. ___. __ ____ __ ________ ______ ||\ |/ | || | | || | || |\ \ /\ / /| __| || \|\__ | __||__ | |_||__ | || | \ v v / | __| || | \|/ || | | || |_||_| \_/\_/ |_| ||______/|\__||__ | | ||_________________________ August 16 1997 ................................................... ["Dreams" by Van Halen plays as the shot fades up on an F-111 fighter plane shooting across a pastel blue sky which is, almost precariously, perched above the wide expanse of the Atlantic Ocean. The plane dives and turns, the pilot manipulating its flight in such a manner as to make the words: "Road to Ring Wars Four" appear momentarily in its stream. Cut to the interior of the cockpit, immediately behind the pilot, who veteran observers of "Inside the IIWF" recognize as Nils, the IIWF busdriver, are, side by side, seated veteran IIWF commentator Tim Dross and Steve "Soundbite" Roberts. Dross, looking three shades more green than we are used to seeing him, has his eyes closed and is swaying gently, his official IIWF Air Express bomber jacket displaying more than one stain of what has clearly been a difficult trip. The Soundbite, however, is clearly in his element... a purple scarf, huge aviator glasses and an orange fur coat augmenting his t-shirt which sports a huge picture of the Enola Gay flying over Japan along with the caption: "Now... That's A Bump!" The music stops and the shaky camera shot focuses on the even shakier Dross...] TD: Hello again, everyone, and welcome to... welcome to "Inside the IIWF".  It's your weekly... well, your weekly look at all the... the things. The things that we look at. I am, unfortunately, your host Tim Dross... currently in the cockpit of an F-111 fighter plane which tops out at Mach 2.2.  Mach 2.2.  I am here with our pilot for the IIWF Air Express... Nils.  [Nils waves a meaty hand in the air... and the plane again takes a dramatic dive.] TD: Oh.  Oh... OHHHHHHH!  [An official IIWF airsickness bag is handed to Dross, it sports a picture of Larry Morton dressed in an owl costume saying, "Be a Hoot, Don't Pollute!"] TD: Alongside me is my tag team colleague, Steve "Soundbite" Roberts. Take it away, Steve. SR: Ho, Ho, Ho.  Slow down, big man.  I need the full boat introduction.  The bells, the whistles, the dancing bear and the Girl Scouts.  Give me the bidness, big man.  I needs the bidness! TD: Steve.  Please.  I have never been so sick... so... sick.  So sick. Please.  Please.  Steve Roberts, we are here in an F-111 looking at all the reviews and the previews.  What?  [Dross buries his head inside the bag.] SR: Now see.  This is just sad.  You ungrateful bastards have done this to my best friend Dross.  All the whining... the constant complaining... the endless charges of tax evasion.  Of statutory -- she said she was seventeen for Chrissake!  You bastards have reduced what was once a proud Dross to a quivering, simpering mass of flatulent jelly. TD: Steve Roberts, I don't think... SR: Goddammit people -- look at this beautiful, beuatiful fat man!  His once proudly fleshy body now ravaged by chlymidia and other sexually transmitted diseases which leave his flesh yellow and peeling off in places that we can't talk about even on a second rate, crappy-ass show like "Inside the IIWF".  Highlights and sidelights my ass!  Look what you morons have done to Dross! TD: Steve... Steve... SR: See... there he goes again.  He gives and gives and gives to you morons... and this is the thanks he gets.  Do any of you send him a card on his birthday?  Hell, no.  When is that, anyway... June? TD: September.  Steve... SR: Everyone he's ever cared for has left him.  Abandoned him. His family dead or crazy.  His only true love, Penelope Ann, now turning tricks in the Appalachian Mountains... orally servicing hundreds and hundreds of Turkish oil workers every day.  My buddy Dross now left to live out his final years alone in a grimy studio apartment in the armpit of humanity, Portland, Oregon... with music by the Stray Cats blaring twenty-four hours a day as he desperately tries to keep his one remaining chance at human contact by learning all of the lyrics to "(She's) Sexy + 17".  And it's all your fault.  Each and every one of you.  Goddamn leeches. TD: Steve Roberts... perhaps we should look at some of the headlines coming out of Midsummer Madness, we are only a week and a half removed from all the events that went down at the IIWF Coliseum and there is oh-so-much to talk about. SR: Headlice?  Don't get me started on the headlice.  You bastards are killing my buddy Dross!  I will rip the lips off of each and every one of you! TD: Good grief. SR: Don't mention it. TD: In the aftermath of Midsummer Madness a few things stand out, Steve Roberts.  There is a question that every IIWF fan is asking himself right now. SR: Is it, "since Jericho quit... now who's the ugliest guy in the IIWF?"  I'm thinking maybe LFD Chaos.  Or the new guy, Bundy.  But you gotta get back to me on this one.  I can't do everything at once, people.  TD: I was actually thinking of, "What in the world is Casey James doing?"  Here is a man who could be called the originator of the Old Generation, the standardbearer -- and he prevents a man who was supposed to be a friend of his -- Otto Verhoeven -- from winning the IIWF Championship.  I just can't understand it. SR: Well, I can make it real simple.   Listen up, morons... IT'S NOT CASEY JAMES! Got it?  The Masked Outlaw guy, whoever the hell that piece of crap is -- he's not Casey James. TD: That begs the question, Steve Roberts... who is under the mask? SR: Well, you know I thought it was J.W. Hardin.  Especially when he whacked out Kauffman.  Danny... Danny, we miss you, Danny... But there is no way the Outlaw would come back and side with that no-good Boy Requiem... is that guy still champ, Dross?  There is no way he'd side with Requiem over the Butcher.  No damn way.  But there's no way it's James, either.  Why would James help out Requiem right after he had just taken the tag team belts away from Cold Spell?  Don't make any sense. The whole world's gone strange, Dross. TD: Well, the facts remain that we have seen Casey James on more than one occasion dressed as the Masked Outlaw.  And that Casey James seems to mysteriously disappear just before we see the Masked Outlaw.  We have never seen them together, Steve Roberts... SR: Like Nightwing and Traci Lords. TD: Exactly.  What? SR: You know... the sucking.  Never mind.  The point is that there are lots of guys who could be defiling the graven image of the legendary Hardin.  Lots of guys who we haven't seen at the same time we've seen this "Masked Outlaw"... you have to expand your mind, Dross.  You have to look at all the beautiful colors and shapes.  Here, Dross... take a couple of these pills I found in Warnett's locker.  One pill makes you bigger and one pill makes you small.  TD: Dramamine, Steve Roberts.  Any sort of motion sickness medicine would be great. SR: Aw, who thinks to bring that when they are flying to Japan on a fighter jet.  Who planned our little circumnavigation of the globe here -- Magellan?  Why the hell are we flying across the Atlantic Ocean on a flight from Portland to Tokyo?  This is exactly the kind of thing that I'm talking about, Dross.  The bastards trying to get us.  I ain't gonna stand for it much longer.  Corn star.  Unbelievable. TD: The other big story coming out of Midsummer Madness would be the powerful defeat of Genesis at the hands of the combined IIWF forces of Steve Kowalski, Brody Thunder, Mad Dog Watkins and, ironically enough, the Syndicate. SR: Okay... let's stop the plane right here. [Dross suddenly lurches forward... making a gurgling sound.] SR: Nils... Nils.  Figure of speech, pal.  Ease up.  What I mean is... this is something I've been waiting for and I'd really like all the Genesis boys... the unfrozen caveman wrestler... the bodybuilder... the mid-card jobber has-been... the gay guy and his life partner -- listen real close, girls... lean in close to your thirteen inch black and white sets... adjust the rabbit ears and listen up -- I know how much you like to hear the Soundbite Shoot.... Are you listening, Culture Club? Are you listening? It is _over_.  