[Computer simulated graphics of baseball players.  The ball players leisurely conduct their game, throwing, batting catching.  Suddenly, from the dugout, pour simulacrons of IIWF wrestlers:  Brody Thunder, Otto Verhoevan, Mr. Damage, Pain Inc., The wreslers seize bats and begin to assault the baseballers.   There is heard the whistle of a falling bomb and the sceen explodes into a mushroom cloud of flame, from which spins a familiar graphic:]               #####      ######     ###           ##########              ########## ########## ####       ##  ##########              ########## ########## ####  #   #### ########                #####      #####    #### ##  ##### ####                 ####       ####    #### ### ####  ####                 ####       ####    ############# #########                 ####       ####     ########### #########                 ####       ####     ####  ####   ####              #########  #########   ###   ####   ####              #########  #########   ###    ##    ####               ########   ########   ##      #    ####              =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-=                            W E D N E S D A Y                /////////          +            \\\\\\\\\                            W A R     R O O M              =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=                       * LIVE! * from Jacob's Field                             Cleveland, Ohio              --------------- 25 June 1997 ------------------ [A blimp shot shows Jacob's Field, Lake Eire shimmering just at the edge of the picture.  The big lights flood the baseball park.  Slowly the camera decends into the empty Stadium, coming ever closer to reveal a single temporary broadcast table located along the third base line.  A quick cut reveals Larry Morton, topped with a "Cleveland Indians" cap, and Becky LaRue.] LM: Welcome to The War Room... and Jacob's Field in Cleveland, Ohio! BL: Cleveland.  I can't believe they made us go to Cleveland. LM: Nonsense, this city has plenty to offer.  The Rock and Roll Hall of     Fame for example. BL: I'm sure Marty Warnett is giddy with glee.  Sorry, Larry, I'm not     convinced.  They lost the Browns football team, they lost Albert Bell. In fact, Albert was telling me the other day that... LM: _YOU_ know baseball slugger Albert Bell? BL: Honey, The moment he signed that 40 million dollar contract he became good friends with Becky. LM: Um, yes... well... BL: And what is with this IIWF tie in with another sport?  When is it     going to end?  Next thing you know, Dennis Rodman or Kevin Greene will be wrestling. LM: That will be the day.  But you seem a bit more irritable today, Becky. BL: Cleveland has that affect on a person.  But moreso, I'm angry over     Saturday's title bout.  I stood to have at least one of my favorite     wrestlers wearing the belt, and neither are.  What is with that? LM: I'm sure that both men will be back. BL: A couple bowls of cruchberries and Big Bad Brody will be back.  But     I've learned that Brian Lau has a new man lined up to join the     Syndicate.  It's very hush-hush. LM: Do tell.  I've heard nothing about this. BL: That's because no one talks to you, Larry.  His name is "The Mariner." He carries an albatross into the ring with him... chants "wrestlers, wrestlers everywhere..."  LM: Again, you continue to baffle me. BL: Nothing makes sense on the Coronation Clash Crusade Tour. LM: You KNOW that isn't he official motto of the tour. BL: Just start the recap, corporate boy. LM: Just hours ago a wrestling ring was set up in the middle of the "Jake by the Lake" and some 20,000 fans saw the debut of a number of     cross-over wrestlers... BL: Did you say "Cross-dressing wrestlers"? LM: No. Cross-over. BL: I thought maybe we were witnessing the return of Moondust or Bobby     Lin... LM: [Interupting]  Before the first match began, Marty Warnett took a seat ringside.   He carried with him a notebook and a stack of "Superstars of Wresting" trading cards.  Looks like he wanted to scout out his competition for that title tournament which begins Saturday. BL: Maybe he was looking for a date for tonight?  With that new haircut,     he'll need all the help he can get. LM: The IIWF regrets the actions of Simon Lebec last Saturday.  Almost     makes me nostalgic for the *cough* impartial reporting of Larue's Lair. BL: What do a batter with three strikes against him and Marty Warnett     have in common? [Larry is baffled, continually looking off camera for some form of help.] BL: They both have no balls on them!  Hehehehe... snort! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Kevin "the Cavalier" Christiansen vs. "Nifty" Ned Norton ------------------------------------------------------------------------     Christiansen seized the crowd from the beginning, entering the     ballfield on the back of a large white horse.  The crowd popped when     they noticed the Cleveland Cavaliers basketball team jersey he wore.     He dismounted and skinned off the jersey, offered his hand to "Nifty", and the two shook hands.  From there he was all business, Kevin putting away his valiant opponant with a side suplex, a second rope clothesline and a thundering powerslam before executing the "Broadsword" spinebuster, followed by a rollover bridge for the three count. RESULT: Christiansen by pinfall. LM: An impressive victory for this new young addition to the IIWF. We'll     see him in the championship tourney on July 5 against the "Enigma." BL: And we'll see him out of the tourney on July 5 after facing the "Enigma." LM: I can't believe you.  The man has wrestled one match and already you     don't like him. BL: It's all those "Thee's" and "Thou's" he's spouting.  It's worse than     Billy Shakespeare... not quite as bad as Duncan MacMushmouth.  Maybe     we should lock them all in a room and not let them out until they     learn to speak right. LM: Are you done? BL: No. What is this?  Does IIWF now stand for "International _Illiterate_ Wrestling Federation"? LM: Now are you done? BL: And Chrisiansen hasn't tried to peek into my dressing room ONCE, not     ONCE, I tell you.  I think something is wrong with him. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ "Cowboy" Ken Curtis [NLWP] vs. Casey C. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ LM: We don't know much about this NLWP wrestler, lets take a look. [The screen goes black.  There is heard the whistle of a falling bomb and an explosion of flame.  The blast clears to reveal a photo of "Cowboy" Curtis and the accompanying profile:] "Cowboy" Ken Curtis ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Competes in: NLWP Height: 6'2" Weight: 250lbs. Manager/Valet: Sweet Thang Style: Curtis is proficient technically, from a strong NCAA background        at the University of Texas, but prefers power moves.  He is        becoming increasingly skilled at brawling. Finishing Hold: Texas Bulldog Profile: Ken Curtis has gone from one of the most popular wrestlers in          the NLWP to one of the most hated when he backstabbed Nicholas          Doom in an NLWP WORLD Heavyweight Title shot.  Curtis helped          Brody Thunder defeat Casey James for the NLWP Title on June          16th so it is unsure how the IIWF crowd will react to him.          Curtis is a no nonsense wrestler who is looking to "get it on"          with the best the IIWF has to offer. [Handler: Greg Roberts (ger1@osi.com)] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ["Cowboy" Ken Curtis stands in front of a row of lockers. He is dressed in black jeans and boots, a black leather vest over a white t-shirt, and a black cowboy hat pulled down over his eyes. A filter tipped cigarillo juts from his mouth. Sweet Thang, his attractive blond valet/manager, stands beside him, dressed in black jeans and a white George Jones t-shirt. Curtis takes the cigarillo from his mouth and addresses the camera:] CKC: Ever since I've been in the NLWP, all I've heard is how great the      IIWF is. Then y'all sent some of your best rasslers over ta compete      in the NLWP and ya know what? [Curtis chuckles to himself momentarily, then stares hard into the camera, his eyes wide and on fire.]      I ain't a damned bit impressed! So git ready, you quote-unquote      "IIWF superstars", 'cause when the Cowboy rides outta here, he's      plannin' on takin' about ten pounds o' gold with 'im! [Curtis shoves the cigarillo back into his mouth and grins at the camera as we fade to the night's action.]     Curtis received a mixed reaction, garnering cheers from the Brody     Thunder fans in attendance, and shouts from The Syndicate groupies.     Casey C tried his best to begin an "IIWF! IIWF!" chant, but it didn't amount to much as Curtis grabbed Casey before he could get into the ring, snap maring him over the ropes.  From there it was all the cowboy.  Forearm shots, hip tosses, arm lock takeovers, a shoulder breaker before wasting no time in throwing the young IIWFster against the ropes and dispatching him with his Texas Bulldog. RESULT: Curtis by pinfall. BL: [sighing dreamily] He's a cowboy. LM: Um, yes.  Well, um, well, Becky, are you drooling? BL: [completely in a dreamworld]  Brad Kinder... J.W. Hardin... Ken Curtis. LM: What about Sweet Thang? BL: Just another Texas-airhead-bimbo-beauty-queen-gold-digger. LM: I think she's kinda cute. BL: OOH!  Yuck!  