##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== W + E + D + N + E + S + D + A + Y W + A + R R + O + O + M ----------------------------------------------- + 15 January 1997 + [Fade through to a darkened studio: two figures sit at opposite ends of a curved desk, behind which a large video wall, made up of a number of individual television screens, fades into life, each screen showing highlights from a different recent IIWF match. The studio lights rise, and the figures are revealed to be announcers Tim Dross and Becky LaRue. Dross looks up from his papers and speaks:] TD: Good evening, fans, and welcome to another edition of IIWF Wednesday War Room! I'm Tim Dross, and beside me as always is my broadcast colleague, the beautiful Becky LaRue. What an incredible night of action it was in the IIWF Coliseum here in Portland, Oregon, and over the next hour we'll be running down all the results and showing you some highlights. BL: The show won't be too long, then. TD: What's that supposed to mean, Becky? BL: There weren't many highlights, Timmy. TD: Oh, that's really not true. [The video wall shows footage of Ronnie Paris and Mad Dog Watkins in a series of pinfall attempts. Paris hooks Watkins' legs, then Watkins rolls over backwards and kneels on Paris' shoulders. Paris counters, hooking Watkins' shoulders with his legs and forcing him back onto the mat. The exchange continues as Tim Dross speaks:] TD: One of the finest technical matches in IIWF history went down in the Coliseum earlier this evening, as the courageous Ronnie Paris went up against Mad Dog Watkins in a one-hour Iron Man match. Both men proved themselves to be tremendous athletes in their last encounter, which lasted for more than thirty minutes, but who came out on top in this huge match? BL: Certainly not the fans. They were bored stiff. [Cut to footage of Billy Shakespeare brawling with Casey James in the ring while Brody Thunder brawls with Tiger Claw on the outside.] TD: Both Brody Thunder and his employer, Billy Shakespeare, had bones to pick with the Syndicate, and tonight they met in the ring in tag team action. [Cut to footage of "Badboy" Randy Acorn walking to the ring, a look of determination on his face.] TD: Gone were the theatrics, gone were the disguises as the "Badboy" Randy Acorn walked to the ring tonight for his match with the American Patriot. Acorn had put his IIWF career on the line in this match -- will he be looking for a new job tomorrow? BL: I sure hope so. [Cut to footage of G.W.R. and the Armed Forces brawling in the ring.] TD: No countouts, no disqualification, and the winner gets bragging rights. Those were the stipulations demanded by G.W.R. in order to finally settle their feud with the Armed Forces. That went down tonight, folks, and we'll have the details later on. [Cut to footage of the Alphabet Boys in ringside seats, cheering on Rising Sun Revolution as they battle the Hangmen.] TD: They say, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. And that seems to be what Rising Sun Revolution have done. Ryudu and Hiroshi returned to action in the IIWF tonight, facing the Hangmen, and brought the Alphabet Boys to ringside with them. BL: With friends like them, who needs enemies... [Cut to footage of Nightwing locking up collar and elbow with Harlequin Chaos, who is cheered on from the outside by Harlequin Tragedy.] TD: How did Harlequin Chaos cope in the squared circle without the calming influence of Harlequin Melody? BL: He'll be awful. As always. TD: In the Coliseum this evening were "Soundbite" Steve Roberts and Larry Morton. Gentlemen, are you there? [Tim and Becky turn to face the video wall, on which appear Morton and Roberts, standing in the locker room area of the IIWF Coliseum.] LM: Yes, we're here, Tim. SR: Worse luck. LM: It's been a fabulous night of wrestling action here in the Coliseum, and we'll be bringing you details of some of the highlights in the course of the next hour. SR: Speak for yourself. I'm going to the bar. [Roberts walks out of shot.] LM: Er... Well, I'm awaiting the presence of the Subway Psycho, who has agreed to give us a few words tonight concerning his big Third Rail Match this Saturday night against Otto Verhoeven, and I'll be bringing you that interview later in the hour. For now, back to you, Tim and Becky. [The IIWF logo fades onto the video wall as Tim and Becky turn back to face the cameras.] BL: Good to see that Steve's in as good a mood as ever. TD: Quite. Okay, folks, without any further ado, let's get to the recap of tonight's action, starting with the man who made such an impact on the IIWF last Saturday Night: Creed. [The video wall displays still images of the wrestlers and their stats:] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Creed vs. "Nifty" Ned Norton 275lbs, 6'4" 245lbs, 6'1" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Creed was a real one-man gang on Saturday Night, seemingly mixing it up with just about every wrestler in the IIWF. In comparison, tonight's match was little more than a joke for the big Corporation cornerstone. With the "CEO" Jack Montgomery looking on, Creed displayed his superb athleticism against Norton, who looked completely unprepared for the assault he had to face. Creed hit some impressive spinwheel kicks, performed his devastating power slam, and completely dominated from bell to bell. The end came when he hit a furious volley of left hands, and a huge left-handed chokeslam, followed by the Goodnight, Farewell and Amen -- Creed's incredible top-rope flying powerbomb. This man will go far in the IIWF, Becky. BL: