##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= INTERNATIONAL INTERNET WRESTLING FEDERATION =============================================== W + E + D + N + E + S + D + A + Y W + A + R R + O + O + M ----------------------------------------------- + 9 April 1997 + [Fade through to a darkened studio: a figure sits behind a curved desk, behind which a large video wall, made up of a number of individual television screens, fades into life, each screen showing highlights from a different recent IIWF match. The studio lights rise, and the figure is revealed to be veteran announcer Tim Dross, who looks up from his papers and speaks:] TD: Howdy, folks, and welcome to the War Room! I'm Tim Dross, and it's time for our weekly look at the latest news in the IIWF, as well as a run-down of all the action from the midweek house show from the IIWF Coliseum. It's been quite an eventful week in the ring wars -- and the pace shows no signs of relenting after another night of controversy and double-crosses. With the next pay-per-view event, Birthday Bash, only one month away, the IIWF superstars are already champing at the bit to take another step towards the gold. [Footage of earlier action rolls on the video wall behind the desk: the Highwayman charges down the aisle carrying a canvas sack, and with a single red rose clenched between his teeth.] The Highwayman returned to the rings for the first time since Ring Wars III tonight, with a few words for troubled friend Nightwing. [Footage of Nightwing, fully bedecked in warpaint, making his way down the aisle, a solemn look of finality on his face. He looks to the ring, in which stands Tiger Claw.] Nightwing himself, however, found himself facing the same demons who threatened to break him on Saturday night as he battled Tiger Claw. [Footage of the Hangmen along with their manager, the Judge Roy Bean, standing outside the headquarters of Hangmen Inc.] The Hangmen have been on leave from the IIWF since their involvement at Ring Wars III, but they now return -- and all three were in action tonight. [Footage of the W & W Express making their way down the aisle.] They've been called the "dark horses" of the IIWF's tumultuous tag team ranks -- and tonight, the W & W Express went up against Cold Spell. [Footage of Cheshire cartwheeling his way down the aisle under the kaleidoscopic swirl of coloured lights.] A reunion of sorts for the bizarre Cheshire -- and another meeting with an old friend. We'll show you that footage in just a moment. [The IIWF logo fades back onto the video wall.] TD: All that and a lot more to talk about tonight -- so without further ado, let's get to the action: [Images of the wrestlers and their stats roll onto the video wall:] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Cheshire vs. Majestic Maurice McArthur 220lbs, 6' 220lbs, 6'1" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: As I mentioned, it was quite an eventful evening for young German clown, Cheshire. Quiet since his humiliating tarring and feathering at Ring Wars III after defeat at the hands of Nightwing, Cheshire returned to action tonight against the majestic one, Triple M. Let's go to the action as Cheshire makes his entrance. Your commentators are Larry Morton and the inimitable "Soundbite" Steve Roberts. [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier Tonight." Cheshire makes his way to the ring to the pacy beat of the Prodigy's "The Trick". He steps into the ring, giggling and pointing at McArthur, to a big heel pop. However, his music stops, and he turns to see Nightwing making his way down the aisle.] SR: Hey, great -- here comes that schizoid Injun, Barry! LM: It's Larry, Steve... but you're right. Nightwing has really been going through some difficult times as of late, and I simply don't know what possesses this young Native American to get into such confrontational situations. He's entering the ring... [Nightwing leaps to the apron and steps into the ring, shoving McArthur through the ropes to the outside as the confused Cheshire, and the equally confused crowd, look on. The fans are hushed as Nightwing stands before the clown with his arms outstretched and his head bowed, seemingly waiting for Cheshire to attack him.] SR: Go on, Cheshire, beat the snot out of him! LM: I don't think Cheshire wants any part of Nightwing. This is most strange -- as if Nightwing is looking for the man who will take his life from him. SR: All that spirit mumbo-jumbo means nothing to me or anybody else, Barry. Nightwing needs to pull himself together and stop looking for trouble he can't handle. [Agonising moments pass. Eventually, the referee moves to Nightwing and pulls him upright, ordering him from the ring. Cheshire, the grin wiped from his face, watches the Native American leave as Triple M climbs back into the ring and sneaks up behind Cheshire. The referee signals for the bell, and Cheshire wheels around, immediately applying his Humorizer on