omar lays forearms into each member of the 'Club. Reyna and Dynamite are beaten down, but begin showing signs of retaliation. Each 'Club member blocks a shot from Omar, and they begin dishing out shots of their own. Omar is staggered, and Abdul is beside himself. Omar is forced back to the ropes, and both Reyna and Dynamite hit him with a dropkick. Omar falls over the top rope and onto the floor, hitting his head on the apron as he does. Abdul freezes in fear, and the Player's Club close in on him. Abdul holds his hands up, begging for mercy, but gets a double kick in the midsection for his troubles. Both Reyna and Dynamite lock on a suplex, and both lift Abdul into the air, then let him fall to the mat. The crowd shows a little more interest in the match, and pop for the double suplex. Reyna leaves the ring, and Dynamite drags Abdul to his feet.] TD: Well, the Player's Club is really trying to prove us wrong tonight! SR: Bahh... They still stink. TD: I think they might just pull this one off... Omar is still laying on the floor on the outside! I think he's unconscious! [Dynamite throws Abdul into the ropes, and hits a spinning leg lariat on the rebound. The crowd pops, and Dynamite tags in Reyna. Reyna enters the ring by leaping to the top rope and dropping an elbow onto the forehead of Abdul. Abdul's legs jerk up, and then fall to the mat, and Abdul just kind of lies there. Reyna calls to the crowd, and some people actually respond. Reyna drags Abdul up and throws him into the ropes, and hits a spinebuster on the rebound. The crowd pops a little more, and Reyna makes the tag to Dynamite. Reyna drags Abdul up again as Dynamite goes to the top rope. Reyna throws Abdul into the ropes, hits a tilt-a-whirl suplex on the rebound, and Dynamite comes off the top rope with a leg drop. Dynamite goes for the cover...] TD: This could be it! One! Two! Three! Yes! The Players' Club has broken their slump! SR: They got lucky... Omar was taken out early, and Abdul is no match for two men. TD: That might have been planned, though. Speaking of Omar, he's still on the floor, and hasn't moved. One of the officials has checked him, and is using smelling salts to wake him. SR: He'd better move fast once Omar wakes up... [The Players' Club leave Abdul laying in the ring, walking back up the aisle, where the fans are a little more willing to give the team the high five.] TD: Omar is awake now, but still a little groggy. SR: Omar won't be happy about this one... TD: Up next we're going to see two newcomers go at it: the bizarre circus performer Cheshire takes on the sinister Creed. Let's hear from Creed's manager, "The CEO" Jack Montgomery: [It's December 5th and the sleet lightly falls upon the surprisingly sparse streets of midnight midtown Manhattan. The camera focuses upon an enormous office complex and then pans to the only window in which the light still burns... the office of "The CEO" Jack Montgomery.) CEO: 121 years ago tonight, a man named Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart passed away. Perhaps some of you have heard of him. Perhaps not. Mozart's last words, as he drew his last breath, were, "I taste death." I somehow doubt that many men have ever understood, even for a second, what it was like to live inside of the brain of the great Mozart. But on Saturday night, at Albert Hall, for a glorious moment, Cheshire will feel exactly as Mozart did at the last moment of his life. Cheshire will know what it is like to taste death. Creed has come. [Cut back to ringside.] SR: [lets out a low whistle] Wow, Dross. Is it just me, or is that guy severely sinister? TD: He certainly is, Steve -- but wait until you see the monster, Creed. Let's go back up to the ring. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Creed vs. Cheshire -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= [Sparkplug Lee takes to the ring.] RA: My lords, ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, making his IIWF debut, hailing from Germany, weighing in at 220lbs, here is... Cheshire! [Little crowd reaction as "Guilty" by Gravity Kills starts up over the PA, and the spotlight picks out the slight form of Cheshire as he appears at the head of the aisle. Cheshire has a gaunt face and a wiry build, blond, tousled hair and ice-blue eyes. He wears colorful pantaloons and a red-green striped T-shirt. He is constantly grinning and giggling.] TD: What's with this guy? What's so funny? SR: He's probably giggling in anticipation of seeing just how bad your toupee really is. TD: Can we leave my hair out of this, Steve? SR: You would have thought you'd at least have enough respect to get a new rug made for when there's royalty about the place, but no, not you, Dross. TD: Please, Steve. [Cheshire makes his way down to the ring, pulling faces at the crowd as he goes. He climbs the ringsteps and bounces over the ropes into the ring.] RA: And introducing his opponent: also making his IIWF debut, hailing from parts unknowable, accompanied to the ring by "The CEO" Jack Montgomery, weighing in at 275lbs, here is... Creed! [The words "Anyone. Anywhere. Anytime." echo menacingly around the Royal Albert Hall, before the opening of the fourth movement of Beethoven's Ninth Symphony begin, and the lights drop, isolating the figures of Creed and his manager in a spotlight at the head of the aisle. He is of African-American descent, black as night, and is a powerfully built, muscular man. Creed cuts a formidable presence as he walks the aisle in his almost entirely black ring attire, black from his mouthguard to his boots, save for a brilliant, blood red glove on his left hand.] TD: There's that famous left hand, Steve. Possibly Creed's greatest weapon. Cheshire had better hope to stay out of that fist's way. SR: At least it's not made of steel, huh, Dross? TD: No, indeed not. [Creed steps into the ring, and Cheshire, who has seated himself leaning up against the turnbuckles in a corner, covers his mouth as he sniggers, before leaping to his feet and cartwheeling in front of Creed. He seems to regard him in an exaggerated manner, as if he were miming, and just as Creed makes a swipe with his right hand, Cheshire backflips out of reach, and giggles again. Montgomery holds the frustrated Creed back as the referee signals for the bell. Creed immediately goes after Cheshire, but the light heavyweight is able to sidestep his larger opponent with a variety of athletic flips and rolls. Cheshire slips behind Creed, taps him on the shoulder, and then hits him with an impressive standing dropkick. Big pop!] TD: That'll certainly get Creed's attention! SR: I'm not sure Cheshire wants to get this guy's attention, Dross. He's one big guy. [Cheshire showboats to the crowd as Creed quickly returns to his feet, and grabs the performer by the neck with his gloved left hand, executing a vicious chokeslam. Big gasp from the crowd.] TD: Wow! What a move! Creed practically planted Cheshire in the mat right there! SR: I think that was the beginning of the end for Cheshire right there -- Creed makes the cover! TD: One! Two! He got him -- no! No, Cheshire just kicked out! Boy, that was close. [Cheshire just manages to lift his shoulder, and rolls out of the way as Creed tries to stomp his opponent. Cheshire rolls to the outside to collect himself, and Creed follows him out. Cheshire is chased around the ringside area by Creed, eventually entering the ring and managing to stomp Creed as he follows him in. Suddenly, there is a commotion at the head of the aisle...] TD: Hold it! That's "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley! [Quigley walks down the aisle, ignoring the cheers of the crowd. He is wearing a black t-shirt, blue jeans with a few tears in the legs, sneakers, and his trademark leather jacket, with wire rimmed shades hanging from his collar. His hair is in its usual style, but the bangs in front are longer, and more stringy in his eyes. Quigley walks around the ring, trying to avoid the eager hands of the fans.] TD: I can't believe it! If Quigley hadn't showed up here tonight, his contract would have been terminated! SR: Damn, and we were so close. What's this moron doing? [Quigley grabs a steel chair from the timekeeper's table and throws it into the ring, sending the two wrestlers scattering. Quigley grabs another chair, and wields it as he climbs into the ring. Cheshire rolls out under the bottom rope, and Quigley strikes Creed over the head with the chair, knocking him to the outside! Big pop!] TD: Quigley can't just come out here and interfere in this match! What's the matter with him?! [The referee signals for the bell, and various officials restrain Cheshire and Creed on the outside, eventually forcing them up the aisle away from the ring. In the ring, Chris Quigley drops the chair in front of him, and grabs a microphone, as the crowd quickly dies down to hear what he has to say...] CQ: Dross! Get up here! You've been drooling over the chance to interview me for a month now. Here's your chance. Every wrestling fan in the world is tuned in right now... don't blow it. [Dross, looking a little surprised at Quigley's comments, nonetheless rises eagerly from his chair and quickly enters the ring. Dross extends his hand for a handshake, but Quigley just shoves the microphone in his hand instead.] TD: Chris, this is a great, great surprise. If you hadn't shown up here in London tonight, you would have been terminated from the IIWF roster. That would have been terrible. CQ: I came tonight because I was damn well ready to come tonight, Dross. The IIWF suits have never been able to make me do anything I didn't want to do, and it ain't going to start now. TD: [taken aback] Uh... well Chris, the main question on everyone's mind, I guess, would have to be, where were you for the last month? CQ: Dross, no matter how hard the IIWF tried, they couldn't track me down. They went east, west, north, south, but came out short. I left my tracks well covered. I was in Phoenix, Arizona. Why I was there doesn't really concern you, but that's where I was. Let's just say I got an old friend to help me regain my killer instinct that has slowly drained away since I joined the IIWF. TD: Who would this old friend be? CQ: I said it didn't concern you, Dross. It really doesn't concern ANYONE. TD: Chris, I've really never seen this side of you before... CQ: That's because I don't feel like I've really been myself in this Federation, Dross. It seems to me that the IIWF wants you to be clear cut, either on the side of the fans or against them. In every other federation, I do what I damn well please, and the fans cheer me because I am the BEST. The fact of the matter is Dross, I appreciate the fans support. Hell, without them none of us would be doing what we're doing. But I do what I have to do to win. If I smack a guy with a chair and you wanna boo me, go ahead and boo me! I'm sick and tired of being held back by the mold of a role model that the IIWF suits have given me. I was a bad ass and a lone wolf before being a bad ass and a lone wolf was cool, and it's time I return to what brought me to the dance! TD: I have to ask you, what are your thoughts on Dan Kauffman? [crowd pop] CQ: My thoughts on Kauffman? Great wrestler. Probably the greatest World champion the IIWF has ever seen. It's just too bad he'll go down as a controversial champion. No matter what condition I was in, Dan Kauffman has NO business sticking his nose where it doesn't belong. He ripped me off, plain and simple, and don't you think for a minute Kauffman, that I've forgotten about that. You talk about how Cadaver and Deathbringer will be your greatest challenge to overcome? I think it's time you wake up to the real world and realize that once you get past all this death garbage... you have the greatest technical wrestler of all time staring you in the face! Kauffman... you say you're "pound for pound, the toughest man in the world"? I'd love to put that to the test, because if you ask me, that title is MINE! You may be physically tough, maybe just as tough as me, although I doubt it. But you are NOT mentally tough, Kauffman. You've been sucked in to the world of superstition and fear by Cadaver and Deathbringer. That's something that I would never let happen to me! [Quigley signals to the rafters at somebody and all of a sudden the arena lights go black...] TD: What the...?! CQ: Cadaver? Deathbringer? You want to come out here now? This is just the way you two like it! No? I didn't think so. Turn