Larry Morton in heat!  Oh, I feel so unclean! LM: "Cowboy" Curtis will be wrestling his tourney bout this Saturday     versus IIWF up-and-comer Duncan Macbeth. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Black Flagg [ESWP] vs. Scott "the Whine" Bloom ------------------------------------------------------------------------ LM: For some unexplained reason Black Flagg did not arrive at the stadium tonight, so this match was cancelled.  Scott Bloom did lodge a formal protest, but has ignored.  A valiant attempt was made to replace this match with Mexican midgetwonders Brody Thundercito against Mini Verhoeven, but a contract agreement could not be reached in time. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Firestarter [ESWP] vs. Barnacle Brother Bluto ------------------------------------------------------------------------ LM: We did have on hand the other ESWP entry, Firestarter. BL: Is it true that he is the White Pheonix in disguise? LM: No. BL: What does ESWP stand for anyways?  Extra Sweet Wrestling Promotion?     Exceeedingly Sweet?  Endangered Species? LM: We apologize for any offense Becky's comments may have caused. BL: No we don't. LM: Don't you remember that fiasco concerning the Summit?  We're on tender ground here.  BL: Send Cowboy Curtis around to my motel room and I'll apologize in     person. LM: He's not from the ESWP. BL: Pity.  Send him around anyways. LM: Let's take a look at this competitor. [Again the explosion and the flames with the photo and graphics:] Firestarter ~~~~~~~~~~~ Competes in: ESWP Height: 6'9" Weight: 299lbs Origin: London, England Theme Music: "Firestarter" by The Prodigy Orientation: Heel Five Favorite Moves: 1. jack-knife powerbomb                      2. Boston Crab                      3. spin wheel kick                      4. chokeslam                      5. kidney punch (set-up move) Finishing Move: The Burning Zone: a torture rack backbreaker Primary attributes: 1. Strength                     2. Cheating                     3. Brawling Profile: Current ESWP European Heavyweight Champion (defeated Lord          Byron) and ESWP European Tag Team Champion with The Fallen          Angel (defeated Flex and The Prince of Darkness). Won the ESWP          Sweepy Awards for Rookie of the Year, Most Hated and Match of          the Year. Held one of the longest winning streaks in the ESWP          unitl defeated by ESWP World Champion Rage at What The World Is          Watching III. Currently feuding with Black Flagg over who is          the meanest wrestler in the ESWP. He tends to use a lot of four          letter words in his interviews and holds a lot of contempt for          everyone. Currently leads the ESWP's largest stable "Death          Enterprises". [Handler: Michael Lawson (michaellawson@hotmail.com)] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Firestarter stands in the center of a wrestling ring holding two belts. The banners of the IIWF are hanging from the ceiling, and burning!] FS: So, this is the big, bad IIWF that everybody in the whole, wide,     [BLEEP]ing world is talking about! This is the place that sent such     pieces of [BLEEP] as Highwayman, Byron, Damage, What a load of     [BLEEP]ing crap! DO YOU REALLY THINK I'M IMPRESSED? IS THAT WHAT'S     GOING THROUGH YOUR [BLEEP]ING HEADS? You know that so-called great     champion Lord Byron? You know him? [He holds up the ESWP European Title.] FS: Who do you think I took this from? Who do you think I put in the     Burning Zone and MADE HIM BEG FOR MERCY? ME! That's [BLEEP]ing     who! You think you're the [BLEEP]ing [BLEEP] because a bunch of     wankers told you so. Well, here's the big [BLEEP]ing reality check     boys and girls! You are looking at the next IIWF World's     Heavyweight [BLEEP]ing Champion! I'm going to haul the best this     [BLEEP] poor excuse for a league has to offer onto the strongest     shoulders in wrestling, and send them all to the Burning Zone!     And no one... is going to stop me! HAHAHAHAHAHA! ["Firestarter" by The Prodigy plays as the scene fades out.]     This was a match of two big men, but Bluto couldn't keep up with the vicious and unbalanced Firestarter.  Despite his 299 pounds,     Firestarter was able to lift his frame for a spin wheel kick which     suprised and floored the sailor.  From there on the bout was entirely in the hands of the newcomer.  He hoisted Bluto into a jack-knife powerbomb, then when Bluto staggered back to his feet, he staggered him with a kidney punch followed by the "Burning Zone" torture rack backbreaker. RESULT: Firestarter by submission. LM: Another impressive competitor from another federation.  