Get me, ladies?  Over?  The Skullpumps... the Cattle Busters... the Golden Tiger Strike... ring a bell, girls? It is over.  Genesis is dead!  Got me?  Genesis is dead! You may as well call up Elton John and have him rework one of his crappy songs for you... because Genesis is dead! TD: Good grief. SR: Hey, I waited a long time.  Give me a little damn credit, Dross. TD: Well, Genesis did indeed suffer a major body blow at Midsummer Madness.  They were defeated and defeated solidly by the combined IIWF forces... Cold Spell lost their long held IIWF tag team titles to James and Claw -- giving the Syndicate one more belt for the trophy case. And... the IIWF Intercontinental belt has been returned to its rightful owner, Mad Dog Watkins.  Not to mention the dissention that had become noticeable between Icehawk and the rest of Genesis boiled over in that matchup... to the point where the young gymnast took a brutal beating at the hands of Kowalski, Thunder and Claw at match's conclusion. You have to wonder what role all of that will play in the future of this group. SR: Rain of trikes, Dross.  Rain of trikes.  Big, small, short, tall. Every single one of them all -- it was raining trikes at the Madness.  I love it! TD: Something else the people loved at Midsummer Madness was that fine encounter between Chris Quigley and Marty Warnett -- with the Party Maniac finally able to take that "big step" into superstar status with a dramatic pinfall victory. SR: Quigley loses a pay-per-view.  Film at 11. TD: Well, we are indeed left with that picture of Chris Quigley, refusing to shake the hand of Marty Warnett.  There are few superstars in this sport who take losing, frankly, as poorly as does Chris Quigley and you just have to wonder about his future here in the IIWF.  You also have to wonder about Warnett -- this is not only a tremendous accomplishment for him -- but quite an opportunity.  Can Marty Warnett build on this... can he continue now to burn brightly amidst an increasingly crowded IIWF sky? [Nils jerks his head back... and then begins to wildly weave the F-111 across the sky, making a sharp westward turn and sending Dross snapping back to his seat.] TD: Ohhhhh. SR: Nils, decaf, buddy.  Decaf.  It's a Dross-ism.  IIWF sky.  Not the real sky.  Hey, since when are you a fighter pilot?  You drive the damn bus.  Just because it says "IIWF Express," that means you know how to drive it?  Damn morons. While Dross recovers, we had some other matches, I'm sure.  I don't really pay as much attention as he does.  Let's see.... Oh yeah... Mota.  Hot damn.  The crazy, little Canadian bastard is the Crusierweight Champion.  Good for you Mota.  Who else? Paris. Ronnie Paris.  Who would have believed it? Who would have ever believed that the little guy with the girlfriend whith the wandering hands -- that Maggie is a spitfire, Paris, you better keep an eye out on her -- who would have ever thought that guy would grow a pair?  You know what I'm saying?  Paris and Stud Stetson survive their Midsummer Madness match -- gotta love it. TD: That was Billy Shakespeare. SR: Huh? TD: Billy Shakespeare and Ronnie Paris survived. SR: I thought you wanted me to do this, Dross.  Let's see... Starks survived.  You want a prediction, Dross?  You want a prediction?  We are gonna see a resurgence of the Age of the Rage... the Prophets -- Unique -- hell, even Starks.  We are gonna see some serious old school style gangsta bitch beatdowns over the next couple of months.  I wouldn't be surprised to see the Rage take over from Genesis as the bad boyz to watch around this hood, Dross.  Rat-a-tat tat that ass, Dross.  My nine is easy to load.  TD: I don't have any idea what you're talking about, Steve Roberts. SR: Bow wow wow, yippee yo, yippee yay, Soundbite definitely in the ho-use.  Hey, Dross -- what say ya' gets the skanky and throw it on my hang down? TD: Good grief. SR: Forget the oreos, Dross.  Eat Sound-bite cookies! TD: We also saw impressive performances at Midsummer Madness by Tonnage and Harlequin Tragedy -- Luke Steele continued his mercurial ways by walking out on his partners... Ike Sampson and Tony Starks continued their bad feelings toward each other -- and some bad feelings have clearly developed between Duncan Macbeth and the Subway Psycho... who has shown a decidedly more vicious streak since returning to the IIWF. SR: And yet... in proud Subway Psycho fashion... he still lost.  Awwwwww. The more things change the more they stay the same.  Are you telling me that Blitzsphere is still with the promotion, Dross?  I'll be damned. TD: That's Billy Shakespeare, Steve Roberts... who once again was dominant at Midsummer Madness as were so many of the so-called "Old Generation".  A man who has been a big part of that collective... but who now appears to be out of the IIWF for good... is the Deathbringer... who finally reached the end of his rope -- nearly causing a tremendous explosion in that Genesis match -- and he has been let go... shockingly, let go by the IIWF.  I understand that we have some special footage from Midsummer Madness: [SCENE: Footage subtitled with "September 6th, 1997". The camera, which is obviously positioned on the shoulder of a cameraman, shows a corridor somewhere within the IIWF Coliseum.  A huge heel pop from the ring area as well as other sounds of battling opponents indicate that this footage was recorded somewhen during the Otto Verhoeven/Requiem-matchup. Suddenly Deathbringer comes running around a corner from the left, holding a baseball bat in his right hand, with which he now points at the cameraman, shouting:] DB: Get out of my way, mortal, or I will break your neck! [The cameraman moves backwards and simultaneously turns the camera to the right, from where Poutine Janois enters the scene, seemingly seething because of the events that took place earlier on that night] PJ: Hold it right there, Deathbringer! What are you...? [Janois doesn't even get the chance to finish his sentence, as Deathbringer grabs him around the throat with his left hand and throws him against the wall, holding him right there and raising him up into the air for about two feet. He then starts to shout at Janois in a voice, which sounds colder, more evil and first of all more wrathful than ever before:] DB: SHUT UP, YOU MORTAL FOOL! I am here to make sure that the right man walks away out of this match as the winner, and that man certainly should not be Requiem! [Janois, who obviously isn't comfortable at all in the current position, tries to interrupt Deathbringer, but his voice is barely audible as a result of the choking hand around his throat:] PJ: But... DB: SHUT UP! Didn't you see that masked man that hangs out around here? This man is going to create havoc in the ring tonight, and this man is going to ruin the Butcher's chance at winning the belt! That is something that I cannot accept! PJ: But... DB: JANOIS, SHUT UP! I am going out there right now, and I will do what I should have done a long time ago! And no one, _NO ONE_ is going to stop me this time! PJ: But... DB: ONE MORE WORD, AND IT WILL BE YOUR LAST! This league used to be the greatest league around, and suddenly, out of nowhere, guys like Requiem come to the IIWF, cheat and cheat and cheat, and no one does anything against it! What is wrong with you officials? Is there nothing that you can do the right way? You are probably the most incompetent officials the wrestling world has ever seen! But that is of no importance any more as I am going out there right now, and you will be surprised about what I will accomplish there! [Deathbringer drops Janois down, who falls down on his knees. The Dark Destroyer turns to the right and starts to rush off the scene, as Janois rises up, saying:] PJ: You will go nowhere, Deathbringer! I hereby suspend you right away! [A couple of security guards appear at the scene, stepping into the way of Deathbringer who comes to a halt and turns around to Janois again:] DB: I am _what_? [Deathbringer, intimidating as always, slowly stalks