He certainly will... He's taken the fight to everybody that he's faced, and the only reason he isn't 6-0 after tonight is because other wrestlers take it upon themselves to interfere in his matches. After his displays on Saturday, and now tonight, they'll think twice before writing checks their bodies can't cash. TD: Interestingly, Creed received quite an ovation in the Coliseum tonight. It seems that the fans are really warming to Creed's no nonsense attitude. After his victory, he stood in the middle of the ring and waved his left glove at the entrance, seemingly daring anyone from the locker room to come out and step into the ring with him. Needless to say, nobody obliged him, but the fans began chanting Creed's name, and Montgomery seemed pleased at the reaction. BL: That could be a big mistake, Timmy. The last thing Creed needs to start doing is worry about the reaction of those idiot fans. TD: We still don't know who has signed Quake's open contract for Saturday Night, and there were no indications in the Coliseum tonight. I guess we're just going to have to wait until Saturday. BL: [sarcastic] How will we cope?! [WINNER: Creed by pinfall in 4:14.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= PAIN INC. vs. HIGH PLAINS DRIFTERS Morningstar & Hellraiser Pale Rider & Easy Rider comb. 585lbs comb. 502lbs =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: It seems that these two teams are coming in for a lot of flak at the moment. Pain Inc. have recently returned from Indonesia and are trying to catapult themselves into the title picture, but have got bogged down in a war of words with the Players' Club and former allies, the Armed Forces. Meanwhile, the Drifters are working their way towards another title shot, but have been having their problems with the Hangmen. BL: I have a problem with those guys, too. I don't think black really suits them. TD: They're Hangmen, Becky. Hangmen wear black. BL: Black's a very depressing colour, Timmy. TD: Well, what do you suggest? That they switch their executioners' outfits for Hawaiian shirts and Bermuda shorts?! BL: Hmm... TD: But we digress. It was Pain Inc. who came up short in this match, thanks to IIWF World Heavyweight Champion Dan Kauffman. Morningstar and Hellraiser certainly seem to have benefitted from their training, as they once again came out very focused and determined. They weathered an early storm from the Drifters and really took it to them in the later stages of the match, but things took a turn for the worse when the three members of the Players' Club sauntered down to ringside. Let's go over to Larry for the details: [Tim and Becky turn to face the video wall, on which appears Larry Morton, still situated in the locker room area.] LM: Thanks, Tim. Dan Kauffman, Danny Dynamite and Michael Reyna came down to the ring during this match, and while Dynamite and Reyna jawed with Mr. Mic and Hades, Kauffman decided to get in Pain Inc's faces. Morningstar was on the apron, and he was dragged to the floor by the IIWF Champion, prompting a brawl to erupt on the outside. The referee tried to break up the brawl between Kauffman and Morningstar, and while his back was turned, Pale Rider waffled Hellraiser with a steel chair, and covered him. The referee turned and made the count, and the Drifters made a quick exit, walking out with a victory. Amazingly, Hellraiser got up almost straight after being pinned, and went after the Players' Club on the outside. The upshot of all this is that Pain Inc. tore up their locker room here backstage, and have demanded that one of their number is allowed to face Dan Kauffman in singles action on Saturday Night. I have no idea whether that match will be signed, but I'll keep you posted on any further developments. [The IIWF logo fades back onto the video wall as Tim and Becky turn back to the cameras once more.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= "Badboy" Randy Acorn vs. American Patriot 227lbs, 6'3" 285lbs, 6'11" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: The fortunes of the "Badboy" Randy Acorn have taken a real downturn in his latest tenure in the IIWF. Some say that Acorn is washed out, and some say that he has tried to do too much, too soon by immediately pitching himself back into the title picture. Acorn seemed to be believing this speculation himself, and thus set himself an ultimatum. He contacted the IIWF front office on Monday morning and asked that an extra clause be written into his contract for this match -- if he loses, he will leave the IIWF. However, he went into a match against the Patriot, who has been struggling with balancing his commitments outside the IIWF and thus hasn't been fully effective since joining the ranks back in December. Acorn was single-minded, determined and, above all, effective. BL: He didn't even wear a dress to the ring. He must have been serious, Timmy. TD: And indeed he was, Becky. Acorn took it to the Patriot in this encounter, and although he was forced to absorb a substantial amount of punishment from the big patriotic powerhouse, taking the match outside the ring proved to be the turning point for Acorn. Making good -- not to say illegal, of course -- use of ringposts, crowd railings and the steel steps, Acorn very quickly managed to wear the Patriot down, damaging his right leg with vicious shots to the knee. Rolling him back into the ring, Acorn was able to apply his Newark Knife cloverleaf submission for the win. [WINNER: "Badboy" Randy Acorn via submission in 13:22.