##### ###### ### ########## ########## ########## #### ## ########## ########## ########## #### # #### ######## ##### ##### #### ## ##### #### #### #### #### ### #### #### #### #### ############# ######### #### #### ########### ######### #### #### #### #### #### ######### ######### ### #### #### ######### ######### ### ## #### ######## ######## ## # #### =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-= H + O + T + L + I + N + E #1-900-325-IIWF =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= 1 June 1997 ----------------------------------------------- [click] --------------------------- OPTION #1: The Dross Report --------------------------- Howdy, folks, and thanks for calling the IIWF Hotline. You've reached the Dross Report update for June 1, 1997, and I'm coming to you from the IIWF Express tour bus as we head towards the Four Corners National Monument at the point where Arizona, New Mexico, Utah and Colorado meet. We'll be holding our midweek card right there at the monument on Wednesday, and I just hope Nils doesn't get lost between here and there. What action we saw last night in the Cow Palace in San Francisco. The IIWF rocked the Bay area with a show which featured some fine wrestling, even by the historic standards of that venerable building. Twelve thousand fans were on hand to witness the crowning of a new Cruiserweight Champion in Dirt Dog Unique Allah, and see the homecoming of the red-gloved rookie, Creed, who announced that he plans to return to the ring in time for next Saturday Night's show, which will emanate from the Olympic Stadium in Juarez, Mexico. But let's first talk about that huge IIWF World Heavyweight Championship match between Casey James and Brody Thunder. Perhaps it was no surprise to find that the massed forces of the Syndicate would do everything in their power to prevent "Blackheart" from losing that title, but I believe that it truly was a surprise to Lau's men when Thunder burst out of the locker room area, badly beaten but as determined as ever to defeat his former boss for the title which he has coveted for so long. Thunder even managed to hit James with that devastating Cattle Buster DDT, learned from IIWF Hall of Famer, the "Outlaw" J.W. Hardin. It looked to be all over, but the Syndicate poured into the ring to save James' title, and things looked terrible for Thunder, until the dark destroyer, Deathbringer, appeared out of nowhere and singlehandedly cleared the ring of the Syndicate. Speculation is mounting concerning exactly what Deathbringer might be up to. It's no surprise that Deathbringer doesn't have too many allies in the locker room, and he travels alone to IIWF events, but more than a few backroom sources are suggesting that a number of superstars may be looking to Deathbringer to take a stand against the burgeoning forces of Genesis. Requiem maintains that the business between him and Deathbringer is over -- unless the man from the dark side chooses to make it not over. If Requiem really believes that Deathbringer is going to let that brutal assault, he's got another thing coming. I don't know when the next confrontation between these two will happen, but I do know that when it does happen, it won't be pretty. But back to the World title situation. I understand from the front office that the date will soon be fixed for a rematch between James and Thunder, and it may well be scheduled for the week after their commitments in the NLWP "Longest Road" event are over with. You'll remember that a couple of weeks ago, such IIWF stars as Casey James, Brody Thunder and Edmund Fitzgerald of Cold Spell, won through in the twenty man battle royal to earn shots at the NLWP World Heavyweight Champion. As I understand it, Casey James will be first to challenge for the title, and if he should be successful, the next week, he will meet Thunder himself in his first defence. Should Thunder be able to surmount the odds of the Syndicate and defeat James in the NLWP, that will be a major confidence boost for the cowboy, and a severe setback for James. Should James, however, keep Thunder at bay, one has to wonder whether just one man, even a tough S.O.B. like Brody Thunder, can topple the Syndicate. Another match that was marred by outside interference last night was the tag encounter between Cold Spell and the Harlequins. Cold Spell, along with Genesis, administered a "punking" on the 'Quins, which had them seething backstage afterwards. I understand that Poutine Janois had a hard time preventing them from coming out into the arena and interfering in every