towards Janois, who, despite starting to tremble, keeps standing straight, not willing to retreat:] DB: I... AM... _WHAT_? [Deathbringer drops the bat and walks even closer towards Janois, until he is merely an inch away from the official.] PJ: I said that you are... [Deathbringer interrupts Janois, his voice is now barely heard as a whisper:] DB: You want to suspend me? [There is silence for the fraction of a second, but this silence appears to last forever, until Deathbringer suddenly again begin to shout at the now terrified official:] DB: YOU WANT TO SUSPEND ME? Now listen closely, Janois, I am sick and tired of you officials! As a matter of fact, I had enough of you ever since you allowed the "Outlaw" J.W. Hardin to interfere in my casket match against Otto "the Butcher" Verhoeven! The cheating and the interferences in this league go on and on, but you do not even try to do anything against it! I once thought of this league as the best there is around the globe... but now... now I _spit_ on this league, yes, I spit on the IIWF, this league is a joke, the whole world is laughing about a league where a guy like Requiem holds the championship belt in his hands. No, I have got enough of this... You want to suspend me? I will tell you something, Janois: [Deathbringer turns around, sees a fire extinguisher, which has been fixed to the walls, walks over to it and grabs it. The Dark Destroyer then turns over to Janois again, raises the fire extinguisher high into the air with his right hand and approaches the offical. Immediately the security guards try to stop Deathbringer, but he just pushes them one by one against the wall, each of them going down with a moaning sound:] DB: You want to suspend me... but you will not! PJ: But... DB: What are you trying to do? Talk me to death? Janois, you will not suspend me, but I will... _LEAVE THIS LEAGUE ON MY OWN TWO FEET_! PJ: But... DB: Yes, you heard right... The IIWF may go down if it likes to, and the officials may continue to do nothing against those rulebreakers... but _I_ am not going to look at all those incidents anymore... no, I am done with this league... and now... [Deathbringer raises the fire-extinguisher even higher, and Janois falls down to his knees, awaiting the vicious blow Deathbringer is preparing] DB: Now... the Reaper will leave this league... and he will go down to the fires of Hell... [Deathbringer smashes the fire extinguisher down, but not onto Janois. It hits the floor, and immediately a chemical mist emerges from it, blinding the camera for a few seconds. The camera's microphones pick up the coughing of Janois and the cameraman, together with that of the security guards. As the mist clears Deathbringer is gone, but his cowl and mask lie on the floor right where he stood before the fire extinguisher went off. Suddenly his voice is heard calling through the corridor:] DB: And do not even think about putting me into that Hall of Fame of yours... I spit on that, too... [Silence. Janois, and the security guards slowly stand up again, still suffering from the mist. Cut back to the studio.] TD: Well, that was yesterday -- but today life moves on and we leave Midsummer Madness '97 to the historians and move forward... on to Tokyo and on to the Road to Ring Wars IV -- let's take our _First Look_ at our latest sojourn across the globe. ________ ______ | || |\ \ /\ / /| __|.................................................. | || | \ v v / | __| FIRST LOOK: The Road to Ring Wars IV Tour |_||_| \_/\_/ |_|.................................................... ------------------------------------------------------------------------ SHOW DATE VENUE IIWF Saturday Night 20/9/97 Egg Dome, Tokyo, Japan IIWF Wednesday War Room 24/9/97 Corner Brook Regional Civic Centre Corner Brook, Newfoundland, Canada IIWF Saturday Night 27/9/97 Saddledome, Calgary, Alberta, Canada IIWF Wednesday War Room 1/10/97 IIWF Coliseum, Portland, Oregon IIWF Saturday Night 4/10/97 IIWF Coliseum, Portland, Oregon IIWF Wednesday War Room 8/10/97 North Carolina (venue TBC) IIWF Saturday Night 11/10/97 Charlotte, North Carolina IIWF Saturday Night 18/10/97 Leavenworth Federal Penitentiary, Leavenworth, Kansas IIWF Wednesday War Room 22/10/97 venue TBC IIWF Saturday Night 25/10/97 Roswell, New Mexico IIWF Wednesday War Room 28/10/97 venue TBC IIWF Saturday Night 1/11/97 Disneyland, Anaheim, California IIWF Ring Wars IV 8/11/97 LA Memorial Coliseum, Los Angeles, California ------------------------------------------------------------------------ TD: Quite a roadtrip planned for the next seven weeks as we march on toward what should be... what well could be a very special IIWF pay-per-view.  Fans, there is only so much that we can tell you -- but believe me when I say that the folks in the IIWF Towers are working night and day to make Ring Wars IV on November 8 a night to remember. To that end, we have this schedule... seven full weeks -- seven weeks where the IIWF goes on the road, seven weeks where the IIWF makes a global march -- we will hit cities like Tokyo, home of Joe Petrow, former home of Ronne Paris... both men who are on the card this Saturday Night. ...then on to the Saddledome in Calgary -- where men like Timothy N. Turner, Derek Mota, Chris Quigley and Serge Annis are certain to receive big home country responses.  All will be in action -- perhaps as participants in the twenty-man over the top battle royal, the winner of which will -- get this -- the winner of which will receive a shot at the Intercontinental Championship at Ring Wars IV! We then go home for a week -- Portland area fans, tickets for the October 4 IIWF Saturday Night go on sale tomorrow night -- please call your local Ticketmaster outlet for details... and fans -- that's not one you want to miss as it will be the only IIWF Saturday Night to originate from the IIWF Coliseum until November 22!  On the card that night, two title defenses -- Brody Thunder will meet Requiem or whomever the World Champion happens to be... with the gold on the line -- and Serge Annis will meet Mad Dog Watkins -- or whomever the champion happens to be -- for the IC strap.  A big, big night from the IIWF Coliseum! On Oct 11 -- we head to Charlotte, North Carolina, and receiving hometown welcomes will be Ike Sampson and the man who will fight in a first round Cruiserweight Contender Tournament matchup... the Phoenix. Yes, folks... eight cruiserweights, maybe the most electrifying athletes in all the IIWF, have been placed in a tournament, the winner will get the shot, the shot at the Cruiserweight Title at Ring Wars IV! We then move to a slightly... alternative site. SR: This is my favorite part, Dross -- tell the people where the suits have booked us for October 18.  I love this.  TD: On October 18 -- the Road to Ring Wars IV winds its way to the Federal Penitentiary in Leavenworth, Kansas.  That's right, folks.  The most dangerous criminals locked up in this country... locked up in maximum security Leavenworth -- and they will be the audience... they will be the audience for what may be the most unique IIWF Saturday Night of all time. SR: Talk about Rage in the Cage, Dross.  Damn.  We'll finally be able to meet Creed's daddy. TD: I don't believe Creed's father was in prison. SR: No... not his father.  Creed's daddy.  See what I'm saying, Dross? TD: We'll then go on to Roswell, New Mexico -- where the residents we'll meet some real extra-terrestrial life forms... the superstars of the IIWF -- and on the card that night will be a World Heavyweight Championship match for the Subway Psycho, and an Intercontinental shot for Dirt Dog Unique Allah! Finally, finally we hit Southern California -- home of the "Showstopper" Simon Lebec who is sure to to get quite a welcome as the IIWF entertains the masses at the "Happiest Place on Earth"... Disneyland, in Anaheim, California! SR: From Leavenworth to Disneyland.  I don't know which will be more fun, Dross.   