the lights back on. [The lights come back on] TD: Chris, I don't know what you just tried to prove but... CQ: What I just TRIED to prove, Dross, is that I have it all over Kauffman up here. [taps his head] I don't think Kauffman would have the guts to do that. He's overwhelmed with fear of those two. There is no way a capable fighter like Kauffman should have trouble with Cadaver, but I watched them fight. Kauffman was OVERMATCHED. He would have lost that match if not for an idiotic move by Cadaver and Deathbringer. All I can say Kauffman is SNAP OUT OF IT. If we ever meet, and you're looking over your shoulders for Cadaver and Deathbringer? I'll CRIPPLE you! [mixed crowd pop] TD: Well Chris, can I ask you... CQ: As far as I'm concerned, this interview is OVER, Dross. "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley is back, and whether ya love me or ya hate me, the IIWF just regained the man who will carry the federation into the next century! One by one... Otto Verhoeven... Dan Kauffman... you WILL be STRUCK DOWN! [Quigley walks away from Dross, sliding underneath the bottom rope and walking back down the aisle, slapping a few hands forcefully as he leaves to a tremendous crowd pop, while "For Those About to Rock" strains over the PA for the first time in a while... Dross returns to his ringside seat.] TD: I don't know what to say. Chris Quigley is back, folks. SR: Quigley just makes me laugh, Dross. If he thinks this "bad-ass" attitude is fooling anybody, he should get in the ring with a real man like Otto Verhoeven -- then we'll see what kind of a bad-ass he can be. TD: Well, it seems Quigley has his own agenda here in the IIWF, Steve. Who knows what's next? SR: Perhaps he'll put his money where his mouth is and get into the damned ring for a change. TD: Well, Cheshire and Creed won't be too happy that their match was so rudely interrupted. I'm sure a rematch will be sanctioned at the earliest opportunity. Let's move on to our next match up. Tiger Claw takes on the Mexican superstar, Onslaught, in what should be a classic cruiserweight battle. Steve? SR: Mr. Kobiashi wants Onslaught out of action. Josey Wales started it on Wednesday, and Tiger Claw's going to finish the job here. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Tiger Claw vs. Onslaught -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= RA: The next contest is scheduled for one fall, with a thirty-minute time limit. Introducing first, weighing 220lbs and hailing from Thailand, accompanied by his manager, Brian Lau, here is... Tiiiiiggeeerr Claaawww! [Tiger Claw's Thai boxing music starts up over the PA system, and he enters the aisle to a big heel pop. Brian Lau quickly follows him, and they walk to the ring in deep conversation. Claw vaults over the top rope, and receives some last minute advice from Lau on the apron...] RA: And his opponent, weighing 229lbs and hailing from Mexico City, here is... Onnnnsllaaaaauugggghht! [Big face pop as the lights go out, and red mist begins to fill the aisle. The theme from "Dune" kicks in over the PA, and Onslaught appears at the head of the aisle. He slowly makes his way to ringside, slapping the fans' hands. He leaps to the ring apron and to the top rope, before flipping into the ring and spraying a red mist from his mouth into the air. Another big face pop!] TD: Onslaught seems almost as popular here in England as he was in Mexico! SR: They're probably just short of excitement... [The bell rings, and both men circle each other. They lock up, and Onslaught takes Claw down with an armdrag, before backing off. Claw flips back up to his feet, and both men lock up again. Onslaught takes the advantage again, this time with a headlock, which Claw reverses into a hammerlock. Onslaught reverses that into a hammerlock of his own, before moving back to the side headlock and twisting Claw to the mat. Claw retaliates with a legscissors, Onslaught breaks, and both men flip to their feet at the same time! Big crowd pop!] TD: And that was an impressive start by both competitors! They look to be pretty well balanced here, Steve! SR: No way. Claw's the much better athlete. [Claw drops back to his corner to pick up some advice from Brian Lau, as Onslaught waits. Both men move to lock up again, and Onslaught slips behind with a waistlock. Claw reaches behind him, trying to get hold of Onslaught, and catches his neck, taking him down with a snapmare. Claw tries an elbowdrop, and Onslaught rolls out of the way! Both men back to their feet, and Claw takes a dropkick that knocks him back into the corner, and Onslaught follows up with a monkey flip. Claw back to his feet again, and Onslaught hits him with another headlock takedown! Big crowd pop!] TD: Onslaught's showing some pretty impressive technical skills here... he's keeping Claw well and truly grounded! [Onslaught pushes Claw's shoulders down into a pinning position, and the referee counts - 1 - Claw pushes himself up. Claw rolls Onslaught into a pin - 1 - 2 - Onslaught rolls out of it, and Claw uses the momentum to get back to one knee. Claw pushes himself up to his feet, and grabs Onslaught by the waist, trying a back suplex... Onslaught flips over the top, and lands on his feet! Big crowd pop! Claw turns, sees Onslaught and tries a side kick to the head, Onslaught ducks under, runs to the ropes, and takes Claw down with a flying elbowsmash! Onslaught drags Claw to his feet, whips him to the turnbuckle, and follows through with a charge... Big heel pop!] TD: Claw moved out of the way at the last moment! And Onslaught crashed straight into the ringpost shoulder first! He's stunned! SR: Now Claw's gonna take him apart! Just you watch! [Claw drags Onslaught out of the corner and nails him with a waistlock suplex. He makes the cover - 1 - 2 - kickout by Onslaught! Claw picks him to his feet, nails him with a roundhouse kick to the ribs, and immediately flies into his Punching Fury, backing Onslaught to the corner. He continues to pound on Onslaught, now with his Knee Fury, before hiptossing Onslaught into the center of the ring. Big heel pop!] TD: Claw definitely knows how to take and maintain the advantage in a match, that's for certain. SR: And he knows how to punish his opponents as well. [Claw picks Onslaught to his feet, and gets caught in a small package! Count - 1 - 2 - kickout by Claw, and he drops an elbow across Onslaught as he tries to get up! Suddenly, there's a huge mixed pop from the crowd...] TD: What...? Hakiro Matsuoko's coming down to ringside! What does he want here, Steve? SR: Why are you asking me? [Hakiro stops at the head of the aisle, and starts watching the match. Brain Lau moves over to say something, but Hakiro ignores him. Lau shouts at him, and Hakiro still says nothing. Lau throws his hands up in exasperation and moves back to Claw's corner... In the ring, Claw continues to work over Onslaught, scoop-slamming him and then dropping a leg drop across Onslaught's throat. Claw notices the Angel of the Sun and shouts something at him. Again, Hakiro looks on impassively. Claw shrugs, drags Onslaught to his feet and almost takes his head off with a back heel kick. Claw with a cover - 1 - 2 - kickout by Onslaught. Claw moves over, and locks a camel clutch on Onslaught in the center of the ring. The referee asks him for the submission -- Onslaught shakes his head, and Claw piles on the pressure.] TD: Hakiro's ignoring Brian Lau... he seems focused on the match. Could he be watching Claw? [The referee asks Onslaught again, still no submission. Onslaught manages to get his knees under him, removing some of the pressure. Claw keeps the chinlock on, and Onslaught pushes himself to his feet, hoisting Claw into the air, before falling backwards to the mat on top of Claw! Big crowd pop!] TD: And that took the wind out of Tiger Claw! SR: Come on Claw, get back on him! [Both men start pushing themselves to their feet, and Claw, appearing to recover first, charges Onslaught with a clothesline... Onslaught ducks and comes off the opposite ropes... spinwheel kick on Claw! Big crowd pop! Onslaught covers, hooks the leg - 1 - 2 - kickout! Onslaught pulls Claw to his feet again, whip to the ropes... over the head belly-to-belly suplex! Onslaught throws his hands in the air, and climbs to the top rope! Flying legdrop... and Claw moves out of the way! Gasps from the crowd! Claw gets to his knees, and picks Onslaught back to his feet. Claw with an elbowsmash... and another... backs Onslaught into the ropes... Irish whip... and Claw nails him with a flying forearm smash on the rebound! Claw scoops Onslaught to his feet, and nails him with a spinning neckbreaker! He signals for the Golden Tiger Strike!] TD: Onslaught's in deep trouble here again, and now Claw's looking to finish him off... [Claw vaults to the apron, and starts to climb to the top rope. Onslaught starts to stir on the mat. Claw pauses to yell at Hakiro Matsuoko from the apron, and Onslaught flips to his feet. Big crowd pop! Claw turns back around, and looks on in shock as Onslaught charges him and nails him with a high drop kick that drops him stunned onto the top turnbuckle! Another big crowd pop!] SR: No! TD: Onslaught now... climbing the turnbuckles... Claw stops him with a right hand, and Onslaught stops him with five! [Big crowd pop!] Onslaught now... standing over Claw... what's he going to do? SR: Oh no! [Camera flashes go off all the way around the arena as Onslaught leaps up, wraps his head around Tiger Claw's head and Frankensteiners him back into the ring! Huge crowd pop! Brian Lau holds his head on the outside... Onslaught flips back to his feet, and covers Claw near the ropes, just as Hakiro Matsuoko stirs into life.] TD: Hakiro's caught hold of Tiger Claw's leg! He's holding him down! [The referee counts - 1 - 2 - Claw tries to kick out - 3! Huge mixed pop! Hakiro turns satisfied and walks back to the dressing rooms, quickly followed by Brian Lau, who yells at Hakiro and pushes him! Hakiro turns back around, and glares at Lau, who quickly backs off.] RA: Here is your winner, as a result of a pinfall... Onslaught! SR: What does Hakiro think he's doing? TD: I guess that brawl last week relit his hatred for Tiger Claw... SR: _He_ [pointing at Hakiro] is a dead man. [Brian Lau jumps into the ring as Onslaught celebrates with the crowd, and begins arguing with the official, who shakes his head. Tiger Claw gets dazedly to his feet, and both he and Brian Lau make their way to the back, Tiger Claw breaking into a run as he nears the dressing rooms...] TD: Tiger Claw doesn't look happy at all, and neither does Brian Lau... and you can guess who they'll be looking for back there. SR: If they find Hakiro, they'll make mince-meat out of him. TD: What a match that was. Right now, it's time to hear from a newcomer to the IIWF. Another established journeyman has beat a path to the IIWF's door, and has demanded entry. He even flew out here to London just to give the following interview. What do you know about a guy called Serge Annis, Steve? SR: Serge Annis is in the IIWF? Wow! This guy is known as the "epitome of evil" -- and with good reason. This man breaks bones, Dross. TD: Well, let's hope he doesn't break any of Larry Morton's bones. Over to you, Larry. [Larry Morton is standing in the ring. He has a mic.] LM: Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you the IIWF's newest entrant, he is the Epitome of Evil, Serge Annis! ["Some Days it's Dark" by Death Lurks plays, and the lights go out. The four corners of the ring begin to spew flames, and so does the aisle entrance. A 6'8" man wearing black ring pants and sporting a crew cut emerges. An evil grin appears on Serge's face. He heads down the aisle, but stops when he sees a fan's sign saying Lethal Protector. Annis's grin turns to a stone cold stare and he heads into the ring. Morton seems intimidated by Annis.] LM: Serge Annis, may I be the first to welcome you to IIWF. SA: I don't need a welcoming. All I need is a bunch of necks to snap. [Morton looks confused] LM: Okay... Mr. Annis. You are well known in wrestling. You are a former UWF World champion, and have dominated the UWF since your arrival. You.... SA: SHUT UP! _THAT_ was in the Universal Wrestling Federation! This is the IIWF! That means nothing here! I intend to make a name for myself here, and not go on my name alone.... soon all of you IIWF wrestlers... and all you IIWF fans will learn why I am called the Epitome of Evil... LM: All right. Sorry, Mr. Annis.... Serge, what