McArthur. Huge heel pop!] LM: Wow! Cheshire's wasted no time in slapping on that Humorizer! SR: And once you're trapped in the mandible claw, the only way to go is down. [The hold quickly saps McArthur's energy, and he flails fruitlessly, slumping to the mat. He kicks and struggles weakly, but Cheshire, with his huge grin restored and maniacal laughter ringing out over the jeers of the crowd, keeps the hold firmly applied. McArthur eventually stops moving, and the referee lifts his arm -- it falls back to the mat. The referee lifts the arm a second time -- again, it falls back to the mat. The referee lifts the arm for the third and final time -- and once more, it falls to the mat. The official quickly signals for the bell. Ding! Ding! Ding!] SR: Hey, why can't all matches be this short? Then I could get in a few more biscuits before bedtime. LM: What a devastating and paralysing hold that mandible claw is... McArthur's out cold! [Cheshire loosens the Humorizer and lets the official tend to the defeated Triple M. Cheshire laughs and dances to "The Trick" by Prodigy, ignoring the jeers of the Coliseum crowd. Suddenly the fans turn their heads, as three men come down the aisle. The first one is about sixty years old, with shoulder-length, grey hair, jeans and a flannel shirt. He looks rather sad and often glances at the man beside him, who's in his mid-forties and wears a black business suit. The third man is large, blond and has a stern expression. He seems to be the bodyguard of the second man.] SR: Hey, that senile old guy must have got lost on his way home to the old folks' home. LM: No, Steve -- I think Cheshire recognises these men. [Cheshire jumps over the top rope to meet them. He shakes the hand of the older man and gives him a short hug. The words "Vater" and "Gruess dich, mein Sohn" can be heard, then Cheshire's father introduces to him the other two men as "Herr Kaiser und sein Leibwaechter Herr Hinz". A conversation in German starts between Cheshire, his father and Herr Kaiser.] LM: That must be Cheshire's father, Herr Werner Cherforth, the owner of the circus in which his son got his start in life. SR: No kidding, Sherlock. Now clear them out of here -- we've got more matches to get through. LM: But who are those other two men? Cheshire certainly doesn't seem so pleased to see them. [Cheshire becomes more and more upset, and soon shouts at his father and Kaiser. "Bitte Herr Herforth, beruhigen Sie sich," says Kaiser with a smug grin and pulls out a paper from his jacket to show it to Cheshire. Cheshire grabs it and shreds it to pieces, then takes his father by the arm and they leave the arena. The two men follow them laughing.] LR: Well, I have no idea what that was all about. I'll go backstage and try to get some words with Cheshire in a moment. SR: Yeah, you do that. And bring me some biscuits while you're at it. [Cut back to the studio.] TD: Well, folks, I really don't know what to make of all that. I immediately sent young Steve Summer off to make some enquiries about what Cheshire's father and those two businessmen could have wanted with him, and early reports indicate that Herr Cherforth is in some kind of financial trouble, and may in fact have sold his circus to the mysterious Herr Kaiser -- whomever he may be. Larry Morton failed to find Cheshire backstage after the end of the show, but he's doing his best to get an interview with him for this Friday's "Countdown to Saturday Night." As for Nightwing, it seems that there is a strange relationship developing between these two individuals. Cheshire didn't seem to know what to make of Nightwing's show of deference tonight, and I don't either -- although we were to see a very different Nightwing later in the evening when he stepped into the ring to face Tiger Claw. More on that later on. [WINNER: Cheshire in 00:45.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Highwayman vs. Jumpin' Jack 285lbs, 6'4" 250lbs, 6'2" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: The only man in the IIWF who seems to have any understanding of Nightwing is the impressive Highwayman, who was in action against Jumpin' Jack tonight. One thing about the Highwayman is that he certainly knows how to make an entrance -- dashing down the aisle, canvas sack over his shoulder and a rose between his teeth -- and also how to make the evening of one lucky young lady in the crowd, who becomes the lucky recipient of the fresh red rose. In the ring, however, the Highwayman shuns such showmanship for a gritty style which, while not lacking in finesse, is direct and effective. Right from the bell, the burly Englishman drove a kick right into Jack's midsection and span him around with a haymaker. Displaying his technical knowledge, the Highwayman planted his opponent with not one German suplex -- all the more effective with 285lbs of force behind it -- but three! It looked like Highwayman could have ended it there, but, hauling Jack to his feet