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Lord Byron vs. Scott "the Whine" Bloom 265lbs, 6'4" 195lbs, 5'10" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Rumours are flying that all is not well between Lord Byron and the Lady DeWinter. Certainly, given the footage we showed you in yesterday's report, there seems to be some grounds on which to base this speculation. And DeWinter's absence from ringside for Byron's match tonight is surely only going to add fuel to the fire. However, Byron looked even more determined than ever to assert himself in the ring tonight, and assert himself he did. The scrawny Scott "the Whine" Bloom practically snapped under the strain of the Aristoclutch, which Byron seems to have refined since Dirt Dog Unique Allah escaped from the hitherto "inescapable" hold on Saturday night. [WINNER: Lord Byron by submission in 3:11.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= RISING SUN REVOLUTION vs. THE HANGMEN Ryudu Kenjinata & Hiroshi Kasai Hangman #1 & Hangman #2 comb. 570lbs comb. 715lbs =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: It seems the Hangmen have a few bones to pick with somebody... [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier tonight." One of the Hangmen stands in the locker room area. He addresses the camera:] TH: Enough of the fancy camera stuff. I have one thing to say to the person or persons resposible for the so-called appearance of the Senator. The Senator is dead. All you are doing is fooling yourselves into thinking you can get to me and the boys. Well, you are wrong. This is the last time we will speak of The FAKE Senator. It is also the last time we will even consider the possibility. You show up somewhere in the arena and do what you have to, our matches are more important to us then a figment. If and when you finally get the nerve to step in the ring, BE PREPARED. Our ropes will feel real good to you around your neck as the life you hold so dearly is drained from your being. You, sir or sirs, are marked men. Dross, if I find out that you have anything to do with this, you will want to face the Venusian Death Cell again before you even get in the same country with me. While we are at it, Dross, if I do find out it is you behind this, and you better hope a rumor about it does not start, I just might believe it. This rope will fit around your neck and a new video will be filmed for frames of The Hangman's History Book. Dross, put a stop to this. As I started out this little fit of anger by saying, this is the last time I will speak of The Senator. [The Hangman turns and walks away. Cut back to the studio. Becky looks at Dross quizically.] BL: My, my -- you _have_ been busy, Timmy. First you poison the VDC, and now you try to pass yourself off as the Senator! TD: [exasperated] Folks, I really don't have anything to do with any of this. Let's move on. As we discovered yesterday, Rising Sun Revolution appear to have finally succumbed to the Alphabet Boys... BL: [interrupting] Taken pity on the morons, more likely. TD: Well, whatever the reason for Ryudu and Hiroshi to have brought the Alphabet Boys with them to ringside, the fans certainly seemed to enjoy Abie and Zed's antics. However, the Hangmen weren't so impressed, since they were the victims of numerous distractions throughout this match. First of all they had to deal with the not inconsiderable distraction of the ABoys on the outside, but secondly, they seemed to be looking over their shoulders into the crowd throughout the match. BL: They were probably looking for the Senator, since he seems to have taken an interest in their affairs from beyond the grave. TD: In fact, the supposed "Senator" did not appear during tonight's match, but I know that the Hangmen are concerned that they must catch whomever is attempting to hoodwink them next time he makes an appearance. But the most significant distraction in this match was the arrival of the Venusian Death Cell at ringside. The VDC was injured by the Hangman back in June last year, and the old wounds still haven't healed. He's determined to get revenge, and he started out by costing the Hangmen their match against RSR tonight. The Cell came down to the ring and spat his green liquid in the face of one of the Hangmen, and then left ringside. The Hangman on the outside followed the Cell up the aisle, leaving his temporarily blinded comrade in the ring at the mercy of the Demon and the Dragon. Let's go over to Larry Morton to find out what happened next. [Tim and Becky turn to face the video wall, on which Larry Morton appears, standing at the head of the aisle in the empty Coliseum.] LM: Thanks, Tim. We witnessed yet another sneak attack here tonight. As the Cell lured one of the Hangmen up the aisle, leaving his partner to fall prey to the Naginata Nightmare in the ring and be pinned by Rising Sun Revolution, the unsuspecting Hangman was jumped by the Cell's stablemates, the High Plains Drifters. It seems that talk of friendship between the Drifters and the Hangman has turned into so much hot air, as Josey Wales' men beat down the big Texan. The third Hangman ran out from the locker rooms to even the score, but security managed to break up the brawl before anybody was injured. However, that wasn't to be the end of the confrontations for the evening. I'll have more to say on that later on. For now, back to you in the studio. [The IIWF logo fades back onto the video wall as Tim and Becky turn to face the cameras once more.] TD: Perhaps Rising Sun Revolution would have liked to have scored a cleaner pinfall in their return match, but a victory's a victory, and they'll be looking for title action again in the near future. BL: If they had half a brain between them, they'd ditch the Albatross Boys. [WINNERS: Rising Sun Revolution by pinfall in 16:31.