other match on the card -- and he failed to hold Chaos back when he ran down to the ring at the culmination of the battle for the Cruiserweight Championship between the Dirt Dog and Ronnie Paris to attack Medusa with a brutal chokeslam. Locker room sources are saying that Harlequin Tragedy is not at all happy in the IIWF at the moment, and is demanding main event marquee matches with both the Intercontinental and Cruiserweight champions. Tragedy's discontent is not said to sit well with volatile Acting IIWF President Steve Owens, who reportedly commented that if Tragedy is to achieve main event status, as he had in the early part of his IIWF tenure, before tagging up with young brother Chaos, he will have to prove himself. I understand that VP Owens has sanctioned a Four Corners tag team match for this Wednesday's event pitting the Harlequins, the W & W Express, Violence Unlimited and Cold Spell against one another for a shot at the World Tag Team belts, currently worn by the Prophets of Rage. A victory for the Harlequins in this match would certainly go some way towards restoring the front office's confidence in Tragedy and his entourage. The bizarre "Sychosys" Joe Petrow continues to send shockwaves throughout the IIWF, and particularly so after his strange tactics last night against the Subway Psycho. Petrow refused to strike the Psycho, and appeared to be using some kind of non-violent resistance against the Psycho's attacks. Eventually, he locked the Psycho in an unbreakable hold outside the ring, and the match ended in a double countout. I can safely say that I have not seen such a strange encounter in my entire career around the rings -- and the incident following the match in which poor Majestic Maurice McArthur was carried away by the Sychopaths -- in what amounts to a kidnapping, I might add -- promises some even more wacky repercussions in the weeks to come. Quite when Petrow will be satisfied remains to be seen. Last night also saw the return to the ring of the "Showstopper" Simon Lebec, who defeated El Super Gecko whilst blind drunk. The presence of Chris Quigley at ringside seemed to sober Lebec up sufficiently to demand that his old enemy be his guest on next week's "The Final Cut". Officials were said to be highly displeased with the negative message sent out by his antics. Nonetheless, Lebec will have Quigley on the segment next Saturday Night, and given the history between these two individuals, that's one interview I wouldn't want to miss. The disruption in the front office shows no signs of abating, with all manner of production difficulties plaguing the weekly shows. IIWF officials are blaming the disruptions on techincal problems encountered by making the IIWF's operation mobile once more. The IIWF's President, Dan Spreadbury, who continues to watch the IIWF's progress from the sidelines while he convalesces from his injury, is rumoured to be unhappy with the current problems, and may be considering returning to his duties sooner than expected. Well, fans, that's about it for this week's Dross Report. Don't forget to tune in for another week of outstanding IIWF programming coming your way over the next seven days, and I'll be right back at you next Sunday night with more backstage rumours and news, so don't forget to call again. Until then, this is Tim Dross, saying: so long, and thanks for calling! ----------------------- OPTION #2: Can We Talk? ----------------------- Hi there, everybody. I'm Larry Morton, and as usual, I've been trailing the IIWF superstars over the past week to get their thoughts on a topical question. This week's poser: WHAT'S THE TOUGHEST PART OF BEING AN IIWF SUPERSTAR? LORD BYRON: "Quite simple.  The hardest part is having to cope with the attention that comes from being champion.  It's tough at the top. [Byron sneers] As a few of my more recent opponents have found out, to their lasting cost." VIOLENCE UNLIMITED: Mutilator: The toughest part about being an IIWF Superstar would HAVE to be watching those corny little runts the Cold Spell getting chances at stuff they don't even deserve.  I mean we've already beaten on them, why don't they just step out of the way?  Oh well, we'll beat on them some more and THROW them out of the way, because that's what's next... beating them till they can't move. Jaguar: The toughest part, in reality, though, is listening to the announcers. Ouch, that stuff's PAINFUL... and we all know Violence Unlimited is the master of teaching the meaning... Mutilator: ...of _pain_. RISING SUN REVOLUTION: Ryudo: It's coping with the ups and downs.  