[Air raid sirens split the silence.  A spotlight swirls, alternately revealing Tiger Claw, Billy Shakespeare, Marty Warnett, and Casey James among others dressed in camouflage.  The shot shifts to a model of the IIWF Towers, and to the familiar whistle of a falling bomb, the tower explodes into a pyrotechnic fireball.  Through the blaze appears the IIWF logo:]                 #####      ######   ###            ##########              ########## ########## ####       ##  ##########              ########## ########## ####  #   #### ########                #####      #####    #### ##  ##### ####                 ####       ####    #### ### ####  ####                 ####       ####    ############# #########                 ####       ####     ########### #########                 ####       ####     ####  ####   ####              #########  #########   ###   ####   ####              #########  #########   ###    ##    ####               ########   ########   ##      #    ####              =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- ## =-=-=-=              ///  W E D N E S D A Y  +  W A R   R O O M  \\\              =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=                   * LiVE! * from The IIWF Hall Of Fame                       IIWF Towers, Portland, Oregon              ----------------- 6 August 1997 ----------------- [The camera pans past glass cabinets housing items of IIWF past lore: A urine soaked American flag, A prosthetic fist, a foam kiwi, Spur's shredded mask.  In a clearing amoung these trophy cases sit Larry Morton and Becky LaRue.] LM: Welcome everyone to the War Room.  We'll be recapping the action     from house shows from Portland and surrounding areas.  Everthing is     back to normal around here.  I'd like to thank our subtitute producer who stepped in at the last moment and delivered and excellent show. BL: Yeah, more or less. He was a real stickler on cutting the banter we     open the show with. LM: Well, he was new. He didn't know we are supposed to get scripts. BL: Scripts? You use a script? LM: Well, yeah.  Doesn't everyone?  Don't you? BL: [Becky steals a sheaf of paper from in front of Larry.]  Let me see     this.  [Reading] "Welcome everyone to the War Room..."  "Hey Becky,     how about that new producer..."  "Hey Becky, that's a great dress"     Who writes this junk fo ryou?  It's worse than what Pheonix spouts. LM: I kinda thought it was good. BL: Moron. LM: That's MORTON. BL: Hey, Roberts, you make the call.  Morton... moron... same thing, right? LM: We have plenty of exciting and unexpected action tonight. BL: What?  Did Summer lose his virginity? LM: I kind of thought that would be a personal crusade for you. BL: Was that in the script? LM: Why, no.  I thought of that right off the cuff. BL: A smart man, a man who wants to walk again, a man who would have     a hard time eating without a tongue... would stick to his script. LM: [reading]  Let's... get... to... our... first... recap. BL; Good boy. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Licensed For Devastation vs. Barnacle Brothers ------------------------------------------------------------------------     Starr and Chaos looked like different men than those who have so far     to taste victory in the IIWF.  The crusty sailors were no match for     the inspired LFD.  Starr led off the match, delighting the crowd with a never ending succession of high flying maneuvers.  The crowd was solidly behind him and there was almost a groan of displeasure when he tagged in Chaos.  The unhappiness didn't last long as Chaos     resorted to his repertoire of power moves, slamming his helpless sailor foe into the mat continuously and from any number of different positions.  With the chant of "LFD! LFD!" in their ears, their "Breach of Contract" powerbomb-legdrop combination finisher for the pin. RESULT:  Licensed for Devestation by pinfall BL: About time.  I didn't think these guys would EVER get a victory. LM: I'm pretty sure that this one won't be their last. BL: Is that in your script? LM: Um, no. BL: You're gonna look pretty funny sucking Slim Slam through a straw     with no lips. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Dexter St. Croix [debut] vs. El Super Gecko ------------------------------------------------------------------------     St. Croix entered to the sounds of Bob Marley's "Exodus", and it     wasn't long before he too was leaving.  Dexter relied upon his     talent to deliver high impact attacks, especially his expertice in     suplexes.   El Gecko never got a chance to climb the ring ropes     before being caught in a belly-to-back or a belly-to-belly.  St.     Croix kept the match clean, occasionally mixing in open hand shots     and european uppercuts before finally finishing hios opponent off     with the "Natty Dread" Tilt-a-Whirl slam. RESULT: Dexter St. Croix by pinfall LM: Um... impressive debut for the newcomer. Um... I could see him     challenging for a belt soon. BL: More importantly, how long before he joins the exhaustive list of     stables here in the IIWF?  Is he "New Generation," "Black Pack," "Age of Rage," or "Genesis"? LM: Now Becky, not every wrestler in the IIWF is in a stable. BL: Hmmm, with "Exodus" as his theme, he ought to join Genesis and     Sebastion Jericho in a biblical sort of thing.  Call themselves     "Ten Commandments." LM: I see you're an equal opportunity offender. BL: "Thou shalt not give whatever St. Croix has been smoking in the     bathroom to Steve Roberts." ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Tonnage vs. Rotundo #1 ------------------------------------------------------------------------     The ring positively creaked as Rotundo #1 met the only man in the     IIWF bigger than he, the massive and awesome Tonnage.  But where     Rotundo is merely fat, Tonnage showed the agility of a man fully     a third his size.  It wasn't long before he was able to use his     destructive mass to its full.  Neither wrestler ever left the mat,     but Tonnage delivered a Belly-to-belly suplex which rocked the house     and quited the crowd.  Tonnage followed by lifting his beefy     opponant for a shuttering powerslam.  It was only academic when he     dragged Rotundo to his feet for the "Gigaton Crush" running splash. RESULT: Tonnage by pinfall LM: That is a lot of destructive force in that ring.  I understand that     this man brings a reputation as big as he is to the IIWF. BL: Do you realize that you could fit five of Steve Summer into this guy?  You could make a tent out of his underwear. LM: And I'm sure you'll try. BL: Last warning Morton:  the script. LM: Sorry. BL: I bet this guy's arm could win the cruiser belt all by itself. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Equalisers vs. Scott "the Whine" Bloom & Casey C. ------------------------------------------------------------------------     This was the debut for this new team, and their impromptu combination of opponents was no match for them.  Sampson and Parsons both used varied power and technical moves, moving freely in the ring before dropping "The Whine" with their finisher "The Incapacitator", a double team chop block to the legs. RESULT: Equalizers by pinfall LM: Again the tag ranks seem to be filling with quality competitors. BL: The guys at least got the job done on their first try.  More than I     can say for Liscensed for Destruction. LM: Are you trying to stir things up between those two teams? BL: Gee, am I being that obvious?  Hey, LFD, let's see you get a victory     over the EQs and I'll say something nice about you on the show. LM: Becky, you know booking isn't done like that. BL: I'm such a scamp. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ NON-TITLE:    Dirt Dog Unique Allah vs. "Majestic" Maurice McArthur ------------------------------------------------------------------------    Medusa Rage was the first to enter the ring, announcing that this was    "The Day of of the Age of Rage"  before taking the mic from Sparkplug and introducing Dirt Dog Unique Allah.  Next to appear was Simon Lebec who managed to step into the spotlight meant for Dirt Dog before taking a seat ringside.  McArthur, of course, came ringside    with Joe Petrow, both wrestlers identically clad in Team Sychosys wear. Dirt Dog was wary of Petrow at ringside, but at the bell he locked up with 3M, who did absolutely nothing to defend himself.  Unique Allah tossed McArthur around the ring like a rag doll before finally leaning over him, slapping his face and demanding that he fight like a man... or at least fight at all.  Cries began to rise form the Sychopaths that 3M was tanking the match, but Petrow did not seem alarmed.  3M took the opportunity to roll out of the ring, and once there, both he and Petrow rolled underr the ring, emerging moments later, both masked. Immediately the masked figure locked up and began the fight with Unique. Dirt Dog tried desperately to unmask his opponat, and so distracted, fell prey to the second masked man who slipped into the ring, downing the Cruiserweight champ with a "Bullet Train to hell."  The first masked man rolled out as the ref made the count.  To the cries of "3M! 3M!" from the crowd, the masked figure soaked up the applause before ripping off the mask to reveal Joe Petrow.  Immediatly, Petrow grabbed the mic and shouted "Nobody is above the law of the IIWF, even Joe Petrow.  C'mon, disqualify me."  Left with no choice, Alfonso held up Dirt Dog Unique Allah's arm in victory, cueing the DQ.  3M and Petrow immediatly retreated to their place in the crowd, celebrating their strategic loss. RESULT:  Dirt Dog Unique Allah by disqualification. LM: I'm not sure I understand what happened here. BL: Simple.  Petrow and MacArthur plotted a victory then reprimanded     themselves. LM: But... BL: One word:  Petrow. LM: That was only the first bout in what was indeed the "Day of Rage"      First we saw Dirt Dog, then the Prophets of Rage, then Tony Starks. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Prophets of Rage vs. Hollywood Bloods ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The camera opens to the back locker room. Doug Wayne is pacing all around while Clark Watson is drinking a bottle of spring water.] DW: Moments away from our match with the Prophets of Rage.  