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Highwayman vs. Venusian Death Cell 285lbs, 6'4" 332lbs, 6'5" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Having only just interfered in the Hangmen's match, the Venusian Death Cell made another appearance, this time to face highly-touted newcomer, the Highwayman. Both of these athletes are powerful individuals, and fans were expecting a hard-fought battle between the two. The Cell was accompanied to the ring by the High Plains Drifters and Josey Wales, and those reinforcements proved useful. The Highwayman had clearly studied his opponent thoroughky, since he wisely avoided matching power with him, instead looking towards the technical side of his repertoire for holds to wear the big man down. BL: Since when has a punch been a technical hold, Timmy? TD: Punches and a great deal besides, Becky. The Highwayman started the match aggressively, and caught the Cell -- who was probably looking over his shoulder for the Hangmen -- off guard, nearly scoring the pinfall in the first few seconds with a quick inside cradle. The Cell was shocked, and the Highwayman laid into him with punches and kicks, before laying him out with a brainbuster very early on. Pale and Easy Rider came to their comrade's aid, jumping to the apron and distracting the Highwayman, buying the Cell some valuable time to recover. BL: And you'll notice it didn't take him long to turn the tide of the match, Timmy. TD: Indeed not. A boot to the Highwayman's back, followed up by a blatant chokehold... BL: [interrupting] Reverse chinlock, Timmy. It was a chinlock. TD: Hmm. The Highwayman was soon taken down and the Cell began to asphyxiate the Englishman with chokes. He really took the wind out of the Highwayman's sails, and looked to have things sewn up when he set his opponent up for his trademark chokeslam, but the Highwayman grabbed the Cell's hand with both hands, twisted him into a wristlock, kicked him in the midsection, draped a leg over the back of his head and then performed a legdrop DDT on the big man -- all in the blink of an eye. However, the Cell kicked out at the last moment, and then all hell broke loose. All three Hangmen stormed down to ringside, and the referee was immediately given three more things to worry about. BL: The stupid official should have kept his eyes on what was going on in the ring. TD: Perhaps he should. While two of the Hangmen brawled on the outside with the Drifters, the other Hangman entered the ring and choked out the Cell with his noose. The Highwayman wasn't impressed, and clotheslined the Hangman out of the ring, but the damage was done. Being the opportunist that he is, however, the Highwayman wasn't above taking advantage of the situation with his Daylight Robbery neckbreaker, a truly devastating hold. BL: Even more devastating after you've been choked out by a rope. TD: Either way, the Highwayman walks out with a second victory, and the war between the Posse and the Hangmen is turned up another notch. Larry Morton has an update: [Tim and Becky turn to face the video wall, on which appears the image of Larry Morton, still standing at the head of the aisle in the Coliseum.] LM: Yes, Tim. After the two altercations we saw tonight in the Coliseum, I understand that the Posse and the Hangmen are both lobbying the Special Concerns Committee for the singles match between the Cell and the Hangman scheduled later in the month to be turned into a six-man affair pitting the two factions against one another. More on that as I get it. For now, back to you in the studio. [Tim and Becky turn back to face the cameras as the IIWF logo fades back onto the video wall.] [WINNER: Highwayman by pinfall in 17:54.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Nightwing vs. Harlequin Chaos 235lbs, 6'3" 325lbs, 6'7" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Following Harlequin Melody's disappearance thanks to Mr. Damage last Saturday night, Harlequin Chaos has, by all accounts, been out of control. Tonight he was accompanied to the ring by his brother, Harlequin Tragedy, who also exercises some degree of control over Chaos -- not with music, but with intimidation. Tragedy barked instructions at Chaos throughout this match with the young Native American sensation, Nightwing. Nightwing was not only outnumbered but undersized and underpowered in comparison to Chaos, but he was undeterred, and did his best to stave off the power assault of the angry Chaos. Larry Morton has the details: [While Becky disinterestedly files her nails, Tim turns to face the video wall, on which Larry Morton appears, standing backstage once more.] LM: Thanks, Tim. Nightwing was giving away almost one hundred pounds in this encounter, but his superiour speed and agility enabled him to stay one step ahead of Chaos throughout. The Harlequin's tactics were obvious -- Chaos was mad, and he was looking for somebody to take it out on. However, Nightwing only frustrated him further by wrestling a defense-strike match, staying out of the way of Chaos' power moves, until Chaos hit a swinging neckbreaker and turned the tide of the match. From that point on, Nightwing took one hell of a beating, but Chaos was unable to pin his shoulders to the canvas for the three count, and in his frustration, despite the protestations of Tragedy, went to the outside and grabbed a steel chair, taking it into the ring and waffling