once more, the Englishman whipped him into the corner and followed in with a huge avalanche. Jack staggered out of the corner and was immediately trapped into a bear hug, literally squeezing the life out of him, before the Highwayman converted the hold into a powerful belly-to-belly suplex, once again driving the makeup-clad athlete into the mat. Finally opting to end the punishment, the Highwayman drew a thumb across his throat, shouted "Stand and deliver!" and, to the cheers of the capacity crowd, hit his swinging neckbreaker finisher for the cover. Having made a statement of action, the Englishman then opted to make a statement of words -- directed not only at the fans, but also at the troubled Nightwing: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier Tonight." The official helps the fallen Jumpin' Jack from the ring as Highwayman, hardly even breathing heavily, takes a microphone and steps into the centre of the ring. The crowd cheer as the masked Englishman raises the microphone to his mouth and speaks in his measured tones:] HWM: I won't keep you long, I just want to give out a couple of long overdue thanks -- starting with you all. Thank you for bearing with me during a very difficult time of my life, or should that be afterlife? [Laughter from the crowd.] It means a lot to me to have the support of the most discerning fans in the world! [Pop!] And another thank you must go to you, Nightwing. Your continued friendship and support has helped me more than I can adequately express. You watered the acorn that was my self-esteem, and it is growing steadily into a mighty oak just as you said it would. You had belief in me when I believed in nothing and no-one, and you helped me when I couldn't -- no, wouldn't -- help myself. Your teachings made me realise that I could never honour the memory of my father whilst I had no self-respect, and for that I owe you a debt of gratitude... but I fear my thanks fall on deaf ears. I have spent the last weeks on a journey of self-discovery and coming to terms with my loss, only to return to find a friend as tormented as I was. Nightwing, friend, you follow the path of self-destruction, the same path I followed myself... so I repeat a lesson you gave me some months back: "You cannot help others before first helping yourself." Accept that you are the last Cherokee and live as your ancestors would have you live, with honour and pride. Lead your brothers and sisters down the path of enlightenment by example and they will return. Until then, show your fans and me what being "the last Cherokee" means, and fight with honour befitting your station. [The crowd cheers in approval as Highwayman drops the microphone and goes to his corner to retrieve his canvas bag. Standing by the ropes, he looks into the bag, and then points out into the crowd, who begin to clamour and wave. Highwayman pulls out a clutch of official Highwayman merchandise -- cap pistols and foam three-pointed hats -- and throws them out into the crowd, where they are swallowed up by eager hands. Highwayman throws merchandise into the crowd from each side of the ring before bowing out and heading back up the aisle to a big pop. Cut back to the studio.] [WINNER: Highwayman by pinfall in 3:56.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= "Lone Wolf" Brody Thunder vs. Bobby B. Goode 267lbs, 6'2" 240lbs, 6'1" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Despite being recognised as possibly the toughest hombre in the IIWF, Brody Thunder's win/loss record has taken as much of a beating as his opponents in recent weeks. A brace of straight losses -- courtesy of Billy Shakespeare and Mad Dog Watkins -- have seen his stock in the rankings drop somewhat, but the ornery Texan isn't deterred by such statistics. Having declared his intentions not only to capture gold in the IIWF but also to defeat anybody who stands above him in the rankings, Thunder got a welcome taste of victory tonight, with his Syndicate cohorts nowhere in sight -- although one Mad Dog Watkins, who has challenged Thunder to another battle in the bid to settle the series which currently stands at one apiece, watched from the aisle. And Thunder certainly put on a show for his veteran rival, blasting Goode with all manner of power moves, including some of his favourite suplexes. It's possible that, of the heavyweights in the IIWF, Thunder is the master of the myriad suplexes in the wrestling textbook -- and he performed textbook executions of the Northern Lights, Fisherman's, slingshot and brainbuster varieties in the ring tonight, each time punctuating the assault with a finger pointed firmly at the Mad Dog in the aisle. Ultimately, it was the combination of a lethal Cattle Buster DDT and a Thunderbolt that put Goode down for the three count, but Thunder could have ended it at any time. After the match, Watkins applauded Thunder's performance, and disappeared back into the locker room area, leaving the Tombstone native to collect his leather strap and finger it purposefully in the ring. There's a great deal of respect between these two competitors, but respect could well go right out of the window when they meet at Birthday Bash on May 10. [WINNER: Brody Thunder by pinfall in 4:44.