Well, at     least Clark ain't drinkin beer this time. Nothin' beats bottled water before the match, huh, Watson? CW: This water sucks. I wish I had some liqour. DW: No you don't, man. We got the Prophets in a few minutes. You got to be as sober as possible for this match. CW: Prophets, shmophets. They ain't [bleep]. We are gonna kick them all     around the ring. DW: Our winning streek is gonna reach two, man. We eliminated former champions last week and we are gonna eliminate former champs this week. Prophets, you guys had your day in the sun. But now it's over. It's time for us to put you out of your misery. We are the vet and you guys are the dogs. And we say it's time to put you sick little creatures to sleep. How 'bout it, Watson? CW: Man, I can care less about the "big and bad" Prophets of Rage. Those     guys never impressed me. They are just another roadblock that the IIWF suits have thrown in our way. DW: Week after week we got to come over another obstacle. We are the tag team that just won't stay down. We've been hit with fireballs, chairs, and every other object. We've been attacked from every which way. But you know what, we are still here. We've fought wars against the best wrestlers in the war. Gone through Hell. We are still here laughing in your faces. How does that make you feel, Prophets of Rage, Cold Spell, and especially Last Resort? You can't get rid of us. We are eventually gonna get to you. Pain Inc. found out last week. They crumbled under our pressure. And eventually     all of you will too. CW: [looks up at Wayne] Good inspirational speech. DW: Thank you, good buddy. Just always remember: "what goes around, comes around" -- and I think we are coming back around. See ya in the ring, boys. [Cut to the highlights:]     Once again Madusa made the introductions.  As her men entered to the     ring, the Bloods jumped them from behind.  Eventually the brawl found its way into the ring, and the match began.  It was into this that Licensed for Destruction came ringside, pulling up chairs and     munching happily on bags of popcorn.  Bloods fought a hit-and-run offense, Wayne delivering a kick or shot than immediately making the hot tag to Watson who would do the same before bringing the tag back to Wayne.  The Prophets' dislike of the former W & W Express was more than evident.  Eventually their brute strength and size began to come to their advantage as they began to wear down the Bloods and decrease the frequency of their fast tags.  That's when the Prophets began their own quick tags, trying to match the larger Derek against the smaller Wayne.  With the momentum clearly in The Prophets' favour, Reggie Starr of LFD distracted the ref with false claims of Medusa slipping an object to Derek Rage.  Meanwhile, Jonathan Chaos snuck into the ring, swinging a chair at Shadoe Rage who was suplexing Clark Watson.  Watson reversed the suplex, and Chaos's chair attack missed its intended target, instead taking out the Hollywood Blood.  This is all it took for Shadoe to make the cover     as Wayne immediately locked up with an exiting Chaos. As the Hollywood Bloods brawled backstage with LFD, the entire complement of Age of Rage entered the ring, standing shoulder to shoulder.  Pizzazz grabbed up the microphone, calling out Joe Petrow and Majestic Maurice McArthur to leave the haven of the audience and enter the ring. Outnumbered by Starks, Dirt Dog, The Prophets, Medusa and Pizzazz, Petrow merely held up the US tag championship belt to the delight of the crowd. RESULT:  Prophets of Rage by pinfall LM: Those who think that Genesis is the only stable in the IIWF better     think again.  The Age of Rage is just plain scary. BL: Yes, but then again, to you clowns are scary. LM: But the Age of Rage aren't clowns. BL: Please tell me that isn't in your script. LM: As a matter of fact, it is.  [He shows Becky] BL: Maybe I can get a job turning letters on "Wheel of Fortune." ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Tony Starks vs. Kevin "Cavalier" Christiansen ------------------------------------------------------------------------    Starks stayed in the ring as the other Age of Ragers moved out.  Medusa again made her introduction.  The match itself pitted two styles that couldn't be more incompatible.  Starks wrestled his legendary abilities for technical holds, slowly the pace and breaking only at the last moments.  Christiansen tried his best to knock the wind out of his opponent, mixing suplexes and powerbombs with heavy whips to the corner.  "The Cavalier" seemed in a hurry, twice attempting "The Broadsword" before his opponent was disabled.   Finally, Starks got the upper hand, locking young Kevin in an abdominal stretch which forced the submission.  Starks immediately left the ring, he and his companions jeering the idealistic Christiansen.  So distracted by his departing opponents, Christiansen didn't notice the approach of Timothy N. Turner who quickly snuck into the ring and pulled a pair of "He-Man Master of the Universe" Under-roos firmly over his head. Furious, Christiansen pulled the decorated underwear off his head, snapping and chasing down Turner.  The two locked up in the aisle, and Christiansen delivered a number of stiff shots before finally leaving backstage. RESULT: Starks by submission. LM: Certainly no love lost between Christiansen and Turner.  It seems that the jabs from the former are beginning to unravel the young Cavalier. BL: Y'know, I don't get that.  Christiansen pretends to be following     some chivalric english code of honor, but he picks as his nickname     a French word. LM: And you would be the expert on the French tongue. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Syndicate vs. The Last Resort ------------------------------------------------------------------------        This match saw a fight before it even began.  Upon their entrance,     Last Resort was attacked in the aisle by the Hollywood Bloods who     appeared to still be sore from their previous engagement.  