Nightwing with it. The referee had no choice but to signal for the disqualification, but Chaos had lost it, and he kicked Nightwing from the ring before being restrained by his brother. However, Chaos wasn't finished, and after pushing around the ring announcer, grabbed the microphone. [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier Tonight." Harlequin Chaos, his face scarlet with rage, screams into the microphone in the middle of the ring, his brother beside him.] CHAOS: DAMAGE!!! I KNOW YOU'RE LISTENING DAMAGE!!! I know what you've done to my friend, and believe me pal, I am very, very, VERY PISSED OFF!!! [Crowd pop] CHAOS: You have to be a very sick individual to do what you have done to Melody. And believe me, I know a sick mind when I see it. I'M THE EXPERT ON SICK MINDS! Back at the institution, they used to give me a few "time outs" when I was being unruly... and when I was really acting up, that's when the electroshock was pulled in! I've had enough volts put through me to light up the entire state of Texas! And it helped a little! So I was thinking, what would be better to cure that head of yours than to put about ten million volts of electricity through you?! [Huge crowd pop] CHAOS: An Electroshock Therapy Match! Loser gets lit up like a light bulb! Be a man for a change! And I'll throw YOU on the barby! [Chaos throws down the microphone and storms out of the ring, trailing Tragedy in his wake. Cut back to Tim and Becky in the studio.] TD: Well, Nightwing takes the victory, but after the beating he took at the hands of Chaos, I bet he doesn't feel much like a winner. [WINNER: Nightwing by disqualification in 20:11.] BL: Meanwhile, back at the Damage ranch, Mr. Damage has been subjecting Harlequin Melody to the worst torture known to womankind -- housework. [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier this week." Mr. Damage's spotless mansion, Damage relaxing in an arm chair.] MD: Well, since I got me some hired help last Saturday, my house is spotless. This floor is so clean you could eat off it. All thanks to my new maid, Melody. The only problem is when I want her to do anything I have to sing it. Also [whispering] she can't cook either, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. Now I know why Harlequin Chaos didn't give chase on Saturday Night. He wanted some real food. [singing] Melody, could you come here please? Melody: [singing] Yes Sir, what can I do for you? MD: [singing] Can you look into that camera [points] and tell the world how much you like working for me? Melody: [singing] I love working for you! MD: [singing] Thank you Melody, you are excused, I think the toilet needs cleaning. Give it a good hand scrubbing. Melody: [singing] It would be my pleasure, sir. MD: You know, these days it's hard to find good help, and Chaos you are gonna need all the help you can get, because these are my demands if you want your precious songstress back. Firstly I want to wrestle you again, best of three falls. If you win I will release Melody -- no more questions asked, I've had my fun. But if you lose I want you to come and work for me for one week, and one week only, and do what I ask. I have ways in making you a willing participant as you know. I ask that this match be sanctioned for Saturday Night in ten days' time. So, Chaos, just sign the dotted line, and you can have your precious little songstress back. [singing] And I did it Myyyyyyyy Wayyyyyyy! [Fade. Cut back to the studio.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= BRAGGING RIGHTS MATCH (no countout, no disqualification): =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= ARMED FORCES vs. G.W.R. NavCom & DefCon Loco & Spoiler comb. 643lbs comb. 545lbs ----------------------------------------------------------------------- TD: The new and improved attitude of the Armed Forces is laudable, but it didn't prove to be too effective in the ring tonight, as they got rather more than they bargained for against a resurgent G.W.R. Outnumbered by four to two, NavCom and DefCon were always fighting a losing battle against Loco and Spoiler, along with their mysterious, huge bodyguard and General Kane on the outside, but things took an even heavier swing for the worse -- excuse the pun -- when G.W.R. brought a set of golfclubs out from under the ring. What occurred after that isn't suitable for family viewing, folks. The two teams brawled viciously around the ringside area using the golf clubs as weapons, and I dare say that neither will have walked out of this match without some heavy duty bruising. In the end, however, G.W.R.'s mysterious bodyguard sealed the pinfall victory for Kane's men when he dumped the entire golf bag on NavCom, allowing Loco to hit a belly-to-belly suplex for the three count. After the match, the Forces were deflated but philosophical: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier tonight." NavCom and DefCon, the Armed Forces, are in the back following their match with G.W.R. Larry Morton is back there with them. Aaron the Caddy, again, is nowhere to be found.] LM: I'm joined by the Armed Forces, who earlier tonight faced G.W.R. in a hotly-contested... well, brawl. Even though you didn't come out winners this evening, I was duly impressed by your respectable actions and tactics in this match. Guys, what about it? NC: [nursing bruises with an icepack] Larry, you act surprised. And I don't blame you. We've been pretty crooked arrows around here for a while. You wanna know why we had a respectable plan of attack? It's simple. First off, we have respect for Loco and