Sure, at Leavenworth, there's a good chance that the Machines will find love -- but Disneyland has lines filled with children screaming to watch their favorite cartoon characters come to life.... Sounds like a house show for a certain Atlanta based promotion... TD: Then, finally -- in front of over 100,000 screaming fans -- the IIWF will arrive at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum... and folks -- let me just tell you this -- there are negotiations right now ongoing with some of the biggest stars in the world of professional wrestling to be in attendance for this one.  I have a feeling... I have a feeling that this one is gonna be special. Ring Wars IV -- November 8, 1997.  But the road starts this Saturday Night from the Egg Dome in Tokyo, Japan where 60,000 IIWF fans will thrill to the action of three big title defenses -- here is your big _First Look_ at all the action! ________ ______ | || |\ \ /\ / /| __|.................................................. | || | \ v v / | __| FIRST LOOK: IIWF Saturday Night: 20 September |_||_| \_/\_/ |_|.................................................... 1. IIWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: Requiem [c] vs. "Sychosys" Joe Petrow 2. IIWF INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: Mad Dog Watkins [c] vs. "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley 3. NON-TITLE: Derek Mota vs. Marty Warnett 4. IIWF WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: The Syndicate [c] vs. Cold Spell 5. "Lone Wolf" Brody Thunder vs. Highwayman 6. Tony Starks vs. Tonnage 7. The Harlequins vs. Licensed for Devastation 8. IIWF CRUISERWEIGHT TOURNAMENT FIRST ROUND: Ronnie Paris vs. Timothy N. Turner SR: How ya feelin', big man? TD: Much better, thank you.  Now that Nils has stabilized the plane. Thank you, Nils.  Steve Roberts, exactly how did we come about flying on a fighter plane to Tokyo? SR: Not just a fighter plane, Dross.  An F-111, manufactured by Pratt & Whitney with TF-30 afterburning turboforms and two B43 bombs locked and loaded and ready to fire.  Ain't that right, Nils? [Nils takes another dip down, while simultaneously giving a big thumbs up.] TD: Ohhhhhh. SR: That's the swing wing, Dross -- really helps for maneuverability when you're executing an Immelman turn to get bogies off your six. TD: Off your six?  Bogies? SR: Dammit, Dross -- didn't my days in the Air Force teach you anything?  The F-111 is the plane I used to invade Libya a few years back... God, those were the days, bombing children at night and part-y-ing ev-er-y-day.  Me and the fellas, Maverick and Iceman... I took an inverted picture of a MiG.  Kelly Mcgillis' hot little... [Soundbite begins to noticeably tear up.] Why... why did Goose have to die, Dross?  Why did Goose have to die? [Soundbite then, not unexpectedly, bursts into song.] # You're trying hard not to show it / But Baby, Baby I know it / You've lost / that lovin' feelin' / Wo-wo that lo-vin' feelin' # TD: Big.... Big card from the Egg Dome in Tokyo when the IIWF returns this Saturday Night.  Joe Petrow, in his adopted homeland, will get his first shot at the biggest prize in all of wrestling when he meets Requiem. SR: [dabbing his eyes] It's okay to cry, Dross.  As long as you do it in a masculine way.  Hell, once in Thailand I got a bikini wax -- and I never felt more like a man in my life.  TD: The Intercontinental gold is also up for grabs when Mad Dog Watkins puts up the gold against "Quickstrike" Chris Quigley. SR: Hey, Dross -- you heard the rumors about Quigley and Thunder? TD: I don't think there is an ounce of credibility in the report about which you are referring... not an ounce.  I really don't think we should address it on this program. Suffice it to say, Brody Thunder and Chris Quigley are not going anywhere. SR: Oh, those weren't exactly the rumors I was talking about. Ooh-la-la, Quickstrike. TD: Big matchup between the Cruiserweight Champion Derek Mota -- and the man who just defeated Chris Quigley... Marty Warnett. SR: You're getting in the ring with a real Canadian now, Warnett. Ain't no flash pin gonna save you Saturday Night... ain't no Portland morons gonna cheer you to victory.  You are gonna get the thumping you deserve, courtesy of the l'il bastard himself -- Derek Mota! TD: Also, the very controversial Tag Team Champions, the Syndicate, taking on the team from which they have just taken the belts... Cold Spell. SR: IT'S NOT CASEY JAMES!  Damn, Dross... there is no controversy in Syndicate-ville, James and Claw are the champs -- just deal with it.  As for whomever is dressing up in the mask, let me tell you something -- you had better hope that guys like Otto Verhoeven, Casey James and J.W. Hardin his own self never cross your path -- or you're gonna find out what a Cattle Buster DDT and a Blackheart Punch really feel like, pal. Gonna take you right into that danger zone.  How could you possibly think that could be Casey James?  You people are so gullible. TD: Also on the big card is a match between Brody Thunder and the Highwayman... the Harlequins take on LFD... we have a very interesting matchup between Midsummer Madness survivors, Tony Starks and Tonnage... and to kick off the evening, Round One of the Cruiserweight Contenders Tournament begins with a very intriguing matchup between Ronnie Paris and Timothy Turner.  Don't miss a second of the action! SR: Unless you've got bogies on your six.  Then, for the love of God, RUN!  Run for your lives you ignorant bastards!  Run like the wind... even the tag teams... RUN!  Let the pros, like me and Dross, sort everything out. TD: I don't know about that, Steve Roberts, but what I do know about is that the IIWF will be the monster that invades Tokyo this week.  And while there may be no country in the world that treaures the great sport of ours as does Japan -- you can expect a bit of a different crowd when those 60,000 people are packed into the Egg Dome this Saturday Night. SR: Yeah, we'll see actual wrestling fans, Dross.  Not a bunch of beer-swilling, mindlessly screaming morons who have nothing better to do than yell out, "Show your toes."  This is a smart, literate, cultured group that knows how to appreciate the nuances of a feather boa and an asai moonsault.  It's a whole different ballgame in Japan, Dross.  It's gonna be a fun time.  Not as fun as the time I mowed down Khadaffi's daughter -- but pretty damn enjoyable nonetheless.  TD: Now, since we were unable to make it to Tokyo for this show... we have asked our own "Sychosys" Joe Petrow to give us a walking tour of the town that he calls home.  Let's roll the videotape. [The camera focuses on the steps of the outside of an apartment complex on the outskirts of Tokyo.  Out of the building walks "Sychosys" Joe Petrow, sporting blue jeans, leather jacket, and high-top sneakers.  He wears a pair of turtle-rim sunglasses, partially masking his healing, yet still slightly swollen face.  Joe looks at the camera:] JP: Ohayoo. [Petrow walks away from the building, as the camera follows along. Petrow seems unusually calm and content as he speaks to the camera:] JP: Y'know, I had a lot of reasons to be upset after Midsummer Madness.     Another one of those times I thought I had everything under control,     and once again, it somehow slipped away.  I was pretty down on myself, heh, especially when I looked it the mirror.     But the next day, I did what I do after every IIWF pay per view.  I     came back here.  I came back home.  And y'know, after spending a few     days back in Tokyo, you just can't be down on yourself anymore.  All     the sights, all the sounds, all the feelings you get from this place     that can't get anywhere else.  That's why, even if for only six short weeks a year, I'm proud to call this place my home.     But then a great thing happened.  I was getting ready to pack up and     go back, when I checked the corporate e-mail.  And I found out I     didn't have to go back, not just yet.  This time, the IIWF was coming to me.  And they're bringing something I've waited for a long time, a chance at the world's heavyweight championship... [Petrow's voice trails off, but he soon snaps back to reality:] JP: But there's time to talk about that later!  You came so far, the     least I can do, is give y'all the grand tour.  