We'll see     him this Saturday when he meets an man who is equally unpredictable:     Derek Mota. BL: If we're not careful, these guys are going to band together, call     themselves "The Outsiders" and try to take over the IIWF.  LM: Oh, I think that is a little far-fetched.  It would take well over a     year for anything to happen in a scenario like that. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Kid Ego [NLWP] vs. El Super Gecko ------------------------------------------------------------------------ LM: Yet another new face here for the tourney. [The bomb, the explosion, the graphic:] Kid Ego ~~~~~~~ Competes in: NLWP Height: 6'1" Weight: 234lbs. Style:  Kid Ego uses a combination of high flying moves and technical        expertise to make him into a formidable opponent. Finishing Hold: Ego Trip Moonsault Profile: Kid Ego is a former NLWP WORLD Heavyweight Champion and a          multiple time NLWP TV Champion.  Ego is certainly one of the          most arrogant and egotistical wrestlers in recent memory.  He          is currently in a partnership with Derek Mota and Jared Jameson          as the Coalition in the NLWP. Ego sincerely thinks that he is          unbeatable and will go on to make up elaborate lies (which he          actually believes) when he loses.  Kid Ego ranked as one of the          most hated wrestlers in the world in the Snapshot 1997 Half          Year Awards.  Ego is a womanizer of the first order and is          always accompanied by the exotic Shauna and by Richard "Moxy"          Blue's ex-girlfriend "Molly". [Handler: Jamie Viens (jviens@ica.net)] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Camera opens in the IIWF dressing room.  A well-toned man is standing in the center of the room.  He is staring in the mirror and runs his fingers through his shoulder length dirty blonde hair.  Kid Ego turns to face the camera:] KE: Well, well.  The IIWF fans finally get to see a true wrestling     superstar.  I hear that the IIWF reps came begging on their hands     and knees to Commissioner Anderson of the NLWP. [Ego gets down on his knees and puts his hands up in a prayer like fashion.]     Please Mr. Anderson, can we have Kid Ego for our tournament? He is     the greatest wrestler in the world and we need him. [Ego gets back up and chuckles.]     Anderson came to me and I accepted the offer.  It’s time that the     IIWF fans see what wrestling is all about.  These poor IIWF saps are     going to get a lesson in wrestling.  No one can beat me because I am     the greatest wrestler ever. [Ego turns back and faces the mirror.]     El Super Gecko, the lizard man.  If you want to be a lizard that’s     fine by me.  I’d rather be a perfect human being.  Now the fans are     going to see how the Kid takes care of a Jobber that likes to hide     behind a mask.  MOLLY, LET’S GO, IT’S TIME! [Kid Ego slaps his hands together and a little redhead wearing a tight French maid outfit comes running in.]     When I say let’s go, I want you by my side in a split second.  Do     you hear me? MOLLY: Yes, Mr. Ego. KE: It takes a lot to become an Ego girl Molly.  Now let’s go. [Ego shoves Molly and they leave the dressing room.  Camera cuts to black.]     Kid Ego entered with a red-haired young valet dressed in a French     maid's outfit.  She carried a water bottle with her from which Ego     took a small sip, then promptly emptied on the ground.  Abusively, he sent her backstage for more water.   Ego then went around checking the tension of the ring ropes, calling over his opponent, El Super Gecko, to inspect them also.  When Gecko bent to see where The Kid pointed, Ego snapped the rope, smacking Gecko in the face.  From there an aerial show began, each wrestler trying to get the higher ground. The Gecko made the first mistake, flying off the ropes into a back lift which flung him over the ropes.  Kid Ego promptly executed a springboard suicide plancha to the outside which electrified the crowd.  Kid Ego dragged the Gecko back into the ring for his "Ego Trip" Moonsault. RESULT: Kid Ego by pinfall. LM: We'll see more of Kid Ego this Saturday against Brody Thunder.  These are two that don't match up well against each other at all.   As much as I dislike Mr. Thunder, the sooner Kid Ego is out of the     competition, the better. BL: Who made these tourney brackets anyways?  It's almost like Pres.     Dan's computer fell over and spat out all manner of results. LM: This leads us to our tag team bouts for the evening.  Similar to how     Warnett came ringside earlier, so too did new IIWF tag team, The     Machines. [Camera shot of Paul Wong and Simon O'Neal waving from ringside in street clothes.  Simon wears a  "SHOOT, SOUNDBITE! SHOOT" t-shirt.   