are your plans for your IIWF career? SA: To plain and simply.... spread the wrath of Annis upon all these unfortunate souls here... I am a different side of the darkness that surrounds a lot of people... I am a _MUCH_ scarier, darker side of justice... and for all of those who cannot handle the Epitome of Evil... will find their necks snapped in vain.... because I am here to unleash the Wrath of Annis on EVERYONE! LM: What do you mean by "snap someone's neck?" [Serge grabs Morton by his collar] SA: When I pick someone up, Morton.... and bring them down to the mat... to the floor... or even concrete with a chokeslam... it will feel as if I have snapped your neck... twisted your tendons... and stomped on your soul.... [Annis unhands Larry, who looks ruffled.] LM: Serge... I know you don't want to talk about your past with UWF, but I want to bring up something: You won a Universe award for "Most Psychotic Wrestler." And you stomped on the award and set it afire. Why? [Serge stares straight at Morton] SA: For one simple reason.... I AM NOT A PSYCHO! If I _am_ a psycho, may it be known that I am the smartest psychopath ever. And if you think I am a psycho.... then you suffer from a big psychosis... LM: All right, fair enough. Serge, you placed third in a very big tournament many months ago, the WCeW. Third out of some sixty-four entrants, might I add.... SA: That is why I am here... LM: What? Anyways, Serge, you went through many opponents, including the IIWF's World Champion, Dan Kauffman as you pinned his shoulders to the mat for three. SA: That is right... I pinned the IIWF World champion... I PINNED THE IIWF WORLD CHAMPION! DAN KAUFFMAN! REMEMBER ME?! I AM HERE.... I am here.... to finish the job... I am here to destroy you for good. It never finished in WCeW as you whined your pathetic @$$ off.... and in the RINGLORD, you are doing the same... I came here... to shut you up, Kauffman... I came here... to pin your shoulders once again... LM: Mr. Annis, please! Just because you are a big name elsewhere, doesn't mean you can walk into IIWF and start something with the World Champion Dan Kauffman in hopes of getting a title shot! You have to prove yourself first! [Serge looks very ticked off and screams right at Morton] SA: I NEVER ONCE SAID I WANTED A STINKING WORLD TITLE SHOT! I AM NOT AS DUMB AS YOU LOOK! WHAT I SAID WAS I WANTED DAN KAUFFMAN! NOT HIS TITLE! Don't put words in my mouth, Morton, or else those words will come back and haunt you... Kauffman! I want to make your life a living hell... I want you to go through, what I have gone through my entire life... the pain... the torment... the torture... and I promise... you won't last one day with what I... have put up with for 27 years..... Kauffman, I will chokeslam you through the Earth if I have to... LM: A match with Dan Kauffman will have to wait, Serge, because you have to prove yourself first. SA: Oh, I intend to, Morton. I intend on backing up what I claim... and when the time is right... "Flash" will feel my five fingers upside his neck and he will go up in a chokeslam... but go down in much much more. LM: Is there anything else you would like to add, Serge? [Annis stares right into the camera.] SA: Stare into my eyes.... look deep... they say that the eyes are a window to the soul... look deep into my soul... look into the fiery rage that burns within me.... stare into the face of not certain death... but something much much more worse.... for everyone in IIWF... I promise you... the days have gotten a lot darker now.... and anyone that crosses me... will feel the wrath of Annis... and that is not a threat... but a promise. ["Some Days it's Dark plays again" and Annis raises his hands. A small pocket of fans cheer him, but the overwhelming reaction is one of jeering. Annis smiles as if he likes the reception and heads backstage mouthing the word: "K-A-U-F-F-M-A-N." Larry shakes his head and leaves the ring. Cut to the broadcast booth once more.] TD: Wow. Annis may say he's not a psychopath, but he seems fairly unhinged to me, Steve. SR: Don't be fooled, Dross. That guy is one of the smartest wrestlers in the sport. Dan Kauffman's life just got a little bit worse. TD: Okay, let's move on to two more unsavoury individuals, but these two will meet in the ring -- "Painbringer" Billy Sexton battles Steve "the Fury" Kowalski. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- "Painbringer" Billy Sexton vs. Steve "the Fury" Kowalski -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: This bout should be an all out brawl between two men who are seeking a shot at Billy Shakespeare's Intercontinental title. SR: It should be great, but what are Sexton's chances with this conspiracy against him? TD: We'll just have to see. Let's go up to Sparkplug Lee. [slight chuckle] SR: Dross, you're a poet, and no one even cares. TD: Don't you mean "and I don't even know it"? SR: No. TD: [sigh] Let's go to the ring introductions. RA: This next contest is scheduled for one fall. First making his way down the aisle, weighing in at 268lbs, hailing from Newark, New Jersey, he is Steve "The Fury" Kowalski! [A huge heel pop as Kowalski stands at the head of the runway as "Don't Fear the Reaper" by Blue Oyster Cult blares over the PA. Kowalski slowly makes his way down the aisle jarring with many fans. He finally makes his way into the ring and anxiously looks up the runway waiting for his opponent.] RA: His opponent, weighing in at 245lbs, hailing from Wawa, Ontario, Canada, here is "Painbringer" Billy Sexton! [Another rather large heel pop as Sexton comes out to "TNT" by AC/DC. Sexton quickly makes his way into the ring and grabs the mic from Sparkplug Lee.] TD: Don't tell me -- he's going to demand new officials again. BS: Shut up! [the crowd settles] Before I allow this match to get started, I demand a new referee and timekeeper -- ones that aren't paid off by that fraud, Billy Shakespeare. [The referee begins to argue with Sexton, stating how ridiculous this is. As Sexton continues to argue with the ref, Kowalski levels him from behind with a big running lariat.] TD: Wow! Now that is what I call a lariat. SR: Yeah, but this caused the match to be started without a change of officials! Sexton is going to get ripped off. TD: Maybe this will be the perfect time to prove there is no conspiracy against Sexton. [Kowalski throws Sexton over the top rope and quickly follows him out. Kowalski lifts Sexton up and hotshots him on the guardrail to some hardcore cheers. Sexton is then whipped hard into the guardrail with a huge clang. Kowalski then runs and clotheslines Sexton over the guardrail and into the crowd. Kowalski follows him out and suplexes Sexton on the hard unpadded concrete floor, almost hitting some fans. Kowalski then takes a chair, abandoned by a man who moved out of the way to avoid the suplex, and jabs it into Sexton's chest.] TD: You must be loving this, Steve. This match is totally out of control. SR: I would usually, but it has been rather one-sided, and the referee has seemingly let Kowalski get away with more then usual. Seems like Sexton's case can only be strengthened here, Dross. TD: Well, this match is far from over. We'll just have to see how things progress. We know Sexton won't hesitate from bending the rules either. [Kowalski then lifts up the prone Sexton and executes a fallaway slam over the guardrail and back into the ringside area. Kowalski makes his way over the barrier to follow up on Sexton but receives a low blow that winds him.] TD: Ow! Kowalski's voice is going to be a little higher after that blow. SR: Isn't it just ironic that the whole time Kowalski was in control out there, the ref's count never reached ten, Dross. TD: The action has been rather quick... Maybe the ref is lenient since he knows this is both of these wrestlers' style. SR: Keep on making excuses, Dross. [Sexton then lifts up the winded Kowalksi and throws him back into the ring. Sexton lays on several kicks onto Kowalski's body. He whips Kowalksi off the ropes and delivers a harsh side suplex. Sexton drops several elbowsmahes and hard forearms onto a hurting Kowlaksi before lifting him up for a backbreaker. He then turns Kowalksi over for a Boston crab and cinches it in for the fullest effect. Kowalksi screams and yells out a few curses inbetween. Sexton then suddenly releases the hold and begins to celebrate, but the referee confronts him.] TD: It seems Sexton thinks Kowalski submitted. SR: Despite how much I like Kowalski, I will have to agree with him, Dross. TD: I have to disagree. Sexton must have been so eager to win this thing that he thought he heard Kowalski quit. [Huge pop as Billy Shakespeare appears in the runway. Sexton notices Shakespeare and forgets the ref to yell at the champ.] SR: Seems Shakespeare has come to admire his handiwork. TD: What do you mean, Steve? SR: He's watching to see how well the referee works against Sexton. [Sexton finally turns to receive a hard kick to the midsection and then a devastating tiger driver. Kowalksi then lifts up Sexton and rams his head hard into the turnbuckles. Kowalksi flings Sexton into the other corner and comes charging in with a huge lariat, before peppering him with several forearms and solid punches. Sexton begins to back away as Kowalski comes in for the kill, but Sexton grabs Kowalski by the tights and flips him through the ropes and to the outside.] SR: Sexton's turn to play dirty. _Now_ how's the ref going to react? TD: Just the same as he did for Kowalski. [Sexton grabs Kowalski by the head and rams him hard into the ringpost, which has Kowalski falling hard to the floor. Sexton lifts Kowalski back up and whips him hard into the ringsteps with a huge crash, sending Kowalksi flying over the steps and landing hard on the ringside floor. Sexton then comes in on his prey and lifts up Kowalksi for a piledriver but it is blocked by Kowalski and instead has Sexton crashing hard down below courtesy of a backdrop.] TD: Despite your accusations, Steve, you have to admit this one is a donneybrook. SR: No, but it sure is one hell of a brawl. TD: [sigh] Of course. [Kowalski takes a chair from ringside and swings hard at Sexton but Sexton ducks as the chair hits the ringpost full force. The aftershock forces Kowalski to drop the chair. Sexton then picks it up and prepares to hit Kowalski but the ref grabs hold of the chair, preventing Sexton from hitting Kowalksi. Kowalksi gets up, kicks Sexton in the gut, and snatches the chair from the ref. Kowalski then waffles Sexton over the head with the steel chair.] SR: Now what was that, Dross? If that doesn't prove it, then I don't know what does. The ref didn't allow Sexton to use the chair but then lets Kowalski use it? How are you going to get out of this one, Dross? TD: The ref tried to stop Sexton from using the chair, but Kowalksi just snatched it from the ref's hands before he could do anything. SR: You're really digging, Dross. [Kowalski rolls Sexton back in the ring and delivers the Skullpump piledriver on the unconscious Sexton. Kowalksi rolls him over for the cover as the ref counts - 1 - 2 - 3! Kowalksi then raises his arm in victory to a fair sized heel pop along with some hardcore cheers. Shakespeare then turns back to the dressing room as Kowalski grabs Sexton by the hair and drags him to one corner of the ring.] SR: Shakesspeare leaves knowing that yet again he bought the best money can buy. TD: Come on, Steve. I know it was a controversial ending, but you still can't blame Shakespeare. Both men were openly breaking the rules in this one. SR: Sure, but when did the ref try to stop Kowalski from cheating? TD: I'm still not convinced of any conspiracy, Steve. SR: It's obvious that the front office is corrupted, and you can't deny it. TD: I think I just did. Hang on, Kowalski is beckoning over a cameraman: [Kowalski holds Sexton by the hair, pointing at him, and howls at the camera.] SK: There ya go, Spreadbury! 