So welcome, youkoso,     to a day in the life of Sychosys. [We notice that Joe has arrived at the local train station, as he boards it to begin his day. Cut to the inside of Champs, a puroresu speciality store in Suidobashi. Petrow sits at a table, next to a case containing replicas of championship belts from many leagues, talking with fans and signing copies of the latest issue of Puroresu magazine, which features a close-up of a wild-eyed Petrow on the cover, with caption "Yatto Petrow no jikan ga yatte kita!?"  Fans seem surprised that Petrow can converse with them in Japanese, and his calm, carefree demeanor is a sight rarely seen in America. Cut to a shot of Petrow walking around a crowded area, the ceiling so low that Petrow must duck down to walk.  Tons of small electronics shops surround him as he speaks:] JP: Welcome to techie heaven, Akihabara!  Every electronical device ever     created, even a few that haven't, you'll find it here.  Oh!  [Petrow's eyes light up like a kind in a candy shop, as he heads over to another booth] Check this out! [Petrow wades through a box of small electronic toys, and fishes one out to show to the camera] Pocket Bass Fishing!  Ooh, I've been looking for this for months! [Petrow bargains a price for the treasured game, and walks out happily, bumping into people as he gets lost in the artificial clicks and beeps, once muttering, "Whoa, an eight pounder!" Next, Petrow is seated in the upper level of a sports arena.  The action in the background reveals that this is the Kogikukan in Ryogaku, and Petrow is watching the Fall Grand Sumo Tournament:] JP: Y'know, as great as professional wrestling is, there is no greater,     no purer form of competition in the world than sumo.  Two men get     in the ring, wearing no more than they need to, bringing no more to     the dohyo than their pride and their abilities.  Almost anything     goes, first man to force his opponent to the ground or out of the     ring wins.  C'mon, check it out! [The camera focuses on the ring, as little Mainoumi takes on the much larger Kotonowaka.  At the tachiai, both men leap at each other, cracking heads so hard as to be audible throughout he stadium.  The wrestlers separate, and begin a massive slapping attack in the center.  The larger Kotonowaka moves in for the belt, but the smaller Mainoumi steps aside, gets a belt grip of his own, and forces the big man down with an uwatenage arm throw.  The crowd cheers in approval, and closeup of Petrow is shown clapping as well, with a big smile on his face.] JP: Now that's a match!  If only I could relate this kind of competition     to the fans in the IIWF... [Petrow's voice trails off again, as he continues clapping... Fade to a noisy karaoke booth, a place where a few friends can get together and sing their troubles away.  Notable by their presence are Hakiro Matsuoko and Hiroshi Kasai from Rising Sun Revolution.  Notable by his absense is Takezo Musashi.  Food and drink flow freely, as Petrow has the mic, making a spectacle of himself performing a song from his released in Japan album, "Umarekawaru tame ni".  One would not even recognize the hard-rocking voice as Petrow's, as the song ends.  After some hoots and hollers, Hiroshi grabs the remote, and punches in his song:] JP: [in drunken jest] Mata "Moonlight Densetsu" kai!?  Mou, Sailor Moon     no utau yamete yo! HK:  Nani ittendai!?  Mars ha saiko na bijin nan da yo!  Joe koso     Ami-chan ga suki darou? [Matsuoko spits out his beer and looks at Petrow:] HM: Ami-chan!? [The room breaks into laughter, as a red-faced Petrow speaks up!] JP: Mou shiran!  Douse utau nara utatte kure! [With that, the music starts, and a bunch of grown men sing the opening to the old anime "Sailor Moon". Cut to Petrow walking around late at night in the notorious Kabuki-cho area of Shinjuku.  Various barkers call out to entice patrons to attend the various soaplands and "massage parlors", but most simply ignore the slightly inebriated caucasian Petrow:] JP: Well, there's a day in my land.  Ya better believe I'm damned happy     to be spending another week here, and to be wrestling in front of     the most frog-assed wresting fans in the entire world!  Ya think     six hundred Sychopaths in the Coliseum is something, wait til you see sixty thousand in the Egg Dome!  As my good buddy Shinya Hasimoto once said after downing a fifth of vodka by himself, "Shinesouorebuttchouzo!"     Before turning in, I'm think I'm gonna play a rousing game of     "Tease the Yakuza."  I suggest for you own good you turn the camera     off now. Ja ne! [Petrow turns around, and in an instant is engulfed by the neon lights and drunken salarymen, in the place he calls home.] ________ ______ | || |\ \ /\ / /| __|.................................................. | || | \ v v / | __| NEW BLOOD |_||_| \_/\_/ |_|.................................................... TD: Folks, the IIWF competiton continues unabated, a number of wrestlers have departed -- but the new blood continues to pump... here is a look at a few of the superstars who will be gracing the IIWF rings over the next several weeks. [Images of the new faces appear, as well as a scrolling summary of their characteristics, their profiles, and their achievements:] DAMAGE INCORPORATED ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Origin: New Orleans, Louisiana Theme Music: "Reunited" by Wu-Tang Clan Manager: Jeandra, a tall black woman with long black curly hair and brown eyes. Her wardrobe has altered from long evening gowns (with those nice spiked heels) to t-shirts and hoochie shorts and even her favorite Pay Per View outfit, a black tuxedo with glittering red trim all accompanied by a glitter-covered tennis racket. Jeandra is a former wrestler herself and competed as recently as August 1997. She gets physically involved in matches on rare occasions, but will set up a table for DI to use. Wrestler: "The Ace" Alex Porteaux "Mad Dog" Eddy Ramos Height: 6'2" 6'4" Weight: 252lbs. 376lbs Appearance: Wears long black tights with Wears a black and gold the four card symbols (spades, singlet with full-length clubs, diamonds, hearts) tights, the word "DAMAGE" running down the left leg in running down the right leg. alternating red and blue. On His fists are taped. He is the seat is the word "Ace" in a huge Hispanic man with a gold script. He is a bald physique similar to that of African-American with shifty Bam Bam Bigelow. He also brown eyes, a goatee that sports a goatee and short houses a crafty smile and black hair. a decent Pillman-esque body. Entrance: Wears black trenchcoat with Wears a black trenchoat shades and bandana, jawing with a bandana and shades. with the crowd. He either Usually barks at the crowd runs or calmly walks to the like an animal as he walks ring. or runs to ringside. 5 Favourite Moves: 1. DDT 1. Gorilla Press 2. Bulldog 2. Power slam 3. Top rope leg drop 3. Moonsault 4. Dropkick 4. Powerbomb 5. Powerslam 5. Legdrop Finisher: The Flush: fishermanbuster Dog Collar: top rope suplex powerbomb Tag Team Finisher: The End: reverse Blockbuster -- Ramos bearhugs the opponent (facing the outside), Porteaux front flips off the top into a diamond cutter (flying DDT?). Primary attributes: 1. Teamwork 1. Teamwork 2. Brawling 2. Strength 3. Intelligence 3. Brawling Profile: Porteaux is mostly a brawler who tries a high-risk move here or there. Porteaux doesn't like taking chances, and so sticks to the bread and butter of fisticuffs. Despite growing and growing, remains VERY quick. Great brawler for his size. Porteaux and Ramos have rumbled with the best of them and Porteaux feels right at home with a chair in hand or a taped fist. Porteaux likes to smile, pose, mock and even dance during the match to annoy opponents. He also knows when to bail out and when to fight and usually makes the right choice when push comes to shove. If he has any weaknesses, they are that he is not very durable -- Porteaux can take a beating, and usually does, but even if dishing out the offense, Porteaux usally fatigues faster than his partner. He