##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= H + O + T + L + I + N + E #1-900-325-IIWF =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= 2 March 1997 ----------------------------------------------- [click] --------------------------- OPTION #1: The Dross Report --------------------------- Hello there, folks, and thanks for calling. You've reached the Dross Report for Sunday, March 2, 1997. I'm Tim Dross, and we're coming off the back of a shocking weekend here in the IIWF. Before we get down to the news, a quick note for listeners -- the censors weren't happy to run Steve Roberts' option, "Soundbite Speaks", this week on account of his somewhat colourful reaction to the events of last night, so instead, we present a special transcript of an online chat session with "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley. Okay, folks, let's talk a little about what went down in the IIWF Coliseum last night. A live crowd of almost twenty thousand fans and a worldwide television audience of millions watched in shock and awe as two individuals from the so-called "loop" federations -- EWA, DPW and PCW -- ran roughshod over Coliseum security and invaded the wrestling ring, trashing the IIWF and its wrestlers, all in the name of a little cheap publicity. The two individuals concerned -- Mr. Robinson and Super Scott, real name Scott Hibbs -- are among the most famous names in the wrestling world today, but they are famed for very different qualities than the athletes of the IIWF. Robinson has run up an incredible win/loss record of 20-0, a feat that would be unimaginable in the IIWF. I've heard a number of rumours concerning just how this record has been achieved, and I believe that large amounts of money change hands behind closed doors in the so-called "loop" between wrestlers, their agents, and the top officials of the leagues. Corruption, it seems, is rife. Super Scott, on the other hand, is known more for his mouth than his wrestling talents, and, as he proved last night, he's lost none of his ability to badmouth anybody and everybody within sight. The wrestlers and the officials of the IIWF, who were backstage watching flabberghasted as two separate incidents unfolded, reacted in much the same way. According to locker room sources, many of the IIWF's superstars were watching the live broadcast on a video feed in their locker rooms, and some of the more level-headed athletes reportedly had to restrain their more fiery comrades from bursting into the arena and sparking a very ugly scene indeed. Inappropriate and unjustified as the comments of the "loop" representatives were, for the IIWF's superstars to run into a brawl with them would have reflected badly on both themselves and the IIWF. Officials, on the other hand, were up in arms over the way in which these two men were able to flout Coliseum security so openly and make their way to the ring on two occasions with very little resistance. I understand that the IIWF President will be meeting with head of security, Dennis "Griff" Griffing, in his office on Monday morning, and a full enquiry into the incident will be launched. Perhaps more worryingly, the faceless paymasters of the IIWF, the Board of Directors, are apparently not over-concerned about the invasion of these two individuals, and may even tie the President's hands in his pursuit of legal action. According to my sources, they may be willing to allow individuals such as Mr. Robinson and Super Scott to make more impromptu appearances on the IIWF's premier weekly show in an effort to boost ratings. Although the IIWF currently dominates the Saturday night audience, the Directors are always keen to increase that domination, and they see the Superstar Summit as the perfect way of keeping the fans tuned in between now and April 6, when the event goes down at Wembley Stadium, London, England. It is rumoured that IIWF matches at the event will include Chris Quigley challenging either the Subway Psycho or Casey "Blackheart" James, whoever the IIWF World Heavyweight Champion should be by April 6, and a champion vs. champion match pitting the IIWF World Tag Team Champions against the IIWF United States Tag Team Champions. In addition, the IIWF will, as previously announced, have a representative in the Summit Cup, the special eight-man round-robin tournament, and current front-runners are said to include Creed, Billy Shakespeare, Mad Dog Watkins and Brody Thunder. We'll keep you up to date on these matches as we near the big event. In the meantime, we may be