We've all had our fair share of success, but it's coping with the hard times as well that's the true test of character. [Hiroshi's Japanese voice can be hear shouting in the background] Yes, I almost forgot.  The Alphabet Boys' attentions weren't a picnic, either. MARTY WARNETT: "Coping with so many fevered egos... but bursting them is probably the best part." MR. MIC, manager of PAIN INC.: "The toughest part is deciding on whose career to end next!" NIGHTWING: "I should begin by saying that I do not consider myself a "superstar".  If I enjoy any success in the ring, it is only proper to let others speak of it. Such is the sign of a honorable warrior. The only _difficult_ part of being in the IIWF is preparing yourself to be physically and spiritually ready for a new challenge every night.  The Great Phoenix Spirit guides me ever toward a greater path in the IIWF.  Together with Genesis, we shall be unstoppable." THE SYNDICATE: Tiger Claw: Having to answer these stupid [BLEEP]ing questions week after week. Casey James: Having to keep up with all the women that knock on my door every night... You know, the whole time everyone was worried that I was going to get beat by Quigley, there was this one chick that let me... What? Awww, come on! Brian Lau: Having to accept those huge paycheques at the end of every week... Oh, woe is me! "SHOWSTOPPER" SIMON LEBEC: "Definitely lack of privacy.  When I'm back home in Hollywood, it seems like I can't even take a leak without crazed chicks peeping in my windows, hanging out on the street... whatever.  Sometimes, it's tough being me." THE HARLEQUINS: Tragedy: Having to put up with all of the scrubs and prelim bums when you should be in the Main Event. Comedy: That and the cheese they use on the nachos at the Coliseum isn't spicy enough! I swear they just nuke a Kraft Singles slice on the chips and just hand it to you! Sheesh! THE HANGMAN: "Some would think that the training or maybe the lack of time to partake in one's favorite pastimes or even having to compete here in the IIWF is tough. The hardest time for myself and the rest of Hangman Inc. is having to put up with the crying, whiney competitors and front office staff here in the IIWF. You seldom hear anyone saying that this is the greatest Federation in the World, and just to be a part of it is the toughest thing one can do. Living up to the standards that have made us all rise to greatness is about the hardest thing we can do. Ask the ones who are not here anymore." "QUICKSTRIKE" CHRIS QUIGLEY: "The backstabbing.  The feeling of being wanted dead or alive.  Everyone was quick to jump all over me when I was down, and now that I'm back up?  Maybe it's payback time..." TONY STARKS: "This ain't got nothin' on the difficulty level of my old street fightin' jobs." SCOTT ROGERS: "You know, joining the IIWF was the greatest move I've ever made, but having to travel the country, and the world on occasion, is not too pleasant. Every night is spent in a hotel room and every day on a plane. It sure makes you appreciate home when you get a week off every six months." "DANGEROUS" DANNY DYNAMITE: "Toughest part of being a IIWF star? Well, let's see, trying to find competition that can somehwat compare to my talents is real tough. And getting that kiss-ass Petrow in the ring... but when that happens, the only thing tough is gonna be the ass whipping I lay on him!" IKE SAMPSON: "Fightin' off the ladies.  Whew! And listening to that idiot Roberts' stinkin' piehole..." MR. DAMAGE: "The hardest thing about being an IIWF superstar is stepping into the ring and looking toward my opponent in the other corner, I see the fear in his eyes, just how scared he is 'cos he knows he is about to get a bad ass whippin'. [fake cry] It breaks me up every time." REQUIEM: "The toughest part of being an IIWF Superstar? Listening to Steve "Soundbite" Roberts on the IIWF broadcasts. Perhaps the IIWF technicians should install a mute button? I'm sure that this is one thing that Tim Dross and I can agree on..." "LONE WOLF" BRODY THUNDER: "It's listenin' ta all o' these so-called superstars whine an' cry everytime somethin' don't go their way. My advice ta them is ta put up or shut up. Plain an' simple. This ain't no daycare. This is professional wrestlin'. If ya can't handle it... ya better find another line o' work... an' fast." [click] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Jim Jividen | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | brokeback@webtv.net | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+