is also possessed of a temper: if Ace is mad, he is very mad and is more prone to mistakes. Ramos employs many power moves like slams and splashes. Brawls with the best of them and is actually more durable than his smaller, faster partner. When brawling, Eddy goes straight for a chair and likes the idea of doubleteaming someone through a table. He intimidates opponents with his demeanour and history. Many people step into the ring with Ramos and wonder how long it will take to get out of the hospital. By simply pointing to certain victims, he establishes a reputation of destroying careers. However, he rarely wrestles and can easily get disqualified; Eddy will brawl sooner than most would like him to. He wants to put the beatdown on someone. He can also be tricked into making a mistake on occasion, but is rarely intimidated or confused for too long. [Handler: Steve Tozin (damage@iname.com)] [The scene changes to footage captioned, "Earlier This Week." The scene is somewhere dark and damp. At first pitch black... one can hear the sound of rain falling heavily. Suddenly lightning flashes and the scene is a graveyard at night. The camera is looking upwards from the ground at three figures. The first is a tall black woman with long curly hair. The second to the left of her is a bald black male wearing sunglasses. The third in the back is a HUGE Latin male with short black hair and a goatee. All three are wearing trenchcoats that cover whatever they are wearing underneath. The female is named Jeandra... the black male, Alex Porteaux, the Latin male, Eddy Ramos. They are... Damage Incorporated.] PORTEAUX: Yes, indeedy... clouds fall where there was once the bright rays of summer. Rain falls where there was once calm breezes. Imagine what falls on this place... this place where the best reign supreme. Where the dark and the light come together. Imagine what falls on this place when... JEANDRA: Sound poetic? Sound dramatic? Sound romantic to you? Maybe that's the point we want to get across. Maybe that's what we WANT you to hear. This is a whole new situation. A whole new scenario for you... IIWF. It was your fed... that a year ago was called, THE BEST. But how could the best BE the best... without the best tag team at that time within your ranks? PORTEAUX: It's been a hella long time since we've been in that ring [thunder claps] and people will think that it's rust. It's lack of recent competition... JEANDRA: ...for all of five seconds. Then the damage begins. We recognize a few names here. There are a few here that have met up with us face to face... head on. Notice they don't speak the same way anymore. Notice they don't walk the same way anymore. Their lives were changed forever... win OR lose. That's one thing we can tell you about Damage. Should we dare spoil the suprise, Ace? PORTEAUX: Does it matter, ami? In due time, everybody gonna know how we earned our name. How we earned our reputation. We didn't get it for babbling forty minutes at a time about how we're gonna beat ONE person. We didn't get THESE... [Ramos pulls out a plaque that reads "DAMAGE INCORPORATED 1996 RSPWF Tag Team of the Year" and places it back within his trenchcoat] ...by doing and playing the same old game. No. We innovate and we devastate. And people think a lot of this is talk. JEANDRA: They're right. Right now, it's just all talk. We could get up and yell and scream. Or we could make you think. Think about what's gonna happen. Think about what's coming. Could you imagine? I don't think you can. I'd tell you to get ready. But it won't mean a thing. PORTEAUX: You tell us to die in darkness... but what if darkness is our home... JEANDRA: ...and we're already dead? [She blows a kiss to the camera as the shot slowly shifts downwards towards what they are all facing, a headstone] It's time.... [the headstone reads: "R.I.P. DAMAGE INCORPORATED 1994-1997"] RAMOS: LET'S GET IT ON! [Fade. The next montage of text and video swirls onto the screen:] THE DOWN BOYS ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Theme Music: "Down Boys" by Warrant Manager: Awesome T Orientation: Face Wrestler: "Superstud" Adam Peterson "Dazzling" Dan Oliver Weight: 228lbs 229lbs Height:  5'11" 5'10" Origin:  Miami, FL Malibu, CA Appearance: Adam and Dan dress straight out of a 1989 MTV video.  They both sport long tights with a reference to an 80's hair band song lyric (ie "Livin' On A Prayer") airbrushed on the ass.  Adam's tights have "Superstud" airbrushed down the leg of his tights, while Dan has "Dazzling" airbrushed down the leg of his.  Their hair is full of hairspray and teased to a four inch height, Adam's being brown and Dan's being blond. Favorite Moves: 1. Tilt-a-whirl 1. Springboard hurricanrana backbreaker into a cradle 2. Dragon screw leg whip, 2. Handspring Flying Elbow 3. Running Liger Bomb 3. Moonsault Legdrop 4. Tombstone off second 4. Michinoku Driver turnbuckle 5. Fish Stretch Sleeper 5. Fish Stretch Sleeper. Finishing Move: "Studbuster": "S.Y.P.": double underhook Fisherman-buster gourdbuster Superplex off top rope Tag team finisher: "Unskinny Bop": Adam hits the opponent with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and holds him in it as Dan comes off the top rope with a 450 degree splash, leading to the pinfall. Primary attributes: 1. Mat 1. Aerial 2. Teamwork 2. Teamwork 3. Aerial 3. Mat Profile: The Down Boys have been wrestling together as a team since 1989.  The duo wrestled in small, independant organizations before finally joining the UWA.  The two stayed until 1992, when the UWA eventually folded.  Awesome T took his men to the place where their talents would truly be appreciated, Japan; where not only would they be respected, but they could learn at the same time.  Respected and sucessful in almost all of the promotions they entered, the Down Boys were quite comfortable in their new home... until a group of businessmen threw a few piles of money towards Adam and Dan. The money was overwhelming, and the DB's got on the first plane back to the States.  Unfortunately, five years had past since their last visits, and fashion had moved on... without them.  Still with the big hair and the acid-washed denim that they left with, the Down Boys still sport the style today, and get ridiculed by the hardass fans because of it.  But not the smart fans, who look past the clothes and see the true lucha/New Japan Jr. style of wrestling that Adam Peterson and Dan Oliver bring to the states.  Although not the brightest bulbs in the world (which is why Awesome T attempts to do all the talking), Adam and Dan have an incredible knowledge of holds and counterholds... leading them to be known, as one reporter called them, "the idiot savants of wrestling." [Handler: Tom Edwards (AwesomeT19@aol.com)] [The scene changes once more, to footage captioned, "Earlier This Week." Darkness.  A spotlight from above turns on and reveals a white male dressed in baggy jeans, a Seattle Mariners #19 jersey, a baseball cap turned backwards, and a pair of Timberland boots.  He holds in his hand a baseball bat, which upon closer inspection, has the engravement of Jay Buhner's signature on the barrell.  The gentleman, who is a little over 6 feet tall and sports a goatee, smiles for the camera.] Awesome T: So this is it.  This is what it has come to.  Back in the States after 5 years.  And we have to start it all over again.  How soon they forget.  Well, anyway, let me first introduce myself.  My name, is Awesome T. I am currently 27 years old and have been managing professional wrestlers since I was 17.  At one time, I once fancied myself as a professional wrestler.  But after going through my training, I suffered a severe knee injury very early in my career.  I took up managing full time instead.  But enough about me.  We're here to talk about the greatest tag team...[under his breath] now begging for a job...er, in the World today!  "Superstud" Adam Peterson and "Dazzling" Dan Oliver, THE DOWN BOYS! ["Down Boys" by Warrant begins to play in the background, and Awesome T flashes a wide smile.  