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= DARK DISCIPLES vs. THE ROTUNDOS Kane & Wulf Rotundo #1 & Rotundo #2 comb. 615lbs comb. 845lbs =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Like wild animals uncaged, the Dark Disciples decimated the Rotundos in very short order tonight. Unleashing fury hitherto unseen and unknown, even by the Disciples' standards, Don McQueen's huge charges went to the ring with one dictum in mind: maim, kill and destroy. A fine contest of technical wrestling this wasn't. The referee struggled to control the encounter, and most of the time, both Kane and Wulf were in the ring together, exacting their unique double-team brutality on the hapless Rotundos. Finally, the carnage was ended by the devastating Darkmoon Deathdrop, but McQueen almost had to drag the monstrous Disciples out of the ring by their hair to keep them from putting the Rotundos in the hospital. [WINNERS: Dark Disciples by pinfall in 7:13.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= ZODIAC CONNECTION vs. BARNACLE BROTHERS Scorpio & Taurus Bluto & Seadog comb. 575lbs comb. 569lbs =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Scorpio and Taurus have been neither seen nor heard of since their controversial defeat at the hands of Pain Inc. at Ring Wars III. They live and learn, however, and moved to prevent similar attacks in future by adding a bodyguard, who must have weighed in at some 290lbs and stands around 6'7" tall, to their entourage of the beautiful Gemini twins. As a side note, the IIWF President is said to be investigating the ease with which it seems many non-wrestling personnel are able to get manager's passes for ringside appearances -- he is said to be concerned by the increase in the number of brawls seen in and around the ring between those who simply should not even be there. We expect an announcement from the front offices in the next few days concerning this matter. In any case, the Zodiacs' measures were not in vain. Who should saunter down to ringside during the match to gloat over the capturing of the World Tag Team Championships -- once worn by the Zodiacs -- but long-time enemies, Pain Inc., who seemed determined to rub salt into the wounds of the star-gazers. Of course, Pain Inc. were accompanied by the other half of Team Brutality, Night Patrol, along with their manager, Brenda Hawkings, who, despite a change in wardrobe -- gone are the power-dressing suits, replaced by casual bomber jacket, jeans and a t-shirt -- seems to have fully recovered from her ordeal last weekend at the hands of the Dark Disciples. Undeterred, the Zodiacs wrestled the Barnacle Brothers, but were robbed of a clean victory when Pain Inc. interfered, causing an immediate disqualification. A brawl immediately ensued and things looked to be out of control, but Night Patrol remained aloof, apparently not wanting to get involved in the dispute. Mr. Mic shouted exhortations at the former police officers to join the fray, and the former United States Tag Team Champions eventually obliged -- but in a way which will shock the world! To a huge crowd reaction, Night Patrol performed the Police Brutality not on one of the Zodiacs -- but on Morningstar! Night Patrol turned on their Team Brutality stablemates and assisted the Zodiac Connection in beating Pain Inc. out of the arena! Later on, Night Patrol returned to the ring to explain their actions, and reveal their intentions. Let's roll that footage now: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier Tonight". The ring is clear following a match, when suddenly the "Dragnet" theme kicks in over the PA. There is a large mixed reaction from the crowd as Night Patrol appear in the aisle, accompanied by their manager, Brenda Hawkings, still dressed in the rather uncongruous bomber jacket, jeans and Night Patrol t-shirt.] LM: Here comes the Night Patrol, apparently to explain their actions earlier tonight to the crowd. SR: Yeah, they've got a _lot_ of explaining to do, especially after stabbing the world champs in the back. [Lt. Keene jaws positively with the fans heading up the aisle, while Asst. D.A. Hawkings and Sgt. Blazer are all smug grins as they enter the ring to a growing face pop. Hawkings grabs the mic as Keene and Blazer raise their arms to a bigger pop. Brenda eventually hushes the crowd.] BH: Fans of the IIWF... [pop!] We feel we owe you a big apology. When my officers and I joined this great organization, we saw a tough road to climb. The tag team action in the IIWF is the best in the world. We knew we had to deal with the teams that stood in our way, and to do that, we, in our inexperience, saddled up with Pain Inc. [heel