Simon sees the camera, and holds up a sign reading "Hey Nightriders: WHERE'S KITT?"] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Nightriders vs. The Rotundos ------------------------------------------------------------------------     The 'Riders came ringside accompanied by J.P. Steele's valet and wife, Annie Steele. The Nightriders took it to the Rotundos, "Jackhammer" Steele mixing in powerslams, Brainbusters and superplexes.  His tag partner, Jimmy Hawk, confounded his big opponent with speed and flying clotheslines, handspring elbows and flying dropkicks.  Eventually the Rotundos fell prey to the "Deulin' Wipeout" as Steele landed the DDT and Hawk flew off the top rope with an elbow and the cover. RESULT: The Nightriders by pinfall. LM: What a relief, a new tag team for our dwindling ranks.  BL: But did it have to be "Jackhammer" Steele? I hoped we'd seen the last of him after Snow Brawl. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Harlequins vs. The Zodiac Connection ------------------------------------------------------------------------     From the opening bell, this match became a brawl. Tragedy started,     only to find himself opposite both Zodiacs.  Chaos came for the save     as he and Taurus fell to the outside.  The bell clanged continually,     but that didn't slow up the attack.  With Tragedy and Scorpio as the     legal men inside, Taurus and Chaos went toe-to-toe out side.  Taurus     resorted to whatever trash he could lay his hands on: paper cups, popcorn, a chair and Sparkplug Lee's microphone.  Chaos wouldn't go down until Taurus pulled a steel bar from under the ring, bringing it down heavily on the Harlequin.  Taurus tried to bring the bar into the ring where Tragedy had the upper hand, but the ref stopped him.  Taurus dropped the bar and powerslammed the referee.  That was quickly followed up with the "Zodiac Splash" as Scorpio broke free. Both men ran hurridly backstage, ignoring the sign The Machines waved in their faces reading, "THE ZODIACS WILL BE TORN TO PISCES!"     Acting President Steve Owens soon entered the ring, announcing that     the Zodiac Connection would be indefinitely suspended. RESULT: Harlequins by disqualification. LM: We quickly sent a camera backstage to get the Zodiac Connection's     comments on this ruling. [The Zodiac Connection, accompanied by the Gemini twins, are caught leaving the arena after the card, duffel bags over their shoulders. They address the camera:] TAURUS: Hey, do you think we are upset at the fact that you have         suspended us?! Actually, we are very thrilled about it because         it gives us an opportunity to do something fun... like going on         a world tour to promote our new rap album.  It's available at         stores everywhere, and it's called "Respect us Now... or Pay         Later!" SCORPIO: From the time we started in this federation we weren't          respected by anyone! And the fans laughed at us as well, so you          know what? We decided that we were going to have the last laugh          by doing a number on the Harlequins and going out to party!          Folks, when we return... I hope you all realize that we are          going to return... we hope to see a group of people who are          very willing to respect us! TAURUS: See you all real soon! [The Zodiacs leave the arena and head to their hired car. Fade.] BL: What was that you were saying about the tag team ranks? LM: I'm stunned and confused. BL: That's nothing new.  But what about the suspension? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Last Resort vs. Dark Disciples ------------------------------------------------------------------------ LM: The winner of this match is to face the winners of the Hollywood     Bloods/Pain Inc. battle at Coronation Clash. BL: And when are those matches, Larry? LM: Well, the Bloods/Pain match is July 2, Coronation Clash is July 12! BL: Let's see some video recorded earlier... [Scene: The Last Resort and there manager Mr Friday stand in the locker room getting ready for their upcoming matches with Dark Disciples. ] MF: It seems that everyone has been wondering what has happened to my     boys over the past few weeks. Well let me tell you this. Even though     they is 5 and 1, and the number 1 contenders, the manner of some of     their victories have been disappointing, so I took them away to a     private gym where they wouldn't be disturbed by all the media     attention. ED: Yes, we is much more focused as unit, and I am much looking forward     to our return match with the Dark Disciples; it was very good contest last time, I just hope that tonight's matchup will not be marred by interference by Pain