He walks to his left, our right, until another spotlight pops on...this time on a pair of tag team championship belts.] Awesome T: When the Down Boys first began to wrestle, they joined the UWA. Soon after they joined, they won the UWA Florida Tag Team championships... [As T is talking, a clip begins to play of the Down Boys, bloody, pinning an individual in front of about 4,000 people.  They hold up the belts that are now shown on the spotlight.] Awesome T:  ...but that was not to be.  They soon lost those belts, and even with the satisfaction of winning a few singles titles, nothing could compare to the thrill of winning as a team.  So, in 1992, they left the UWA, after it folded, heading straight for Japan. [T walks further to his left until another spotlight comes on, this time on a framed newspaper, written in Japanese with many large exclaimation points on it.] Awesome T: Everything went fine in Japan, until we went to All Japan.  Baba insisted I not be a part of the team -- I stayed in New Japan managing others -- and that they constantly do jobs to put his wrestlers over.  Well, one night... [Clip begins to roll.  We see Peterson, Oliver, and Abdullah the Butcher vs. Giant Baba and two other unrecognisable wrestlers.] ...Adam and Dan teamed with Abdullah the Butcher to face Baba and two of his guys.  Now, mind you, the Down Boys had been doing jobs for a while now, and their reps were looking bad.  But tonight, they were really looking good. [Clip shows Adam Peterson on a roll, hitting many moves in a row.  Baba is then tagged in, and goes after Peterson] Awesome T:  Well, Baba comes in, and you know he just want to steal the show, hammering down the little Gaijin.  Well, look what happens when he tries it... [Baba grabs Peterson and goes for a big Baba chop, which Peterson doesn't sell at all, drawing gasps from the crowd.  Baba starts yelling at Peterson, and Peterson lays in about 15 kicks on Baba, sending him crashing to the ground.  Oliver grabs Peterson, and the two make a break for the exit, to the boos and debris of the crowd.] Awesome T:  ...well, needless to say, The Down Boys were released from their contract.  We were all having a good time until some men in very nice suits gave us this... [The next spotlight appears to show numerous, full sacks with dollar signs on them.] Awesome T:  ...a lot of money.  We were asked to come back to wrestle in a fed called the IWWC.  Needless to say, the Down Boys were excellent, winning the IWWC National Tag Team Titles, but our enormous salary prevented them from giving us the national exposure we really needed to get seen again in America, which leaves us where we are today.  Looking for employment.  But keep in mind, when you sign the Down Boys, you are getting two of the most intellegent tactical wrestlers in professional wrestling today... men who excel far above the rest... ladies and gentlemen, I give you, THE DOWN BOYS! [T extends his hand and the next spotlight comes on, revealing two bent-over bare asses.  You guessed it, the Down Boys are mooning the camera.] Awesome T:  What the... guys!  You realise we're trying desperately to find out where your next paycheck is coming from?  This organization is a serious fed, and you're showing them your ass! Dan Oliver:  His has pimples because he's old... Adam Peterson: Shut up!  T... T... T... [still with his rear showing] you gonna get us that job you were talking about?  I'm getting tired of table dances. Awesome T: Adam... for the last time... that was a McDonald's, and the woman only asked to use your salt.  You almost got us arrested! Dan Oliver: You know what's going to happen to us if we don't start working soon... Adam Peterson: Yeah, Danny... [The Down Boys Begin to play air guitar... still bare-assed.] Dan Oliver:  "Tommy's got his six-string in hock..." Awesome T: Shut up. Adam Peterson: "Now he's holdin' in, when he used to make it talk so tough..." Dan Oliver: "So tough..." Awesome T:  Shut up... Adam & Dan:  "We gotta hold on, to what we got...it doesn't make a difference if we make it or not... we got each other, and that's a lot for lo... er... we'll give it a shot!" [Awesome T shakes his head] Adam & Dan: "OOOOOOOH, WE'RE HALF WAY THERE!  OOOOOOOOOH!  LIVIN' ON A PRAYER!" Awesome T: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! Adam Peterson: Damn... sorry man.  So, do we get the job? Awesome T: I don't know... it's up to them to decide... what do you think?! [Fade. The next montage swirls onto the screen:] "One Man Army" Dakota Bundy ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Weight: 228lbs Height: 6'1" Origin: York, PA Manager: "The Mouth" Matt Malone Appearance: Possessed of a rugged build, he wears black trunks and boots, and his head lacks hair, but not scars. It is totally covered in scars, as is most of his face.  But he wears face-paint: a black square covering most of his face, with a red and gold rim.  Many of his teeth are missing, and to be honest, he's never going to win a beauty contest. Theme Music: "Climbatize" by The Prodigy Orientation: Heel Five Favorite Moves: 1.  BundyBreaker: A backbreaker onto the knee which he holds, turning into a modified torture rack on his knee.  A perfect example of Bundy's intelligent style of wrestling, melding one move into the next with amazing fluidity. 2.  Nutcracker: Piledriver/Pin combo.  Another example of Bundy's fluid style, and a great match winner.  Tombstone piledriver, and then he sort of turns the opponent into a bow by moving the head/shoulders into a pinning position, holding their legs and kneeling on their outstretched arms.  Difficult to escape from. 3.  Devils Claws: Vicious facerake.  Dakota Bundy has long and sharper than average nails, and when he rakes someone's face or body, it leaves traces -- generally bloody traces. 4.  DBT: double arm underhook DDT. 5. Eternity:  Horizontal full-nelson leg hook.  The opponent is face down on the mat.  Bundy moves on top of them, locks on a full nelson and then hooks his feet around their ankles, with his knees on the mat as stabilisers, so they can't kick out. Maybe not the most painful move in the world, but the only way to escape from it is to be damn strong. Finishing Move: Firearm: a devastating quick forearm.  It's almost inhumanly fast, and the way that he can produce it out of anywhere, and the fact that it knocks opponents out, makes it one of the most devastating finishers around.  It's a lightning fast forearm to the jaw or the back of the neck.  Both have the same effect.  And everyone is equally susceptible, no matter how big or small. Primary attributes: 1. Intelligence 2. Brawling 3. Mat Profile: Bundy is a veteran of wrestling, that much is certain.   His intelligent style of wrestling, plus the way his moves flow from one to the next clearly indicate years of ring experience.  His ring experience, however, has not been as successful as it should have been.  For the last fifteen years of his career, he has trawled through independent federations with no guidance, and with no focus.  Finally, Matt Malone, an astute business man and a wrestling fan spotted Bundy at an SRW event and saw the ability... and the money-making potential. Matt Malone bears a resemblance to James Belushi, and is always wearing his dark-blue suit.  He does most of the talking for Bundy, and at ringside, he always knows the right things to say to distract other wrestlers, though he won't physically get involved in a match, because it's against his principles. In a way, there are few other wrestlers like Dakota Bundy and Matt Malone -- two men hated by fans, but try their best to win within the rules. Matt Malone takes care of the business side of things, steering Bundy in the right direction, allowing Dakota to concentrate on causing pain.  In 1997, under Matt Malone's guidance, as of the beginning of September 1997, Bundy is yet to be beaten in singles competition. Matt Malone, a great manager to have at ringside.  He doesn't physically interfere, but can really irritate Bundy's opponents.  After all, he isn't called "The Mouth" for nothing.  