pop!] SR: [over the headset] ...the best move you ever made, too, sister... [Keene takes the mic] DK: So what's the first thing they want us to do? Cheap shot the Zodiacs! Tim Dross, I know you're watching, you were right about Pain Inc. and Mr. Mic. Why, during our U.S. Title match, all they said to us that week was, "Please, officers... Brenda, let's just have a coin toss so your officers don't hurt my boys. You can have the titles if you win... we just want to get out alive." BH: On the way we beat Cold Spell and the Prophets of Rage in the tournament. We even sent the Arabian Felons out of the IIWF for good! [big pop!] After we won the titles, Cold Spell didn't cheap shot us, but the Prophets did. In fact, the Harlequins helped us win, if you look at the record. DK: So we thought, hey, they got close and they're pretty tough... let's take them on and give 'em a shot. We thought for sure the Zodiacs or Cold Spell would try to mess us up... but they didn't. And The Harlequins gave us a helluva fight [pop]. BH: And those grimy Satanists, the Syndicate, committed yet another felony: kidnapping. Dark Disciples, trying to endanger a woman is a serious mistake, altough I don't suppose I was in any real danger... I was scared as they dragged me back there, afraid of what they might have done. But what happened looked a lot more like "The Crying Game" than anything else. [Whoops and cheers from the crowd!] LM: [over the headset, laughing] Oh my goodness... DK: In short, fans, we said we were here to establish a little law and a little order here in the IIWF. And we're gonna make good on that promise to you the, fans! [huge face pop!] SR: [over the headset] I'm gonna throw up... JB: You see, we lost sight of what was good... Cops sometimes bend the rules, like all people, but that doesn't make it all right. To all the rulebreakers in the IIWF, take my advice... [The crowd responds with the end of Sgt. Blazer's catch line:] CROWD: AND DON'T SHOW UP! [Huge pop as the Patrol high five one another in the ring, then Hawkings reclaims the mic as the three begin to leave.] BH: Oh, and Mr. Roberts... You might want to know there's a Denver Boot on your car outside. You see, those old traffic violations showed back up on the computer the other day... dumb luck, that. [The three leaves to huge cheers, Keene tagging hands.] SR: [over the headset] Uh, uh... A Denver Boot? Now I'm really sick... [Cut back to the studio.] TD: Fans, I'll be keeping my eyes on Night Patrol very closely in the coming days, and I'm sure that the World Tag Team Champions will have some words for their former partners. [WINNERS: Zodiac Connection by disqualification in 5:35.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Derek Mota vs. The Hangman 224lbs, 5'10" 322lbs, 6'10" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: This was a big match for both men. Certain contractual difficulties had arisen, keeping the members of Hangmen Inc. out of action since Ring Wars III, but those disputes having been ironed out, tonight represented the first chance for all three men to get back into the ring -- and the Hangman's win/loss record has been rather shaky as of late. Let's hear from the Hangmen entourage now: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Yesterday." Judge Roy Bean, The Hangman, and the Hangmen are seen standing in front of the offices of Hangman Inc.] JRB: Well, boys, now that our contract squabbles with the IIWF are behind us, it is time to get it together again. You all have matches this Wednesday and I expect only the best from you all. TH: Derek Mota, I see you have been chosen to be the lamb going to slaughter this week. You think you can stand up to THE HANGMAN? Well, I don't think you can even imagine the pain and suffering that will happen when you step into the ring with me. I have traveled far and wide to debut a move that is going to stop your heart. Get ready to look into the face of death. I do not get my name from being easy on my opponents. I plan to make The Senator smile from his perch above the ring. HM#1: G.W.R., well, here we go. When my partner and I get a hold of you, the lights will go out. We are a World Class team. To take us lightly would be a great mistake on your part. With the training and advice that the Judge has bestowed on us, it only stands to reason that you are the first step to the top. HM#2: Listen... do you hear gasping sounds, G.W.R.? These sounds will be the last you hear before our hands are raised in victory. The sounds we hear will be the booing of the crowd as we pummel your unconscious bodies after the bell sounds. Let the fun begin. [The Judge and his three Hangmen get into their limo and it drives off towards the inter-state highway, heading for Portland, Oregon. Cut back to the studio.] TD: For Mota, on the other hand, tonight was his first chance to go up against a true IIWF veteran -- but what a mismatch. The Hangman weighs in at a whole one hundred