Spoiler. Sure, they proved tonight they don't have any respect for us, but every time we've faced them, they've given us more than a good match. It's been a run for our money every time. We have a great deal of respect for these two, due to their good military leadership and their resilience in the ring. They _deserved_ a good, clean match, and we gave them one. If only... [he winces as he moves the icepack to his ribs] If only they could have extended us the same courtesy instead of whacking us with golf clubs. Secondly, we feel that we, too, deserve respect in the tag team ranks here in the IIWF, and want to go out and earn that. It's the American way. Third, it's our military training. Back when we were in the military, we always learned about not taking shortcuts, working hard, doing what's right. We did that here tonight, and even though we did not win, we can be proud of a good effort. LM: No Aaron out at ringside tonight... what difference did it make? DC: Not much, Larry, not much. Aaron is a great manager. As in managing contracts, negotiations, etc. And he is a good teacher in tag team wrestling. But he's already taught us what we need to know. We don't need him coaching us at ringside any more, because he's already instilled in us his confidence and knowledge. He's a big asset to the team, and will continue to be so. LM: In what capacity? DC: He's still with us. He's just behind the scenes now. He's working on deals, worrying about contracts and such. I think that the reduced strain -- from not going to the ring and fearing for his life -- will help him concentrate on his real cup of tea... and that's negotiating. LM: Thanks for your time, gentlemen. The Armed Forces, they came up a bit short here earlier tonight, falling at the hands of Loco and Spoiler of G.W.R., but perhaps made a stride toward a better good. Back to you two in the studio. Tim... [Cut back to the announcers' table.] BL: Better good?! Pah! TD: I'm not quite sure what to make of the Forces in recent weeks, Becky, but I think they might, as Larry says, be making good progress. [WINNERS: G.W.R. by pinfall in 17:55.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Brody Thunder & Billy Shakespeare vs. Tiger Claw & Casey James comb. 497lbs comb. 540lbs =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Everybody expected a wild brawl when this match was signed, and a wild brawl was exactly what the fans got to see in this encounter. IIWF Champion Dan Kauffman also got a good view of the action, as he watched most of the match from the aisle, apparently scouting Brody Thunder. He also had a few choice gestures for Casey James, who is still parading around with Kauffman's title belt, but none of them are fit to be repeated on national television. However, the end of this match is surrounded in controversy. Let's go to footage of the closing moments. Larry Morton and "Soundbite" Steve Roberts were at ringside: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier Tonight." Billy Shakespeare is in the ring with Tiger Claw.] LM: Billy's been in there an awfully long time, Steve, and he's taking quite the beating. SR: From what I heard, Pukespeare is the type that likes that sort of thing. LM: You have no grounds for that. SR: Becky told me. LM: Well, it _must_ be true, then. In fact, Claw's been in the ring a long time, too. He's ignored Casey's requests for a tag on a number of occasions now. SR: He's having fun in there with Pukespeare. Little Willy can't string any offense together at all. Why should Claw give Casey the break? LM: Well, Lau's yelling at Claw to make the tag now. Wow! Claw just flashed an evil look at the Syndicate's manager right there. But he's going to the corner to make the tag anyway. [Tiger Claw drags Shakespeare into the corner. Casey James grabs hold of him as Claw backs across the ring. Claw is about to execute a running strike when Brody Thunder grabs him, dragging him over the top rope to the outside. Casey James goes to work on the exhausted Billy Shakespeare. He delivers a roundhouse right and a forearm uppershot. He lifts Bily's limp arm in the air and points to his chest.] SR: Here it comes, oh yes, the heart punch! LM: If he lands that it's over. Shakespeare's plan for revenge is finished. [Casey winds up for the heart punch, but Shakespeare delivers a knee which breaks the hold. He stumbles to his corner for the tag, but Thunder is still outside with Tiger Claw. Claw delivers a series of chops, then attempts a round kick. Thunder grabs the flying foot and dumps Claw on the concrete. Immediately he begins to choke him. In the ring Billy is waving for the tag, but Thunder doesn't seem to notice him.] LM: Billy has got to get this tag, but Thunder can't hear him above the noise of the crowd. SR: This is great! This is just like last time Shakespeare met the Syndicate. Thunder can hear him, he just doesn't want to. He's dumping Little Willy just like Hakiro did! [Casey James drags Shakespeare onto his shoulder then delivers a running spinebuster that lays Shakespeare out. Outside, Brian Lau approaches Brody Thunder with a chair. The cowboy sees him and wrenches the chair from his grasp. He sees Casey making the cover inside the ring - 1 - 2 - 3! Brody climbs in at the last moment, but is too late. Brody clears the ring with his chair as the Syndicate exits laughing. Tiger Claw stops dramatically at the entrance to point his finger at Brody. It is a few moments before Shakespeare gets to his feet. He ignores Thunder's offer of a hand. The two exit to a pop from the crowd.] SR: Twice Pukespeare has tried to beat the Syndicate and twice he's gone out limping. You think he'd learn. Maybe he's been dropped on his head too many times. LM: I think that maybe he'll have a few words for his tag partner. SR: Something like: "I'm not worthy of being in the ring with you. Please put me out of my misery"? LM: I don't think so. SR: Everything Becky ever said about you is true, isn't it? [Cut back to Tim and Becky in the studio. Becky is stifling her giggles.] TD: So, folks, things don't look good in the Shakespeare/Thunder camp going into Billy's big triangle match for the Intercontinental Championship this Saturday, and the Syndicate walk out with yet another stolen victory. Will Shakespeare even be in any shape to wrestle this Saturday? BL: Is he ever? [WINNERS: Casey James and Tiger Claw by pinfall in 23:14.