Bundy, as stated is a true veteran wrestler who really knows his game, having fought it in some of the hardest and most blood thirsty leagues around.  Matt Malone now keeps him away from extreme matches as much as possible, due to the amount they take out of his wrestler. Bundy is also intimidating.  Bundy's reputation, and looks, give him an edge against many opponents. And in the ring, he is totally evil, setting out to destroy his opponent within the rules of the game, and sometimes outside it.  His most deadly weapon -- and most controversial -- is the "Devils Claws," which are four inch long fingernails, filed to a sharp point.   When he rakes people's faces or back, they bleed.  The Devils Claws have taken more blood than Dracula, and nobody is sure whether they are illegal or not.  Any fed that has tried to ban them has quickly had a lawsuit against them by Matt Malone. Furthermore, Bundy is a total sadist in the ring who truly shows no mercy. If he hears an opponent screaming in pain from a hold, he'll make sure he makes it even more painful.  Wins most of his matches through submission, but is beginning to use the Firearm more and more as a finisher, and as a way of clearing house.  He earned the name "One Man Army" when he eliminated seven men in a three minute spell in the IWE Rumble, mostly with his Firearm. But if Matt Malone is in trouble, Bundy will go to help him.  Bundy knows about loyalty. Furthermore, because Bundy is very slow and methodical, he lacks any pace, and so a high-speed attack could be fairly effective against him.  He is not very big physically.  Not the strongest of wrestlers either, but he is smart, always thinking five moves ahead. Bundy is in the IIWF to finally create a name for himself in his twilight years, although many say he is just reaching his peak. [Handler: Jacob Kane (jake@traffcom.co.uk)] [The scene changes, cutting to footage captioned: "Earlier This Week." The time is three in the morning.  Dakota Bundy and Matt Malone have just arrived at the IIWF Coliseum.  Matt Malone looks exceptionally tired, but Dakota Bundy is taking in the whole ambience of the place...] MM: Amazing, isn't it?  Even at three in the morning, the IIWF Coliseum, home to so many great battles... well, it still has so much, doesn't it? [Bundy, dressed in a vest and ripped jeans, nods his scarred, toothless head.] MM: I mean, I've been in rings from one end of the world to the other. Some are bigger, some are smaller, but very few have such history... and in such a short time.  Yeah, without doubt, the IIWF is the big time. Big time.  You're not going to let me down, are you, Dakota? [Bundy, bouncing on the ropes, testing their strength, shakes his head.] MM: You know, it took a lot of time and effort to get you into the IIWF.  But it's because I believe in you.  Because I know and I've seen you perform so well.  In this last year alone, under my guidance, how many times have you been beaten? [Bundy holds up four fingers.] MM: Exactly.  You're big time material, Dakota, really big time.  But this is your last chance.  You've got to make the most of the time you have here. [Malone lights up a cigar.  He puffs on it, seeing the smoke slowly dispell across the dimly lit IIWF ring.] MM: Aaaaah, perfect.  Dakota, I still can't believe it. [Dakota is looking under the ring.] MM: Do you know what I'm going to love best though, Dakota?  It's the fact that you're going to show all these so-called superstars what wrestling is all about.  Take that Scott Rogers, the biggest waste of flesh on the planet.  Or Billy Shakespeare.  Or Requiem. There is nothing about them that I would consider special.  There is nothing about them that cannot be beaten.  I've studied every IIWF wrestler, and you can beat them all.  You see, you've got something none of them have got -- ME!  "The Mouth" Matt Malone. [Dakota picks up the ring bell and smiles a toothless grin.] MM: Hey, put that down.  Remember, we keep to the rules.  If you lose, that means I lose out on cash, and that means I'm not happy, so stick clear of DQs and countouts.  You have the ability to win it in the ring -- so do it!  No more hardcore tactics either. They take too much out of you.  Dakota, we'll keep to wrestling as we have for the last year -- efficient, fluid, painful.  It's what you do best.  Now let's go beat the rest. [Malone stubs his cigar out on the mat, and walks off down the aisle with Dakota Bundy. Fade through to another montage:] NATURAL PREDATORS ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Orientation: Face Manager: Kuyler Greyson Theme Music: "Rain" by Qkumba Zoo Wrestler: Bear Wolf Height: 6'10" 6'2" Weight: 385lbs 247lbs Origin: Born Kinzua, PA, 12/12/75 Born Norfolk, VA, 16/10/70 Appearance: Tall, burly, muscular Native Muscular well-built American with similar Anglo-Saxon/Native American musculature to John Studd. features, wearing black Wears a buckskin costume, karate pants with insignias full body, with room for of Wolf heads on the hips mobility. and the name "Wolf" written along the outside of the legs. Favourite moves: 1. Bear Hug 1. Enzuigiri 2. Powerslam 2. Superkick 3. Vertical suplex 3. Hurricanrana 4. Belly to back suplex 4. Snap Suplex 5. Full nelson 5. Standing dropkick Finishing move: Steeltrap: gutwrench fishermanplex Tag Team Finisher: Natural Selection: Bear grabs opponent around waist, runs him into their corner. Tagging Wolf at impact, pulls other wrestler back. Wolf superkicks opponent, momentum into a belly to back suplex from Bear. Wolf pin, Bear guards. Primary attributes: 1. Strength 1. Intelligence 2. Toughness 2. Technical 3. Technical 3. Teamwork Profile: Bear was born in Kinzua, raised as a strongman who earned backup honors with the US Olympic Weightlifting team, and was discovered by Kuyler Greyson in an amateur event in Western PA. He has since held one half of the tag titles with Wolf as the Natural Predators in the SAW (TV title) and FFPW (Continental). He was also the Intercontinental Champion in SAW before its first folding. Wolf is an accomplished veteran wrester of seven years, and teamed with Bear to form Natural Predators. Knows the ring and knows the ways well, enjoying this popularity earned from SAW and FPW fans. A tough opponent by all counts. [Handler: André Dec (ug95290424@emerson.edu)] ________ ______ | || |\ \ /\ / /| __|.................................................. | || | \ v v / | __| COMING FRIDAY: Countdown to Saturday Night |_||_| \_/\_/ |_|.................................................... TD: Well, that will do it, Steve Roberts. SR: Nah... let's take another spin around the Ocean for good luck. TD: No.  Remember folks, no War Room tomorrow night... War Room will return from Canada next week -- but on Friday Larry Morton and Brian Lau will, as always, "Countdown to Saturday Night". SR: Dammit Morton, show some backbone, you're making us all look bad. TD: You don't so much mean that, Steve Roberts. SR: No.  Couldn't care less.  Hey, Tokyo... lock up your women and chidren, the Soundbite is on his way! TD: Then, of course, live from the Egg Dome in Tokyo will be the finest two hours of weekly live wrestling anywhere in the world -- IIWF Saturday Night!  Don't miss a second of the action. [Dross smiles professionally... then passes out.] SR: Ah, hell.  Dross is dead.  You people killed my buddy Dross.  First Goose, then Mother Theresa, then Dross.  Tragedies always happen in threes. I'm the Soundbite.  Show's over.  Go away. ["(She's) Sexy + 17" by the Stray Cats kicks in as the Soundbite takes a look at Dross' slumped over form -- then shrugs his shoulders and begins motioning to Nils to go into an inverted dive... Roberts taking a camera from his pocket as the shot and the music fade.] +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= I * I * W * F =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ | President: Daniel Spreadbury | Vice-President: Jim Jividen | | univ0322@sable.ox.ac.uk | brokeback@webtv.net | | iiwf@sisko.demon.co.uk | | +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- http://www.sisko.demon.co.uk -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+