forced to endure more embarrassing and intimidating attacks from the "loop". I sincerely hope that cool heads prevail, because the last thing we need is a huge war breaking out between the IIWF and a conglomerate of three other leagues. The IIWF President has had a hard week -- not only has he the events of last night to worry about, but his hard-working Vice-President dropped a huge bombshell on the front office earlier last week when he announced his intention to retire as soon as a suitable replacement could be found. IIWF Vice-President Steve Owens took office last October, and quickly stamped his own personality on his chief areas of jurisdiction, the IIWF's twice-weekly magazine report shows. The front office was rocked by Mr. Owens' decision, which came out of the blue on Tuesday, and top-ranking officials are now involved in a desperate fight to find somebody willing to replace the departing Vice-President as soon as possible. To date, all avenues explored have resulted in dead ends, and it appears that if a suitable candidate is not soon found to step into his shoes, the IIWF may suffer some severe cut-backs in terms of programming in the near future. Let's hope that eventuality doesn't come about, folks. That's about it for now, folks. Don't forget to call back next Sunday night for the return of "Soundbite" Steve Roberts, and a whole lot more behind-the-scenes news, rumours and speculations right here on the Dross Report. Until then, this is Tim Dross, saying: so long, everybody, and thanks for calling the IIWF Hotline! ------------------------- OPTION #2: AOL transcript ------------------------- AOLHost: Everyone, welcome the man who will meet Dan Kauffman at Ring Wars III... "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley!! AOLCQ: Hi everybody. Joe23: What do you really think of Dan Kauffman? AOLCQ: Dan's a great wrestler and a nice guy behind the scenes. But that ain't going to help him at Ring Wars. :) LigerMan: How old are you? AOLCQ: I'm now 27 years old. I've got lots of time left yet to kick some butt in the IIWF. JennyK: Do you have a girlfriend? AOLCQ: Yes, I'm happy to say that I've been seeing Stephanie Manning, yes, the younger sister of Kurt Manning, for almost a year now, I guess. AOLHost: Once again, we are here live with Chris Quigley. Send your questions in! RalphB: Why did you want to become a wrestler? AOLCQ: I love sports, but I had a few problems with my knees, and that prevented me from becoming a goaltender, which was what I really wanted to do originally. I was able to work around my knee problems as a wrestler, and I now believe I have basically no weaknesses. I'm glad I became a wrestler now. GaryA: Who trained you? AOLCQ: Steve Manning Sr, down in his basement in Phoenix, Arizona. He trained his sons, Kurt and Steve Jr, as well as myself, Zack Malone, and other wrestlers like Trey Porter, Mark Bagwell, and even Dan Kauffman breifly stopped by there. It's a famous place. MattS: WHEN ARE YOU GETTING A WORLD TITLE SHOT? AOLCQ: Ha! Ha! I wish I knew. Most likely after Ring Wars. Soon after, I hope. After I beat Kauffman, I'll be on such a high that the World champion will be no problem at all for me. KateW: Who do you respect most as a wrestler? AOLCQ: It'd have to be either Chris Taylor or Trey Porter. Probably Taylor because he doesn't cheat as much as Porter does. :) In the IIWF, it'd most likely be Dan Kauffman or Ronnie Paris. Both real good wrestlers. Verhoeven is good too though. Lucy123: Any chance of taking after another wrestler and posing for Playgirl? ;) AOLCQ: Ha! I really doubt it, but thanks for the compliment... I think. :) NetNut232: Who would you most like to meet in the ring? AOLCQ: Dan Kauffman. Waylon87: What's the best federation you wrestled in? AOLCQ: There's been quite a few... WIWF was good. TAEWF is a great federation as well, but I think the IIWF is head and shoulders above the rest. That's why I really want to make my mark here, more than anything. DanFan: Don't you think you're overlooking Dan Kauffman a bit? I don't think you're better than he is. AOLCQ: Everyone has their opinion, but the facts will be laid out for everyone after our match at Ring Wars III. AOLHost: That's all the time we have for tonight! Big thanks to the IIWF and to "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley for taking time out of his busy schedule to be with us tonight! AOLCQ: It was fun. I'll have to do it again sometime. Later, everybody. AOLHost: And don't forget to watch Ring Wars III! The latest offering from