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= IRONMAN MATCH: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Ronnie Paris vs. Mad Dog Watkins 210lbs, 6'0" 269lbs, 6'5" ----------------------------------------------------------------------- TD: This was the match that everybody was waiting for, and for the first forty-five minutes, nobody was disappointed. The action in this match went back and forth, with both men pulling out some of the finest technical wrestling the IIWF has ever seen. Sadly, we don't have time to show you anything but the closing moments of the match, but allow me to recap just a few of the highlights in this titanic encounter: [The video wall displays stills of the action, subtitled with the duration of the match to that point. The counter reads "12:31".] TD: Within fifteen minutes of the match starting, Watkins had Paris in trouble, having exercised his five inch height advantage and sixty pound weight advantage to wear the youngster down with high-impact, punishing moves. He scored the first pinfall of the match in 12:31 after a Tiger Driver. [The video wall shows another still, at "22:19".] TD: Paris found his way back into the match, however, wearing Watkins down with nerve and submission holds, including one of his favourite holds, the sleeper, in which Watkins was trapped for more than two minutes. The Mad Dog fought his way out of the sleeper, but was still feeling the effects when he was caught in a beautifully executed German suplex for a fall. [The video wall shows another still, at "57:22".] TD: The action continued going backwards and forwards between the two men for the next thirty-five minutes, during which time numerous IIWF superstars filtered out from the locker room to watch these two athletes go at it. Around the thirty-five minute mark, Watkins took the action outside, and really gave Paris a hiding with ringside objects, but still it wasn't enough to put Ronnie's shoulders to the mat for a second time. Paris also cinched in a well-executed figure four leglock at the forty minute mark, but Watkins sustained the pain for more than three minutes before managing to roll over and reverse the hold, forcing Paris to grab the ropes. However, fans were robbed of a fitting end to this supremely athletic encounter thanks to the Intercontinental Champion. Let's go to the closing moments. Larry Morton and "Soundbite" Steve Roberts are once again at ringside: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier tonight." The two wrestlers are in the ring. Paris scoops Watkins from behind for an inside cradle. Paris hooks Watkins' legs, then Watkins rolls over backwards and kneels on Paris' shoulders. Paris counters, hooking Watkins' shoulders with his legs and forcing him back onto the mat. The exchange of near falls continues.] LM: Wow! I don't think I've ever seen so many -- did he get him? No! So close! Now Paris with the cover! One - two - thr... no! Paris with a huge uppercut to Watkins! SR: Ouch! I can feel that shot all the way over here, Morton! LM: Every person in the Coliseum felt that shot, Steve! The wrestlers around the ring are cheering these two athletes on -- hang on, Steve Kowalski is getting up onto the ring apron! SR: Yeah! Go get 'em, Fury! [Watkins slumps to one knee as Paris raises his fist to the crowd, who pop appreciatively as Paris winds up to lay Watkins out. However, Paris is distracted by Kowalski, and approaches the ropes. Kowalski jaws with Paris for a few moments, while Watkins pulls himself together behind Paris' back. Suddenly, Kowalski reaches into his jeans, pulls out a set of brass knuckles, and clocks Paris. Huge heel pop! The youngster topples backwards over Watkins, who rolls him up and hooks both legs for his second fall - 1 - 2 - 3!] LM: Watkins has Paris two falls to one with only two minutes remaining! It doesn't look good for the youngster here! SR: Paris is getting a mighty fine view of the Coliseum ceiling from down there, Barry... LM: It's Larry, Steve. SR: Whatever. Paris isn't getting up! LM: How ironic that Paris should demand no countout and no disqualification stipulations, and should then be knocked out by Kowalski's brass knuckles. Perhaps Kowalski and Watkins do have some kind of alliance forming? SR: Why do you say that, Moron? LM: That's Morton, Steve. SR: Whatever. If the Fury wants to lay out the rookie, he'll damn well lay him out. That's what I like about the guy -- he takes a back seat to nobody. LM: Even when he has _nothing_ to do with the match? SR: Sure. LM: Time is running out here, folks -- we've got just thirty seconds to go! Watkins drags Paris to his feet, whips him into the ropes... hey! [Paris ducks under a clothesline attempt from Watkins, who spins around and is met by a dropkick from