The     attack was so unexpected and ferocious that the Resort could barely     defend themselves.  The Bloods continued to pound until security     dragged the teams apart, leaving El Diablo strattled over the crowd     barrier.  Referee Earl Alfonso gave the Resort the option of not     competing tonight, and a call was placed to the front office, but     gallantly Diablo and his masked partner chose to compete.  This was     to their undoing as El Diablo was grounded by his injured knee and The Masked Avenger did not have the stamina to compete with Casey James and Tiger Claw's precision tags.  In very short order, The Syndicate landed the "Syndication" powerbomb/flying bulldog pinning     combination.  Afterwards, Casey James took the mic: [Cut to footage subtitled, "Earlier Tonight." Casey James and Tiger Claw finish roughly ejecting El Diablo and the Masked Avenger from the ring. Casey motions for the microphone from the timekeeper's table:] LM: I guess Casey's got something to say to us... [Casey looks to the crowd, who begin popping.] CJ: Alright, listen up. I've got something to say. Oh, and quit it with     this cheering crap. You all saw what happened on Saturday. Requiem     gets all egotistic because he's got guys watching his back, so I     figure I'm going to call his bluff. Requiem makes the challenge for     anyone to face him, and all his goons jump me as I run down to the     ring. The question gets asked, though, why was I there? Was I there to help Deathbringer? Hell no. I was there because I saw a guy wearing _my_ belt, talking about how he was number one. No way. Requiem, you never beat me, you never even faced me. You're not even fit to wear that belt. You're no champion, you're not even a contender. The only thing you are is a good goddamned reason for me to draw up another singles contract for myself! [The crowd gives a feral pop. Tiger Claw nods his head in agreement.] CJ: I ain't going to do that, though. Claw is my partner, and there's no     changing that. Requiem, you might get your chance to prove yourself     against me. In fact, you better hope for it, because until you do,     you're nothing in the eyes of the entire IIWF. Requiem, you claim to     be taking the IIWF into a fresh new world. You claim to be the future, but all you're showing me is the past. Gang attacks, double crosses... It's all been done. All Genesis are is a bunch of pretenders to the throne that the Syndicate sits in. The Syndicate wrote the script, little boys, and all you're doing is playing the roles. The only difference is that we never claimed to be some army of some valiant movement. Yeah, you're a movement alright... The kind where no matter how much you wipe, the paper keeps coming up brown. [Claw looks at Casey for a moment, wincing a bit...] CJ: You get my point. It comes down to this, Requiem. I issue a challenge to you and your gang. You pick four of your guys to meet four of my guys. You know who two of us are, so let's be fair. We want two of your guys to be Cold Spell. I'm sure you can understand that Claw and I are... interested in something they have. If all of you are _men,_ we'll see you in the ring, so I guess that means there's going to have to be some added incentive. Requiem, if your boys can beat my _men,_ I will get down on one knee and show my respect to you as champion. I will tell the world how I respect your position. It won't happen unless your kids can beat my men. We await your answer. [Casey drops the microphone, and The Syndicate leaves the ring and walks up the aisle.] RESULT:  Syndicate by pinfall LM: I don't know what to talk about first.  The Hollywood Bloods jumping     the Last Resort -- or The Syndicate calling out Requiem. BL: Then do us all a favor and say nothing.  LM: [pointing to script]  But I have some stuff written here... BL: [grabs the paper and writes on it furiously]  Larry... says... nothing. I was wondering how long before some of the "Old timers" got tired of Requiem and his groupies.  One can only listen to the "Music of the Underwhelmingly Impressed" for so long.  If only the Horsemen were here. LM: Maybe Kinder and Outlaw are the other two in Casey James's equation? BL: [Dreamily]  Brad Kinder. LM: I'd like to take this moment to explain some of our technical     difficulties these past two weeks.  It seems that the flood in     which President Clinton has since declared a national disaster has     complicated the life of our regular producer, effectively leaving the home of his widowed mother five feet deep in water. BL: And Pres. Spreadbury had a fire to deal with.  If only those two could get together.  Fire... water... signs of the apocalypse.  Next thing you know, Brody Thunder and ex-VP Steve Owens will be cracking     lobsters on a beach in Maine. LM: Let's not go too far, that sort of thing could never happen. BL: Because I've stole Larry's last page to his script and he doesn't know what to say, I'll rremind you to tune in to "Countdown" on Friday to hear Larry get more abuse. [The camera pulls out past the "White Pheonix Memorial Fire Extinguisher." Larry shuffles through his papers looking feverishly for the last page. Becky sticks her bubble gum under the table. Fade.] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Jim Jividen | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | brokeback@webtv.net | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+