'Nother body to throw on the pile! Ya can hide Shakes, but ya can't stop me! I _will_ tear IIWF a new hole 'til ya give me that sorry excuse for a man! You got one month, Danny! Make the match happen or I'm comin' for _YOU_! [Sexton takes a groggy swipe at Kowalski, who drops him to the mat to be tended to by officials as he leaves the ring and heads up the aisle.] TD: Kowalski is in major need of an attitude adjustment. Anyway, let's go to our next match, as Deathbringer takes on the arrogant "Superstar" Stud Stetson. Let's get some pretaped comments from Stetson now, who still seems more than a little preoccupied with Marty Warnett: [SCENE: A busy General Hospital, doctors and nurses are seen tending to the horde of patients. Emerging from the hectic scenery is "Superstar" Stud Stetson carrying his aliminium baseball bat.] SS: Marty Warnett, get used to these surroundings because you will be spending the rest of your days here. I have proven time and time again that I have your number. I am controlling your own destiny. I have your career in the palm of my hands. I have attacked you on three occasions, Warnett, and all three showed you walking right into a perfect setup. Which a young pup like you often does. All that drug use and "after hours" activity has blurred your brain and proven you easy pickings. Warnett, I am far greater than you and I am this federation's only Superstar, but you have something that makes you such a worthy prize. You have the adoration of all these moronic fans and the backing of this federation's imbecilic president. But after you are stretchered out for the final time and ponder your finished career for rest of your life here, they will have no choice but realize who I really am, the next ruler of the IIWF. [Stetson stops one of the busy doctors.] SS: Hey doc, can you tell me how you would rate this joint? DO: Pardon? SS: The hospital, moron, how would you rate this hospital's service? DO: We have some of the best physicians in the world and are up to date on all technology. SS: That's great, glad to hear it. See Warnett, I'm not such a bad guy. I made sure you would be treated by the best and even though I am going to definitely end your career, you can rest assured you will survive. You may even be able to walk again, if a miracle occurs. [Stetson chuckles] But I'll tell you this, you'll wish I never picked you as a target. Which I can't really be blamed for becasue it is my duty to take out all these scums who think they are superstars and are hogging my spotlight. [Stetson makes his way through the corridors until reaching the hospital's morgue.] SS: Death. No, Marty, I promised you won't recieve this but come this weekend I will have my brush with it. Deathbringer, when I orignally came here you where a hero of the fans, just like Warnett. You were definitely one that I wanted to experience a Superstar Attack. But recently your changes have drawn some respect from me which is very hard to earn. But that doesn't mean that I still wouldn't love to tear you apart. You are high on the IIWF food chain and you are considered by many a top star, maybe the top. But you see Mr. Bringer, I am the top dog and you may be the one that finally gives me my much deserved fame. Deathbringer, I do not fear death. Because all the true Superstars of history have lived on through it. Many say the King of Rock and Roll still lives today. You see Deathbringer, when you reach true greatness like me, you never die. I am a legend in the making and you will not stop my legacy. You are too taken up in your quest to claim that useless windbag known as Dan Kauffman. Something I respect, but come this Sauturday it will be your downfall. You may have the supernatural on your side but I have [bleep]ing five pounds of aliminum as my enforcer that says that I am not going down. [He raises his bat and strikes the wall hard with it, leaving a crack.] After this Saturday I will have earned the respect of all here in the IIWF because I am truly the greatest ever to grace the wrestling ring. [Stetson glares at the camera and then begins to speak again] SS: And at Snow Brawl I will also let my presence be known. Not only will I defeat the best of the IIWF to earn a shot at the gold, not only will I stride down the aisle with the goddess of wrestling, but I will have the ultimate unveiling. I will reveal to the IIWF its greatest addition. It will prove beyond a shadow of doubt that when it comes to Superstars, I put everyone to shame. [Stetson then stares coldly into the camera. He mouths, "Beware. Beware, I'm coming for you." and then lifts his bat high in the air as the camera suddenly goes to black. Cut back to ringside.] TD: If Stetson thinks that bat will have any effect on Deathbringer, he's got another thing coming, Steve. SR: I like Stetson's style, Dross, but I think Deathbringer is on a roll at the moment, and ol' Walnut is probably going to stick his nose in this match. The deck's stacked against Stetson, Dross. TD: I don't know about that, Steve. Let's get back up to the ring. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Deathbringer vs. "Superstar" Stud Stetson =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Deathbringer wants everyone in the IIWF to know that he means business, and he doesn't care who he beats up to get that message across. SR: Exactly. Deathbringer has really done well since he made up his own agenda. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Playing for these fans is the worst mistake a wrestler can make. TD: Well, let's just agree to disagree on that point. The fact still remains that Deathbringer is an awesome competitor, though. SR: But Stetson is no slouch... TD: Let's get to the ring for the introductions... RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this next match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, weighing in at 285 pounds, "Superstar" Stud Stetson! [Stetson appears at the head of the aisle as "Rain Will Fall" plays. The crowd gives him a solid heel pop, but he just flips them off. Stetson walks to the ring and goes through some stretches.] TD: I wonder where Lace is... SR: I'm just going to leave that one alone... TD: Come on, Steve, you always have some comment about the ladies... SR: And I always end up getting pushed around for it... I'd fight back, but, well, my injury... TD: Of course. RA: His opponent, weighing in at 324 lbs and hailing from the Dark Side... [There is a big heel pop as the lights drop.] Here is Deathbringer!! [The lights come back up, and Deathbringer is standing in the ring. Stetson immediately flies towards him with an elbow to the face. Deathbringer falls back, and Stetson follows up with some kicks, then powerbombs the big man. The crowd pops at the feat, and Stetson follows up with a leg drop, then a cover... 1 - 2 Kickout by Deathbringer. Deathbringer slowly gets to his feet, but is cut off by Stetson, who sweeps out the big man's legs. Deathbringer falls to the mat, and Stetson locks on a headlock. Deathbringer gets to his feet and throws Stetson into the ropes Stetson comes back and ducks a flying clothesline attempt by Deathbringer. Deathbringer falls to the mat again, and Stetson comes off the ropes on the other side, then executes a splash. Stetson goes for the cover... 1 - 2 - Kickout by Deathbringer. Stetson drags Deathbringer up and holds his fist up for the crowd. The crowd gives a mixed pop to the showboating, and Stetson sets Deathbringer up for a huge right hand. Stetson lets it fly, but the fist is caught by Deathbringer.] TD: Now Stetson's in trouble. [Stetson's eyes grow wide, and Deathbringer uses his arm to lift Stetson into the air, and then slam him down to the mat. There is a huge heel pop as Deathbringer holds his arms up. Stetson struggles to his feet, and is caught by Deathbringer in a chokeslam. Before Deathbringer can go for the cover, however, Stetson rolls out of the ring. Stetson goes out to the floor, and continues walking up the aisle, waving his arms, apparently quitting. The crowd give a heel pop as he makes his way from the ring, but begin cheering as Marty Warnett comes out into the aisle. Stetson stops and looks at Warnett, who has his fists up. Stetson backs off, holding up his hands. Warnett points back to the ring, telling Stetson to get back into the match. He then begins closing in on Stetson, who backs off. This goes on for a few moments until Bringer grabs Stetson from behind and hoists him over his head. Deathbringer throws Stetson back into the ring over the top rope, and Warnett goes back to the locker room area.] SR: There's Warnett sticking his nose in everyone's business again... TD: At least we're going to se a pinfall victory now... [Deathbringer gets into the ring and puts Stetson into the tombstone piledriver position. He then goes to the second turnbuckle for the Burial. The crowd gives a deafening heel pop as Deathbringer drives Stetson into the mat. Deathbringer covers with one hand... 1 - 2 - 3!! Ding! Ding! Huge heel pop!] TD: Once he hits the Burial, nobody can get up. SR: That's right... It's a devastating manoeuvre. [Deathbringer rolls Stetson out of the ring and stands in the centre with his arms held high. The lights drop, then come up. Deathbringer is gone.] TD: And as quickly as he got here, he's gone. SR: You better believe that he's ready to go after the World title again. TD: He certainly looks it. Without further ado, folks, let's go over to Becky LaRue for this week's instalment of "LaRue's Lair". [The camera cuts to the "LaRue's Lair" set. Becky is already on the lounge chair, reading something, and talking to the floor manager.] BL: Toad in the Hole? Bubble and Squeak? Pig and Whistle? And I thought the IIWF Coliseum had a lousy menu. Oh well. They say in Heaven the English are the police and the Germans are the chefs. In Hell it's the other way around. [She looks up suddenly] Are we live? Oh. Hello. My next guests actually petitioned the front office to get on my segment. And as you all know, I'm a fool for men who beg me. So without further ado, welcome G.W.R.! [There is suprising support from the partisan crowd. General Kane accompanies Spoiler and Loco. Loco slumps in the chair farthest away from Becky. The camera pans over three men who have painted G.W.R. on their chests. Cut back to Becky.] BL: First, tell me how wonderful I am for having you on the show. SPOILER: Yeah, mind you, I would have, had there been a larger queue to get here. After all, this is the number one interview spot... BL: There's gratitude for you. Moving on... Armed Forces, and especially their bedwetting manager, seem to have developed a problem with you. Any comment? SPOILER: Yeah. Lots of comments, but most of them would get us in big trouble with the censors. KANE: The Armed Forces [He leans forward, looking directly into the camera] The Armed Forces. [He pauses again] You know, they're a disgrace to the name and the idea of the military. And to make matters worse, they run around with someone who's sole claim to fame is that he carries golf clubs. You know, I've heard rumours that Aaron was questioning my credentials. Mind you, it's understandable I suppose, given that he doesn't have any credentials of his own... BL: No credentials... hee hee... a club, but no balls. SPOILER: They've got our attention now, which is something I don't think they wanted. BL: How do you feel about having been left out of the eight man tag match? SPOLIER: I don't know. I don't think we were ever really in consideration for that match so... [He pauses] It would have been different if we'd been offered the match. And besides, whose side would we have been on? We don't have problems as such with any of the teams involved, but we don't really get on with any of them either so... BL: This is boring, let's try something new. If G.W.R. were an animal, what would it be? SPOILER: [Has a bit of a perplexed expression] Uhm, interesting question. [He turns to Loco for a second] LOCO: A bear. SPOILER: I would have said a puma actually, but there you go. BL: Okay, not so great a question. Back to business: Who do you see as the teams to beat? GK: All of them. SPOILER: That's the real answer, but if you want us to single out teams, uhm, well if we could beat RSR... BL: Hm, not much heat there. I've been wondering. What _exactly_ does G.W.R. mean anyway? GK: You know, it's ironic that you should ask that in Britain. SPOILER: It's the name of an old railway company. It ran trains from London to Wales and the West. We just used it because, well it sounds interesting, you know. BL: Well, I'll be. Looks like I just lost five bucks to Steve on that bet. So, Spoiler, Loco, what makes you so mean? SPOILER: It's genetic. BL: [With an appraising eye] And that isn't all that's genetic I see. So, who impresses _you_ in this fed? GK: Singles or tag? Uhm, singles wise, Lord Byron who is possibly one of the greatest pure wrestlers out there at the moment and Marty Warnett, who seems to have attracted more than his fair