Inc. MA: Hey, Pain in the Butt, we don't need none of your help to cut     these meatheads down to size, so just for once keep your noses out of everyone else's business! [Avenger does a few sloppy punches and kicks.] MA: And one other thing, this goes out to my brother who was in action     tonight, bro, why don't you just pack it all in? You ain't ever going to get it right. [Fade] [SCENE: Kane and Wulf of the Dark Disciples are lurking around somewhere in the bowels of Jacob's Field. Their reddened eyes peer malevolently out of the gloom.] KANE: As all the meek fools out there are no doubt aware of, Wulf and I       have weighty matters to deal with concerning our former "allies"       Casey James and Tiger Claw. However, we must put all of that       behind us this evening as we descend on the ring to dispose of the       Last Resort -- if only because it shall give us a chance to rip       chunks of flesh from the bodies of Pain Inc once again. That is,       if they can triumph over a pair of vagrant bums such as the       Hollywood Bloods; I suspect that even such a small task as that       will be too much for Hellraiser and Morningstar to accomplish       after the savaging we dished out to them last Saturday Night. WULF: Last Resort, it ails me considerably that a couple of physically       lacking insects such as yourselves hold a victory over us! You       must realise, of course, that your win was nothing but a fluke, a       pure act of fortune on your behalf; and that without Mr. Mic's       moronic minions busting Kane over the head with that chainmail       mask, you would still be cleaning your blood and entrails off the       canvas down in Mexico! It gives me great satisfaction to step into       the ring with a couple of jumping beans such as yourselves - what       fun! Jumping beans, they bounce around the ring, ever evading my       grasp, darting in and out like annoying stinging flies, making me       ever more frustrated and angry as the match wears on and then! --       SPLAT -- I finally catch hold of them and rend and tear and stomp       the little bugs into jelly! [demented cackle] KANE: [gives a chilling laugh] The charade is up, Last Resort. No longer       can your streak of fortune last. No longer can you disguise your       complete lack of competence. For you, the dream is already over. [Fade]     Last Resort won the hearts of the fans from the start when they     came ringside with a young boy, well known to the Cleveland fans as     fighting a valiant battle against cancer.  They brought him into     the ring, hoisting him on their shoulders to cheering, before sending him backstage.   On cue, The Machines waved a sign reading:  "YOU CAN CHECK OUT ANY TIME YOU LIKE, BUT YOU CAN NEVER LEAVE!"     The Disciples made this into a physical matchup, isolating El Diablo in their corner, wearing out the aged wrestler with brute force and illigal double teams.    On those ocasions when the Masked Avenger     tagged in, he made every attempt to slow the pace with submission     maneuvers, the Disciples countering with double teams of their own.  The deciding moment came when, with all four men in the ring, El Diablo was sent flying into the crowd by Wulf, leaving Masked Avenger open for the pin.  The Disciples were about to put the boot to the Avenger, but El Diablo pulled him from the ring, quickly escaping backstage. Shortly thereafter, Hellraiser of Pain Inc. came ringside -- only it proved to be Hades in costume as Pain Inc. suddenly appeared from under the ring, throwing Kane out of the ring, where Hades locked up with him.  The real Hellraiser dragged a table from under the ring, and while Mr. Mic kept Don McQueen busy, Pain Inc. attempted to suplex Wulf through the table.  They couldn't get the upper hand, however, and security rushed ringside to break up the battle. RESULT: Dark Disciples by pinfall. BL: Shame we are doing this tournament.  A show down between some of these tag teams will be a lot more interesting than Scott Rogers against Requiem. LM: We'll have plenty of tag action on the War Room.  But that's all we     have for tonight. BL: Finally, leaving Cleveland.  Next week COULDN'T be any worse. LM: Um, next week we're in New Jersey... BL: [sobs into her arms] [The camera begins to pull out.  Larry hold up a hastily scrawled sign reading, "I got to third base with Becky LaRue."  He points to where the broadcast table sits next to third base on the ball diamond to illustrate his point. Fade.] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Jim Jividen | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | brokeback@webtv.net | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+