Paris! Huge pop! Watkins is quickly back to his feet, and is taken down to the canvas with a Perfectplex, bridging Watkins' shoulders to the mat! The referee counts - 1 - 2 - Ding! Ding! Ding!] LM: Yes! Paris tied the match! SR: No, he didn't, Moron! The count only reached two before the time limit ran out. The referee didn't signal for the bell -- the timekeeper rang it because the time limit expired! LM: No! I can't believe it! Paris was so close to taking this match into sudden death! Can we get the official word? [Both men lie exhausted on the mat as the ring announcer's voice booms out across the Coliseum:] RA: Ladies and gentlemen, the time limit in this match has expired. Therefore, the winner of the Iron Man match with two falls to one... Mad Dog Watkins! [Huge mixed pop as the referee raises Watkins' arm, even though the Mad Dog is still lying on his back in the ring, his chest heaving from the exertion of the match.] LM: What a match! Well, Paris may have lost, but he can leave the ring with his head held high -- he wrestled brilliantly for an hour, and had it not been for the interference of Steve Kowalski, I think he could have taken the victory. SR: Don't mean to be rude, Barry, but who in hell cares what you think? [Cut back to the studio.] TD: That truly was an incredible encounter, and I would like to extend my congratulations to both Mad Dog Watkins _and_ Ronnie Paris for putting on a sheer wrestling display the likes of which the Coliseum fans had never before seen. [WINNER: Mad Dog Watkins by two falls to one.] TD: Okay, folks, we're very nearly out of time here tonight, but before we leave you, let's take a look ahead to this Saturday night's blockbuster card. Ten huge matche have been signed, and as ever, the line-up reads like a "who's who" of the IIWF. One of the most eagerly-awaited contests pits long-time rivals the Subway Psycho and Otto Verhoeven against one another in a Third Rail Match. The Psycho was backstage with Larry Morton a few moments ago, and had the following comments: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier Tonight." Larry Morton is in the backstage interview area, standing by the Subway Psycho, who is wearing street clothes, but still has his trademark eye black. His hair hangs over his face as he stands facing the camera.] LM: I'm pleased to have with us the Subway Psycho. Thanks for dropping by, Psycho. I know you have a lot on your mind and you're preparing for your upcoming Third Rail Match this Saturday Night versus Otto Verhoeven, so real quickly... what's to become of Sasha now that she won her valet match? SP: That was probably the last time any of you will see Sasha near an IIWF arena. She has become a source of worry for me when she's at ringside, or in the building for that matter. At my request she will be stepping down from her valet duties. She'll remain with me as my manager, but she'll manage from her office. This way I can concentrate on what's going on _in_ the ring. LM: Psycho, your thoughts on IIWF newcomer, Nightwing? SP: I can't say I know a whole lot about the man. What I do know is that he and his feathered friend came to my aid last week. I don't know what his motives are. Why anyone would put themselves out on a limb versus Otto is beyond me. From what I know of Native Americans, they're a proud and honorable people. He appears to fit this mold. I am always extremely wary of who I align myself with, however. But I thank Nightwing and wish him the best of luck. LM: Any closing thoughts going into your Third Rail Match? SP: Don't get me started. Once I decide to let you know about that... believe me, you'll know it. I don't feel like blowing my top right now. [The Psycho stalks out of shot. Cut back to the studio.] TD: Other incredible matches signed for this Saturday's card include a triangle match for the Intercontinental Championship pitting Steve Kowalski against Marty Warnett and Billy Shakespeare; Chris Quigley, with Otto Verhoeven in his corner, faces Danny Dynamite of the Players' Club; the Dark Disciples defend their tag team championships against Domination; the "Enigma" Takezo Musashi defends his Cruiserweight Championship against Harlequin Tragedy; IIWF World Champion Dan Kauffman will be in non-title action against Morningstar of Pain Inc.; Brody Thunder promises he will have a surprise in store for Tiger Claw in their rematch from last Saturday; Creed will face a mystery challenger, and G.W.R. will square off against the High Plains Drifters. It promises to be an unbelievable night of wrestling action, folks, so join myself and "Soundbite" Steve Roberts in the Coliseum on Saturday Night! BL: Now give them the good news, Timmy. TD: This isn't good news, Becky. BL: Yes it is. I get Friday night off! TD: Sadly, fans, the IIWF Report has been pre-empted on its usual channels this Friday night, so there will be no edition of Inside the IIWF this week. However, the IIWF Hotline is available twenty-four hours on 1-900-325-IIWF for all the latest news and rumours, with new updates this Sunday. The normal programming schedule will resume next Tuesday. Until this Saturday, for Becky LaRue, Larry Morton and "Soundbite" Steve Roberts, saying... BL: Nighty-night, everyone! [The lights in the studio drop, and the IIWF logo fades from the video wall. Fade] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Steve Owens | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | sowens@admin.presby.edu | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | IIWFadmin@aol.com | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+