the IIWF featuring Dan Kauffman taking on Chris Quigley! Who is the best? Find out! ----------------------- OPTION #3: Can We Talk? ----------------------- Hi there, everybody. I'm Larry Morton, and as usual, I've been trailing the IIWF superstars over the past week to get their thoughts on a topical question. This week's poser: IF YOU WERE AN ANIMAL, WHAT WOULD IT BE? "SUPERSTAR" STUD STETSON: "This probably isn't the kind of answer you wanted, and it may sound a little pathetic, but I would really like to be Lace's pet dog. Mostly because that dog is closer to her then myself right now. Plus he gets all his food served to him and gets more petting then I ever got. That mutt probably even sleeps with her." LORD BYRON: "Simple. I wouldn't. But if everyone else in the IIWF was, [Byron sneers] you could consider me to be a _big_ game hunter." RISING SUN REVOLUTION: Ryudo: Now that's a tough one... Well, I guess I'd probably consider myself to be an eagle. Hiroshi here, on the other hand, he'd probably be a bear. Dani Jarvier would probably be the snake that tempted Adam... [Hiroshi growls something at Ryudo...] Ryudo: No, you can't be a Komodo Dragon. It just wouldn't work. You're a bear. "REAL DEAL" LUKE STEELE: "That's an easy one. The Real Deal would be a cheetah, 'cause of how fast and agile he is. Then there's Mr. Damage, who'd be a cheater... wait, too late." TEAM SYCHOSYS: "Sychosys" Joe Petrow: I'd be a human being. Duh! Majestic Maurice McArthur: Uh...what he said. CREED AND "THE CEO": Creed: I couldn't be an animal. An animal can be stopped. CEO: Hey, Mad "Dog" -- see you in three weeks. "BADBOY" RANDY ACORN: "I think I'd be a fox. Hell, I'm already a pretty sly guy. As for Petrow, he'd probably be a horse's ass as he seems to not be too stable coming together as a whole anything.... wacko SOB." DEATHBRINGER: "Now if I were an animal I would probably choose to be either a vulture or a hyena... But is that not what everyone would choose? To be one of those nice, cute animals?" MR. DAMAGE: "This is going to be pretty cliched being from Australia, but I'd like to be a Koala, 'cos you sit around all day in a tree eating leaves and making a load of other Koalas!" "QUICKSTRIKE" CHRIS QUIGLEY: "That's a strange question, but what the hell! I'd say either a wolf, as in lone wolf, but maybe even more accurate would be a lion. You know, "king of the jungle" and the most revered animal in the kingdom." MR. MIC, manager of PAIN INC.: "I would probably be a King Cobra. Very hyponotic to look around but deadly to mess around with. Wouldn't you agree, Zodiacs? As for the Zodiacs, they would probably be pack rats... one minute they have something, the next minute... NOTHING!" MORNINGSTAR, of PAIN INC.: "Stupid question, I ALREADY am an animal but for the purposes of this question I would have to say a jaguar. Quick, calculating, and deadly! Something the Zodiac Connection will find out soon enough..." TAURUS, of the ZODIAC CONNECTION: "I believe the answer to that question is quite obvious to fans of the Zodiac Connection!" PROPHETS OF RAGE: Shadoe: The soaring falcon. Derek: If I were an animal there's only one that I would be, the true king of all animals -- a bengal tiger. AMERICAN PATRIOT: "Is there any doubt? A bald eagle." STEVE "THE FURY" KOWALSKI: "I would be a barracuda. 'Cause I'm the most dangerous fish in this pond." CASEY "BLACKHEART" JAMES: "I already _AM_ an animal! But seriously, I'd be the extremely rare "Ass-Kicking, World Champ Lion," and everyone would fear me just as much as they do now." NIGHT PATROL: Hawkings: I would be a lioness... in the pride, the males wear the pretty colors and the females are the deadly hunters. Lt. Keene: I had a K-9 unit named "Shredder", so I would like to be a German Shephard. Sgt. Blazer: Whatever animal allows me to rip apart some punk is fine with me. THE SANDMAN: "The king of beasts, of course. If you don't know what that is I feel sorry for you." TIGER CLAW: "Do you really have to ask that question?" MARTY WARNETT: "I always wanted to be Animal. Such a great drummer ..." DIRT DOG UNIQUE ALLAH: "I'm just a po' little dirty doggy. Why would I wanna be another animal? Maybe a squirrel. They get people to feed 'em. My favourite animal, though, is a beaver!" [click] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Steve Owens | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | sowens@admin.presby.edu | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | IIWFadmin@aol.com | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+