pounds heavier than Mota, and stands a whole twelve inches taller. While Mota has the edge in speed and agility, the Hangman -- complete with his devastating new heart punch, arguably even more effective than Casey James' -- is the more powerful man. A real clash of styles, then -- and fans were expecting a great match. Mota, however, was a little preoccupied, at least at first. Expecting Randy Acorn to exact some measure of revenge after Mota's attack last week and brawl in the battle royal last Saturday, Mota eyed every face on his way to the ring with great suspicion, on guard in case any one of them proved to be the "Badboy" in disguise. Such was his jumpiness that he clobbered a ring attendant with a superkick as he neared the ring -- but the poor lackey was certainly no Randy Acorn, and had to be stretchered from the arena. Apparently shaken by his mistake, Mota seemed off-balance in the early going of the match, enabling the big Hangman to keep him grounded and wear him down with power moves. However, Mota demonstrated that while he can fly with the best of the cruiserweights, he is also possessed of a great deal of stamina and endurance, and rallied from every attack. Just how much endurance he possesses was clear as the match rumbled on -- the Hangman unable to string together enough high-impact offence to put Mota down for the three count, and Mota unable to get enough power behind his high-flying moves to topple the Hangman and turn the tide conclusively in his favour. The bell rang at the twenty minute mark, the match ending in a time-limit draw, but the crowd had gained respect for Mota. The Hangman, however, wasn't so impressed, and in a fit of frustration, hit Mota with his heart punch. The plucky Canadian went down, but was able to walk from the ring with the help of the official, which he resisted. He may be the smallest man competing in the IIWF, but Mota has some tremendous energy reserves. He's going to be one to watch, folks. [Match declared a time-limit draw.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= THE HANGMEN vs. G.W.R. Hangman #1 & Hangman #2 Loco & Spoiler comb. 715lbs comb. 545lbs =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: The fortunes of the railway-inspired partnership of Loco and Spoiler have certainly taken a downward turn in the last couple of months. Only last week they took a loss at the hands of newcomers, the W & W Express, and this week, they fell to the veteran partnership of the Hangmen. Loco and Spolier looked decidedly lacklustre in the ring, their timing off and their desire apparently gone. After falling to the Hangman's Noose tonight, it begs the question: is this the end of the line for G.W.R.? [WINNERS: the Hangmen by submission in 12:42.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= W & W EXPRESS vs. COLD SPELL Clark Watson & Doug Wayne Icehawk & Edmund Fitzgerald comb. 500lbs comb. 500lbs =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Rumours have continued to fly over the past few days concerning the possible blossoming of a romance between Icehawk of Cold Spell and Harlequin Comedy, valet of the new United States Tag Team Champions, the Harlequins. However, events in this match should put those rumours to rest -- Larry even reported that Comedy had been "warming" to Icehawk. We were to find out just what that meant. The match started off fast-paced, with Icehawk characteristically demanding to start things off for his team -- and he seemed to be going all out to impress, almost taking the Express too lightly, which proved to be a mistake, as Watson and Wayne targeted the young Fin's legs in an effort to ground him and neutralise that aerial assault. Icehawk eventually made the tag out to Fitz, and the big man hit the ring like a house of fire, working over the smaller men with gusto. At this point, with Icehawk on the apron, who should come down to ringside but Harlequin Comedy... and she attracted Icehawk's attention with a smouldering "come hither" gaze -- but that smoulder soon exploded as she unleashed a fireball towards the unsuspecting Fin's face! Icehawk, his reactions as quick as ever, managed to duck out of the way, the flames merely singeing his hair, but the ex-gymnast was truly shocked as Comedy ran from the ringside area, laughing maniacally. Fitz immediately went to the aid of his partner, and Cold Spell ended up getting counted out as Icehawk took off up the aisle after Comedy in a fit of rage, Fitz trying to hold him back. This result, while bound to further infuriate Edmund Fitzgerald, who is sick and tired of seeing Cold Spell's path to the top blocked by constant outside interference, evens the score between these two teams, who met back in February. Last time, Cold Spell came out on top when the W & W Express clobbered Fitz with a set of brass knuckles. Perhaps these two teams will clash one more time in the future to settle the scores once and for all. [WINNERS: W & W Express by countout in 17:44.] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Nightwing vs. Tiger Claw 235lbs, 6'3" 220lbs, 6'2" =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= TD: Having popped up earlier in the evening, both in person and in the comments of the Highwayman, finally Nightwing took himself back into the ring, facing his toughest opponent to date in the form of former three-time Intercontinental Champion, Tiger Claw. Watched by not only his eagle friend and spirit guide, Chiquoit, but also by the eagle eyes of the Highwayman, Nightwing once again entered the wolves' den that is the Syndicate's domain. However, unlike their last encounter on Saturday Night, when Nightwing simply walked into the locker room of the Syndicate and allowed them to beat him within an inch of his life, tonight Nightwing was determined not to go down without a fight, and although the ringside entourage of Brian Lau, Brody Thunder and Casey James gave Nightwing plenty to worry about, the young Native American was truly focused on the match at hand. Although Nightwing only outweighs Tiger Claw by some fifteen pounds, the styles of the two men are quite distant -- Nightwing is an aerialist, Tiger Claw a martial artist -- but the athletes seemed to agree on the common ground of out-and-out brawling, which is what this at first athletic encounter soon degenerated into. The match spilled outside the ring, inviting Thunder and James to take potshots at Nightwing while Lau distracted the official, and this drew Highwayman out of the locker room, where he had been watching the match on the monitor. The combined assistance of Highwayman, and a swooping Chiquoit, who divebombed the Syndicate from the rafters of the arena, enabled Nightwing to slip back into the ring and beat the referee's count, although the ringing of the bell did little to cool the tempers of the Syndicate. The brawl continued until security descended on the area to pull the warring factions apart. [WINNER: Nightwing by countout in 14:28.] TD: Well, folks, that just about wraps it up for tonight. Of course, there's plenty more action coming your way this weekend as the premier wrestling show in the world today, IIWF Saturday Night, blasts off yet again, with a tremendous line-up, including Dirt Dog Unique Allah challenging Chris Quigley. Let's hear from the Dirt Dog now: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier This Week." Dirt Dog Unique Allah sits with a globe between his legs, spinning it aimlessly and searching over the map. Medusa sits next to him, studying it intently.] MR: There! [She points to a spot on the globe.] Told you so. DDUA: Cornerbrook, new Found Land. It don't look that new to me. MR: Believe me, Unique, I've been there. You'd rather lose it. UA: Well, something in Newfoundland's gonna be lost. And that's Chris Quigley's muhfuhing heart! Yeah, that's my word. You know, I've grown tired of that crybaby just whinin' and moanin' and screechin' and bellyachin'. Yeah, a'ight he won a few matches. He gotta little skills. Yeah, but there's one thing he ain't never gonna get. And that's a three count on the Dirty Doggy. Right, Medusa? MR: That's right, baby. You show him exactly what you're made of. UA: Oh, he gonna know. He gonna know! I can't let no Newfoundland muhfuh mess me up on TV. I'm sicka his face and I'm gonna bust it for him. Everybody know the Dog is the man to beat. Everybody know I'm the force of the IIWF. Everybody know that I'm the baddest doggie. Quigley, you's just a jealous muhfuh! And I don't like jealous muhfuhs! You gonna feel me tight on ya like a Trojan condom. I'ma wrap you up and squeeze you tight. You won't be able to breathe muhfuh! You won't be able to breathe! And I'm gonna bust ya! I'm gonna haunt ya, ya stoopid muhfuh! MR: Ooh, Unique. I like the sound of that. Yeah, I can see you beating on him, baby. Let me see it again! UA: BAM! MR: Oooooh! UA: BAM! BAM! MR: Oooooh-woooohhh! Don't stop, Unique! Don't stop! Keep beating it! Keep beating it! UA: Aw, Medusa! You gettin' me all hot, girl! Where the ill na na at? Where it at? YEAAHHHHH! [Cut back to the studio.] TD: Other incredible matches coming your way include a Towel Match to finally settle the score between Ronnie Paris and Luke Steele, Brody Thunder battling Marty Warnett, Requiem facing Nightwing, newcomers Ike Sampson and Duncan Macbeth duking it out, and much, much more. Don't miss one second of the action. But for now, on behalf of the broadcast team, this is Tim Dross, thanking you for watching, and saying: so long, everybody! [The lights in the studio drop and the video wall fades to blackness as Dross resumes shuffling his papers. Fade.] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Steve Owens | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | sowens@admin.presby.edu | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | IIWFadmin@aol.com | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+