share of attention to be honest. Tag wise, RSR, just because they've gone unbeaten for so long. SPOILER: I'd go with the boss man. But I will add Danny Kauffman to the list. BL: [Still appraising] General Kane, where do you go to find brutes such as these? GK: Believe it or not, they found me. SPOILER: Yeah we've been around for a while and we'd hit a bad patch in our career, as everybody does I suppose, and we thought we needed a manager to sort ourselves. So we started looking, and we found the boss man. He was impressed with our ring work, we were impressed with his brains and so forth. GK: I'd been scouting for a tag team for a couple of months and well, our interests converged. I'm confident that these two men are among the best tag team wrestlers in the world. BL: The best? It's been rumored backstage that you don't have what it takes to compete and survive in the IIWF, do you? SPOILER: I've yet to find anyone willing to say that to our faces. If anyone does doubt our abilty, then step in the ring. We'll be more than happy to prove it them. BL: There you have it... G.W.R. I hope I was everything you hoped I'd be. Next week I'm thinking I may interview Marty Warnett... [pop from the local crowd] That is... if he lives that long. So Tim, don't you go and interview him on that little segment of yours. I know how desperate you are for ratings, you even dragged me on there and even _I_ couldn't save that dismal little bit. Oh, and by the way... Nighty-night. [Cut back to ringside.] TD: Humph. Thanks a lot, Becky. SR: Truth hurts, huh, Dross? TD: Let's move on. It's time for tonight's big IIWF World Tag Team Championship match. Rising Sun Revolution put their unbeaten streak and their Championship belts on the line against the team who became the #1 contenders with their win over the Armed Forces last Saturday Night, former champions, the High Plains Drifters. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- IIWF WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Rising Sun Revolution vs. High Plains Drifters ---------------------------------------------- TD: Well, Steve, we saw the High Plains Drifters win against the Armed Forces last week for a shot at the title. SR: Yup... And tonight we're going to see the HPD take back the belts. TD: You realize that the High Plains Drifters have never beat the Rising Sun Revolution for those belts. SR: And Rising Sun Revolution never beat the High Plains Drifters. So what? TD: There's also the matter of the RSR being the only IIWF wrestlers with a perfect undefeated record. SR: Not for long... RA: Ladies and gentlemen, this next tag team match is scheduled for one fall and is for the IIWF World Tag Team Championship! [Big pop] Introducing first, being led to the ring by Josey Wales, and weighing in at a total combined weight of 502lbs, here are Pale and Easy Rider, The High Plains Drifters! [Pale, Easy, and Josey Wales walk out into the aisle to a large heel pop. Pale and Easy make motions of the belts being around their waists, and seem to be excited to get in the ring.] TD: Pale and Easy looking forward to getting this match started... They'd better not let that enthusiasm mess with their focus. SR: Don't worry, they won't. RA: Their opponents, weighing in at a total combined weight of 570lbs... They are the IIWF World Tag Team Champions, Ryudo "Tatsu" Kenjinata, Hiroshi "Daioni" Kasai, The Rising Sun Revolution! [The crowd goes absolutely wild for the champs, who step out into the aisle with their arms raised. A chant of "R-S-R!" can be heard over the theme from "Blade Runner" playing over the PA. Ryudo and Hiroshi walk to the ring, high-fiving fans as they do.] TD: There was only one other time that we had such popular champs, and that was the _last_ time RSR held the titles! SR: Huh? What do you mean? That the only people more popular that the Rising Sun Revolution are the Rising Sun Revolution? TD: Well, it sounds kind of silly if you put it like that... [The champs enter the ring and take the belts off, handing them to the ref. The ref walks around the ring, displaying the belt to the fans, and the HPD. Pale Rider stops him, and examines one of the belts. He takes hold of it, and holds it up to his waist. Pale and Easy nod in approval, and turn to the RSR to see what they think. Hiroshi seems a little upset, but Ryudo holds him back, shaking his head. The champs retreat to the corner, where they discuss their opening plan, and the ref takes the belt back from Pale. The bell rings, and Pale Rider leaves the ring, along with Hiroshi. Ryudo and Easy Rider step up to each other in the centre of the ring. Easy says a few things to Ryudo, but Ryudo just smirks and shakes his head.] TD: It's times like this I wish I could read lips. Look at the intensity here! SR: Enough talk... Let's see Easy give him a whuppin'! [Easy pushes Ryudo back, and Ryudo strikes back with a standing dropkick. Easy hits the mat to a big pop. Easy scrambles to his feet, where he is met by Ryudo. Ryudo throws him into the ropes, and attempts a thrust kick on the return, which is ducked by Easy. Easy rebounds with a firm Western Lariat, flooring the champ. Easy turns to the crowd and flexes, turning his back on Ryudo. Ryudo staggers to his feet, and just as Easy is flexing both arms, executes a back slide. the ref counts the pin... 1 - 2 - Kickout by Easy.] TD: We almost saw a win right there! Easy Rider _has_ to concentrate on the match at hand! Hang on -- I understand that the Harlequins have been sighted in the arena tonight... in the rafters? Can we get a camera up there? [Cut to the rafters of the arena. All four Harlequins -- Tragedy, Chaos, Melody and Comedy, sit watching the match, sitting on one of the soundproofing "mushrooms" that are suspended from the roof of the Hall. Melody and Comedy are sharing some popcorn, while Tragedy looks down at the ring intently, and Chaos picks his fingernails.] SR: What a bunch of goofballs. How the hell did they get up there? TD: I have no idea, Steve, but they seem very interested in this match. Let's get back to the ring. [Easy leaps back to his feet, as does Ryudo. Easy plants an open hand slap across Rydo's face, and the crowd gives a collective "oooh." Ryudo recoils a bit, but turns back with a huge right hand. Easy staggers back. On the apron, Hiroshi hollers something, and Ryudo turns, giving the thumbs up sign. Ryudo tags in Hiroshi then bounces Easy off the ropes. Hiroshi leaps over the top rope, hitting Easy square on the jaw with a solid dropkick as he does. Easy falls backward onto the mat, and Hiroshi soaks up the cheers. The cheers turn to a mild heel pop as Aaron the Caddy walks down the aisle. He makes his way to the ring and just stands there.] TD: What does he want here? SR: Well, since HPD beat the Forces for the number one contender spot, the Forces must be number two... He's scouting this match. [Aaron does just that, standing there, watching intently. Hiroshi picks up Easy Rider, and slings him into the ropes. Easy comes back, and Hiroshi hoists him up in a spinning powerslam, and drives him into the mat. The crowd cheers partially for the maneuver and partly because Mr. Psycho and Monster walk down the aisle, making a beeline for Aaron the Caddy. Domination begin to harass Aaron, but he holds his hands up innocently. The three men argue for a while, and are noticed by Hiroshi. Hiroshi goes over to the ropes and begins yelling in Japanese to Domination. Domination just sort of ignore him, until Ryudo joins his partner. The ref tries to get Ryudo to leave, but RSR is having none of it. Ryudo tells Domination to leave, But Domination continue to ignore them.] TD: Here's more evidence of the friction between Domination and RSR. SR: And if they're not careful, that friction is going to cost RSR the belts. [During the arguing, Easy crawls over to his corner and tags in Pale, who calmly walks up behind RSR and bash their heads together. Pale then thrust kicks Ryudo in the head, and turns his attentions to Hiroshi. Outside, Domination leave Aaron alone, and stand in the corner of RSR. Ryudo rolls out of the ring after he is kicked, right near Domination. In the ring, Hiroshi is sent for the ride, and as he comes back off the ropes, Pale kicks him in the gut. Hiroshi doubles over, and Pale hits a DDT. Pale goes for the cover... 1 - 2 - Kickout by Hiroshi. On the outside, Ryudo begins arguing with Domination. The fans cheer once more as the Alphabet Boys come down to the ring. Zed drags Abie by the head, and finally throws Abie at Aaron. Aaron hits the apron, and turns around. His eyes grow wide with fear as he realizes what's going on. In the ring, Pale Rider sets Hiroshi up on the top rope, then follows up.] TD: Things are getting chaotic here! Why are all these people out here? SR: That's not important. What's important is that Pale is about to try and superplex Hiroshi! Can he lift the big man? [Pale Rider tries for the Superplex, but it is blocked by Hiroshi. Hiroshi reverses, and executes a reverse superplex on Pale into the ring. Pale lands face first on the mat, and Hiroshi executes a splash from the ropes... The ref counts... 1 - 2 - Easy makes the save. Both members of the HPD then begin to attack Hiroshi. On the outside, the Armed Forces run down to help their manager. NavCom and DefCon attack Abie and Zed, while Ryudo still argues with Domination, who appear like they've had enough. Domination notices the brawl, and run to join in. As they do, Monster bumps into Ryudo, who ricochets off of him into the ring post. Ryudo smacks his head off the post and falls to the floor. In the ring, Hiroshi gets pounded by the HPD, but still gets to his feet. He begins blocking the shots, and then retaliates with shots of his own. Pale Rider is the first to go down, and Josey Wales goes to intercept him. By now, the Alphabet Boys, The Armed Forces, and Domination are all fighting each other, not choosing any sides. Josey hands Pale rider something, and Pale gets to his feet. Hiroshi is in the process of slamming Easy Rider to the canvas when Pale clocks him in the head. Hiroshi falls back with Easy on top of him. The ref, who has been distracted by the brawl outside, is spun around by Pale Rider, and he counts the pin... 1 - 2 - 3!! Ding! Ding! Huge Heel pop!] TD: What!? There was a foreign object used! And Ryudo is out cold on the outside! SR: Yes! Two time champions! The _real_ champions! RA: Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners, and _NEW_ IIWF Tag Team Champions, The High Plains Drifters!! [There is a huge heel pop as Josey Wales grabs the belts and enters the ring, giving them to Pale and Easy Rider. The brawl on the outside rages on, and the Jobber Justice Squad runs out to separate all parties. Pale and Easy stand groggily in the ring, holding their belts in the air. The teams on the outside are escorted backstage, and the HPD exit the ring, sporting their new titles. Hiroshi rolls from the ring, tending to his partner.] TD: This is a travesty! SR: This is great! I always thought the High Plains Drifters were the best champs we ever had! TD: It looks like Ryudo is going to need to be checked out. He's got the help of Hiroshi going up the aisle, but he really took a bump there. SR: Whine, whine... If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen. TD: Folks, I'm shocked... Rising Sun Revolution will have some very strong claims for a rematch here... And we have another fantastic match in prospect up next as the "Enigma" Tazeko Musashi, with his career on the line, teams up with Shinja Chow to face the Dark Disciples, and no doubt Don McQueen's been looking forward to this one. SR: I tell you, the Dark Disciples are going to tear through those sushi-eaters. McQueen's gonna get his revenge here tonight. TD: Before we get to the action, let's hear some last minute comments from the White Phoenix as he prepares for this match: [Cut to the White Phoenix in the backstage area, preparing for his match. He is wearing some sort of metal bands on his wrists that extend over each palm. He executes three quick crescent kicks, then turns to the camera, and speaks:] "I will make my comments brief, because I have to attend to some travel preparations. After Snow Brawl, I will be returning to China until the middle of January. I have recieved some... intriguing correspondence from an old friend. "However, I must speak to some who have opposed me. First, Kane and Wulf, you are foolish to have consistently attacked a friend of mine. The Phoenix is loyal to those who have earned his respect. We will reign victorious, and McQueen will break his hold on Musashi. This is not a matter of overconfidence, this is a matter of prophecy. "Steve Kowalski, I respect your ability and strength, but you are unwise to brag of your victory over me. It was the work of Casey James and his Blackheart Punch that defeated me. If you want me again, all you have to do is ask. I would gladly face you again. "Lastly, I must speak to Hakiro Matsuoko. I don't care any more if you are affiliated with Brian Lau, I don't care if you and Tiger Claw are friends or dire foes. You walk your own route now. But if your path crosses mine once more, if once again you spoil my chance at owning a championship which is rightly mine, if once more your interfere with my affairs... [Suddenly, the lights in the room fall dim. Chow's face takes on a much more violent look, and his eyes gleam brightly.] "...I will not refrain from releasing the full fury of my fire. Do not anger me again, Matsuoko, if you value your life. [He turns away from the camera.] "No more Mr. Nice Phoenix." [He quickly spins around, clapping the metal bands on his palms together. They form a spark, and he blows at it, forming a gout of fire which fills the screen. Static. Cut back to ringside.] TD: That's one determined fellow. Let's go up to Sparkplug for the official word. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Dark Disciples vs. "Enigma" Takezo Musashi & White Phoenix -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= [Sparkplug Lee steps into the ring, adjusting his bow tie, and glances nervously up at the Royal box.] RA: *Ahem* This tag team contest is scheduled for one fall, with a thirty minute time limit. Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by "Big Bucks" Don McQueen and Brian Lau, hailing from parts unknown and at a combined weight of 615lbs... here are Kane and Wulf, the Dark Disciples! [Druidic chanting starts up over the PA system, and Kane and Wulf appear in the aisle in their black cowled robes to a huge heel pop. Brian Lau and Don McQueen quickly follow them out, in deep conversation. Kane and Wulf enter the ring, and disrobe, as McQueen makes his way over to the cameraman. Wulf leans over the ropes and leers at the crowd, while Kane jumps to the second rope and raises his hands in the air. Don McQueen gets in the cameraman's face, holding up the Enigma's contract.] DM: MUSASHI! YOU LISTENING, BOY? YOU'RE OUTTA HERE TONIGHT! THESE TWO ARE GONNA PUT YOU OUTTA THE FED AND INTO THE DAMN HOSPITAL! TD: I don't know about the Disciples, but McQueen's definitely up for this one... SR: Trust me. Kane and Wulf are going to rip those two apart. RA: And their opponents... [Huge crowd pop!] at a combined weight of 431 pounds, here is the team of the "White Phoenix" Shinja Chow and the "Enigma" Takezo Musashi!! [The Enigma's mystical music starts up over the PA system, and both he and the White Phoenix race down to the ring to a huge crowd pop. The Disciples are waiting, however, and quickly go to work as they enter the ring, attacking the Enigma and Chow with kicks, punches and headbutts. They pound both men in the corners, then pull them into the center of the ring, and throw them over the top rope, before turning to pose for the crowd. Huge heel pop!] SR: What did I tell you, these guys are just too big and powerful for these Oriental midgets! They're gonna get squashed! [The Enigma and the Phoenix climb back onto the turnbuckle, and the Disciples turn around just in time to see them. They both move other with axehandles, but get caught by shoulderblocks to the midsection through the ropes. Both the Enigma and Chow grab the Disciple's heads, pull them over the top rope, and drop off the apron, and the Disciples are catapulted back into the ring! Big pop! Both men jump to the apron and climb to the top rope, and come down with two big double axehandle chops just as the Disciples are getting up! Another big pop! The Disciples quickly roll to the outside, and Wulf goes wild, slamming the canvas and screaming in frustration. McQueen quickly goes over to regroup his men, as the Phoenix and the Enigma return to their corner.] TD: And what a high-octane start we've had here! SR: This isn't Silverstone, Dross, it's the Royal Albert Hall. [The Disciples move back to their corner, and Kane rolls into the ring, while the Enigma waits on the other side of the ring. Both men slowly move to lock up, but the Enigma ducks under Kane's grapple at the last moment, and as he turns, catches him with an armdrag. Kane gets straight back up, and lunges again. Hiptoss by the Enigma. Kane gets up a third time, and a Japanese armdrag sends him straight back to the mat. He tries to get back up, but the Enigma pulls him back down with an armbar, and cinches it in tight.] TD: Kane was frustrated by that high speed string of takedowns. The Enigma's using his smaller size to his advantage here. SR: It won't last. All Kane has to do is hit him. [Kane manages to get back to a vertical base, and the Enigma continues to wind up his arm before pulling him to his corner. He kicks Kane in the stomach, and tags in Chow, while keeping hold of Kane's arm. Chow leaps to the top turnbuckle, and comes crashing down with a double axehandle across the arm that sends Kane to his knees. Chow pulls him back into the center ring, and takes him down with an armdrag, putting the knee across Kane's face. Kane kicks the mat and yells in rage. Wulf growls at Chow, who shakes his head.] TD: Good strategy here by Chow and the Enigma, keeping Kane down and trying to take some of his strength away. SR: It's not going to work. [McQueen slams the ring apron and yells at Kane to get up. He does, with a face-rake. Chow staggers backwards, and Kane scoops him up, and slams him to the mat. He picks Chow back up, and sends him for the ride into the ropes, and attempts a clothesline. Chow ducks under, and Kane puts his head down for a backdrop...] TD: Chow stops short, grabs the arm... SHOULDERBUSTER TO THE MAT! He picks Kane up, drags him back to their corner and makes the tag! [Chow wind's Kane's arm up again, and the Enigma comes of the top with another axehandle to the shoulder. Kane staggers back in pain, and the Enigma trips him, before cinching in a hammerlock. Holding the arm down, he pushes himself into a handstand, before dropping the knee across Kane's shoulder. Kane yells in pain, and the Enigma drops another knee. Big crowd pop! Kane pushes himself back onto a vertical base again, and backs the Enigma into the ropes. He tries an Irish whip... Chow reverses, and takes him straight back down with another armdrag!] TD: And the Enigma is completely outwrestling Kane here! Kane is NOT pleased at all! SR: Kane's not pleased? Look at McQueen and Lau! [Kane pushes himself back to his feet again, and the Enigma gives him an armwringer.... Kane doubles up, and the Enigma tries another Irish whip.] TD: Kane with a reversal... he holds on to the Enigma's arm... SHORT CLOTHESLINE! AND THAT ALMOST TOOK THE ENIGMA'S HEAD OFF! SR: Kane three-sixtied him! And look at him go to work! [Kane drops straight down on the Enigma with a chokehold, and the Enigma kicks out wildly, trying to escape. The referee lays on the five-count, but Kane ignores him. The referee warns him, and starts counting again, and this time Kane breaks at four. He stands back up, and rubs his arm, glaring at Chow. The Enigma struggles back to his feet, and a kick from Kane doubles him over. Kane knocks him back to the canvas with a boot to the head, and follows up with an elbowdrop to the throat.] TD: The Enigma's in trouble here now.... SR: I told you. All Kane had to do was get his hands on him. [Kane drags the Enigma to his feet by his hair, and starts choking him over the top rope, causing McQueen to get in his face, waving the contract at him. Kane breaks the hold at the referee's count, and hurls him to the outside, and the official immediately drags Kane backwards for another warning.] TD: Oh no.... SR: Oh yes... [Wulf drops down off the apron, and picks the Enigma up, slamming him down hard on the concrete. Big heel pop! Chow gets straight into the ring, trying to turn the official's attention to Wulf on the outside, but Kane gets involved, and the referee forces the Phoenix back to his corner. Meanwhile, and the outside, Wulf bowls the Enigma into the ringsteps...] TD: The official needs to pay more attention to what's happening on the outside here.... SR: Hey, he can't help it if Chow tries to get involved. He's only trying to do his job. [Wulf moves back to his corner just as the referee turns around, and Kane leaps out of the ring. Kane slams the Enigma's head into the ringsteps, and then rolls him back into the ring. McQueen and Lau start to applaud. Kane whips the Enigma into their corner, and then runs over and punches Shinja Chow off the ring apron. The referee warns him again, and Wulf takes the opportunity to wrap the tag rope around the Enigma's throat.] SR: Now THIS is good teamwork... TD: Blatant double-teaming you mean. SR: What's the difference? TD: [sighs] [Kane moves back into his corner, and starts pounding away on the Enigma with forearms and headbutts. Kane tags in Wulf, and the Enigma drops to the canvas.] SR: Uh-oh. That's it. NOW we're gonna see some blood flying. This guy is dangerous. [Wulf picks the Enigma up, and lifts him into the air with a double handed chokehold. The Enigma kicks around, but can't break out. The referee lays on the warning count, and Wulf carries him over to a neutral corner and throws him into the turnbuckles... He follows up with an Irish whip with enough force to send the Enigma back out of the corner, and Wulf catches him around the throat, and drives him into the canvas with a chokeslam. Big heel pop! Wulf turns around to yell at Shinja Chow, who is stopped from entering the ring by the official.] TD: You know, I haven't seen a single pin attempt from the Disciples yet... I think they're just out to injure the Enigma. SR: Yup. [Wulf turns back to the Enigma, picks him to his feet and whips him into the ropes, he tries a clothesline, the Enigma ducks under, Wulf turns, and gets caught by a spinwheel kick.] TD: Here's a chance for the Enigma to make the tag. [Wulf rolls to his corner and tags in Kane, who darts into the ring and nails the Enigma with a huge axehandle inches away from Chow... Chow stomps the mat in frustration. Kane drags the Enigma back into the center of the ring, grins at the Phoenix, and nails him with a vicious DDT. Big heel pop! Kane drops over him with a cover - 1 - 2 - kickout by the Enigma. Kane grins, and hurls the Enigma back into his corner, and tag's Wulf back in. Kane and Wulf whip the Enigma into the ropes... and nail a double clothesline that levels the Enigma. Kane exits, and Wulf charges over and elbows Chow off the ring apron again.] TD: And the Disciples are really taking control now... it doesn't look good for the Enigma... the official's showing a lot of leniency to the Disciples here.... SR: Musushi should give up now before he gets really hurt. TD: Not a chance. His IIWF career's on the line here. He's not just going to quit. [Wulf drags the Enigma back to his feet, and the Enigma kicks him in the stomach. Another kick... another... and Wulf slams him back to the canvas with an axehandle. Irish whip by Wulf into the corner, and he follows up with a big avalanche!] TD: Oh no... he's not going to... SR: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I TOLD you we'd see some blood! [Wulf starts gnawing away at the Enigma's forehead while he's in the corner, and the Enigma starts thrashing around. The referee lays on yet another warning count, and when Wulf doesn't respond, he finally gets physically involved, dragging Wulf away from Tazeko Musashi. Musashi drops to the canvas, drawing a few screams from the crowd...] TD: And Musashi is cut wide open here... blood's pouring down his face... Chow really has to do something soon... the Enigma's not been able to make the tag... so Chow MUST start fighting fire with fire. [Wulf drags the Enigma back to his feet, and throws the Enigma back into his corner, and tags in Kane. Kane pulls chow into the center of the ring, and rakes his injured face, causing him to double up in pain. Kane hooks the Enigma up... piledriver! A cover - 1 - 2 - Kane pulls the Enigma's shoulders up! Huge heel pop!] TD: Oh, come on! SR: Obviously McQueen wants the score settled for good here. TD: There's no need at all for this! If Chow doesn't get involved soon, the referee will be thinking of stopping the match... [Kane scoops the Enigma up and slams him hard to the canvas... he moves to the corner and starts to climb the ropes... Chow starts stamping on the mat, trying to rouse the Enigma... and the crowd starts to join in... the Enigma gets to his knees...] TD: Kane's almost at the top rope... if the Enigma's going to make a revival, it better be now! [Kane reaches the top, and the Enigma gets to his feet and charges the corner, nailing Kane with a punch that makes him lose his footing, and fall into a seriously uncomfortable position. Huge crowd pop!] SR: Oh no... no no no! [Musashi starts climbing the turnbuckles after him, and slugs Kane in the head a few times... he locks him into a facelock.] TD: Watch out! DDT OFF THE TOP ROPE! AND THAT BOUGHT THE ENIGMA SOME TIME! [Neither man stirs. The referee starts counting both men down... the Phoenix starts urging the crowd to get behind the Enigma... the count reaches five, and both men start getting up at the same time.] TD: Whose going to make it up first? SR: Oh yes. It's gonna be Kane! It's gonna be Kane! [Kane stumbles up to his feet, shaking his head... the Enigma gets to his knees... Kane looks other as the Enigma rises up, and goes for an axehandle. And the Enigma with a small package out of nowhere! The referee's in position - 1 - 2 - kickout by Kane! Kane pulls the Enigma up... the Enigma nails him in the stomach... and again... the Enigma runs to the ropes... lariat floors Kane! And he dives for the tag!] TD: And he makes it! Chow vaults the ropes and hits the ring like a house on fire! [Kane gets to his feet and Chow hits him with a series of chops and roundhouse kicks. Kane covers his head, Chow kicks him in the stomach, Kane doubles over and Chow floors him with an axe kick! In comes Wulf, Chow nails him with a lariat! Kane staggers back to his feet, another lariat! Wulf up again, Chow dropkicks him and sends him to the outside! He turns back to Kane, Kane with a haymaker, Chow ducks, atomic drop followed by a Dragon Suplex! The referee counts - 1 - 2 - Kane kicks out but just barely!] SR: Oh my God! Get Wulf back in the ring! [Chow leaps to the second turnbuckle and waits... Kane staggers to his feet and turns around... and a flying clothesline by the White Phoenix levels him! Chow climbing up the ropes again... and a beautiful moonsault splash nails Kane! The referee counts again - 1 - 2 - and Wulf gets back into the ring and breaks the count with an axehandle to Chow's back! The Enigma charges back into the ring with a second wind, and floors Wulf with a spinning leg lariat!] TD: The referee's losing control rapidly here... we've got a four-way going! [The Enigma backs Wulf into the corner and starts laying into him with a series of punches and kicks. Shinja Chow picks Kane up and runs him towards the ropes, throwing him out over the top. He quickly follows Kane to the outside. The Enigma whips Wulf into the ropes and connects with a perfectly-timed Frankensteiner! On the outside, Chow follows Kane around the ring, Brain Lau and Don McQueen try to scramble out of the way. Chow whips Kane into the guard railings! Big crowd pop! There is a commotion at the head of the aisle.] TD: All Hell's breaking loose at ringside now... someones making their way to ringside! [In the ring, the Enigma nails Wulf with a bulldog as Shinja Chow rolls back into the ring. Both men pick Wulf up, send him into the ropes and hit him with a double superkick! Huge crowd pop!] TD: Hakiro Matsuoko? Doesn't this guy have anything better to do? [The Enigma signals for the Starsault press just as Hakiro Matsuoko hits ringside. The Enigma reaches the top rope as Hakiro leaps to the opposite turnbuckle. The referee spots him, and Hakiro nails the White Phoenix from behind with a double axehandle chop! Huge heel pop! The Enigma hits Wulf with the Starsault Press, and the referee waves for the bell.] SR: What's the decision here? TD: I think the Disciples may have been disqualified. The referee saw Hakiro's attack on Chow... [The brawl continues in the ring. Wulf rolls to the outside, Hakiro repeatedly punches Chow from on top of him. The Enigma sees him and runs over, and the Angel of the Sun beats a hasty retreat, only to be met by an irate Tiger Claw in the aisle, and both men start brawling their way back to the dressing rooms to a big crowd pop. Don McQueen is arguing with Brian Lau on the outside.] RA: Here are your winners as the result of a disqualification: the team of the "White Phoenix" Shinja Chow and the "Enigma" Tazeeeeekooooooo Musaaaaasssshiiiiiii! [Huge crowd pop! The White Phoenix lifts the bloodied Enigma's hand in the air, and on the outside, Brian Lau begins shouting at Hakiro Matsuoko who walks away without a word. Kane and Wulf slam the canvas, and react angrily... Don McQueen makes his way to the timekeeper's table, but is cut off by the Enigma and Shinja Chow... McQueen starts to badmouth the Enigma... and he responds with a kick to McQueen's midsection, and snatches his contract to McQueen off him! Huge crowd pop! The Enigma and the White Phoenix return to the ring, and the Enigma rips the contract up and throws it into the air! The crowd go crazy! The Enigma's Oriental music starts up over the PA system, and McQueen and the Dark Disciples have to be bodily dragged back to the dressing room area by security.] TD: What an incredible match that was, folks. Truth and justice has won out! Folks, we're running behind schedule, so without any further ado, let's go live to the offices of the IIWF President, who has some important announcements concerning IIWF Snow Brawl, which is now only two weeks away! [Cut to split-screen; on the left, the broadcast table; on the right, IIWF President Daniel Spreadbury seated at his desk.] TD: Good evening, Mr. President! DS: Good evening, gentlemen. It's good to be here as always. Before I talk about Snow Brawl, I have some distressing news to report. Due to conflicting interests in contractual details concerning other wrestling organisations, the IIWF contracts of "Blitz Lightning" Bobby Lincoln, and his brother and tag team partner, Todd Franklin, have been terminated at the discretion of the wrestlers concerned. It has been plain since day one that neither Lincoln nor Franklin was happy in the IIWF, and the front office have been unable to persuade them that these differences of opinion can be worked out. It is always a shame to lose world-class talent, but the Universal Powers were also possessed of an attitude that made them not only controversial, but also difficult to work with. I don't doubt that they will be missed by some fans here in the IIWF. TD: Well, I have been quite public in my expressions of distaste at the manner in which the Universal Powers have threatened you with physical violence, President Dan. DS: [with a smile] All part and parcel of the job, Tim. I take the flak every day, if not from the wrestlers or the managers then from the Board of Directors. It's having grace under fire that counts, and I am only sorry that the Universal Powers and the IIWF could not work out their differences. In any case, let us move on. I am here tonight to announce the title matches at the IIWF's next pay-per-view spectacular, which will originate from a converted hangar on a US Air Force in Alaska in just two weeks' time. Snow Brawl is shaping up to be a huge event, and the ink is drying on the contracts for the four championship matches. The main event was scheduled to pit IIWF World Heavyweight Champion Dan Kauffman against Deathbringer, but following the events of tonight, which has seen the return of Chris Quigley to the IIWF, I am forced to accept that Quigley, who was #1 contender for the title before he took leave of the IIWF, has a very strong claim to the title. Therefore, I will meet with Quigley to discuss two possibilities; either he will meet Deathbringer before Snow Brawl, and the winner of that match will get the shot at Kauffman, or he will be guaranteed entry in the battle royal at the end of the Lethal Lottery, so that he has a chance of earning the first shot at the champion after Snow Brawl. TD: This all seems a bit sudden, President Dan. DS: I have held an emergency conference with members of the Special Concerns Committee, and the Vice-President, and these solutions seem to represent the fairest way to allow Quigley back into the title picture. In the same meeting, it was decided that the IIWF Cruiserweight Champion, Hakiro Matsuoko, will defend his title not against the White Phoenix, as originally planned, but against Tiger Claw. This is partly due to the fact that Shinja Chow approached us earlier in the week about being allowed a sabbatical after Snow Brawl in order to return to China, and it was felt that whomever has the chance of winning such a prestigious title should remain in active competition to defend it. Brian Lau has also been lobbying me to allow Claw a shot at Matsuoko, and having spoken with Hakiro earlier today, this seemed like a fantastic match. TD: Tiger Claw and Hakiro Matsuoko met at Ring Wars back in June, of course. DS: And it was a tremendous match. We have high hopes for the return encounter. As we have just seen, the IIWF World Tag Team Championships changed hands in a somewhat controversial fashion, and I believe that Rising Sun Revolution should be given a rematch at the earliest opportunity, which is Snow Brawl. Thus the High Plains Drifters will face Rising Sun Revolution in Alaska. Finally, the IIWF Intercontinental Champion, Billy Shakespeare, will defend his title against "Painbringer" Billy Sexton, assuming of course that Shakespeare's injuries have recovered sufficiently to allow him to wrestle at Snow Brawl. If he is unable to compete, Sexton will be awarded the title by default. TD: Well, that should put to rest any whisperings of conspiracy in the front office. DS: There was never any question, Tim. I will be meeting with Mr. Sexton again this week to discuss his grievances, although I hope this title shot will do something to redress the balance. TD: I'm sure it will, Mr. President. Any further news on the Lethal Lottery? DS: Yes, Tim. As will have been noticed, the turnover in talent is higher than usual at this time, due to the fact that many contracts are coming up for renewal. As a result, a few of the names announced for the Lottery have moved on from the IIWF. Therefore, I will now give a complete run-down of all the wrestlers currently entered into the draw: Steve "the Fury" Kowalski; Venusian Death Cell; Lord Byron; Otto "the Butcher" Verhoeven; Subway Psycho; Onslaught; Mad Dog Watkins; Casey "Blackheart" James; The Sandman; Marty Warnett; Mr. Damage; Creed; Harlequin Tragedy; Harlequin Chaos; "Superstar" Stud Stetson; and "Lone Wolf" Brody Thunder. That's sixteen, and I am able to announce two more entrants tonight: "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley and the White Phoenix. The remaining six entrants will be announced over the course of this week. TD: That reads like a veritable "who's who" in the IIWF, Mr. President. DS: Indeed it does. We're in for a tremendous night of action. Don't forget that there will also be a huge tag team battle royal on the Free For All to determine #1 contenders to the champions after Snow Brawl, a Valet Match between Nurse Heidi and Mistress Sasha, and a "Winner Gets Contract" match between J.P. Steele and the "Real Deal" Luke Steele. All in all, IIWF Snow Brawl is shaping up to be one of the most exciting pay-per-view events of all time. TD: Indeed it is. Thanks very much for your time, Mr. President. DS: That's my pleasure. Enjoy the rest of the show. Goodnight, gentlemen. [Cut back to normal shot of ringside.] TD: IIWF Snow Brawl is shaping up to be a tremendous event, folks. Call your local cable operator now to ensure you don't miss out on any of the action. Two men who will feature very strongly in Snow Brawl are the men we are about to see in action: Lord Byron and Marty Warnett. These two have been at each others' throats since Ring Wars II, when Byron made his IIWF debut, and perhaps in tonight's main event, here in the Royal Albert Hall, on their home turf, we will see them settle their differences. Let's go up to Sparkplug Lee to get the introductions. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- PURE SCIENCE MATCH: -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Marty Warnett vs. Lord Byron ---------------------------- [Sparkplug Lee takes to the ring once more.] RA: Your Royal highness, my lords, ladies and gentlemen. It's time for tonight's main event! [Big pop!] The following Pure Science Match is scheduled for one fall, and it will have a thirty minute time limit. The rules are as follows: any breach of the accepted rules, including use of a closed fist, using the ropes and so on, will result in an instant disqualification. The loser of the match will have to acknowledge to the entire crowd that the winner is the better athlete. Introducing the combatants: first, hailing from Lancashire, England, weighing in at 275lbs, and accompanied to the ring by the Lady DeWinter, here is Lord Byron! [Big heel pop as the Intermezzo from Sibelius' "Karelia" Suite starts up over the PA, and Byron walks arm-in-arm with DeWinter down to the ring.] SR: You're looking at the victor right here, Dross. There's no way Byron can be beaten in a purely scientific match. TD: We'll see about that, Steve. We've seen in the past that Warnett can mix it up in any number of styles, and just recently he's also demonstrated that he's pretty good at pulling rabbits out of his hat. SR: Tonight the only thing he's going to be pulling out of his hat is his head, after Byron rams it there. TD: Er... yes, Steve. SR: Shut up. It's been a long day. TD: Hasn't it just. RA: And introducing his opponent: weighing 245lbs, and hailing from Cardiff, Wales, here is the IIWF's party animal: Maaaarty Waaarnett! [Huge pop as "Cold Gin" starts up over the PA, and Warnett appears at the head of the aisle, wearing special Union flag tights, although he is also still wearing a heavy knee brace. He raises his arms to the appreciative hometown crowd, and jogs down to the ring, occasionally getting mobbed by his overzealous groupies. He climbs the ringsteps and enters the ring, taking the house microphone from Sparkplug Lee.] MW: Thankyou! It's great to be here in London, back on home soil! But before I teach this blue-blooded baboon the wrestling lesson of his life... [Huge pop! DeWinter holds Byron back.] SR: Where does Warnett get off saying things like that, Dross?! MW: ...I'd like to bring out my little surprise. This is a Pure Science match, Lord Byron. This is a match in which there can be no cheating of any sort. So I thought I'd take a few extra precautions. I lobbied the front office for a special guest referee for this match tonight, and I've got a man who will call this straight down the middle, a man whom we can all trust. Your Royal Highness, ladies and gentlemen, will you please welcome tonight's special guest referee... IIWF Vice-President Steve Owens! [Byron kicks the ropes in frustration as IIWF VP Steve Owens jogs down the aisle in traditional referee attire. He waves to the crowd, before jumping into the ring.] TD: What a turn-up for the books! Mind you, with his bad back, Owens had better be careful in there, Steve. SR: This is ridiculous! Byron is getting screwed right here! TD: Certainly not, Steve. The Vice-President is a completely trustworthy individual. This should be a fantastic match! [Owens signals for the bell, and Byron and Warnett take centre ring. They jaw at one another, Byron sneering in contempt at his opponent. Warnett appears to be frustrated by Byron's words, and winds up to punch him. The crowd roars their warning. Warnett pauses, his fist drawn back.] TD: Marty had better remember -- a breach of the rules like a closed fist will result in an instant disqualification! [Warnett smiles, and looks at Byron, who has a smug grin on his face. He taunts Warnett, pointing at his chin, and Warnett suddenly fires out with a huge slap that staggers Byron.] SR: Disqualify him, ref! TD: Why? That was an open fist, Steve. Completely legal. SR: I can't believe this. [Warnett performs a quick go-behind on Byron, then switches to a hammerlock. Byron seems frustrated, and tries to grab Warnett with his free arm. He eventually reverses the hammerlock, and Warnett grabs the ropes. Owens calls for the break, and Byron obliges. Byron sneers at Warnett, making a sarcastic bow, and Warnett flies across the ring at his opponent, nearly taking his head off with a clothesline. Warnett drops on Byron and locks on a reverse chinlock, restraining his legs with a bodyscissors. However, the combination has the effect of pinning Warnett's own shoulders to the mat, and Owens makes the count - 1 - 2 - Warnett realises what is happening, and gets his shoulders out of the way.] TD: Marty needs to be careful about this. Owens will call this match right down the middle. SR: Why's Walnut arguing with the official?! He ought to be concentrating on Byron. TD: Indeed -- from behind! Byron locks on a chickenwing! Marty could be in trouble right here! [Warnett forces himself into the corner, Byron hanging on with the chickenwing, and uses his feet to climb the turnbuckles, reducing Byron's leverage. Marty flips over Byron off the top buckle, lands on his feet, and hooks Byron up for a German suplex! Big pop! Owens again makes the count - 1 - 2 - Byron kicks out! There is a big heel pop as a stretcher is wheeled down to ringside by a team of four paramedics.] TD: What's the meaning of this?! SR: Another little reminder from "Superstar" Stud Stetson, as if the brace on his knee wasn't enough. [Warnett argues with Owens, asking him to order the paramedics away, but the discussion reaches no conclusion as Byron grabs Warnett from behind, and peppers him with a flurry of European uppercuts, backing him into the corner. Lady DeWinter leaps up onto the apron, and Owens attempts to force her back to the arena floor. Meanwhile, in the corner, Byron begins working over Marty's knee with kicks and punches. Big heel pop!] TD: The Vice-President is showing his inexperience at officiating right here. He shouldn't be distracted by the Lady DeWinter. SR: Tough not to be though, isn't it, Dross? There's more talent around the rings than inside it these days. TD: Please, Steve, less of the sexist comments. [Just as Owens forces DeWinter back down to the arena floor, Byron snapmares Marty out into the ring before grapevining his weakened knee. Warnett screams out in pain, and begins inching towards the ropes. Byron does his best to drag Marty back into the centre of the ring, but after an excruciating minute or so, Warnett finally grabs the ropes, forcing Byron to break the hold. Again, as Warnett tries to stand, DeWinter leaps to the apron, distracting the referee while Byron kicks Warnett's knee out from under him, sending him through 360 degrees. Big heel pop! The referee turns, and interrogates Byron, but the arrogant athlete pleads innocence. Warnett rolls to the outside to collect his thoughts while Byron argues with the official, and DeWinter casually wanders around the ring until she is on the same side as Warnett. Checking that Owens' back is turned, she kicks Warnett in the knee with her high-heeled shoe, and Warnett tumbles to the floor. Big heel pop!] TD: Come on, this is ridiculous! SR: No, it's great, Dross. This Vice-President is just like all the other suits -- he doesn't have a clue about officiating! TD: That's three times Byron has broken the rules in this contest, and he's not been caught once. Warnett's luck had better change, or that knee of his could be seriously injured. [Warnett pulls himself back into the ring on the count of five, and Byron immediately goes back to the knee, yanking it and stretching the ligaments with a variety of quick switch holds from which Marty fights to escape. Byron drags Warnett into the centre of the ring and points out to the crowd, laughing and taunting them, before wrapping Warnett's legs up in a figure four leglock! Huge heel pop!] TD: Byron doesn't just want to beat Warnett -- he wants to humiliate him! That's Warnett's patented finisher right there! SR: A figure four as a finisher?! All I can say is that Warnett must think he's a master of that hold if he believes that will put an athlete like Byron away. The figure four hasn't got anything on the Aristoclutch. I think Byron's making a mistake trying to embarrass Warnett here -- he should go for the kill. TD: I couldn't agree more. Give Warnett an inch, and he'll take a mile. [Warnett struggles in the leglock, attempting to turn Byron over. The first two attempts fail, and Warnett ends up grimacing in pain once more. Then the crowd start getting behind him, chanting "Go Marty Go! Go Marty Go!" and Warnett seems to draw energy from them. DeWinter beats the apron in frustration, which only serves to make the chant louder. Warnett finally turns Byron over, reversing the effects of the hold. Byron yells out in pain.] TD: There you go! Warnett has The End locked on! Byron's in big trouble now! SR: Come on, Byron! Get out of that hold! [A minute goes by, and Byron refuses to submit. The crowd continue to chant, "Go Marty Go!" while DeWinter is almost in paroxysms of anger on the outside. She goes round to the side of the ring to which Warnett is nearest, and begins taunting him. He simply smiles, and yanks a little more leverage on the leglock. DeWinter appears to be getting more and more frustrated, until she finally pulls one of her shoes off, and smacks Warnett around the head with it, in full view of the referee! Ding! Ding! Ding!] SR: No! No! I told you, Dross, a million times! These women have no place at ringside! I can't believe it! [Owens immediately throws the shoe out of the ring, and attempts to keep Byron away from the stunned Warnett, but the furious athlete struggles to his feet, and stomps away on Warnett, despite having a pronounced limp. There is a big pop as the Harlequins run down the aisle and storm the ring, pulling Byron away from Warnett, and holding him in one corner.] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner, as the result of a disqualification: Marty Warnett! [The crowd erupts with a huge pop as Owens helps Warnett to his feet. Marty holds his head, but raises his free arm. Cameras flash all over the Hall.] RA: As you know, the loser must acknowledge the winner as the superior athlete. [Even bigger pop as the ring announcer goes to the corner where Byron is being held by the Harlequins, and holds it in front of Byron's face. The Lord spits in disgust, and Warnett begins working up the crowd, starting a "Loser! Loser!" chant.] SR: Give me a break! Byron didn't lose this match! It was that hussy he brings to ringside. TD: Please, Steve, don't be so offensive. Byron chooses to have DeWinter at ringside, and for the most part it proves to be an effective -- if illegal -- strategy, but he's going to have to control her temper. This crowd is loving every moment of this! [The crowd finally settles as Byron prepares to speak.] LB: Mr. Warnett -- you have beaten me tonight. The better man won. [Huge pop! Byron spits in disgust, and frees himself from the grasp of the Harlequins, immediately heading up the aisle, ignoring the appeals of Lady DeWinter. Warnett points at the stretcher crew on the outside, and the Harlequins shoo them up the aisle while Marty celebrates in the ring. A frame is lowered above the ring covered in fireworks which erupt into a shower of flame as "Cold Gin" starts up over the PA once more! Huge pop! Cut to the announcers' table.] TD: Wow! This crowd really loves Marty Warnett! SR: I don't. TD: Perhaps not. We're right out of time here for tonight, folks, but what a show it's been. Next week, we'll be coming live from Berlin, Germany, in which the main event will see Otto "the Butcher" Verhoeven face the Subway Psycho one on one. Worth the price of admission alone! I'll be back with you on Tuesday with another look "Inside the IIWF", and there'll be more action this Wednesday in the War Room, with the highlights of action from the IIWF's next show, which will originate from the Piazza Dome in Rome. Until then, this is Tim Dross, for "Soundbite" Steve Roberts, saying: so long, everybody! [Cut back the ring, where Warnett continues to celebrate his victory amidst the fireworks. Pan up past the tiers of cheering fans in the Royal Albert Hall. Fade.] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Steve Owens | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | sowens@admin.presby.edu | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | IIWFadmin@aol.com | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+